My rhythm of everyday life has become a secret duality: in the morning I carried myself on as an invisible companion of Sora and, in the most meticulously selected and controlled way, sculpted the resistance of Akari in the perfumed seclusion of the studio.
During the day I was the Golden Blossom, moving the dangerous water of the world of academic social life into place at Kounan University, with Yui acting as the fixed point and outlet of the emotional. It was a tiring performance, but the results were attained. The nervousness of fear had calmed down and a cold, calculated composure had taken its place.
However, one collision was not to be avoided, an engagement with the ghost of my former character, in the person of my nearest friend.
This experience occurred with the end of my late morning lecture. I was leaving the building of humanities, and in full conversation with Yui about a little known Japanese painter whom she was so much enthalled with. We have touched on the use of negative space by the artist that is a serendipitous theme considering the expansive negative space created by absence of Akihiro in the sociocultural sphere.
Hiroto came out of the crowd, as though he appeared in the actual space. His attitude spoke the usual masculine swagger, but his facial expression was uneasy, full fledged seriousness, like there might be with a headache, which had not been there before the change.
The instinct of tightening was felt, but I appealed to Sora, too, discipline, not distraction. I hesitated, giving Yui time to finish her examination of the artist and I looked back to Hiroto, trying to be cool, very polite.
Hiroto stood still and swayed between my calm attitude and the peaceful air of Yui. He was temporarily unnerved by the stature of Yui in the college of art a third year prodigy of art, whose friends and his own friends seldom intermingled.
Yui, indirectly yet with force, intraprojected, Hiroto, Akari has shown that she is busy. In case this is related to the disappearance of a person, it may be wise to address the university administration or law enforcing bodies. Her action was a subtle yet refined redirection and refraction to make his urgency a procedural exigence but not a person need.
The face of Hiroto became even tighter with annoyance. Both Yui and I put on an impression of cold indifference and formal manners that was united and indifferent, despite the fact that both were used to using their emotions to gain the emotional compliance of young ladies, and though it was beneath the surface, his latent feelings of frustration, longing, confusion began to break out on the surface.
You are acting weird, Akari, he thought. You pretend that you do not care about the disappearance of Akihiro, you use an accusation as a personal weapon.
The reproach laid at the very root of my secret guiltyness, and caused a momentary shudder; but I answered with the coolness which is trained on the yoga mat.
I stared down at him my amber eye, the same eye with which I had stared Akihiro and hung upon him. I responded by saying I cared about everyone that I knew, Hiroto, however, I will not allow you to create a show during the campus life due to a supposed schedule clash. In case you want to talk about Akihiro, you will have to schedule a certain time and place through message. Without this, you are only again distracting me out of my studies.
I was dismissed in no uncertain terms, and in a very civil manner, as though I were the deity of a college, and had more important business to attend to. The expulsion of the cold was so hard that Hiroto could only say a weak Fine.
Yui gave a slight nod to her as we walked out so lightly, it passed unnoticed but when Yui did, she gave me a slight stroke on the arm a kind of approval, it seemed to me Akari chan. He was by no means expecting your calmness, you see.
A wave of intricate victory fell through my heart; it was not, as with brute strength, the ghost of my former self that had met my challenge but by the gentle art of Akari with her poised grace and her calculated composure. It was now instinctive in performance.
But in the learning of the position of Akari, an irreparable loss of the memory of Akihiro was taking place.