Morning in the cottage arrived with a gentle breeze through the windows, birds singing, sunlight warming the wooden floorboards.
Inside, chaos was already underway.
Lee Min lay on a blanket while his father tiptoed around the room installing "baby-proofing" traps that absolutely no baby ever needed.
Or would ever survive, if they weren't him.
His father was muttering to himself as he hammered something into the wall.
"Okay… okay. This is fine. If I just pad the walls, reinforce the beams, tie down the chairs, secure the shelves… maybe I'll live to see next week."
He stood back and admired his handiwork.
Swaths of fabric lined every surface.
Rope tied the chairs together like hostages.
Heavy boxes were strapped to the floor.
The place looked less like a home and more like a bizarre ritual chamber.
His wife walked in, stopped, stared at the padded walls, then at her husband.
"…Honey," she said softly, "what… is this?"
"It's for our safety," he whispered, pupils shrinking. "HAVE YOU SEEN WHAT HE DOES WHEN HE SNEEZES?"
Lee's Internal Struggle: Speak or Die Trying
Meanwhile, Lee was staring hard at his mother, concentrating with all the might of his infant soul.
The System chimed politely:
[Tutorial Step 5: First Word!]
Goal: Produce a simple vocalization like "ma" or "pa."
Reward: +2 CHA
Warning: Host's vocal cords may unintentionally release magic.
Good luck.
Lee felt incredibly stressed.
Speaking should be easy… except it wasn't.
He'd been babbling nonsense all week.
"Ah-oo… baa… gaaah…"
Every time he tried, he got frustrated and ended up summoning a gust of wind that knocked over a lamp or sent dishes rattling.
But today, he could feel it.
Today might be the day.
His mother leaned close, smiling warmly.
"Aww, are you trying to talk, sweetheart?"
He inhaled deeply.
Opened his mouth.
And…
"MMMAAAAA—"
A wave of mana burst from his chest like a shockwave.
The walls trembled.
The padded beams shook.
The chairs, despite being tied down, scooted a full inch.
His father screamed and dove behind the couch.
His mother clapped delightedly.
"He said 'ma!' I knew it! I KNEW IT!"
Lee stared at her in shock.
He had done it.
He had spoken.
Sort of.
The System disagreed.
[First Word Attempt Registered]
Output: "MMAAAAAAGGRRRRHHHH"
Accuracy: 35%
Magic Stability: 0%
Casualties: None (miraculously)
Reward Granted:
[CHA +2]
Lee wasn't sure whether to be proud or terrified.
**Father vs Baby-Proofing: The Background Battle**
While Lee basked in the baby achievement glow, his father emerged cautiously from behind the couch like a war survivor.
"That wasn't a word," he muttered. "That was a BATTLE CRY."
He immediately went back to work reinforcing the cottage.
First, he installed a wooden gate around the fireplace.
"It's for safety," he whispered.
He hammered it tight.
Lee sneezed.
A gust of magic blew the gate off its hinges and into the hallway.
His father stared blankly at the remains.
"…That was my best work."
Then he tried padding the crib with extra blankets and tying the blankets to the crib rails with rope.
Lee sneezed again.
All the blankets inflated with mana like balloons, lifting the crib two feet in the air.
The crib gently floated, then settled back down.
Lee blinked innocently.
His father sat on the floor, hands trembling.
"I can't baby-proof GOD MAGIC."
**Second Word Attempt: Disaster Level Rises**
Later that afternoon, his mother sat cross-legged on the floor, holding Lee in her lap.
"Can you say 'ma'? Can you say 'pa'?"
His father shook his head violently from across the room.
"No—no let's NOT encourage sound-based destruction again—"
But it was too late.
Lee opened his mouth, took a deep breath, and—
"PAAAAAA—"
BOOOOOM!
A shockwave rippled out.
The padded walls absorbed most of the blast… barely.
The windows shook.
The dishes rattled.
The table jumped like it was startled.
The pantry door popped open on its own.
Lee shrieked in terror at the sight of a tall, box-shaped object moving.
His mother hugged him tightly.
"There, there! It's okay! It's just the pantry!"
His father shouted, "JUST THE PANTRY? LAST TIME HE NEARLY KILLED IT!"
The System appeared smugly:
[Second Word Attempt Registered]
Accuracy: 20%
Magic Discharge: Significant
Phobia Triggered: Vending-Machine-Like Object
Lee whimpered internally:
I WILL NEVER ESCAPE THIS FEAR.
**Accidental Bonus Spell: Baby's First Sonic Scream**
Just when everyone thought the chaos had ended for the day…
Lee inhaled again.
His father dove for cover, screaming, "EVERYONE GET DOWN!"
His mother blinked.
"Sweetie, he's just yawning—"
He yawned.
And accidentally released a gentle sonic pulse.
Not destructive.
Just enough to rattle everything slightly.
The father peeked out from behind the cupboard.
"Did… did he just use magic in a YAWN?!"
The System helpfully logged it:
[New Passive Skill Acquired]
"Sonic Yawn"
Effect: Unintentionally emits sound waves capable of:
• Scaring birds
• Knocking loose objects off shelves
• Making father cry internally
Lee drooled on himself, completely unaware.
His mother cooed, "He's so precious."
His father sighed, rubbing his temples.
"I need a drink…"
And in the background, a padded cabinet slowly tipped forward…
Lee shrieked.
The cabinet gently landed on the padded floor without hurting anyone.
But his reaction?
Traumatized as always.
His mother hugged him.
His father questioned reality.
And the System quietly judged him.