Chapter One
Andrew's POV
I have tried dating girls before in the past, but it was never enough. I'd always feel
empty afterwards.
The sex was dry and stale,never really had an orgasm—but they
always praised me afterwards.
Strange thing, really: they all said I was good in bed, but only I knew the full story. In order to keep my cock hard, I'd let my mind drift off
to that one time I shared a kiss with a boy when I was younger. The way he felt was
still vivid in my mind.
It all started during summer camp. That was when I discovered that I wasn't the way
My dad and everyone else saw me. I've always ignored the feeling whenever it rose up.
It was a strange feeling I'd get whenever we were in the locker room after
football practice—the rush I'd always get staring at boys as they showered, comparing their hard butts, the shape of their thighs, their dicks and the way they'd
swing to and fro when they walked. It was strange and exhilarating, a feeling I hated
but I also liked it.
It was a love and hate relationship that I struggled with. There was this kid we'd always bully then, though I hated participating because of
how hurt I'd always be afterwards, but did it anyway just to keep up appearances
during camp. He'd always stare at us during shower time, and his dick rose on one
occasion. It was all new to me; I was surprised. The boys started calling him names
like 'fag,' 'gay,' and I had to join in. Hurting him hurt more than I'd ever imagined. I'd
always punish myself for it afterwards—mentally and physically.
I can still recall his name: Henry. His frailty was what attracted my attention towards
him. His small stature, big eyes, shy, pink soft lips, and the way he darted his eyes all
around the place. I still remember how he smiled back then, the curve of his lips, the
The way he squinted his eyes drew me in even more. I hated the way I was so affected by
his mere presence—it annoyed the fuck out of me. I tried ignoring him, but it was
futile. I remember getting pissed whenever I saw him with this dude, Ethan—I think
That was his name—who he called a friend. Their closeness irritated me a lot and I
I didn't like it, but what could I have done? They clearly knew each other from
somewhere. Gosh, I hated the prick. He'd always sport a smile, but I could see how
rotten he was inside. He could fool everyone else but not me, because I was also
good at pretending.
It felt good when I punched him during one of our clashes while we went hiking up in
the mountains.
That's when the whole thing started: when the guys went over to
pick on him, and Henry, the prick that he is, wanted to stand up to us. I tried
protecting Henry from all the scuffles, but I didn't hesitate to land a punch on his
pretentious face when I got the chance. It was sweet, and out of nowhere someone
screamed 'bear!' and everyone scattered in different directions. In all the chaos, by
Some stroke of luck, Henry and I ended up getting lost together.
Later a storm
started and we had to find a place to hide, which we were lucky enough to find a cave.
I gathered pieces of wood to start a fire because I noticed him shivering. Seeing him
there with me, I was happy, but I kept it all hidden under an angry facade while fake
cursing and giving him the stink eye.
It was one of the best periods of my life, that
brief moment with him. Later on, I noticed him still shivering and I couldn't help it. I
offered that we could lie close to each other to get warmer faster. I noticed a blush
creeping on his face and he stared at me through the corner of his eyes. It was all so
cute and sweet, my heart couldn't help but flutter. That's when I felt it—that why I
I always felt I was different from my friends: I was in love with a boy. The realization
hit me like a ton of bricks. I almost wanted to lash out at him out of sheer panic to
hide my embarrassment, but to my surprise he agreed, and the words got stuck in
my throat. I turned my face away to hide my own blush and he shuffled closer. As he
did, my blush deepened and my heart started to race—a boy was making me like this.
I heard my dad's voice in my head calling me a disappointment, and this one time, I
actually felt he was right. I smiled self-mockingly. My attention was dragged back by
the sound of him shuffling close to me; my heart rate increased. By the gods, WHAT!!
Was it happening to me? He looked so small close to me, but he was making me feel
things I didn't know I could feel. I felt my throat dry and I swallowed instinctively. He
was so close but yet so far. I shuffled closer to him once. I felt his breathing settle
into a steady rhythm. I studied the outline of his face—his eyelashes thick and dark, his lips soft and pink, the way they pursed when he slept, the flare of his nose, his
strong but feminine jaw, the rising and falling of his chest, the flare of his hips. I felt
light-headed with the way all the blood was rushing to my cock. It was a surreal
feeling—the girls, the porn, and porn magazines I'd seen have never gotten me like
this. It was all so new to me. Unable to control myself, I felt my hands slide down my
legs and I reached into my pants. I brought my cock out and started stroking myself
while I watched him sleep, imagining what I'd make him do—I'd make him get on his
knees and make him suck me off. I felt my toes curl at this. It was crazy, so crazy
what I was doing, but I didn't care, not now, not when I was so close.
I felt my breath quicken and I felt him shift, and knew he might have woken up with
the way, but I didn't care—I wasn't ready to stop, not now. I could feel the pressure
build up, just the way my friends described whenever they gave me porn videos or
magazines or when they described the girls they were with, and I've never felt that
way with the girls I've been with, but here I was, getting my first ever real orgasm. It
was mind-blowing. I saw stars as I felt rope after rope of cum shoot out. I felt him
shudder while I groaned out the last shot, then I took my hands off, my breaths
heavy, my head still buzzing from how hard I came. When I calmed down, I heard his
breathing—erratic—and I for sure knew he was awake.
I looked at the mess between us I made. I looked at him and said, "I know you're
awake," and I saw him stiffen up.p