Waking up in my bed, I simply just stared at the ceiling as I laid still. I didn't have the motivation to get up nor did I really want to get up. It's been a week since I've come home. Mom and my two older sisters don't treat me much different but the look in their eyes has changed. Filled with sadness and worry. Especially mom's gaze.
The only times I ever come out is to eat, use the restroom or to clean myself. Otherwise, I stay inside of my room. While it helps that I wasn't seen as the monster that I see myself as, it doesn't change my own perception any. I barely get any rest at night, unable to sleep from the disgust in myself and the rage I feel in my heart at that War Officer.
Knowing that killing her means dying as well doesn't make it any better. If anything, it only serves to stir the anger inside me even more. That isn't even half of what made the week feel like a mental hell either. With each day, I grew stronger. I can feel it. My mental capacity for my telekinetic strength, the ability to mentally control others and my ability to make myself or other things invisible.
My physical strength has grown as well. Along with my durability, endurance, agility, stamina, vitality and my 6 senses. They've all grown so much that the me a week ago seemed fragile compared to now. Not only that but I've become capable of telepathy, empathic telepathy, elemental telekinesis to a small degree and even able to tell when others are lying or not.
The glaring changes keep me constantly reminded that I'm not just human anymore. That I am also a part of what I hated the most. Like Anna, I've innately hated the Daviirn since I was young. Our reasons are different but it something we both share. Now, I have become a part of what we both hate the most in this world. On this world. That alone was haunting my mind. If anyone did hate me for what I've become, Anna would be the most likely to hate me.
That... hurt. A lot more than I'd like to admit. Needless to say, I was going through a mental hell as my body, a reminder of said hell, has never felt better and grows stronger. The only times I get to de-stress is when mom pulls me out of my shell and gets me to talk about what I learned from the War Officer. Afterwards, she gives me the best advice she can and tries her best to cheer me up.
Yet, I am aware that she has been telling dad everything that I've told her. I'm not sure how he took it and why he keeps having her give daily updates but it leaves me on edge. For now, we've all decided to collectively keep my genetic change a secret. Especially from Anna, as we all know how she is. That situation was volatile just thinking about it. I let out a long sigh, unsure of what to do.
The door to my room opened up and I stiffened in my bed. With my telekinetic senses, I knew who had walked into my room without even looking at him. With slow and steady steps, the sound of boots thumping against the synthetic wood floors grew closer. Before long, the image of a face that looked like my own but older appeared. His shaggy brown hair framed his impossibly handsome face and his emerald green eyes only added to his charm.
Dad peered down at me with a stern look but the eyes of a loving father were still there. Standing at 6 feet tall, dad had a wide shouldered body filled with chisled muscles that seem to be sculpted by divinity. He wore a green suit with a few metals over his left chest, adding more to his imposing aura. I felt my eyes tremble as I didn't even dare to look at him directly. Dad squinted his eyes at me slowly as he frowned.
"What are you doing, mopping around?" Dad asked sternly.
"Really?" I asked softly, my tone implying that he already knew the answer.
"What is that suppose to mean?" Dad raised a single sharp eyebrow.
"I'm a monster." I answered simply.
"Haaa..." Dad let out a long sigh, looking me over with his eyes.
I noticed a bit of shock appeared on his face but it was hidden as quickly as it appeared. My body was already full of lean muscles and I had grown far more handsome than I used to be. A boon that I detested everytime I saw my reflection. Dad looked me up and down a few times before speaking again.
"Before the invasion, two factions had already started a war on earth." He began slowly.
I turned my eyes to him when he paused, giving him a weird look. His expression grew grim before he continued his tale.
"One day, as I led my men into battle, I was commanded to kill the civilians there as well. There was a high profile target hidden among them and the need to kill them out weighed the lives of the other civilians. That day, I killed 127 men, women, children, elders and even a few infants with the very rifle in my hand." Dad stared me in the eyes as he spoke, not showing an ounce of fear.
"Heh?" I blinked a few times in shock.
"Do you think I don't think of myself as a monster everyday since that time?" Dad asked as he leaned down more.
"What?" I asked in shock, my mind unable to process what he just told.
"Son, the worst things about us humans is the fact that we are not monsters but we become monsters. Some are unhinged and wild. Some are controlled and pulled on a tight leash by the personality behind the monster. Do you know how you accept you've become a monster?" Dad pressed further, squinting his eyes at me deeply.
"No." I softly shook my head.
"You accept the monster that you are and use it as an extention of the person you were before becoming a monster. You become your own living weapon that has the most dangerous thing a human can have. Acceptance." Dad's words bit sharply but that was because it felt like the cold hard truth.
The truth was never an easy pill to swallow, after all.
"If you don't accept the monster you have become, the monster will form its own weapon and kill the 'you' before becoming a monster. And I'll be damned if you end up becoming like that because of some crazy Daviirn bitch who said you're not exactly human.
You look human, you seem human and I know you're feeling quite human right now. You may have the abilities and genetic code of that bitch but you are my son, a human." He spoke further with more cold truth before speaking with gritted teeth while looking pissed... for me.
"Thank you." I whispered with a small smile, my eyes misting up a bit.
Dad took a calming breath before nodding slowly.
"I'll take that as you're feeling better already. Now get up and get dressed, put on your armor and be prepared to go top-side. I've already cleaned out the cargo hold of your Krix and deposited the credits." Dad straightened his posture and held out his hand.
I smirked and took it, letting him help pull me up. I nodded firmly to him and began getting dressed before opening the metal cabinet containing my armor. As I got my armor on, dad continued to speak.
"We are going to go see just how different you are and how we can use that to humanities gain. There is already a small testing facility prepared. I've already talked with the top brass and they are actually thrilled about this situation. Honestly, the humans of earth are desperate and will take any compromise they can get. Through negotiations or violence." Dad's words threw me for a mental loop, causing me to turn to him with a shocked look.
"That means?" I asked hesitantly.
"I will be going with you to meet this War Officer after some basic tests of your physical body and new psionic abilities. I hope you can accept your new found heritage and act as a peaceful bridge for the humans of earth. As much as we hate it, that woman gave us an olive branch and we plan to take it." Dad explained the plan a bit better before getting to the point.
"But is that really the right thing to do?" I asked with a reluctant look, I felt extremely unsure about this.
"Son, sometimes the right thing is the most unsettling option available. I know what I'm asking of you. You are just like Anna." Dad stepped over to me and placed both hands on my shoulders.
"I am asking you to accept what you hate most. The Daviirn. I'm asking you to accept the monster that is yourself. Something you loathe and will loathe for the rest of your life. For humanity." Dad expanded deeper, lightly pressing a finger into my chest.
"The monster that is myself, huh? I can't promise much but I'll try. Speaking of Anna, does she know?" I let out a dejected sigh before asking with a wry smile.
"Yes. And she is absolutely livid. I had to sedate her from going rogue and kicking a chance at negotiations into the fire. She's not angry with you but that War Officer. She feels that someone has committed the greatest sin against her." Dad nodded as he chuckled, reassuring me that Anna didn't hate me.
"Should have been expected." I chuckled wryly, shaking my head with dark amusement.
"Mn." Dad grunted. "Now, get ready and meet me in the garage." Dad patted my shoulder a few times before turning away.
I watched him leave before letting out a soft sigh. The feeling of disgust welled up again but I shook my head, distracting myself by getting ready. This time, I made sure to completely fill my mag pouches and even take a sidearm with me. That, and two long combat knives. Grabbing my helmet, I looked over its beaten appearance. It had several scratches over its top and even a few shallow burn marks.
Marks from debris of that explosion and the few times a plasma round barely grazed me. My mood darkened a bit before I turned the helmet around and placed it on my head. Turning around, now fully geared up and ready, I began to walk out of my room.
'I'm not sure if I can accept that new part of myself but I'll be damned if I don't use it. Dad is right, I need to make a weapon out of it before it becomes the weapon against me.' I thought with grim determination.
Yet, I made sure that I would get my mother back for what she has done. If I'm going to live with myself like this, then she will live with my hate.
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"Jack, this is Dr. Mishtval. She is a leading specialist with genetic modifications and how they affect the human mind and/or body. She will be leading your next set of test." Dad introduced with a stoic expression.
Currently, we stood inside of a large white room. Lined up on the far side was a series of devices to test and record data depending on the test's objective. In front of me was a short woman with long blonde hair and sharp, curious gray eyes. She probably stood no taller than 5 feet 3 inches, making her look like a smurf to my 6 feet and 2 inches. I had gained 3 inches over the last week.
Dr. Mishtval wore a pair of big round glasses, bags under her eyes from long sleepless nights but still seem extremely energetic. She seem no older than her mid 30's, making her short height seem even more comical. With a petite body, she was still a cutey. More for those that like woman with small curves and being the indoor type, though. Dr. Mishtval waved a hand at me.
"Howdy, Jack. I mean this as a praise but I'm really looking forward to seeing your blood work and other dna tests. It will surely improve genetic modifications by leaps and bounds. Plus, help us undertand your unique biological make up." Dr. Mishtval greeted and spoke eagerly, her voice naturally a few octanes high.
I grimaced. "Thanks but that really doesn't sound much like a complement. Just proves further how different I am." I nodded but gave my opinion.
Dr. Mishtval sucked in a cold breath. "Then be ready to be very uncomfortable today. I guess the quicker we get started, the sooner we're done." She shrugged and waved for me to follow.
"I agree with that line of thinking." I nodded with a wry tone, following her.
"Take your time, son. I need to go visit the armory so I'll be back soon." Dad chuckled before turning around, leaving me alone with the doctor.
Dr. Mishtval grabbed a tablet from her lonesome desk before leading me over to the first device. She messed with the settings a bit and did a few checks on the device before pointing at a large solid surface while looking down at her tablet.
"Give that a good punch." She instructed.
I nodded and raised my fist. Using about half effort, I threw my fist forward. The entire device slid back about 4 feet. I blinked a few times in shock. The device itself was twice my height and about 10 feet long. It had to weigh a few thousand pounds at least.
"Did... you just move that with a punch?" Dr. Mishtval slowly looked up at the device and asked slowly with disbelief.
"About 4 feet?" I answered, shocked myself.
"How hard did you hit it?" She further probed, still stareing at the device in shock.
"About half of my effort. Why?" I answered calmly as I lowered my fist.
"... You broke it." After pursing her lips, Dr. Mishtval revealed with squinted eyes.
"What?" I croaked in shock.
"This is going to be a long day." Dr. Mishtval sighed dejectedly.