It was eight am currently, and Suzume Kagawa was still asleep in her bed. Her black hair lay messy and unkempt, far from its usual neatness. She remained in her pyjamas, despite school starting in less than an hour, something that had become routine ever since what she witnessed a month ago.
A month earlier, during what was supposed to be a peaceful trip, Suzume had gone to a hot spring with her girlfriend, Hoshi. The atmosphere had been calm, almost perfect, until everything shattered in a single moment. Through the drifting steam, Suzume caught sight of Hoshi… not alone. She was with another girl, their closeness unmistakable.
For a second, Suzume couldn't even process what she was seeing. Hoshi's pink hair was soaked, clinging to her face and shoulders, something Suzume knew she hated more than anything, something she barely even tolerated around her. And yet, there she was, completely unaware, completely comfortable… with someone else.
"Hoshi… why? Why would you do this to me…?" Suzume whispered to herself, her voice fragile and unsteady. The memory wouldn't leave her alone. No matter how hard she tried to push it away, it replayed vividly in her mind, Hoshi Itoh leaning into that unknown girl, their closeness unmistakable.
Each time it resurfaced, it felt just as sharp, just as real. Suzume's chest tightened as the heartbreak settled deeper inside her, heavy and inescapable, like something quietly breaking apart piece by piece.
Hoshi never noticed Suzume standing there. Never realized she had been seen. The silence of that moment lingered longer than any confrontation could have. Suzume didn't say a word. She didn't cry, didn't shout, she just turned away. Later that day, without telling anyone, she left the trip entirely and returned alone to her apartment building, carrying the weight of what she had seen with her.
Back in the present, Suzume still hadn't broken things off with Hoshi, but the thought of doing it lingered heavily in her mind, growing harder to ignore with each passing day. Sleep had become a stranger to her. For weeks, she'd barely rested, her nights consumed by the memory she couldn't unsee.
When she finally forced herself out of bed, her eyes were bloodshot, dulled by exhaustion and something deeper and more painful that she just refused to name as if it would hurt her more.
Moving on autopilot, she got dressed for school, buttoning up her collared shirt, pulling a cardigan over it, and slipping into her pleated skirt. Each motion felt mechanical, like she was simply going through the motions of a life that no longer felt the same.
"Why did she do that…? Was I not enough? Was I just holding her back…?" Suzume murmured under her breath, her voice barely above a whisper. Her hands trembled slightly as she checked her phone again, clinging to the smallest hope of a reply. But the screen only confirmed what she already knew, nothing had changed. Hoshi Itoh still hadn't responded.
Fifty missed calls. One hundred and seven messages. All unanswered. Suzume stared at the screen a moment longer, her chest tightening as the silence on the other end felt louder than any words Hoshi could have said.
Her mother knew what had happened as she saw Suzume's face as she walks to the kitchen, but chose silence, not out of indifference, but to avoid reopening a wound that was already too raw. Suzume didn't need questions or reminders. She needed space.
Instead, her mother showed her care in quieter ways. She gently helped fix Suzume's messy hair, smoothing it down with patient hands, and prepared her lunch for school just like she always had, small, familiar acts that spoke louder than words.
Suzume, however, wasn't in the same place. She dragged her feet, her voice low and strained as she complained, "No… I don't want to go. Please… don't make me go." The thought of facing a normal day of pretending everything was fine, felt unbearable, and it showed in every reluctant movement she made.
"Sweetheart, you need to go to school, you'll be late. You don't want to miss the first day of the semester," Suzume's mother said gently as they sat together at the breakfast table. Suzume lowered her gaze, her grip tightening slightly around her utensils before she slowly shook her head. "Without Hoshi… there is no school for me." The words hung in the air, quiet but heavy.
Her mother fell silent, the weight of them settling in. In that moment, she understood, this wasn't something small, not something time would quickly smooth over. Hoshi hadn't just hurt Suzume… she had broken something deep inside her, something that wouldn't heal overnight.
Suddenly, a sharp notification chime cut through the quiet room. Suzume's phone lit up on the table. She picked it up with a faint spark of hope, only to read the message from Hoshi, "We're done. I cheated. I'm already on the plane to Europe. Don't look for me."
The words hit like a slap. For a second, Suzume just stared, the screen blurring as tears flooded her eyes. Without a word, she shoved the phone into her pocket, dragged herself up the stairs, and collapsed onto her bed. Sobs tore out of her, raw and endless, as she cried until her chest ached and her pillow was soaked.
Downstairs, her mother froze mid-motion. She had seen the way Suzume's shoulders slumped the moment she read the text, the sudden lifelessness in her step. Whatever that message had said, it had shattered her daughter even further. Something terrible had just happened, and this time, it wasn't something a mother's hug could easily fix.
Suzume lay curled on her bed like a broken doll, knees drawn tight to her chest. Her long black hair, once silky and perfectly smooth, was now a tangled, tear-soaked mess plastered across her flushed cheeks and the damp pillow. Ugly, choking sobs tore out of her, raw, gasping, ugly crying that left her eyes puffy and red, her nose running, her whole-body trembling with each ragged breath.
Hoshi had been her entire world. Her reason to wake up, to smile, to dream. And now that she was gone, nothing felt worth doing anymore. The thought of getting out of bed, of eating, of facing tomorrow without her… it all felt impossible.
"What's the point anymore?" she whispered brokenly into the silence, voice cracking. "I should just die… or follow her to Europe."
Suzume couldn't stop herself. Still curled on her tear-soaked bed, she snatched her phone with shaking hands and opened the chat with Hoshi. Her thumbs flew across the screen in a frantic, obsessive blur, "Please, Hoshi… come back. I can't do this without you. I'm sorry for whatever I did. Just tell me and I'll fix it. Don't leave me like this. I love you. Please. Come back."
Message after message poured out, pleading, desperate, repeating the same broken promises. She sent them one after another, then stared at the screen, willing the typing indicator to appear. Refreshing. Refreshing again. Nothing. The little "delivered" tag sat there, cold and final.
When the silence stretched too long and the double checkmarks refused to turn blue, something inside her snapped. A fresh wave of sobs exploded from her chest, uglier, louder, more violent than before. Her whole body convulsed as she clutched the phone to her heart, face twisted in pure agony.
Thick tears streamed down her already swollen cheeks, mixing with snot and spit as she gasped and wailed into the pillow, the phone screen glowing uselessly beside her head. Hoshi still hadn't replied. And the silence only made her cry harder.
Suzume sat there for a long minute, phone still clutched in her trembling fingers, staring at the unanswered messages until the screen went dark. She couldn't stay like this forever. With a shaky breath, she pushed herself up from the tear-drenched bed and shuffled toward the bathroom on unsteady legs.
She didn't bother adjusting the temperature. The moment she stepped under the showerhead, she cranked the knob all the way to cold. Freezing water slammed down on her like needles, shocking her skin and ripping a sharp gasp from her throat.
Goosebumps exploded across her own arms and shoulders as the icy stream pounded against her face, her chest, her tangled hair. It stung. It hurt. But that was the point. She stood there, eyes squeezed shut, letting the cold bite deeper, hoping the shock would drag her out of the numb fog long enough to survive the day.
She didn't want to go to school. Every cell in her body begged her to crawl back into bed and disappear. But she had no choice. The Culture Festival was only days away, and she was in charge of half the preparations, booth setups, rehearsal schedules, committee meetings. People were counting on her. So even though her heart felt like it had been ripped out, Suzume forced herself to keep moving.
The day had only just begun, but for Suzume Kagawa, it felt like something far heavier had started with it. What should have been an ordinary morning instead marked the beginning of something darker, something she couldn't easily escape.
The weight in her chest refused to lift, and the world around her felt distant, almost unreal. The question lingered quietly in the air, unanswered, uncertain. Would Suzume find a way to heal from the pain consuming her… or would she remain trapped in the heartbreak that now defined her days?