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A/N: 🎧 Song Recommendation: Hold On by Chord Overstreet.
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"If there's one thing they say about life, it's that you never know what you had until it's gone..."
"...And you never, ever realize the privilege of touching grass until you can't. Some lose their privilege by choice; others by circumstances.
Well, mine was a choice..."
A wet cough tore through the monologue, followed by a bitter chuckle.
The man lying on the floor looked like a collapsed mountain of flesh. His belly pressed against his t-shirt with each painful gasp, and the weight of his obese body made standing impossible.
He wiped the blood from his lips, his eyes gleaming with a crazy look and a strange, shameless laugh bubbling up from his chest.
"Enough with the bullshit speech, Von," he spoke to himself. "I guess it's finally time."
With a frustrated grunt, Von clawed at the floor, dragging his heavy frame across. His arm felt heavy as he reached toward the phone lying just out of reach.
But eventually, he did so and handled it.
Ring... Ring...
The call picked up immediately.
"Von? What is it? Are you okay? Von, talk to me!" a stressed soft voice came through.
Von focused, trying to force a clear breath. "Hey, sis... I just wanted to let you know that... the eagle has landed. "
A gasp tore through the line immediately. "No! Don't you dare panic! Von, listen to me, take your meds! I'm calling 911! I'll be there with the ambulance in no time, you hear me? Just hold on, Von!" she begged, tears already wetting her voice.
Von breathed in heavily, forcing a cough and another chuckle. "No, sis. Chill out. Forget the ambulance, it's not needed anymore. I... think this might be it, sis. It's a code red, and I can't hold on. Maybe... It's finally time."
The silence on the other end stretched for seconds.
"Sis? Nana?"
There was no reply, only muffled sounds of his sister weeping.
Hearing his sister cry, the defiant smile that had been fixed on his face finally shattered, and tears poured from his own eyes too. He didn't try to stop the shared weeping that filled the line.
"Nana..."
Von finally broke the silence.
"Nana... I have something to tell you."
"..."
"I'm so sorry for always being a burden. I'm sorry for not appreciating you. I'm sorry for not changing..." Von's composure completely collapsed.
Tears, snot, and sweat filled his face as he sobbed uncontrollably.
"Nana... I love you! You're the best sister any brother can ask for. Thank you... Thank you for everything, Nana!"
He managed a tremendous effort, forcing a genuine smile despite the pain.
"And hey… after I die, I want you to live a damn happy life. Find yourself a good man. And if he ever treats you wrong, I'll crawl out of whatever hell they dump me in and beat his ass myself."
He heard her sobs reduce to shaky breaths, allowing his last, painful breath. "This is it, Nana... I'll always love you, sis!"
Before she could respond, Von coughed and threw the phone away. He was exhausted, and his eyes were close to shutting.
Darting around the room one last time. The floor was covered in trash, empty bags of chips, old containers, and stacks of dusty anime discs... everything he had used to hide from reality. It was a monument to his selfishness.
Soft music played softly in the background. It was a cheerful pop song he once blasted proudly. Now it felt hollow.
He took one last look at the catastrophic room, at the life he couldn't fix… the body he couldn't escape… the love he never deserved.
...And he finally let his eyes shut.
Von was dead.
***
What happens when we die?
While there was no proven answer to that question, billions of people across history held onto their own different beliefs. Some believed in golden clouds, others in reincarnation, and some in nothing at all.
But now, the time had finally come for Von to find out.
Floating in an endless, pitch-black expanse, Von was mulling over this very question. His nervousness grew with every passing second as he waited for an answer, for a judgment, or perhaps just for the lights to go out permanently.
But the silence stretched on, and his consciousness remained surprisingly intact.
"Hold on. I'm able to think... So... We don't actually die when we die!"
This news was very positive to him. It meant he still existed. But as the relief washed over him, something still felt odd.
'I feel like I can do much more than just think.'
It was a strange sensation, and like a reflex action, he tried opening his eyes.
Light came through immediately.
It wasn't the white light of heaven, but the harsh, yellow glare of sunlight streaming through a window. The brightness made him shield his face instantly with a forearm before his eyes adjusted to the sudden assault.
That was when Von came to terms with what was going on. He wasn't floating. He was lying on a soft surface.
He sat up abruptly and brought his hands up to feel his face. It was warm. It was solid. He could really feel it!
Desperate to confirm reality, he pinched his skin, and alas! The pain was there!
"No way... Was that all a dream!?" Von exclaimed outwardly.
"Uh... You had a bad dream?" a voice asked with a nervous chuckle from the other side of the room.
Von snapped his head toward the source of the sound.
Standing near the door was a young man dressed up neatly in a well-ironed white shirt tucked into black trousers, paired with a matching vest and a perfectly knotted tie. His shoes were also polished to a mirror shine.
Coupled with his thick, round glasses and an innocent, slightly timid smile, he was best described as a nerd.
Von's jaw dropped.
"Zack! Is that you?!"
Zack blinked, looking confused by the outburst. He reached up and awkwardly scratched the back of his head.
"Apparently, yes?" Zack replied, clearly unsure how to handle Von's sudden energy.
He quickly cleared his throat, eager to change the topic to something safer. "Anyway... you're up early today? Will you be attending class?"
The last question had an urgency to it that practically begged for a yes.
"Class? No... I mean, yes. Just... I don't know, but I'll see," Von finally replied after the small confusion, his thoughts still a jumbled mess.
Zack seemed to deflate slightly but nodded nonetheless. "Alright then... I'll get going. But please, try to do so... You missed the last one already."
After getting a vague nod from Von, he slung his heavy leather bag over his shoulders and left through the door.
"Bye, Von!"
"Bye..." Von mumbled in reply.
The door clicked shut, leaving the room silent.
After ensuring Zack was truly gone, Von stood up. 'That was really Zack... Zack Tuna.'
In Von's previous life, that timid boy had grown up to become the famous, successful lawyer known across the entire state. He was a bestseller author of legal thrillers and a man Von had watched on TV from his trash-filled room.
It wasn't that much of a surprise considering he was once Von's roommate here at the University of Miami.
Back then, Von had treated him badly. He had been a terrible roommate, always bullying Zack, taking his things without asking, and mocking his studious nature.
In the end, that behavior had bitten back at him hard. Zack became a success, while Von let his life waste away into nothingness.
'I really was an asshole,' Von said to himself with deep regret as the memories of his past mistakes came flooding back.
But now, it seemed things were different.
Von felt a surge of adrenaline. He rushed over to the full-length mirror attached to the closet door to have a look at his appearance.
He stared at the reflection.
Messy black hair that hadn't been washed in a day or two. Striking violet eyes that widened in disbelief. Fair skin that looked relatively healthy, not gray and sickly like it had been in his final moments.
Everything was the same. It was him!
He still had a big frame, but it hadn't gotten so worse yet. He wasn't the immobilized mountain of flesh he had been on that floor. He was just a heavy college student.
Von grabbed the pillow from his bed and buried his face in it to cover his mouth.
"YES!" he screamed into the fabric.
He pulled the pillow away, grinning like a maniac. He was really excited.
"All those years... the pain, the death... it can't be all a dream," he muttered. "Which only means one thing. I went back in time!"
Ding!
He was still processing his thoughts when a soft, mechanical sound rang clearly in his head, and suddenly, text filled his vision, glowing on a purple translucent screen that hovered in the air before him.
[Welcome back, Von. The Superstar System is online!]