Chapter 16: The Incident II
Before the atmosphere could grow any more awkward, Haley appeared and hugged her grandmother. "Hey, Nana."
"Oh, my little comet," DeDe said affectionately. "Oh, look at you. You're all grown up." She gave her granddaughter a once-over.
"Hmm, tell Mom that." Haley glanced at Claire in defiance. "She won't even let me go to a prom," she revealed.
"Overnight with her boyfriend," Claire clarified.
"Of course it's overnight, Claire." I spread my arms. "It's a prom, not a matinee."
DeDe burst out laughing.
"What are you laughing at?" Claire gave her a glare.
"Oh, karma's a funny thing, that's all. Remember Ricky?" DeDe mentioned to her daughter suggestively.
Wow, I thought she laughed at my sharp remark. As expected of this human waste, she doesn't appreciate good sarcasm.
"Oh, God," Claire groaned.
"Oh, who's Ricky?" Haley asked, appearing engaged.
"No one."
"Ricky was your mother's boyfriend, and he looked like Charles Manson. One night, she didn't come home until 4:00 in the morning," DeDe revealed.
"4:00? Wow. Mom, what were you and Ricky doing?" Haley asked, grinning and raising her eyebrows.
"Probably studying, just like me and Brenda," I chimed in.
"You are not helping, Jake." Claire shot me a look.
"Did I look like I wanted to help?" I smirked at her. I have another motto: if you can't help, make it worse. The important thing is to take part.
"Nothing," Claire went back to her daughter. "We were doing nothing, and he was a very sweet boy, which you might have known if you bothered to get to know him," she added, directing the last part toward her mother.
"Dylan's a sweet boy," Haley argued.
"Dylan." Claire scoffed, crossing her arms. "Dylan is no Ricky. Ricky was a poet."
"Dylan writes songs - awesome songs. And maybe you would know that if you bothered to get to know him." Haley retorted.
"Ha!" DeDe snapped at her daughter triumphantly.
"Okay, you know, first of all, I am not my mother. I don't judge people before I get a chance to know them," Claire defended herself.
"So you invite Dylan over to dinner tonight, and if he's as sweet and kind as you say he is, then I have no problem considering letting you go to the prom - after I do a background check on the school," Claire declared.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you, Mom," Haley said excitedly. "Okay, I'm gonna go call him." She ran off to her room.
"That's very revealing," DeDe remarked.
"That's my parenting style," Claire answered.
"No, I meant your blouse."
"Mom!" Claire protested.
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Three days later, the Dunphy family was gathered at Jay's house. Haley and Dylan were already dressed and ready for the prom.
"Are we all set?" I looked at the two of them; I was also wearing the suit Jay had given me.
"I can't believe Mom is in the hospital," Claire said thoughtfully.
DeDe had broken her hip after a fall. Luke was grounded for leaving his toys scattered on the floor (the cause of her accident), even though he swore he hadn't left anything in the living room.
"Well, at least now everything is peaceful," Jay pointed out, "since DeDe apologized and happened to slip just as she was about to hug Gloria."
Gloria had been furious at first when she saw DeDe at the dinner as well, but later made peace. Still, I could see her hiding a smile when DeDe fell.
DeDe has nothing to complain about since she found her closure. Nor does Luke, since he got new toys.
"We didn't get the chance to hear Dylan sing," Phil sighed, receiving a glare from Claire.
"I'm sure he can do that at the next family lunch, right Dylan?" I asked, looking at Haley's boyfriend.
"Yes," he replied awkwardly. "I can sing the song I wrote for Haley, In the Moonlight," he added, receiving a delighted hug from his girlfriend.
"Something tells me it was better he didn't sing that night," I murmured.
Dumb people tend to do dumb things.
Then the intercom rang.
"It's the limo I rented. Let's go," I said.
"Remember, I don't want to see you coming back drunk," Claire cautioned Haley, as if that would really stop her.
"Don't look at me, Claire, I won't take care of these two," I had already warned. "It's Brenda's prom, a special day for her." I looked firmly at Haley.
She huffed but said, "I know, I know, I know how to behave!"
And Phil intervened, lightening the mood, "Let's take one more picture," earning a groan from Haley.
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Haley looked at the bouquet of flowers I was holding, along with a gift in my hands, and she smirked. "I didn't think you were the romantic type."
I rolled my eyes. "I just want to make it special."
"I thought you two would break up after she went to college," Haley said, fishing for gossip.
"It could happen," I didn't want to get into the subject. "But that doesn't mean I wouldn't do my best."
The limousine stopped in front of Brenda's house, and only I stepped out.
She soon opened the door as soon as I rang the bell.
I admired her for a moment and gave a smile. "You're gorgeous in that red dress, Bren."
She smiled back. "I like yours too, it gives me memories," she said, placing a finger on her chin thoughtfully.
"Oye, don't tease me now, or I'll ignore the fact that your father is staring at me like a hawk," I nodded lightly in his direction.
"And this is for you," I handed her the flowers and the gift.
She unwrapped it and saw that it was a Tiffany pendant, a discreet style with a small diamond in the center (I paid two grand for it; I didn't want to give something overly luxurious, but neither something unimpressive).
"It's beautiful!!" she exclaimed, taking off the one she was wearing and asking me to put it on her, turning her back to me.
Her mother approached, admired it as well, and whispered something to her daughter. She wished us a good prom night and returned to her husband's side.
"What did she say?" I asked curiously.
"Nothing much, just that she would take Dad away to improve his mood."
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