Chapter 247: You Are Not Allowed to Insult Madara
"Why is she so normal?"
The people in the audience seats were utterly baffled.
From time to time, they glanced at the Fū from the real world.
Just as everyone was getting used to the absurdity of the Limited Tsukuyomi world, a completely normal person suddenly appeared.
Although the Seven-Tails inside her demanding that she lay eggs and eat people was still rather perverse, she had refused, and nothing had happened.
Why?
Was it because she was one of the core figures of the Limited Tsukuyomi?
That didn't make sense either. The Two-Tails' Jinchūriki from Kumogakure was also a core figure, yet she had suffered a miserable fate and been locked away in some QQ space.
This wasn't fair!
Both sides felt like they were getting the short end of the stick.
"Tsunade, aren't you pretty normal too? It's just that Katsuyu has… some issues."
Orochimaru offered a word of consolation to the gloomy and irritated Tsunade.
Indeed, aside from becoming flat, this world's Tsunade wasn't really that different.
As for defending furry enthusiasts, that was simply common sense for people of this world. Tsunade herself hadn't actually done anything.
Only Katsuyu's healing methods were somewhat… unorthodox.
If Katsuyu was perverted, what did that have to do with Tsunade?
Just like the Seven-Tails being perverted had nothing to do with Fū.
"You wouldn't understand."
Tsunade shot Orochimaru a glance and said no more.
"Oh."
The moment Tsunade said "you wouldn't understand," Orochimaru instantly understood and wisely stopped asking.
"…Damn it."
Tsunade could tell Orochimaru had understood her "you wouldn't understand," which only made her more annoyed.
Still, no matter how sharp Orochimaru was, he could only guess that she had shifted perspectives again. There was no way he could know what she had actually seen.
That's right. Tsunade had just been thinking that since her counterpart in this world was preparing to join forces with other ninja villages to deal with Shiromo's group, she ought to keep an eye on things. If any critical intelligence surfaced, it needed to be transmitted immediately.
So she shifted perspectives once more.
And what did she see?
Her counterpart had supposedly been planning to contact the other villages. Yet after delegating the communication tasks, she herself did absolutely nothing.
Seriously? Were both versions of her across the two worlds lazy bum?
Then something even more horrifying happened.
Under the pretense of searching for survivors, this world's Tsunade began rummaging through Konoha's ruins.
Near the bathhouse, [Tsunade] picked up a small cup. After pondering briefly, she revealed a sorrowful expression.
"This is Sakura's… my disciple. I kept telling you to properly learn the Strength of a Hundred Technique, but you wouldn't listen. All you ever thought about was your 'abundance'… and now look at you."
Clearly, this Limited Tsukuyomi world's Sakura was still a steel plate.
Perhaps only in the world created by Sunahara Wataru could Sakura ever receive proper respect.
After collecting [Sakura]'s remains, [Tsunade] continued searching.
A few minutes later, [Tsunade] delightedly found a large cup, still wrapped in netting.
"Wonderful! This is Hinata's! I'll transplant it onto myself!"
Smack.
Tsunade couldn't bear to watch any longer.
Konoha in this world might as well be destroyed.
The world really needed more good Akatsuki organizations.
Below, at the Takigakure waterfall.
Fū was being washed by the cascading water while Uchiha Hikari extracted the Tailed Beast from a distance.
The process was nearly complete.
Everything was proceeding smoothly.
"This has probably been the easiest one yet. The Jinchūriki was fully cooperative, and the only resistance came from a bunch of femboy Taki ninjax who barely had any chakra."
Shiromo sighed.
"Mm, yes."
Uchiha Hikari lowered her raised hand. It was finished.
"Eh? Now that I think about it, wasn't that old man in the village who hands out money originally from Takigakure? Could it be that he also…"
Hikari suddenly remembered that Kakuzu had been a Taki ninja. Even if he was a rogue ninja, with this world's Yin Maiden Water being an entire waterfall, wouldn't he have had to pass through it when defecting?
Did that mean this world's Kakuzu was also a femboy?
"Kakuzu is a normal person."
[Konan] noticed the curiosity and concern in Hikari's eyes and calmly explained.
"Kakuzu possesses the secret technique Earth Grudge Fear. He has five hearts…"
"I know that one. It's quite an evil technique. By taking other people's hearts, he gains their corresponding chakra attributes. Five hearts, five chakra natures."
Hikari continued.
"That's not all."
[Konan] shook her head slightly.
"The five hearts granted Kakuzu a margin for error. When he crossed the waterfall, only one of his hearts turned into a femboy."
"The current Kakuzu possesses five genders, so there's no need to worry about him becoming like these Taki ninja."
[Kakuzu] possesses five genders.
Shiromo was speechless.
He really wanted to know what Kakuzu's other genders were.
An attack helicopter? A Walmart shopping bag?
And [Konan] still called him a "normal person." Was that a complete redefinition of the term?
"Actually, Takigakure, Kakuzu, and our Akatsuki leader Nagato share a rather unknown piece of history."
"I just searched through Takigakure's historical records, and I finally understand."
[Konan] seemed to undergo a brief internal struggle before speaking slowly.
Well now… one might have thought that since [Konan] didn't even know the Yin Maiden Water was a waterfall, she wouldn't know much about Takigakure, meaning no bizarre lore today.
Who would've guessed that a serious [Konan] could fabricate history on the spot?
Even innovating upon existing records?
Thump thump.
Nagato in the audience seats felt alarm bells ringing wildly in his mind.
He screamed internally: 'Konan, stop talking!!!'
Unfortunately, this world's Konan was more than happy to share information.
"Back then, Takigakure's leadership assigned Kakuzu a secret mission: assassinate Senju Hashirama."
"Kakuzu was very clever. He planned to lure Hashirama to Takigakure's waterfall and use its power to turn Hashirama into a femboy while weakening his chakra."
"However, he underestimated the battle experience of a Warring States-era ninja."
"Hashirama didn't fall for it. Even Kakuzu's backup plan, directly using Water Release to manipulate the Yin Maiden Water into attacking Hashirama, was blocked by Wood Release."
Hashirama laughed loudly and remarked that Uchiha Madara had once urinated in a river. Afterward, Tobirama arrived and splashed Madara's face with Water Release using that very river water."
"After witnessing something like that, how could Hashirama possibly fall for such tricks again?"
"However, while Hashirama could resist, the subordinate who accompanied him could not."
"After returning, that subordinate noticed he was becoming increasingly like a girl. Terrified, he sought out Takigakure again, hoping for an antidote."
"Naturally, Yin Maiden Water has no antidote. So Kakuzu transplanted a purple bow onto him."
"That person was a male member of the Uzumaki clan. He later changed his name to Uzumaki Mito and married Senju Hashirama."
"After discovering the love triangle between Hashirama, Madara, and the Nine-Tails, Uzumaki Mito, in despair, passed on the Tailed Beast, left behind the purple bow containing the Nine-Tails, and departed Konoha."
"Having lost the purple bow, Uzumaki Mito reverted to being male. After the Valley of the End, Madara faked his death and escaped. To extend his lifespan, he came here and drank the Yin Maiden Water, becoming a femboy."
"However, upon transforming, Madara lost most of his power. A Takigakure ninja attempting to research Earth Grudge Fear captured him as an experimental subject and transplanted the purple bow onto him."
"In the end, Uchiha Madara (female) and Uzumaki Mito (male) united, giving birth to Nagato's mother."
"You are not allowed to insult Madara!"
Hashirama, who had been happily watching the drama unfold, suddenly exploded in rage.
(End of this chapter)