Chapter 148: Ice WitchThe battle by the Great Holy Spring had evolved into an incredibly absurd and tragic jelly brawl.The giant purple Slime, Hans, was venting five days of pent-up rage.His tentacles, as thick as millstones, flailed wildly, sending splashes of strong acid Slime raining down upon everyone.As the culprit behind the water purification over the past few days, Aqua naturally became Hans's primary target."Waaaah! Don't chase me! You disgusting lump of purple snot!"Aqua lifted her soaked goddess dress and ran through the pile of rocks like a rabbit chased by a wild dog.Several tentacles whipped heavily against her back, making a dull thudding sound. An ordinary Adventurer would have fractured their bones, but this Intellectual Disabled Goddess, relying on her off-the-charts physical stats, ran so fast she left a blur while wailing at the top of her lungs.Meanwhile, Dust, suspended in mid-air, was about to turn into a Slime-flavored sausage.His leather armor was corroded with countless holes, and his entire body was wrapped in Slime, leaving only his head exposed as he let out a desperate plea for help:"Haru! Kazuma! What the hell are you two bastards doing! I feel like my butt is about to be digested!"Turning our gaze to the edge of the battlefield—behind a crooked tree a full fifty meters away from Hans, Haru and Kazuma were maintaining a surprising level of synchronization, necks hunched, heads popping out in perfect unison to observe the battle."Hey, Kazuma." Haru smeared some acid-proof oil he'd found somewhere onto his staff, eyeing him askance. "Aren't you the self-proclaimed most promising Thief in Axel? Shouldn't you be using [Lurk] and then [Backstab] into that guy's core right now? What are you doing hiding in the back with a squishy magic-user like me?""Ha? What kind of nonsense are you babbling?" Kazuma retorted indignantly, shrinking even further behind the tree trunk. "This is called strategic flanking cover! Besides, as the 'brains' of the party, I must stay in the rear to ensure that you, our only commander, don't get accidentally swallowed by that purple jelly! I'm protecting you, get it? Protecting you!""I think you just want to use me as a meat shield!"Haru rolled his eyes and casually slapped away a drop of Slime that splashed over.Not far away, Megumin was standing on a towering rock, with an ominous red light beginning to condense at the tip of her staff.However, Hans was clearly extremely wary of this Crimson Demon Clan brat. Whenever Meguminbegan chanting that long, winded chuunibyou incantation, Hans would accurately spit out a mouthful of thick, strong acid, forcing Megumin to roll around on the ground, hugging her staff."Damn it! What's up with that guy's dynamic vision!" Megumin climbed up from the ground, covered in dirt, her pointed hat askew. "Haru! Create a three-second… no, five-second vacuum for me! Just five seconds, and I can send him into total oblivion!"Haru looked at Aqua, who was being whipped around by tentacles, and Darkness, who was nearly entering a state of zen, and knew he couldn't slack off anymore."Kazuma, stop playing dead. Use your [Create Water] in combination with Aqua's Holy Water to create a Holy Water swamp for that guy. I'll go rescue Dust and mark that guy's core while I'm at it.""Tch, what a pain." Although Kazuma complained, his eyes became sharp. "I'm stating this in advance: if I get swallowed, make sure to have Aqua resurrect me, and keep all my underwear intact!""Don't worry, if you die, you'll get to see Goddess Eris one more time than I do!"The battlefield by the Great Holy Spring had completely turned into a chaotic nightmare.Thick purple liquid surged outward constantly, and white smoke from the strong acid rose under the moonlight.Darkness was already half-submerged in Hans's gelatinous body, and the sounds coming from her mouth were no longer screams, but a strange moan that made one want to call the police.Aqua, like a punctured balloon, ran wildly around the spring, constantly releasing inaccurate water magic, turning the surroundings into a large water park.Haru was crouching under the crooked tree behind Kazuma, squinting his eyes as he tried to find the core within Hans's massive, semi-transparent body.Suddenly, his pupils constricted. Deep within that constantly writhing purple mass, he saw something extremely out of place—it was a patched, earthy-yellow farmer's shirt, and next to it floated half of a tattered straw sandal."Hey, Kazuma, look at that!" Haru grabbed Kazuma's collar and pointed at Hans's flank. "That's not Adventurer gear, right? That is… that is the clothing of the villagers from nearby!"Kazuma followed his gaze, and his previously mocking expression froze instantly. "Tch, this bastard… not only is he poisoning the water, but he also just ate the passing villagers?"Wiz, who had been trembling behind the two of them, stiffened when she heard the word "villagers."Her amber eyes, which had originally been full of timidity and gentleness, ignited with a cold, ghostly blue fire in that instant.She looked where Haru was pointing, and when she saw the tattered shirt, the temperature of the surrounding air dropped abruptly, and a thick layer of white frost instantly condensed on the grass beneath her feet."Mr. Hans." Wiz's voice no longer trembled; it had become as cold and biting as an eternal glacier.She stood up slowly and hovered in mid-air, her once-tame long hair dancing wildly under the agitation of her magic power:"I once said that even if I left the Demon Kings Army, as long as you do not actively harm innocent ordinary people, I will maintain absolute neutrality…"Hans was busy chasing Aqua and let out a disdainful snort upon hearing this:"Ha? Wiz, are you still spouting such naive nonsense? In front of the great Demon Kings Army, these lowly bugs are nothing more than nutrients to replenish moisture! Are you going to attack me for the sake of these few ants?""Adventurers fight for reward and fame; they are prepared to sacrifice themselves, so I can stand by and watch." Wiz extended her fair palm, and countless ice crystals rapidly gathered above it, forming a deep blue staff radiating an aura of death. "However, those ordinary people who are just trying to survive… are absolutely not consumables that you can trample on at will! Since you have broken the contract, then… please disappear from here forever!""Cursed Ice Crystal Prison!!!"With Wiz's angry shout, dozens of giant ice pillars burst from the ground, instantly piercing Hans's massive body and fixing it in mid-air.The once arrogant poisonous Slime let out a shrill scream. The strong acid, capable of corroding steel, was directly frozen into purple ice blocks in the face of Wiz's off-the-charts ice magic!"Waaaah! Wiz is angry! So scary!" Aqua was so scared she shrank directly behind Haru. "Haru, Haru! That look in Wiz's eyes… she wouldn't happen to purify me along with him, would she?!"Haru looked at Wiz in the sky, radiating the pressure of an Ice Witch, swallowed hard, and turned to Kazuma:"Kazuma, I take back what I said earlier. Wiz… is definitely the one person in this party you absolutely cannot provoke. Let's go pay back those debts we owe her first thing tomorrow morning; I'm afraid I won't live long enough otherwise."Kazuma nodded frantically, clutching the piece of Hans's tentacle he had stolen:"Agreed! Absolutely agreed! But… since Wiz has frozen him, Megumin! Hurry! Now's your chance!"
Chapter 149: The End of ExplosionThe air around the Great Holy Spring seemed to be drained at this moment, leaving behind only a heavy, suffocating magical pressure.Wiz's icicles remained firmly pinned into Hans's massive body, while Hans let out a pig-like wail, desperately trying to break free from the freezing curse.Just then, Megumin, standing on the highest rock, felt her red left eye suddenly erupt with an unprecedented crimson radiance.Her petite figure appeared extremely prominent amidst the violent magical turbulence, and her pitch-black cloak snapped like a great banner in the wind.Having learned of the innocent farmer's tragic death, the Crimson Demon Clan girl, who usually only cared about looking cool, now had a face filled with genuine murderous intent and rage."Darker than black, deeper than the abyss of Darkness, the crimson shadow..." Megumin's voice was no longer crisp, but carried a low resonance as if from an ancient wilderness. "The moment of awakening has arrived, fall into the realm of absurd logic, and manifest as an invisible distortion!""Hey, Haru..." Kazuma swallowed his saliva and subconsciously shrank behind Haru. "Isn't this spell... a bit too long this time? And why are all the stones around here floating into the sky? Is this really the Megumin we know who only sets off fireworks every day?"Haru also felt a chill down his spine as he stared fixedly at the space above Megumin's head that was collapsing crazily:"Stop talking nonsense! Megumin is pouring all her pent-up frustration and anger from these past few days into this one shot! This scale of magic... if she misses, we, along with this Alcanretia, will probably be wiped off the map!""Violent forest, shattered void!" Megumin's long hair fluttered in the red light as she pointed her staff sharply at the core of Hans, who was frozen into an ice block, her speech speed suddenly accelerating. "With this scorching red, burn away the body of sin! At this final moment, witness the true meaning of destruction!"Hans felt the terrifying heat that could even vaporize his soul, and his giant compound eyes were filled with despair:"No! Wait! I am a Demon Kings Army General! I can tell you the Demon King's weakness! I can give you money! Wiz, save me! That red-eyed brat is crazy! She's really going to kill me!"Wiz just looked at him coldly and clenched her right hand, causing the icicles to thicken even more:"Mr. Hans, please repent to that farmer in the ashes.""Crimson that penetrates all things, the end of explosion!" Megumin let out a final roar, and the entire sky was dyed blood-red in that instant. "Explosion!!!"A massive dark red beam of light, fully ten meters in diameter, descended from the sky, accompanied by a roar capable of tearing space apart, ruthlessly piercing through Hans's core.Before the smoke and dust had even dispersed, only a scorched giant pit with a diameter of tens of meters remained where the Great Holy Spring had been, and at the bottom of the pit, some residual purple jelly-like substance could faintly be seen hissing as it melted under the high temperature.After releasing that [Explosion] which had poured out all her strength and anger, Meguminlooked like a dehydrated rag, sprawled in a star shape on the edge of the giant pit, muttering unconsciously:"Huff... huff... My name is... Megumin... the strongest... huff...""Hey, Haru, look down there!" Kazuma brushed the dust off his body while pointing at the densely squirming lights on the mountain road in the distance, his voice tinged with a chill. "The commotion from that blast was just too big. The reaction speed of these Axis Cultists is faster than flies smelling shit!"Just as Kazuma said, the residents of Alcanretia—those lunatics who would stop at nothing to recruit people during the day—were now rushing up, holding torches, carrying kitchen knives, and some even in their pajamas.Leading them was a receptionist uncle, who pointed at the scorched spring with a face full of flesh, letting out a heart-rending howl:"Blasphemy! This is naked blasphemy! Who is it?! Who set off such a big firecracker in Lady Aqua's bathtub?!"In an instant, over a hundred cultists had surrounded the edge of the giant pit.They looked at the disheveled Haru and his group, then at the destroyed Holy Spring, their eyes filled not with fear, but with a fanatical rage."It's them! I recognize that black-haired brat; he was sneaking around cleaning the ground in the city during the day!""And that Crimson Demon Clan brat! It must have been her who set the bomb! No one else but those Crimson Demon Clan people with heads full of explosions could do this kind of destruction!""Pay up! Not only for the repairs to the Holy Spring, but also for the emotional distress of us not being able to take a hot bath tonight! At least one million eris per person!"Haru looked at this group of completely unreasonable believers, his eye twitching violently.He pointed at the un-melted Slime residue at the bottom of the pit and argued loudly:"Everyone! Please calm down! We just eliminated Hans, a Demon Kings Army General who was lurking in the city! That guy was a poisonous Slime; if it weren't for us, your hot spring water tomorrow would have turned into deadly poison!"However, the brain circuits of these Axis Cultistswere clearly different from normal people.An old woman jumped out, pointed at Haru's nose, and cursed:"Demon Kings Army General? Who cares about such a trivial matter! Even if the Demon King came to poison us himself, Lady Aqua would purify it with Holy Water! But you blew up the spring! Where are we going to recruit people tomorrow?! Without the hot spring, who would come to travel to Alcanretia?!""That's right! The Demon Kings Army only wants to kill people, you guys are trying to cut off our livelihood! You are even more evil than the Demon Kings Army!""Hey! You heartless bastards!" Aqua finally couldn't take it anymore. She jumped out from behind Haru, hands on her hips, trembling with anger. "I am the very goddess, Lady Aqua, whom you worship! I was chased half a mountain by that disgusting Slime just to protect you! How dare you say such things to me?!"The scene fell into a momentary dead silence.The cultists looked at each other, then erupted into mocking laughter even more intense than before."Huh? You're a goddess? Then I'm eris!""The scammers these days are getting less and less professional, trying to impersonate Lady Aqua to avoid paying compensation?""Don't listen to her! This blue-haired female lunatic was performing spitting-purification tricks in the fountain during the day; she must be a heretic who is crazy for fame! Catch them and send them to the city's confession room for three days and three nights!""Haru..." Kazuma silently placed his hand on the hilt of his sword, his eyes dead. "I've had enough. This city is hopeless, really hopeless. Let's just blow these guys up too. Since Hans is dead anyway, how about we just run back to Axel?"Haru looked at the approaching cultists, then at Aqua, who was already aggrieved and preparing to cry for the second time, and Megumin, who hadn't regained consciousness yet, and took a deep breath.Just as Haru's hand reached for his staff, preparing to use a weak [Lurk] to create a smoke screen to help everyone run away, Darkness, who had been keeping her head down with her shoulders trembling violently, suddenly took a big step forward.Her golden Crusader armor shone with a light of overflowing justice in the torchlight, but if one looked closely, they could see that the young lady's cheeks were already red enough to bleed, and her eyes even carried a kind of fanatical "ready to die" (referring to satisfying her desires) look.
Chapter 150: What Did She Do?"Stop! You bunch of... you bunch of rude, fanatical, completely unreasonable Axis Cultists!" Darkness's voice echoed in the night sky, carrying the unique dignity of a cleric, yet tinged with a slight tremor due to excessive excitement. "That's right! As you can see, I am a Crusader serving the goddess eris! Everything tonight... whether it was the explosion at the holy spring or the chaos here, was planned and executed by me alone! It has nothing to do with my companions!"The whole scene fell into deathly silence again, and then, the Axis Cultists erupted with a wave of hostility even more terrifying than before."What?! She's actually a follower of that padded-chest goddess?!""I knew it! Only those hypocritical followers of eriswould do something as disgusting as throwing a bomb into someone else's bathtub!""Did everyone hear that? She admitted it! This woman with a hot body but a wicked mind admitted it!"The receptionist uncle pushed through the crowd and stepped forward, clutching an application form for joining the cult tightly, staring fiercely at Darkness:"Alright! Since you've admitted it, don't blame us for being impolite! According to the laws of Alcanretia, those who desecrate the holy spring must be locked in the darkest, dampest, and most Axis Order-doctrine-filled confession room in the city! We will make you kneel in front of the image of Lady Aquafor three days and three nights, and during that time, you will listen to us recite the 'Quotes of Lady Aqua' and 'How to Correctly Pitch Enrollment Applications to Neighbors' without stopping!""Ugh...! Kneel, kneel for three days and three nights... and be subjected to non-stop mental indoctrination..." Darkness's slender neck tilted back slightly, and an irrepressible, pleasure-filled moan escaped her throat. "Ah... this is truly... what a harsh and undignified punishment... Come! Hurry and humiliate me with your biased doctrines! Even if you parade me through the streets as a typical heretic, I... I will absolutely not yield!""Hey, Darkness! What are you talking about!" Harufelt his scalp tingle and hurriedly reached out to grab her cape. "Don't play out your fetishes at a time like this! Those lunatics will actually lock you up! Kazuma, help me out!""Don't pull her, Haru." Kazuma stood there with dead fish eyes, coldly watching the expression on Darkness's face, which looked like she was about to ascend to heaven on the spot. "Look at her. Does she look like a victim in need of rescue? She's more like an explorer who has finally found her paradise. Let's just let her be. Besides, no one in this city can beat her anyway; the most she'll suffer is a bit of ear pain...""Stand down! Haru! Kazuma!" Darkness violently shook off Haru's hand. When she turned her head, a kind of extremely scum-like resolve was hidden beneath her dignified expression. "This is self-redemption as a knight... no, as a sinner! You take Megumin and Aqua and leave first; I will bear this alone! No matter what they do to me... no matter how excessive, no matter how unspeakable the things are... I will silently endure it all alone!"Having said that, she actually took the initiative to stretch out her hands, signaling the cultists to tie her up with ropes."Take her away! Take this despicable follower of eristo the confession room!" Following the order of the receptionist uncle, hundreds of cultists cheered and swarmed up, lifting Darkness like a sacrificial pig and walking towards the city center.Haru and Kazuma stood at the edge of the giant crater, watching Darkness being pushed and shoved in the crowd while wearing a happy smile, and then looked at Aqua, who was still drawing circles on the ground nearby, and Megumin, who had already started snoring on her back."Haru."Kazuma spoke faintly."Yeah.""Should we... take advantage of the chaos to go retrieve the proof of the bounty Hans left behind, and then rent a carriage overnight to escape back to Axel?""Although it's very inhumane, I completely agree with your suggestion." Haru wiped the cold sweat off his face. "But before that, we have to pull Aquaout of her cultist-induced PTSD, otherwise she might sit in that crater forever."The morning sunlight filtered through the exotic window lattices of Alcanretia, spilling onto the slightly worn carpet of the inn.After the big chaotic battle the previous night that was enough to shave ten years off their lives, Haruand Kazuma were currently sleeping on the sofa with no regard for their image.And Aqua had gone out early in the morning.It wasn't until near noon that the inn door was pushed open.Darkness walked in, surrounded by several Axis Cultists.Surprisingly, this young lady was not exhausted after being abused; instead, she was glowing, her steps were light, and even her heavy Crusaderarmor was polished until it shone."Everyone! I'm back!" Darkness's voice carried an indescribable sense of satisfaction. "Although the doctrinal baptism in the confession room was indeed very... ahem, very harsh, the truth finally came to light. The ice crystal residue left by Miss Wiz last night was found to contain traces of a poisonous Slime. The cult has already confirmed Hans's death."The leading cultist uncle also bowed to Haru and Kazuma with an embarrassed look on his face:"We are truly very sorry! Brave Adventurers. We were too impulsive last night and misunderstood you all. To express our apologies, the Archpriest has ordered that all your food, lodging, and hot spring expenses in Alcanretia will be waived! Please enjoy our city's hospitality to the fullest!""Waived?!" Kazuma sat up from his dying dream, his eyes shining like two eris gold coins. "Can we soak in that expensive mixed hot spring whenever we want? And that limited-time set meal with high-grade magic materials?!"After receiving an affirmative reply, Haru and Kazuma high-fived to celebrate and were just about to wake up Megumin, who was still sleeping, to go have a big meal.However, just as the happy atmosphere reached its peak, several other Axis Cultists rushed into the inn.They were sweating profusely, looking terrified, whispering to the leading uncle, and occasionally glancing at Haru and the others with the eyes of someone looking at a harbinger of disaster.The leading uncle's face turned from rosy to iron-blue, and then from iron-blue to a near-desperate pale.He turned his head tremblingly, looking at Haru, who was about to pick up the menu, his tone stiff as if he were reciting his last words:"That... Mr. Lin Jin, and Mr. Kazuma. May I ask... that blue-haired lunatic with conspicuous long blue hair, wearing a purple miniskirt, who claims to be the goddess Aqua herself... is she your teammate?"The air froze instantly.Haru's hand reaching for the menu froze in mid-air, and Kazuma's smile gradually disappeared."Maybe..." Haru swallowed with difficulty. "What... what did she do?"
Chapter 151: The Wealthiest Hidden Billionaire in the Entire OtherworldThe receptionist's face twitched violently. In his eyes, which were originally filled with apology, a fury more lethal than Hans' deadly poison was now burning.He slammed the table suddenly, causing the inn's teacups to rattle and hum."'Maybe so!' Mr. Lin Jin, please face reality!" the man let out a desperate roar. "Just now, screams came from every hot spring inn in the city! Those premium hot spring waters that were supposed to be rich in minerals, capable of beautifying the skin and healing all illnesses... after that blue-haired lunatic jumped in to bathe, they all... they all turned into pure water so clear you can see the bottom, water you could use directly to brew tea!"Several cultists nearby also showed expressions as if they had lost their parents. One of them even knelt on the ground, clutching the carpet and shouting:"That was the lifeblood of our Alcanretia! Who on earth is that woman? Hans of the Demon King's Army spent months and couldn't completely purify the water source, yet she completely bankrupted the city's hot spring industry in just half an afternoon! She's the real Demon King, isn't she?!"Haru looked at this group of cultists who were about to go berserk, cold sweat pouring down his sideburns.He quietly took a step back. The hand that had originally wanted to pull Kazuma along for a big meal instantly turned to point toward the main gate, his tone as firm as if he were taking an oath:"Wait a minute! I think everyone has truly misunderstood!" Haru said with a face full of righteousness. "Actually... we aren't familiar with that blue-haired woman at all! She's just a hobo claiming to be a performance artist we picked up on the side of the road. We only let her join us temporarily to get a meal because we felt sorry for her. We never expected her mental stress to be so high that she would commit such anti-social behavior!""Exactly, exactly!" Kazuma reacted extremely quickly, immediately putting on a look of deep distress. "We are victims too! She even stole and drank my premium Bubbly Wine yesterday! This blue cancer that destroys public property should be executed by everyone! Fellow believers, please issue a wanted poster immediately. We are willing to provide detailed physical characteristics, such as key clues like her looking very low in intelligence and crying very loudly!"The cultists were stunned by Haru and Kazuma's textbook-level betrayal of their teammate.The leading man gave them a suspicious look, then waved his hand:"Fine! Since you've drawn a clear line, we'll search the whole city! We absolutely cannot let that demon who turned the hot springs into plain water escape! Everyone, charge!"Watching the large group of cultists rush out of the inn brandishing torches and membership applications, Haru's group exchanged a look. They tacitly hoisted the still-drooling Megumin onto their backs, grabbed the regretful-looking Darkness—who was sad she couldn't stay locked up—and slipped out the back door in a flash.Half an hour later, by a secluded public spring on the outskirts of the city.Haru finally found that blue demon.Aqua was seen with her sleeves rolled up, standing in the center of the spring with a holy (and punchable) expression, her hands continuously emitting a soft blue light.The originally steaming, sulfur-scented hot spring was rapidly becoming crystal clear and transparent under her touch."He-yah! Purify!" Aqua wiped the sweat from her forehead and showed a proud smile. "There, no problem now! This water source is also completely purified! I really am a genius goddess. This kind of work efficiency is something even that little girl eriscould never achieve!""A-QUA!" Haru rushed up with gritted teeth and grabbed her by the back of the collar. "What are you doing?! Do you know that the cultists all over the city are looking for you with knives?!"Aqua's eyes rolled back as she was choked, and she turned her head with a look of grievance:"Waaah! Haru, why are you being so mean! I'm disinfecting the whole city! Wasn't that Hans a poisonous Slime? What if there's still some residual toxin in the water and my followers get sick? I worked so hard running to every spring in the city just to ensure no toxin remained! You should be praising me!"Kazuma looked at the spring that had turned into pure water and covered his face in despair:"You idiot... the reason hot springs are hot springs is because of the impurities in them! If you purify all the impurities, doesn't it just become ordinary bathwater?! Our right to eat for free... our deluxe meals... all washed away by your 'disinfection'!"On the streets of Alcanretia, the light of torches flickered everywhere, and the fanatical and angry shouts of the Axis Cultists rose and fell.Haru firmly covered Aqua's mouth as she tried to argue that she 'really did it for everyone's good,' and led the group through the dark alleys while crouching low."Kazuma, we definitely can't take a carriage. Those lunatics are checking vehicles at the city gate right now. If they see anyone with blue hair or who looks low in intelligence, they'll be dragged off to fill a hole!" Haru lowered his voice, his tone carrying a hint of relief at having survived. "Wiz! Wiz, where are you? Come out and save us!"At the end of the alley, Wiz, who had been shivering in the shadows, finally poked her head out. The lich shopkeeper looked weaker than ever, but her eyes were filled with fear of those crazy cultists: "—M-Mr. Lin Jin! I'm here! I was almost caught by them just now too. They said I was a remnant of the Demon King's Army... Although I actually am, the way they looked at me like I was a pest was really scary, boohoo...""Stop talking, Wiz!" Kazuma grabbed her shoulders urgently. "Quick! Use [Teleport]! Anywhere is fine, as long as we can leave this damn Water City. I'll even accept sleeping on straw in the Axelstables!"Wiz nodded and, forcing out the last of her mana, drew a complex teleportation circle on the ground:"Everyone, please step inside! The destination is... in front of the Axel city gates!"With a flash of blinding light, Haru, Kazuma, Aqua, Megumin, and a regretful-looking Darkness (who was sad she wasn't publicly executed) instantly vanished from the spot.Less than five minutes after they left, an old man wearing ornate priest robes with a nearly pathological wisdom in his eyes—the High Priest of the Axis Order, Jestar—slowly walked to the fountain Aqua had purified. Behind him followed a group of inn owners who were getting ready to pack up and leave.Jestar reached out a trembling hand, scooped up a handful of crystal-clear pure water, and took a small sip.The entire area went dead silent. Everyone was waiting for the High Priest to issue the order to put a continent-wide bounty on that blue-haired lunatic.However, Jestar's expression gradually shifted from confusion to shock, and finally into a nearly ecstatic joy."This... this isn't pure water at all!" Jestar let out a roar like thunder, startling the surrounding cultists into kneeling. "This is the highest grade of Holy Water! It is the Tears of God, containing pure holy mana that could instantly vaporize a high-level demon! This purity... this taste... that blue-haired girl, she isn't some lunatic. She is Lady Aqua herself, whom we long for day and night, descending to the mortal realm!""Wha-What?!" The receptionist uncle, who had been cursing just a moment ago, was dumbfounded. "But she just wanted to tear down the statue...""That was the Goddess testing our loyalty! She was displeased that our statue wasn't beautiful enough!" Jestar stood up abruptly, a shrewd businessman's glint in his eyes."Pass down the order! Stop the search immediately! Announce to the public that the hot springs are undergoing a 'Goddess's Blessing' style upgrade! Starting tomorrow, Alcanretia will no longer sell hot springs; we will sell Lady Aqua's Holy Bath Water! A small bottle will go for ten thousand eris! Also, send a few capable High Priests to Axel in secret to ensure the Goddess's quality of life. As for the proceeds from the Holy Water... open a secret account for the Goddess and secretly wire a portion to her every month. Don't let her know it's from us, otherwise, with the Goddess's personality, she'll surely squander it all in an instant!"And so, as Haru and the others fled back to Axel in a sorry state, they didn't know that the penniless Intellectual Disabled Goddess had actually become the wealthiest hidden billionaire in the entire otherworld.
Chapter 152: The Top-Secret Final Order Brought by MimiThe familiar scent of Axel's Cabbage and the noisy background chatter of Adventurers finally allowed Haru's nerves, which had been tense for the entire journey, to relax.This sense of tranquility, filled with the aura of low-level losers, felt like heaven after the baptism by those lunatics in the Water City."Ah, I'm back to life! I swear, unless the Demon King himself attacks, I don't want to step foot in Alcanretia ever again for the rest of my life!" Kazuma stretched without any regard for his image, then tossed the pack on his back to the ground and waved at Dust, "Hey, Dust, why are you running so fast? We haven't split the bounty yet!"Dust waved his hand without looking back, his pace so fast it was as if he were treading on the wind:"That can wait until tomorrow! I sense it... there must be an extremely urgent quest waiting for me on the guild's bulletin board! Or perhaps some kind of special mission involving skimpy clothing and sweet dreams is calling me! See ya later, everyone!""Tch, that guy is definitely going to the Succubus Shop." Haru shook his head helplessly and turned to look at the three problem children and the one sensible person, Yunyun, behind him. "Let's go, back to the mansion. It might have gathered quite a bit of Dust, but it's better than sleeping out in the wild."Everyone dragged their tired bodies through the familiar streets, turned a few corners, and that grand yet somehow consistently comical mansion finally appeared at the end of their sight.However, before Haru could even pull the key from his pocket, Megumin, who was walking in front, suddenly let out a cry of surprise, her entire body freezing in place as if a paralysis spell had been cast on her."Mi... Mimi?!"Haru followed Megumin's gaze and saw a little girl about eight or nine years old sitting in front of the mansion's heavy carved door. She was wearing the characteristic small cape of the Crimson Demon Clan and had her hair in twin tails.She looked remarkably like Megumin, especially those large, intelligent red eyes, which were currently sizing up the returning group with curiosity.In the little girl's arms, she was death-gripping a pitch-black cat with a red cross crest on its forehead and a pair of tiny wings.The cat was trying to escape the little girl's clutches with a look of pure disdain, but it was only being held tighter."Sister!" Seeing Megumin, the little girl named Mimi's eyes lit up. She jumped up and ran over so fast that the black cat in her arms was flung into the air. It let out an extremely half-hearted "Meow—" before landing steadily on Haru's head."Waaa! Mimi, why are you here?!" Megumin grabbed her sister who had rushed over, speaking as fast as if she were chanting a spell, "Where are Mom and Dad? Did something happen in the village? Has the Demon King's Army attacked? Or did you beg your way here because you were too hungry?!"Mimi looked up, revealing an extremely bright (and ominous) smile:"No, Sister. Dad said that because Sister keeps bragging in her letters about living a lavish life with a harem of wives and concubines in Axel, the people in the village decided to organize a Crimson Demon Village Tour Group. I'm just here on behalf of everyone to inspect Sister's big house first!"Haru felt the black cat named Dounosuke on his head gently patting his hairline with its paws, and his heart skipped a beat."Tour group?" Haru turned stiffly to look at Megumin, "Megumin, what exactly did you write home in those letters? What do you mean by 'harem of wives and concubines'? And, does 'inspect' mean... is a massive crowd of Crimson Demons currently heading this way?!"Aqua also leaned in at this point, curiously poking Mimi's rosy cheeks:"Hey, this kid is really cute, she looks way smarter than Megumin. Hey, little girl, did you bring any money? If you can donate a bit to the Axis Order, big sister will bless you to grow up even more well-endowed than your sister.""Stay away from my sister, you blue cultist!"Megumin let out a protective roar.Haru quickly picked up the black cat Dounosuke, which was trying to nest in his hair. The little fellow let out a very perfunctory meow and then hung obediently from Haru's finger.Meanwhile, Mimi nuzzled into Megumin's embrace and then pulled out a crumpled letter from the inside of her small cape, which even had some suspected dried sweet potato crumbs stuck to it."Oh, right, Sister! This is the top-secret final order Dad told me to hand to you personally. He said if this letter doesn't reach your hands, the Crimson Demon Village might turn into eternal Dust under tonight's moonlight."Mimi puffed out her little chest with a serious face, but combined with her youthful features, she looked like she was just playing a ninja game.Megumin took the envelope with trembling hands. On it, in extremely flashy and chuunibyou gold-leaf font, was written:[To: My beloved daughter who walks the path of destruction, the Ruler of Axel, the Lord of Explosions, Megumin]."Ruler? Lord of Explosions?" Kazuma leaned over, offering a dead-eyed retort, "Megumin, just how many layers of beauty filters did you put on the letters you wrote home? Should we go to the guild and apply for a name change now, so your family doesn't find out you're just a human accessory who needs to be carried after firing one shot a day?""Shut up, Kazuma! That was just a little bit of artistic processing to put my parents' minds at ease!"Megumin retorted with a flushed face, then hurriedly tore open the letter.However, as she read further, Megumin's face, which had been blushing, instantly turned deathly pale, and even the wizard hat on her head began to quiver slightly due to its owner's trembling."How is this possible... the Crimson Demon Village... has actually been..."Seeing this, Haru took the letter from Megumin's hand and read it aloud:"My daughter Megumin: By the time you read this letter, the Crimson Demon Village is on the brink of an unprecedented collapse. A Demon King's Army General, leading an army of monsters capable of devouring everything, has surrounded the village. Although we Crimson Demons possess the strongest magic, the village's rations are down to the last three sweet potatoes, and your mother is currently dueling the neighbor because she couldn't grab any dried sweet potatoes... Save us! Bring your fabulously wealthy teammates and come back to save your hometown! — Signed: The Crimson Demon Village's Number One Magic Item Craftsman, Hyo Saburo."The air fell into an eerie silence."Um..." Yunyun was on the verge of tears on the side. She grabbed Haru's sleeve, her voice trembling, "A Demon King's Army General... Mr. Lin Jin, we have to go back! If the Crimson Demon Village really disappears, I... I really won't have a single friend left!""Hey, hey, that's not the point!" Kazuma pointed to a certain part of the letter and ranted wildly, "Fabulously wealthy teammates? Megumin, did you tell your family that Haru is a prince traveling incognito from some kingdom, and that I'm the mastermind controlling the world's economy? Also, what's with this sense of crisis over only having three sweet potatoes left? Is this clan facing genocide, or are they just hungry and trying to trick us into going back to cook?!""Regardless, that's a Demon King's Army General!" Darkness took a sudden step forward, her eyes flashing with a strange light that was called a sense of duty but was actually mixed with the anticipation of being ravaged, "As a Crusader of the kingdom, I absolutely cannot sit by and watch the Demon King's Army run rampant in our territory! If it's the Demon King's Army, they'll surely use those tentacled monsters to torture prisoners... Ugh, how despicable! Let's set out!"Aqua, on the other hand, was teasing Mimi with an indifferent face:"Eh? Going back to the Crimson Demon Village? Is there any good wine there? If not, I'm not going to a place full of red-eyed chuunibyou. But... if I can get all those Crimson Demons to convert to the Axis Order, maybe I, the Goddess, really could rule the world, hehehe..."
Haru, holding Dounosuke in his arms, looked at his teammates who had already begun performing various absurd dramas in their minds and let out a deep sigh.He knew that before setting off for the Crimson Demon Village, some things had to be settled first."Alright, alright, stop arguing! Since we've decided to go, we need to make preparations first!" Haruclapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "First, we have to go to the Adventurers Guild to collect Hans's bounty. That's a huge sum of money—enough to buy all the sweet potatoes in the Crimson Demon Village, and even hire a few carriages to transport them."As soon as Kazuma heard the word 'bounty,' his eyes lit up instantly, and all his complaints and grumbling vanished into thin air."Right, right, right! The bounty! I almost forgot about that! We risked our lives for that! Let's go, let's go right now!""Hmph, even if it's a Demon Kings Army General, a crisis that can be solved with money isn't a real crisis!"Megumin crossed her arms, and though her words were tough, a hint of irrepressible anticipation flickered in her eyes."I'm coming too!" Darkness pumped herself up. "Maybe the guild will have more detailed information about the Demon Kings Army; I need to learn about her attack patterns and... weaknesses in advance."Aqua, meanwhile, was completely absorbed in the fun of teasing Mimi."Come here, little cutie. Let Goddess-oneesan see if your eyes glow like Megumin's. Wow, they really do glow! You'll definitely become a great Explosion Magic user in the future, and then you'll use your magic to build the most magnificent cathedral for Lady Goddess, right?"Mimi giggled as Aqua teased her, looking up and responding in a high-pitched, childish voice:"Yeah! I'll use the most powerful Explosion Magic to blow away everyone who doesn't believe in the Goddess Aqua!""Hey! Don't go corrupting the child!"Haru quickly separated Aqua and Mimi. Looking at Mimi's red eyes sparkling with innocent light, a strong protective urge suddenly welled up in his heart.This child was practically a miniature version of Megumin; she was so cute his heart was melting.However, when Kazuma tried to lean in with a look of affection, wanting to pat Mimi's head, Harureflexively shifted his body to block Kazuma's hand."Kazuma, what are you doing?"Haru's tone was slightly wary."I... I just wanted to pat Mimi's head. Look how cute this kid is!"Kazuma looked innocent, but Haru read a dangerous signal in the overly eager look he gave Mimi.After all, Haru had seen Kazuma's special feelings for Megumin with his own eyes.Who knew if this guy would extend his love for Megumin to Mimi and pull some kind of 'raising-type lolicon' stunt?"No! Mimi is still young; you can't just let strangers pat her head!" Haru rejected Kazuma with a righteous air, then took the initiative to pick Mimi up. "Let's go. To the guild first."Mimi stared at Haru curiously as he held her, while Kazuma followed behind with a resentful look on his face, muttering:"What gives? She's just a little loli, right? Is it really necessary to guard against me like I'm a thief? I'm an upright Adventurer!... But Mimi really is cute. Megumin must have been like that when she was little, right?"The Adventurers Guild in Axel was as bustling as ever, the air thick with the mixed scents of ale, sweat, and cheap perfume.Holding Mimi, Haru carefully navigated through the crowded hall and approached the counter."Hello, we're here to collect the bounty for the Hanssubjugation quest." As Haru spoke, he pushed forward a small bag containing Hans's Magic Core Residue.The young receptionist, Miss Luna, took the bag, put on her monocle, and inspected it carefully. The professional smile she always wore suddenly turned into an expression of shock."T-This is... the Magic Core Residue of the Demon Kings Army General, Hans the Deadly Poison Slime! He was actually subjugated?!"Miss Luna couldn't help but raise her voice by an octave, instantly drowning out all the noise in the guild.In an instant, the entire guild fell silent. Every Adventurer's gaze snapped toward Haru and his group.Then, a wave of cheers and applause erupted like a tsunami."Whoa! Great job! A Demon Kings Army General?!""Incredible! These rookies were really hiding their strength!""Heroes! They're heroes!!"Kazuma was lightheaded from this sudden hero treatment. He straightened his back, basking in an unprecedented sense of honor.Amidst the crowd's flattery, he felt as if he truly had become a hero destined to save the world."Hahaha! It was nothing, really! After all, we are... ahem, the strongest Adventurer party!" Kazumawaved his hand with feigned modesty, then slammed the table with grand bravado, shouting to all the Adventurers in the guild, "Come! All the drinks today! All the roast meat! Everything! It's on me, Satou Kazuma! Everyone, drink up! Eat up! It's all you can eat!"The guild erupted again, with cheers and whistles echoing everywhere. Someone even started shouting, "Long live Lord Kazuma!"However, the Tavern Owner—a burly man with a scar on his face—remained unmoved.He wiped a glass in his hand and slowly walked over to Kazuma, a hint of unquestionable shrewdness in his eyes."Kid, those words sound familiar. Last month, a guy named Dust said the same thing. And the result? After everyone finished eating and drinking, he ran off, leaving a pile of unpaid bills." The Tavern Ownersnorted. "Rules are rules. If you want to treat everyone, no problem, but pay up front. That bounty should be enough for you to splurge for a while, right?"Kazuma's face, which had been flushed with pride, instantly froze. He looked at the surrounding Adventurers—who were still cheering but now had 'waiting for the show' expressions—and then at the Tavern Owner's face, which clearly said he wasn't going anywhere without paying."Uh... fine, fine, I'll pay up front!" Kazuma took the bounty bag from Haru's hand with a pained expression and reluctantly counted out a large sum of money to give to the Tavern Owner.As the gold coins clinked into the cash box, a satisfied smile appeared on the Tavern Owner's face."Alright! Everyone! Lord Kazuma is treating! Drink your fill!"The guild erupted in enthusiastic cheers once more.However, the moment Kazuma finished paying, something strange happened.The Adventurers who had been crowding around Kazuma with flattery suddenly dispersed as if by prior agreement, returning to their seats to continue drinking and playing games, as if the generous Lord Kazuma had never existed."Hey! You guys! What's going on?!" Kazuma stood frozen in place, watching the Adventurers who were lively once again, feeling like a tool that had been discarded after use.Holding Mimi, Haru looked at Kazuma's 'life is meaningless' expression and couldn't help but burst out laughing."See? I told you not to get too carried away. In Axel, money is the only thing that talks. As for favors... what are those?"Megumin looked at Kazuma with a face full of disdain."Hmph, you brought this on yourself. Who told you to show off so much?"Darkness, on the side, wore a slightly excited expression."T-This feeling of being discarded after being used... it's wonderful! Kazuma, do you want to go outside the guild with me and let the drunks throw rotten vegetables at us? That would be a great experience too!"Aqua completely ignored Kazuma's plight. She was excitedly competing with Mimi to see who could make the guild's wine glasses cleaner."By the way, Kazuma, this money is being deducted from your assets," Haru reminded him as he took back the money bag.
Chapter 154: A Betrothal Gift Worthy of Entrusting One's Life!As night fell, peace finally returned to the mansion.Exhausted from the day, everyone dispersed to their respective rooms, eager for their long-awaited beds.However, Haru tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep.He eventually decided to throw on a coat and went to the living room alone, sitting before the fireplace and thinking by the faint glow of the fire."Sigh, these days are getting more exciting by the day. So exciting that I'm actually starting to miss my plain and ordinary life from my past world." Harurubbed his temples as the recent events flashed through his mind like a revolving lantern:The Dullahan, the Mobile Fortress Destroyer, the chaos in the Water City, and that distress letter from the Crimson Demon Village.He knew the crisis at the Crimson Demon Villagewas imminent. As it was Megumin and Yunyun's hometown, there was no way he could just sit back and watch."It seems I'm destined to never have a moment's peace until the Demon King's Army is completely wiped out."Haru laughed self-deprecatingly, his gaze inadvertently drifting to Dounosuke, who was dozing in the corner. The black cat was curled into a ball, sleeping soundly.However, the moment Haru withdrew his gaze, he seemed to spot something unusual.A faint spark of fire flashed from Dounosuke's nostrils, accompanied by a slight smell of burning."Huh? Am I seeing things?"Haru blinked and looked at Dounosuke again. The cat was still sleeping like a log, showing no signs of anything abnormal.Just as Haru was doubting whether he was hallucinating from exhaustion, light footsteps came from the stairs.Megumin walked down carrying a sleepy-eyed Mimi, heading toward the bathroom."Haru, why aren't you asleep yet?"Megumin asked with some confusion when she saw Haru sitting in the living room."Oh, it's nothing. I just can't sleep," Haru replied casually. Then, as if suddenly remembering something, he pointed to Dounosuke in the corner. "By the way, Megumin, I think I just saw Dounosuke... breathe fire? Have you ever seen it do that?"Megumin froze for a moment upon hearing this, then gave him a look that said 'what kind of nonsense are you talking?'"Breathe fire? Haru, have you been too tired lately? Dounosuke is just a very weak, very cute, ordinary cat that only knows how to eat, drink, and sleep! How could it possibly breathe fire? That's something only top-tier magical creatures can do. And even if it could, it's my familiar, so why would a person of common sense like you be the one to see it!"Hearing Megumin put it that way, Haru also felt he might have been jumping to conclusions.Indeed, Dounosuke looked like an ordinary black cat. Although it had a strange cross-shaped crest on its forehead, breathing fire... was indeed a bit too far-fetched."You're right. I'm probably just too tired and saw wrong." Haru shook his head with a bitter smile. "You two should go to sleep. We have to head out tomorrow."Megumin, still carrying Mimi, wore an 'I knew it' expression and hummed a little tune as she walked into the bathroom.Haru looked at Dounosuke in the corner again. The black cat seemed to sense his gaze, its ears twitching slightly before it continued its deep slumber.Haru sighed. It seemed he really did need some good rest.In the early morning of Axel, before the mist had even dissipated, Haru was already dragging a sleepy-eyed Kazuma—who was still dreaming of a date with a Succubus—to the entrance of the market."Hey, Haru... *yawn*... why are we buying so many sweet potatoes and dried meat with our own money? Aren't those Crimson Demons supposed to be the strongest mages? Could they really be short on food?" Kazuma yawned while clutching his wallet painfully. "And why aren't we using the public funds? Why do I have to pay? This is my hard-earned money that I scraped together from those money-grubbing Adventurers!"Haru stopped picking through the sweet potatoes and turned around, flashing an extremely sincere and caring smile as he lowered his voice."Kazuma, you don't understand. How can we use public funds for this? This is clearly an investment for you!""Huh? Investment? In those chuunibyou?""Think about it. We're going to Megumin's hometown to meet her parents. In a place as resource-scarce (self-proclaimed) as the Crimson Demon Village, showing up with a mountain of food—what does that make you in the eyes of your father-in-law? It shows sincerity! Financial power! It's a betrothal gift worthy of entrusting a life to!"Haru patted Kazuma's shoulder, his tone becoming increasingly scum-like. "Think about it. When Mr. Hyo Saburo sees how generous you are, he might get swept up in the moment and pin Megumin to the table right then and there, crying and begging you to take her away as a concubine. Then, you'll not only have a legal playmate but also gain a genius Crimson Demon descendant for free. Isn't that a great deal?"Kazuma's eyes instantly widened like copper bells. His mind was already filled with images of Meguminin a wedding dress (or something more revealing) being completely submissive to him. He almost started drooling."You... You're right! Why didn't I think of that! Haru, you really are my brother! What does this little bit of money matter? Boss! This basket, that basket, and that pile over there—I'll take them all! Put it on Satou Kazuma's tab!"Kazuma waved his wallet heroically and even shook Haru's hand with tearful gratitude.Looking at Kazuma's foolish expression—the face of a man being sold who was helping count the money—Haru laughed inwardly.Plan successful. That way, the team's budget is preserved.After the shopping was done, the two pushed a cart full of supplies to that magic item shop that always felt a bit eerie (and poor)—Wizs Magic Item Shop.As they pushed open the door, the wind chime hanging on it gave a crisp ring.Behind the counter, the beautiful Lich Wiz—with her long brown hair, hot figure, and perpetually troubled face—was sighing over a pile of unsellable shoes that made dog barking sounds when people walked."Welcome... Ah, it's Mr. Lin Jin and Mr. Kazuma!" Seeing familiar faces, Wiz immediately gave a gentle smile. "Are you here to buy that magic circle that automatically washes dishes but breaks them? It's twenty percent off right now!""We'll talk about that junk later, Wiz." Haru placed a bag of sweet potatoes on the counter and got straight to the point. "We need to go to the Crimson Demon Village; it's an emergency. Could you please cast a teleportation spell to send our group and this cart of betrothal gifts directly there?"Wiz blinked, wringing her fingers a bit hesitantly."Eh? To the Crimson Demon Village? Teleportation magic can do that... but teleporting such heavy items along with so many people will consume a massive amount of mana... I might need to rest for several days to recover...""Please, Wiz! This concerns the survival of Megumin's hometown and my lifelong happiness!"Kazuma dropped directly into a dogeza kowtow before Wiz, his tone so sincere it could move one to tears.
Chapter 155: Hmm, Very Spirited!Haru looked at Wiz's face, slightly pale from excessive use of magic, and felt a pang of pity in his heart."Wiz, you look tired. How about this: once we get back from the Crimson Demon Village, I'll find a way to help you sell those dishwashers that automatically break bowls, the shoes that bark like dogs, and all that other stuff." Haru patted his chest and promised, "It might be a bit difficult, but at least it'll help clear out your inventory."Hearing this, a surprised smile instantly bloomed on Wiz's troubled face, and a faint blush appeared on her cheeks."Really?! Mr. Lin Jin! Thank you so much! I'll... I'll be waiting for your return!"As she spoke, her eyes were full of anticipation, as if she could already see the grand scene of those unsold magic items being snatched up."Ahem, Wiz, we're still here, you know. Don't just focus on flirting with Haru!" Kazuma muttered dissatisfiedly to the side. He felt like his delusions about dowries were being diluted by the interaction between Haru and Wiz."Alright, Wiz, sorry to trouble you."Haru ignored Kazuma's complaints and signaled to Wiz that she could begin.Wiz took a deep breath, closed her eyes, pressed her hands together, and began chanting a long and complex incantation.Boundless magic power began to gather around her petite body, and the magic items in the shop emitted a faint glow, as if responding to her call.A powerful spatial ripple spread out from her as the center."Teleportation: Crimson Demon Village!"Wiz snapped her eyes open, and a blue magical light instantly enveloped Haru, Kazuma, Megumin, Darkness, Aqua, Yunyun, and Mimi in her arms, along with the mountain of sweet potatoes and dried meat.A wave of intense dizziness hit them, and the surrounding scenery began to twist and blur, as if they were inside a kaleidoscope.Aqua's startled cry reached their ears, while Kazuma let out a scream like a dying pig. Darknessgroaned softly with a look of enjoyment, and Megumin held Mimi tightly, trying to remain calm.In the next second, all sensation came to an abrupt halt.When Haru opened his eyes again, they were in a completely unfamiliar land.Before them was a vast plain, and the rolling mountains in the distance were a peculiar shade of red.Not far away, a village made of red bricks and oddly shaped magic towers suddenly appeared in their sight—this was the Crimson Demon Village.Just as the dizziness faded and Haru was rubbing his temples before he could even stand steady, two extremely piercing red lights shot out from the crooked guard post at the village entrance."Halt! Stepping upon this land graced by the forbidden flames, have you prepared your souls to be scorched?"Two Crimson Demon guards, wearing pitch-black cloaks and styled so exaggeratedly that one would wonder if they had just run off a tokusatsu set, marched out with uniform, mechanical steps.They simultaneously reached out to cover their left eyes (even though there were no eye patches there) and struck an extremely spine-twisting JoJo pose."My name is Pucci! I am the one who manipulates the thunder of the void and hunts nightmares within the eternal Darkness!"One of the tall guards swung his cloak violently, kicking up a cloud of meaningless dust."My name is Chekov! I am the shadow dancer who walks the edge of the abyss and weaves despair into a lullaby!"The other, shorter guard took over the shouting, and even pulled out a handful of shiny sequins from somewhere to throw into the air.The two roared in unison:"Who goes there! State your names! Or your lowly lives shall become nourishment for this red earth!"Haru and Kazuma looked at each other, and both simultaneously developed dead-fish eyes.Just then, Yunyun, who had always longed for recognition, seemed to see a savior and suddenly jumped to the front, waving her staff and shouting:"Pucci! Chekov! It's me! I'm Yunyun! The village chief's daughter, Yunyun! I've brought my companions back to save the village!"The two guards looked at each other, then wore expressions of utter confusion."Yunyun? Whose name is that? It sounds like some kind of soft dessert.""No idea, maybe some passing wandering merchant? Hey, outsiders, we don't buy junk here.""Ugh... Waaaah! I clearly said goodbye to you before I left!"Yunyun instantly sank into her self-isolation mode, squatting on the ground and drawing circles.Megumin gave a cold snort, adjusted her large wizard hat, and stepped forward with a swagger that disowned all relatives.She skillfully pushed aside the blocking Yunyun, the red light in her left eye flaring up instantly, and her cloak danced wildly even without any wind (Harususpected she was secretly using breeze magic)."My name is Megumin! I am the number one genius of the Crimson Demon Clan, the one who manipulates the ultimate destructive magic, Explosion Magic! I am also the Lord of the Abyss who strikes terror into the monsters of Axel and makes the world tremble!"The two guards froze for half a second, then showed expressions of sudden realization."Ohhh! So it's that one with the head problem... Ahem, I mean, it's that genius Megumin!""Long time no see. You're still the same, saying these incomprehensible but imposing things as soon as you return."Seeing this, Mimi excitedly popped out from her small cloak and puffed out her chest, mimicking her sister:"My name is Mimi! I am the Child of the End destined to surpass my sister and shower the earth with the light of destruction! Currently, I am training in the forbidden secret art of eating all the sweet potatoes!""Ooooh! As expected of Megumin's sister, the younger generation is truly formidable!" the guards praised.However, in the next second, the air suddenly froze.The two guards, Megumin, and even Mimi all turned their heads in unison, staring intently at Yunyun—who was still drawing circles on the ground—with that "uniquely Crimson Demon, judgmental" red gaze.Yunyun felt the mountain-like pressure. She looked up and found that Haru and Kazuma were also looking at her with expressions that said, "just go along with them.""Um... do I really have to say it?" Yunyun's face was as red as a ripe tomato, and her voice trembled violently."It's the rule, Yunyun." Megumin crossed her arms with a serious face. "If you cannot display the dignity of the Crimson Demon Clan, we cannot enter the village."Yunyun took a deep breath and closed her eyes. As if heading to an execution ground, she swung her staff violently and let out a scream so embarrassing she was on the verge of tears:"M-My name is Yunyun! I am the daughter of the Crimson Demon Chief, the one who will eventually inherit the position of chief and lead the stars! I am also... also... the Lightning Mage who wields the bolt that pierces solitude and dances upon the lonely wasteland!"After finishing, Yunyun slumped to the ground as if drained of all strength, tightly covering her face with her cloak:"Waaaah... Don't look at me! Mr. Lin Jin, please absolutely forget what I just said!"The two guards nodded with satisfaction: "Hmm, very spirited!"
Chapter 156: Idiots and Madmen Always ResonateAfter the two guards, Pucci and Chekov, finished praising Mimi, their gazes—flickering with the ruby-like light of chuunibyou—slowly moved to the remaining four."So, for the rest of you, in this moment where fates intertwine, do you still not intend to unveil that layer of lowly disguise?"Pucci suddenly pulled his cloak tight, covering half his face, his voice low as if crawling out of a cellar.Haru and Kazuma exchanged a glance, both seeing deep resistance and the despair of 'I want to go back to Axel' in each other's eyes.For two guys who prided themselves on having a bit of normal human dignity, playing this kind of shameful role-play in broad daylight was more painful than being submerged by an army of Cabbages.However, just as Haru was planning to fudge his way through with the excuse that they were just porters delivering sweet potatoes, Aqua's eyes suddenly lit up, and her whole being seemed to have a strange switch flipped."Hmph hmph hmph, since you've asked so sincerely and earnestly, then this Goddess shall show mercy and tell you!"Aqua did a magnificent spin, her water-blue hair fluttering in the wind. She not only imitated the tone of the Crimson Demon Clan but even went a step further, condensing a cluster of harmless but extremely dazzling water spray at her fingertips.She struck that iconic, extremely narcissistic goddess pose—one hand on her hip, the other hand forming an orchid finger gesture against her chin, her body leaning back at an exaggerated angle."My name is Aqua! I am the Goddess of Water, revered by all, presiding over life and pure water! I am also the supreme embodiment of faith for the Axis Order! Tremble, mortals! In this holy baptism, experience this Goddess's unparalleled beauty and mercy! Oh—ho ho ho ho!"The air was dead silent for three seconds."Oh... Ohhhhhhh!!" Pucci and Chekov let out earth-shattering cheers, even high-fiving each other in excitement. "This meaningless confidence! This visually impactful movement! And this title that sounds incredibly impressive (even though it's obviously fake)!""You're a natural-born Crimson Demon! No, you're even more of a Crimson Demon than the Crimson Demon Clan themselves, blue-haired lady!"Aqua was floating on cloud nine from the praise. She patted Haru and Kazuma's shoulders with a smug look, her expression full of the superiority of a high-ranking being:"How's that? Haru, Kazuma! Have you seen this Goddess's prowess? As long as I show a bit of my true strength, these red-eyed brats are head over heels for me. You two hurry up, don't embarrass this Goddess!"Kazuma's mouth twitched:"Is this what they call 'idiots and madmen always resonate'..."Just as Haru was considering whether to just pretend to faint, Darkness beside him suddenly let out a heavy breath.Her heroic and pretty face was now so red it almost looked like it would drip blood, and her body was shaking violently from extreme shame and... some indescribable excitement."Y-yes... this is a necessary... trial..." Darknessgripped her sword hilt tightly, her knuckles turning white from the force.She took a deep breath as if throwing caution to the wind, suddenly stepped forward, and struck an extremely awkward pose that tried to imitate a Thiefbut looked more like she was begging for mercy."M-my name is... D-Darkness!" Her voice trembled beyond recognition, carrying a weird sense of flushed excitement. "I am the Crusader with the kingdom's highest defense, who willingly endures all manner of ravaging and humiliation from enemy forces on the front lines! No matter what kind of attack, no matter how despicable the methods, bring it on! Even if I have to strike such a shameful pose in public to gain entry... I... I will never yield... Ugh... Q-quick, kill me with those gazes full of contempt!"The two guards fell silent again, then stood in solemn respect."I have no idea what she's talking about, but that spirit of insisting on finishing her speech even when she's so ashamed she's about to break... That's a hard-boiled soul! A truly hard-boiled soul!""It's over, this party is beyond saving. Now only Kazuma and I are left. If I don't do something, I'm really going to be assimilated by these guys..."Haru covered his face in pain, the gaze through the gaps in his fingers filled with despair for this world.However, after three seconds of psychological struggle, the look in Kazuma's eyes suddenly became exceptionally determined, even showing a desperate 'nothing left to lose' ferocity.Kazuma turned his head and gave Haru a look filled with tragic heroism:"Haru, accept your fate. Since we can't resist this torrent of chuunibyou, we can only sink into it completely! Anyway, nobody knows us here. As long as I'm not embarrassed, the ones who are embarrassed will be others!"After saying that, Kazuma took a big step forward, dropped into a half-squat, crossed his hands in front of his chest, and then quickly swept them out to his sides, striking a highly accurate Kamen Rider transformation pose."My name is Satou Kazuma! I am the fate-stealer who crossed the realm of life and death, returning from the depths of another world! I am also the scum King who controls the arts of Lurk and Steal, judging evil from the shadows! Tremble, for this is the soul of a man who will never bow even before a goddess!"A subtle silence fell over the scene. Pucci and Chekov looked at each other and stroked their chins."Hmm... while the movements are standard and the lines are passable, I feel like it's missing that Crimson Demon brand of madness where you'd risk your life just to look cool.""But that title of 'scum King' sounds like it has the potential for a great evil villain. I'll barely let you pass."Kazuma retreated to the side as if a heavy burden had been lifted. Then, everyone's gaze—Including the two guards, the smug Aqua, the flushed Darkness, the expectant Megumin and Mimi, and even Yunyun, who was crouching on the ground drawing circles, all looked up and stared intently at the only normal person left, Haru.The corners of Haru's mouth twitched violently, and the veins on his forehead bulged.He looked at the red-glowing eyes of the two guards, then at the pile of sweet potatoes stacked like a small mountain, and finally his gaze landed on Megumin's big eyes, which were practically screaming 'Haru, show off your coolness quickly'."Dammit... at this point, I can only pull out my most shameful lines..."Haru took a deep breath, and as if exhausting all his energy, he suddenly flung the handle of the cart.His entire aura suddenly exploded. He slammed his right hand over his left eye, his body bending backward at an extremely unnatural angle, his left hand pointing to the sky, his voice low and magnetic (though it was forced)."Hmph, since you insist on peering into the truth sealed at the bottom of the abyss... then behold!"Haru snapped his eyes open, his gaze sharp as lightning:"My name is Haru! I am the Observer who walks between reality and illusion, presiding over the balance of all things! I am also the Lord of Asheswho severs causality and reshapes order within chaos! My right hand houses the karmic flames capable of incinerating stars, and my left hand holds the frost that freezes time! Were it not to protect the peace of this land, my true name should not have been awakened here and now!"Haru's lines, combined with his extremely oppressive posture, instantly produced a shocking visual effect.Pucci and Chekov were completely stunned. Their mouths hung open, and the glitter in their hands scattered all over the ground."Oh... Ohhhhhhh!! Too strong! This feeling of having absolutely no idea what he's saying but thinking it's incredibly badass!""Lord of Ashes! That title is just too cool! Young man, are you sure you're not an illegitimate child of our Crimson Demon Clan who was lost to the outside world?!"Megumin shouted even more excitedly:"Did you hear that! This is my companion! As expected of the leader I chose, this level of chuunibyou... no, this level of dominance, is practically on par with this genius!"Amidst the cheers of the crowd, Haru silently lowered his head, two lines of tears flowing in his heart:"It's over, my last shred of dignity... has completely shattered into dust..."
Chapter 157: The Man with eris Flowing from His FingertipsAfter successfully passing the excruciatingly embarrassing village entry ceremony at the entrance of the Crimson Demon Village, Yunyun's flushed face finally peeked out from her cloak.She stole a cautious glance at Haru, her eyes filled with a mix of apology and gratitude."Mr... Mr. Lin Jin... Mr. Kazuma... everyone. I-I'll head home first to check on the situation in the village with my father, and also... also to sort out my feelings a bit."Yunyun's voice was as thin as a mosquito's buzz, yet she still tried her best to maintain the solemnity characteristic of the Crimson Demon Clan."You... you can follow Megumin and Mimi to their house first. I'll-I'll come find you later."After saying that, she shot another quick glance at Haru, the blush on her face deepening."Also... thank you for the... wonderful performance just now, Mr. Lin Jin. Next time... next time I'll work hard too!"With those words, Yunyun practically fled, rushing toward a tall tower deep within the village."Hmph, at least she has some self-awareness." Megumin crossed her arms, striking a tsundere pose. "But to think she could surpass a genius like me with lines of that level is nothing but a pipe dream!"Haru watched Yunyun's retreating figure and couldn't help but sigh in his heart."As the only normal person, it really isn't easy for that child."Just then, Kazuma suddenly leaned in, nudging Haruwith his elbow. His eyes kept darting toward the pile of sweet potatoes and dried meat, then he jerked his chin in Megumin's direction.The meaning couldn't be clearer: "The dowry! The dowry! It's time to deliver the dowry!"Receiving Kazuma's ocular telegram, Haru cleared his throat understandingly."Since Yunyun has business to attend to, we shouldn't delay. Megumin, Mimi, we'll have to trouble you to lead the way. Let's get these... supplies to your house first."Haru placed extra emphasis on the word'supplies' and raised an eyebrow at Kazuma, signaling him to stop making faces."Hmph! At least you're sensible! A genius's home isn't just somewhere anyone can enter!"Though Megumin's words were sharp, she couldn't hide the hint of pride on her face; she was clearly very pleased with Haru's suggestion.And so, led by Megumin and Mimi, the group pushed the cart laden with 'dowry' and set off grandly down the main road of the Crimson Demon Village.The architectural style of the Crimson Demon Village was indeed full of the clan's unique chuunibyou aesthetic.Every house looked like an enlarged version of some magic circle, with all sorts of bizarre flags sticking out of the roofs, and some even had giant eyeballs or demon sculptures hanging from them.The pedestrians on the street were equally extraordinary; some wore pointed hats and held staves, their cloaks billowing even without wind as they walked.Others wore eyepatches and leaned against walls in exaggerated poses, looking as if they were ready to belt out an earth-shattering declaration at any moment.When Haru and the other outsiders passed by pushing a cart full of sweet potatoes and dried meat, they immediately drew the gaze of every Crimson Demon villager."Ooh! Isn't that Megumin? She's brought back so many friends!""That blue-haired woman... that unreasonable level of confidence is even purer than us Crimson Demons!""Hey! Look at that blonde with the big chest! Her armor looks so sturdy! I really want to blast her with magic!"The villagers chattered among themselves, but there was no malice; it was mostly curiosity and the excitement of people who loved a good spectacle.Kazuma pushed the cart, his face a picture of utter despair.He stole a glance at Haru and whispered a complaint:"Haru, I mean, do you think Megumin's parents will accept me?"Haru curled his lip, thinking that Kazuma really was a virgin—did he actually think he was going to meet the parents in that sense?However, he still said, "Don't worry. I heard Megumin mention before that her family isn't very well-off. Right now, you're the second wealthiest man in all of Axel after me. Have some confidence!"Along the way, Aqua was like a fish in water, constantly waving at the curious villagers and even trying to teach them the tenets of the Axis Order. The results were less than ideal, however, drawing whispers of "That blue-haired woman's brain doesn't seem quite right."After crossing several streets filled with chuunibyou vibes, Megumin stopped in front of a house that looked grand but had peeling paint and several magical patches on the roof.She threw the door open and shouted in the tone of a returning general:"Father! Mother! I, the Crimson Demon Clan's number one genius, Megumin, have returned with friends and wealth enough to buy half the village!"As soon as she finished speaking, the sound of something heavy hitting the floor came from inside. Immediately after, a man with short black hair and sharp eyes (though with an air of poverty) and a woman who looked remarkably like Megumin but with a more gentle and mature aura rushed out."Ooh! My daughter who inherited the power of the abyss, you've finally... wait, are those sweet potatoes? Are those high-grade sweet potatoes radiating a golden luster?!"Megumin's father, the self-proclaimed magic item master Hyo Saburo, had been striking a distorted pose, but his eyes nearly popped out when he saw the mountain of supplies on the cart."And dried meat! The kind of smoked meat you can't even eat your fill of at the Harvest Festival!" Megumin's mother, Yuiyui, practically teleported to the cart, her hands trembling as she stroked the food, a red light of discovery shining in her eyes. "Mimi! You didn't lie to Mother. Your sister really brought back enough to save our family's livelihood... no, these are offerings that would make even the gods salivate!"Watching the parents who had fallen completely into a food-induced frenzy, Haru gave a subtle look to Kazuma behind him."Ahem, Uncle, Auntie, it's a pleasure to meet you. I am Haru, and this is our captain, Satou Kazuma."Haru pushed Kazuma forward, his tone becoming earnest. "Actually, most of these things were brought by Kazuma to express his gratitude for Megumin's daily care. He specifically went bankrupt... ah, no, he casually pulled these out from his private vault as a small token of his appreciation."Receiving Haru's signal, the initially awkward Kazuma felt his vanity swell to the limit upon seeing the idolizing gazes of Megumin's parents.He mimicked Haru's earlier style, one hand in his pocket while the other flamboyantly brushed his bangs aside, striking the pose of a nouveau riche tycoon."Hmph, just a few carts of sweet potatoes and dried meat. It's not worth mentioning."Kazuma spoke in a low voice that reeked of the stench of money."In Axel, people call me the incarnation of luck or the man with eris flowing from his fingertips. While I do possess a mansion that would make a dragon jealous and countless pieces of top-tier equipment, to me, being able to trade this worldly wealth for the smiles of Megumin's family is where the true value of money lies."Hearing this, Hyo Saburo and Yuiyui exchanged a glance, their eyes instantly filled with the zeal of having found the perfect rich son-in-law."Ooh! This spirit of treating money like dirt! This financial power that looks down upon the masses!"Hyo Saburo grabbed Kazuma's hand with startling strength."Mr. Kazuma! No, Lord Kazuma! Please, come inside! Our home may be humble, but we will host you with the highest standards of Crimson Demon etiquette!""Yes, yes, please come in!"Yuiyui went as far as to take Kazuma's other arm, her smile widening. "Megumin must have caused you a lot of trouble, hasn't she? It's fine, we have an even more obedient Mimi here. If you don't mind, we can sit down and have a long chat about the future...""Hey! Mother! What kind of weird things are you saying!" Megumin stomped her feet in a panic, her face as red as an about-to-detonate Explosion Magic. "Kazuma is just my servant! He's my bag-carrier! He's not some rich son-in-law!"However, the parents, already captured by the sweet potatoes and dried meat, couldn't hear Megumin's protests. They crowded around Kazumaand ushered him into the house like they were welcoming a god of wealth.Haru walked at the back, watching Kazuma's light-headed figure as if he had reached the peak of his life. He then looked at the dazed Aqua and Darkness and couldn't help but mutter to himself:"Is this guy Kazuma really going to marry into the family here in the Crimson Demon Village? Still, seeing Megumin's parents like this, the coming days are probably going to be very interesting..."