My heart was bumping so hard in my chest that l thought I was going to die from the anxiety l felt at that moment. but from how could this be, l has calculated everything beforehand on how it was going to end but now it's just all going to end in vain. Standing on the edge of the windows which were very big, that l could just through them and escape, my body was frozen in that place and l could only just stare at him, looking at me with an expressionless face.
Why is it happening now, l has done all my best to protect him from danger, but it seems like l am not quite suitable for that. My body was frozen in that place and l could only just stare at him. He looked crushed and l exactly knew why.
Next to us dead bodies were laying on the ground and in those bodies, there was this old man with gray hair and Alexander stared at him intently for a while before h looked right at me after that, blood was flooding everywhere that you could think that there was a stream of it, indeed that was me who just did all that and now things are never going to be same again because how could it be.
He is probably going to hate me after this; I just killed his father and now am still standing here looking at him expecting some kind of forgiveness or maybe. l should have never taken this mission but if l didn't, we were never going to see each other.
He started trying to get closer to me where l was, step by step and my body could only dread from what was going to happen next if he touches me. Thunders started to clap louder and louder as the minutes went on. my hands were trembling terribly still having drops of blood on my skin and my face my clothes even though there were black you could still tell that there was. And l kind of felt disgusted by myself first time in my life ever feeling like this.
I even tried to give myself a relief by saying that l was wearing a black mask hiding half of my face but that wasn't going to help because he could see my eyes, the vibrant, radiant and mysterious allure they carried.
And all of this happened went downhill because allowed myself to open up my heart. I was clearly seeing the signs and it's the number one rule that weren't supposed to have any relationship if we do enter this career, but l guess l was that naive.
From where l was standing l could see that in his eyes, he was utterly broken and it seemed like nothing was left to it and all because of me. I have been so selfish this whole time, thinking maybe that he will be oaky with it but now l am nowhere different from all those people l has hated for my whole life, I could remember that time like it was just yesterday.
The whole room was help up in a strong tension and because of how dark it was the starry night sky shone brighter than ever into the room. The solarium room with glasses which rose around us like frozen water, clear and cruel. The sky stared back through it, endless and indifferent, making the room feel less like shelter and more like a confession.
"Evie...is that you?" His voice came out thinner than usual and with his knees getting weaker he collapsed on the ground and at the sight of him looking like that, my heart just cracked, this is going to be hard from me now on. but right at that moment l wasn't supposed to do anything except only just look at him for the lays time.
"Am sorry Alex... but this is the end...." l spoke carefully, holding my voice together the way one holds something already broken. Each word was measured, afraid of what would happen if l just let go now.
And with no other delays l turned around and then tried to jump through the glass walls, which were behind me. l couldn't bear the tension anymore and if l saw him again like that suffering because if me l would clearly end right then and there.
But at that moment, his hand closed around mine just as my foot lifted toward the glass. The cold barrier of the solarium loomed, tall and unyielding, but his grip was warm and steady, anchoring me. I could feel the pulse of his palm through mine, strong and insistent, as if saying without words: don't go.
Outside, the night stretched endless, stars scattered like silver fire across velvet sky, and for a moment, the world seemed to hold its breath with us. My heart hammered, wanting to leap, but his fingers tightened just enough, gentle yet impossible to ignore. I looked into his eyes, and the whole universe—the dark, the light, the danger—was reflected there, pulling me back from the edge, tethered by something more than gravity.
Deep-down l really wanted to stay but l would be doing the same whole thing again, putting him second, l just know that am not the right one for him right now and l could only cause him more problems if l stayed , and he won't ever be happy with me, l am not even supposed to touch him, this is more of what they call that forbidden love they have always said about.
And when l glanced over to where his soft but still firm hands were l saw that it was already starting to break out, and l could only just shed one tear and l pushed him away and leapt away from that solarium and jumped on another rooftop which was next to this one which we were in and l stopped to finally say my last to him. But when l turned around l could only see him standing by the pillars of the solarium and crunching chest like as if he was in pain.
And right at that moment l couldn't bring myself to say anything at him, it was indeed the bitterest feeling l have ever felt in my whole life, but this isn't truly the world for me, goodbye Alexander Qin, it was nice knowing you, maybe we will meet in another life and am truly sorry. And with that l disappeared in the shadows and that's when we parted ways for the first time.