I took a long, assessing look at the creature.
Right. Each swing costs roughly a quarter of a breath, two shoulder twinges, and one increasingly audible groan. Each hit does about eighteen damage. Factor in the slime's defense, and that leaves me with... four.
Which meant I only needed sixty-five perfectly timed, perfectly wasteful slashes to put this thing down.
Sixty-five.
The optimal plan would be to swing just enough to look impressive, then spend the rest of the fight pretending to be meditating between strikes. But that would sound criminally unknightly if I admitted it. Unless... I made it look like it had been part of the plan all along. Dishonesty was also unknightly, but it wasn't as though Ceralis would let me admit to the truth anyway.
I cleared my throat and declared, "Behold, as I slay this creature while obfuscating my aetheric profile."
The Ceralis made no change to my line, except for amplifying the sound and making it sound like a warcry.
Great. Now that I'm lying through my teeth, you suddenly decide that my words don't need any alterations.
Anabeth audibly gasped. "Obfuscating your aetheric profile?" she hopped like a happy little rabbit. "That's advanced concealment thaumaturgy! You know what I think, Sir Henry? I think that technique cannot be done perfectly unless you are a God-level magic user!"
I wish she'd stop thinking.
Anabeth clapped her hands together, absolutely sparkling with excitement. "Oh, this is going to be an amazing learning experience! I shall record every movement of your aura, Sir Henry!"
Wonderful. Just what I needed: an audience and documentation.
The gloomslime gurgled.
I angled my feet the way Sir Roland had once shown me when he wanted someone to think they'd been schooled. The slime's bulk sat mostly centered like a sac of bad intentions; its sides thinned into ragged lobes where it had been sliding along the tunnel wall. If I struck the flank, the slice would have to travel farther through the wobbly membrane to reach the core mass. That meant either more effective damage per swing or more time for the blob to fuss itself off-balance. Either outcome was acceptable so long as it involved fewer swings and less sweating.
I slashed with a diagonal sweep that I'd practiced.
Damage Dealt: 9 + 9 – 14 = 4
I snuck in a dexterous lateral cut just for good measures.
Damage Dealt: 8 + 7 – 14 = 1
[Greater Gloomslime]
HP: 255/260
Okay... Trying to sneak in a quick one doesn't work, since my form isn't good enough to actually deal reliable damage.
Anabeth called out, "Your swordform was artfully inelegant, Ser! I daresay your mastery of subtlety exceeds all expectations!"
Ah, yes. No need to remind me how my ATK was only 7 out of 15...
After another five minutes of hard work, I started having to conceal my weariness, and the Gloomslime was nowhere near dying.
The good news was that I'd only gotten hit one more time. The bad news was that I'd need to rest soon, and Anabeth, bless her boundless enthusiasm, was still studying my every move as though I were demonstrating the lost arts of swordsmanship. She'd given me no chance to laze around.
Fine. If I couldn't stop moving, I could at least talk my way into a pause.
I drew a slow breath, preparing my best scholarly tone. "Now, Lady Anabeth," I began, "observe how a true knight conceals his swordform to—" Then Ceralis intervened. "—to destroy deception itself, to rend falsehood from the marrow of creation, and to let no veil nor shadow stand unburned before the purity of my blade, right now! I shall not rest until my sword brings doom upon this filthy creature!"
Anabeth gasped once more. "Yes! You're finally showing your true strength!"
I exhaled. The slime gurgled in agreement, which felt needlessly smug for something without a face.
Curse you, Ceralis, you self-righteous chorus of ornamental adjectives!
Fine. Guess I'll re-engage.
Then I remembered the bogmaw incident. My verbal taunting hadn't worked then, but I could use my commanding presence. The key was Silent Authority.
I would simply stare the creature into submission, break its will to live, then crush its courage beneath the sheer weight of my knightly bearing. Perhaps even force it to disperse all its END in shame.
I'd seen this before. Not in slimes—never in slimes—but in half-formed dungeon fauna. Creatures with barely-there instincts that still responded to dominance cues, posture, presence.
And this was a Greater variant. Maybe it would have greater awareness than a normal slime.
I fixed the slime with my most imperious glare. Two seconds passed.
[Passive: Silent Authority Activated]
The creature stopped dead.
Yes. Yes! It's working! Why haven't you thought of this before, Henry? You bloody idiot, you're a genius!
Then it wobbled. Then it sloshed. Then it spat a glob of acidic despair straight onto my greave.
[-1 HP]
[Intimidation Failed: Target Lacks Sentience → Immune to Psychological Effects]
What? This creature is indeed too brainless to feel fear!
Then I heard it a tiny, trembling sound that definitely wasn't coming from the slime.
I turned my head.
Anabeth was staring at me, wide-eyed and trembling as she pressed her hand over her heart. Her lips parted. "... So majestic..."
[Seduction Succeeded]
[Silent Authority: Super Effective]
[Effect Duration: 60 seconds ~ Eternity]
What? Eternity? No! By the love of Saint Merin's kidney, I don't need this—
Then the slime spat another glob of goo on me.
[-1 HP]
[HP: 52/55]
Ah! I must focus on dispatching... hold on.
Anabeth was dazed, and looked very much like she needed medical attention! Decision made, I straightened until I looked suitably monumental. "Lady Anabeth!" I declared. "You appear to be in grave distress! Fear not! I shall shield you from further harm!" The Ceralis, naturally, chose this moment to amplify my voice again. "Behold! My duty compels me to safeguard the innocent! The valor of a knight knows no retreat, only repositioning!"
[Skill Activated: Knightly Choreography – Level 7]
I swept the sword in a perfectly choreographed arc, intercepting nothing but airborne slime, and backed toward safety. Ceralis added dramatic flares of light and echoing proclamations. Anabeth whispered in awe. Mission: temporarily accomplished.
"... So valorous..." I heard her whisper.
Excellent. She was completely taken in.
[Silent Authority: Effect Waned]
Anabeth's expression shifted from reverent awe to mild confusion. "Sir Henry... it's just a slime."
For one horrifying heartbeat, reason flooded back into my skull. But knights don't flinch at reason. Knights out-reason the reason.
"The question," I said swiftly—so swiftly that even Ceralis didn't have time to translate it into anything more pompous—"is not whether it is just a slime, Lady Anabeth, but that you were dazed and required immediate medical attention!"
I had never spoken so fast in my life. The words came out sharp, noble, and somehow almost convincing.
Anabeth gasped softly. "You noticed my condition even while battling a monster?"
"Like you said, Lady Anabeth, it is no monster but a slime. Your condition is of more importance." I'd done it. I'd regained my ability to talk so smoothly, it—"AND SHOULD ANY HARM BEFALL HER, LET THE EARTH ITSELF SPLIT OPEN IN RIGHTEOUS FURY TO DEVOUR HER ASSAILANT!" Ceralis intervened.
By the wills of the Saints, I've messed up once more—
Anabeth's eyes shimmered with fresh awe. "... So protective..."
Never mind, this is great! Ceralis, you overzealous relic, I love you and hate you at once.
Now then, what had flashed before my eyes earlier?
[Skill Activated: Knightly Choreography – Level 7]
That was new. I didn't recall earning any 'level sevens' in my life, unless Ceralis was ranking me on how dramatically I could backpedal.
Ceralis, I willed it, lowering my sword to a resting pose that looked appropriately meditative. Show me my current skills.
The thing obeyed without commentary. Blue glow spread before my eyes, forming a neat script in the air like a miracle performed for bureaucrats.