Chapter 9Chapter Text
Nine
Hermione was tangled in her blankets and her knickers were more than just a little damp when she woke up. Images of the dream danced clearly through her mind, now unfettered, set free by her pursuit of the truth. All she could do at this point was lie back on her bed and groan, resting her forearm over her eyes. There was no hiding from the perfect recall of memory now. Things in that dream had been very clear and left no doubt at all in her mind who it had been about. What was she going to do?
Worse than the damp knickers, was that fact that she ached a little down there, not in pain, but in need, yearning for touch, a wanting, for something or more specifically someone to touch her, to slide fingers between her lips and fill her in a way that she never had been. All she could do was grumble in annoyance as the clock on her bedside showed that it was close to breakfast time and there really was no time right now to take care of that need either in bed or in the shower before food would be on the table. No, she would have to go downstairs and deal with her parents with her nethers throbbing this way, just asking to be touched. All she could hope was that her nipples would play along and not get too hard all on their own to proclaim her state of arousal to her parents. Her robe would help but only so much. She thanked the stars it was not as obvious as it would be on a guy. That would be completely mortifying.
She headed into the bathroom to take care of other needful things and saw the mess that was her hair. It took some concerted effort with her brush and spellwork to get it less tousled bedhead and more respectable. She splashed some cold water on her face which helped cool her ardor a touch and headed downstairs. Her father saw her and smiled, saying, "Morning Hermione."
"Morning Dad."
"Did you sleep well?"
"I slept fairly fitfully." said Hermione, having a seat. She poured herself some tea from the pot, fixing it with some honey and milk just as she liked it. Maybe the little bit of caffeine would help.
"Sorry to hear that. Was there something keeping you up?" Her father put down his paper and looked at his daughter worriedly.
"I… I had a few things on my mind, that's all." said Hermione as she got some toast and spread butter and marmalade on it, trying to avoid eye contact.
Her mother came in and sat down, taking in Hermione's appearance in a quick glance. She asked with some concern, "Trouble sleeping?"
"Yes."
"Well, it's probably nothing more than you just got used to sleeping with Ginny." commented her mother, almost as an aside.
Hermione almost spat her tea everywhere and it was only through the greatest of efforts that she was able to swallow. What was her mother thinking? She set down her cup and asked, "You think?"
"Honestly Hermione, the two of you were sharing the same bed for several weeks. That is certainly enough time for your body to get used to something, especially while sleeping. It probably took a few days to get used to sleeping with her at first and you'll get used to sleeping alone again in a few days. There is nothing to worry about." commented her mother, clearly not worried about this development. She looked over at her daughter with a slight smile.
Hermione could not meet her mother's eyes as she finished her meal. That whole idea was almost too much to deal with, especially with the current revelations and the renewed pulsing in her loins that came back when her mother brought up her and Ginny sleeping together.
Once she was finished eating, Hermione fled upstairs and got dressed for the day, thinking that perhaps going for a walk and reading something somewhere away from home might be a safe plan, at least until her parents left for their clinic so she wouldn't have to face them while thoughts of Ginny molesting her or vice versa ran through her head. She started heading downstairs with her copy of Lord of the Rings so she could have another read through when the doorbell rang. Being the closest to the front door at the moment, she called out, "I've got it."
Wand at the ready and off to the side, Hermione opened the door. There standing on their front stoop was an elderly woman dressed in such an amalgam of fashion types that it clearly screamed wizarding born witch to Hermione. She narrowed her eyes, her combat skills getting ready even though this woman did not seem like an enemy, but she had learned not to judge on appearances. She had clearly seen too much to trust appearances alone. "Can I help you?"
"Ah, yes, Miss Granger, you are just the person I am looking for, may I please come in?" The woman's voice was friendly and welcoming, enough to get most anyone else to lower their guard.
"Who are you?" Hermione asked, still on her guard, her grip tightening on Bellatrix's wand.
"Ah… yes, how forgetful of me. I quite understand. I am Christiana Warbeck. I work for the Ministry, in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Wizengamot Administrative Services, specifically dealing with Last Wills and Testaments. It is a distinct pleasure to make your acquaintance."
The introduction threw Hermione some. She had not expected a Ministry employee to show up at her house. In point of fact, she liked the fact that living a more muggle life kept the magical world away from her for the most part. Daily Prophet reporters did not show and clamoring fans even stayed away, worried about breaking the State Statue of Secrecy. "A pleasure. Come inside please."
She led the woman into the living room, where she motioned to her to sit down. The woman sat and Hermione followed suit. "Would you like me to get you some tea?"
"No thank you. I would rather prefer to get down to business if you don't mind. I am following up on an amendment to the Will of Remus John Lupin that was processed through Gringotts towards the end of April of this year. That was all very legal, proper and managed to nicely dodge the recent unpleasantness. I am here to carry out one of his bequests."
"Professor Lupin left me a bequest?" replied Hermione quite confused.
"Yes he did." She pulled something out of her pocket, set it on the floor. She drew out a wand from her robes and then, with a familiar gesture of her wand and a muttered incantation, the trunk expanded to full size. She handed over a sheet of parchment to Hermione and said, "According to his Will, the bequest is to deliver this trunk to you along with the following message, 'The name is the key.' I do hope that is clear enough to you as no one else in my department has been able to make heads or tails of it and the trunk has some of the most interesting security spells on it I have ever seen, including some I am unfamiliar with."
"Not really." said Hermione. She noticed that the lock had no keyhole, which was intriguing, though given the use of magic not that unusual all things considered. There was surely several different ways to secure a chest with magic. "Thank you though."
"Thank you. Well I must be off. I have a few more deliveries to make today. My work is rarely ever done. There is a sadness to it but it is fulfilling. Thank you so much for… well, for everything really." The older woman seemed a bit at a loss for words, coloring a little.
"You are quite welcome." replied Hermione, glad she had been taking a break from the wizarding world if it meant that there would be more encounters like this. Having people thank her for basically fighting to stay alive seemed like a strange thing. And they seemed so grateful for it as well. She really had no idea how to deal with it. She was getting a much clearer idea of what Harry had been going through all these years.
She escorted the woman out and then returned to the chest, staring at it, cocking her head slightly to the side as she considered it. Her mother came in, took a look at it and asked, "I noticed that you were talking to what looked like a Ministry employee, so I left you alone. What's this?"
"Apparently my old teacher Professor Lupin left me something in his will. It is this chest and clearly whatever is inside." replied Hermione, her eyes never leaving the chest, tracing over the complex pattern of runes and sigils on the metal banding. There were even some interesting runes and such on the wood. This really was a heavily protected object. The wood was a deep rich reddish brown color with dark brown leather straps and what looked like brushed copper or bronze bands.
Her mind was running over the message the woman had left, the name is the key. There is no way that it would be Lupin or Remus, as those names were far too easy to get as anyone would know to use them. That would also eliminate John as well, for obvious reasons. In order to actually secure the trunk it would have to be something private. What name would he use that no one else would know? The only thing that she could think about was… Hermione smiled, leaned down near the lock and whispered confidently, "Moony."
The lock popped open and she was able to lift up the lid, with a broad grin on her face. There were five nested, locked trunk lids in there, with two letters in envelopes with wax seals lying on top, one with her name on it written in Professor Lupin's familiar hand writing, and a key ring with five keys. Keeping the keys locked in there was certainly a way to keep everything nice and secured, except from other Marauders. She picked up the letter and pulled it out. Wondering what he had to say to her to explain this, she opened it with trembling fingers.
Dear Hermione,
You really are the brightest witch of your age and that is something I admire about you. If I am not standing there handing you this than something bad has clearly happened to me. This is not altogether unexpected in a time of war but distressing nonetheless. What I am presenting you with is a temporary loan if you will, until the permanent owner is of age.
What I am giving to you are my private school journals. In these are the details of spells I worked out, pranks we pulled, discoveries we made, how we built the Marauders Map, the mirrors, how the others became Animagi, and many more things. All the secrets of the Marauders are yours, as well as a few other items that I learned after our school days.
I do this not because I owe you, or something like that but rather because of a common bond that I feel you and I share. The two of us are the brains behind our bolder friends. We are the ones who ensure they can succeed. We are the rational voices that keep them from total destruction. We work harder than others and help them to learn the things they need to in order to survive often times themselves. And we are also both scorned by the larger wizarding society for no other valid reason save being who we are. We really are far more alike than we are different Hermione and that is the reason that I knew that I had to let you read these. Great minds should share wisdom after all.
I do ask you though that when Teddy comes of age and heads off to Hogwarts that you dole these out, providing him with the appropriate years journals at the appropriate time. I know I can trust you to do this because you are a true unwavering Gryffindor in the pursuit of what you believe. That way my son can get to know me in this manner and learn lessons that the school never taught.
Take care of yourself Hermione Granger. May you find true happiness and love, even if it occurs for you like it did with me, coming at you from an unexpected place. Do not struggle against it like I did, you will only lose in the end. Remember, you have earned it.
Your friend,
Remus J Lupin
Hermione put down the letter and sat back in her chair, stunned, wiping a few tears from her face. Was she really being given access to the Marauders combined wisdom, well more specifically Lupin's but it was practically the same thing? Despite her original reticence about the Map and some of their ideals, she had to admit some of the things the Marauders had come up with were amazing and had saved their lives quite a few times. If Lupin were the brains behind the Marauders, and after having met Sirius and Pettigrew it was not all that difficult to believe, then this was an incredible gift. There was so much she could do with this, so many ways that she could use this information. But to think that Professor Lupin had thought of her towards the end… he really was a great man.
Taking the key ring, she moved the other letter which read Teddy, and unlocked the first section which opened up to a large section filled with leather bound journals. She estimated that there must be at least forty or fifty of them at the very least. If this part was nothing but journals than what was in the other four sections? Her curiosity was growing and it would certainly need to be sated.
"So this is something good then? You clearly seem pleased." said her mother, trying to understand exactly what it was that her daughter had just received. It looked interesting.
"Mom, Professor Lupin was a wonderful professor that we had in our third year. He was the most helpful Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher we ever had who was very knowledgeable and could teach well. On top of that, when he had been in school he was part of a group of boys, which included Harry' father and Godfather, that were known for pulling elaborate pranks and generally getting away with it. He was the brains behind it all. These are his journals of all the things they had done in school, the magic they had created, everything, as well as a few other things. It is an incredible gift." gushed Hermione looking down at the journals with undisguised lust in her eyes. "And when his son is of age I am to give him the journals and maybe a few other items. So I do get them for a good while. I am quite touched by this."
"You'll make use of this then?" asked her mother with some humor in her voice.
"Oh yes." Hermione pulled out one of the journals at the top. On the first page it read, The Journal of Remus J. Lupin, Age 11, Gryffindor House, Journal 2.
"Well, you have fun with this. Your father and I have to go in to work. Call if you need us." Her mother hugged her and kissed the top of her head.
Hermione had to admit that she did like that her parents were more demonstrative with their affection now as opposed to before. It seemed that the stress of the Obliviation, the overlaid personalities, and recovery had an effect on that part of their actual personalities. She could not argue with this change as she had to admit that she approved. All that time spent with the Weasleys had gotten her much more used to such an emotionally affectionate family and she had come to enjoy it, even crave it to a degree. Her parents even seemed pleased by this change. "Bye mom. I'll be here or if I go anywhere, I will leave you a note or call."
Her parents left the house and she could hear the car driving away. She had found the first journal and she was currently torn. Did she want to start reading these or continue her important research? Without that she could not really figure out what to do and she was sure that she would be interacting with Ginny sooner rather than later. The birthday party for Harry was coming up and if she did not have this issue settled by then it was going to be very uncomfortable for her to be around her favorite red head. Despite this treasure trove at her finger tips that was calling out for her to delve into it, she needed to deal with the more pressing issue.
Reluctantly she dropped the journal back into the chest. This was frustrating but she had a responsibility to herself to solve this particular riddle. If she could do that then a part of herself might fall into place and that would provide some much needed relief. She had not really covered enough of the material to honestly be able to figure anything out with complete accuracy, at least to her standards. However, she had to admit that the more she read the less likely it was becoming that this was either a weird phase she was in or merely an errant fancy. No this did seem like it was a truth but she wanted to be sure. It would not do to for her to leap before looking.
Taking the chest upstairs, Hermione got out her new books and started reading again, one of the other books she had purchased on coming out. As she was going through it, everything kept sounding more and more familiar, like the experiences being described were taken right from her own life, as if some of these experiences were pictures in her own life. She closed her eyes and rubbed the bridge of her nose. Closing that book, she grabbed one of the books she had bought on relationships, reading about some of the issues involved in two women being together. Things seemed to be pretty much the same as any other relationship, but there did seem to be a few incidental differences.
And then she got to a section discussing sex. She started blushing as she read those parts, the parts that talked about the simple and basic aspects of sex for lesbian couples. Her face burned and it was difficult to keep reading, but keep reading she did as she also could not really look away either. She did find herself getting aroused and even a wet as she read more, as her imagination lingered on the descriptions of various practices. Her breathing got a bit rough as she started thinking about red hair, slender arms and lips that she really wanted to taste in terms of those particular sexual sequences. She groaned in want.
With one hand she began to unconsciously rub one of her breasts, her thoughts drifting as she began to picture scenes from her own dreams. It felt pleasurable and her nipple grew erect under her fingers, the moves turning more focused and intentional. Her hand slid down and then up under her blouse, rubbing on the satiny fabric of her bra, occasionally cupping and squeezing, giving her a variety of sensations. Realizing that she might want some absolute privacy while she did this, despite knowing that her parents were at work, she quickly cast a locking spell on the door and a silencing spell to mask any noise she might make.
This felt so good. She had masturbated some while she had been at school, as privacy spells worked well on the drapes of the beds and she had been alone in the Prefect bath a few times. But it had almost always been while she had been fantasizing about Ron or some vague red headed male. It had been good and she had certainly enjoyed getting off, but now it was pictures of the youngest Weasley running through her head and there seemed to be a greater charge to them, more excitement, a much higher erotic charge to everything.
The book, no longer needed, dropped to the mattress and that hand snaked down her body, to unbutton her jeans, sliding down her zipper and slipping into her panties. She was so very wet and the first touch was electric as her finger brushed across her clitoris. It gave her a jolt and she practically gasped at how aroused she was. She dipped into her already deepening pool of wet and dragged it up, to make things more comfortable and easier as she played her fingers over herself, rolling and brushing her clit just the way she liked.
Pictures of her kissing Ginny, of kissing down the girl's neck to the red head's freckled breasts, of running her hands over the curves, over the play of athletic muscles, the taut buttocks, to come around the hip, sliding through curly red hair to dip her own fingers into Ginevra's cleft, to feel the girl's own liquidy slickness rolled through her mind. It made her pant, her head thrown back into the pillows, the speed and pressure of her fingers increasing, her other one pinching and flicking her nipples. The pleasure within her kept building, increasing, and her mind still imagining things, of Ginny kissing her, of pleasuring her, fingers sliding inside, curling within her. As she pictured the redhead smiling up at her from between her legs, warm brown eyes filled with happiness and mischief, Hermione moaned out phrases wordlessly, her body shaking as the climax slammed into her like the Whomping Willow.
Lying there, smelling her own arousal, she just stared at the ceiling, panting, blinking at it, and hand still down her pants. She began chuckling, her body trembling a little with the after effects. That had been, without a shadow of a doubt in her mind, the best wank she had ever had. Her body was still tingling over that, from her head to her toes. "Oh Merlin… I guess this really means that I am a lesbian."
As she snickered, Hermione began to recall her sixth year, in Slughorn's class when she smelt Amortentia for the first time. The smells that had hit her then had been fresh mown grass, new parchment and then she had shut up not saying the third thing she had smelled. When asked about it later she had said it had been spearmint toothpaste but it hadn't. It had actually been the flowery scent of the shampoo that Ginny used and still used. Even the toothpaste she had mentioned had not been too much of a lie, as Ginny used the same brand that Ron used. Had she really been hiding from this realization for that long, maybe longer?
Hermione shook her head and sighed, pulling her hand free, two of her fingers somewhat sticky. Just how long had she been attracted to Ginny? Clearly those feelings were somewhat set enough in her by sixth year to affect her perception of the potion, so had it built while they were working so closely in Dumbledore's Army? That seemed likely. She had spent a fairly good amount of time with Ginny then, working with the girl on various spells and charms. And she had clearly been worried about her over the last year. So now that left her in a much more uncomfortable place: what was she going to do about it? Would Ginny even be interested in her? Was Ginny even interested in girls?
This speculation was going to make her crazy. She had solved one major question but that had only resulted in the creation of many, many others. She needed to actually come up with answers to all of this. But at least she had an answer to one part of this whole tangled mess, but what was she going to do about dealing with all of this? She had to admit that everything she had looked at clearly showed that she was a lesbian. There was no doubt about that. That was huge realization. That on its own was messing with her perception of herself but adding that to her needing to decide what to do about Ginny? And what was she going to tell her parents? It was all enough to make her head spin.
Would they be disappointed in her? Would they want her to leave? Would they be upset with her? Would they still love her? Would they be happy for her? Would they simply smile and say they already knew? After having read about the good and the bad that could come from coming out to those you love, Hermione was a bit scared about the prospect of telling her parents about this. It was a rather terrifying proposition and once you said this thing you could never unsay it. And… and depending on their stance, would that mean that they would not allow Ginny to come back? And what would they think about her being interested in Ginny anyway?
Again there were too many questions to deal with created with too little information to actually answer anything. It was becoming a far too common issue as of late, especially with this particular topic. This was not a trend she approved of as it made her uncomfortable. Why couldn't her life have been easier? Why couldn't she have simply been straight and happy with Ron, living the life it seemed like she had been destined to have? Everything had seemed so much easier when she had been that good little prefect girl in love with Ron. She lifted her left arm and gazed at the scar there, letting her eyes drift over the letters of the word that would never leave her, reminding her of the hate and the why she could never be happy being that girl. Mudblood.
In all honesty, it could just as easily say Lesbian given the way some people saw this issue. Either way it may be a part of who she is but it was not everything about her. She was who she was, a crazy mix of all sorts of things, some that people liked and some that people disliked. No one word or idea was ever going to change her or cage her in or define her. Yes, this entire issue scared her, terrified her by what it could cost, but she had to do what made her happy, what made her free. There really no other option that she could even stomach. Anything less would mean that Bellatrix had won after all.
Chapter 10Chapter Text
Ten
The green flames of the Floo showed Hermione's face poking out through the coals and she called out, "Fleur?"
The part Veela woman came over and smiled down at the girl, "Oui? Bonjour 'ermione, please come through."
Hermione stepped through the flames and ended up in the very familiar Shell Cottage. She went over and hugged the lady of the house. "Hello Fleur. How are you today?"
"I am quite well. 'ow are you?" asked Fleur with a smile.
"Not too bad. I still have some nightmares and some issues with residual pain, but I have been seeing a Healer who specializes in treatment of this sort of thing. It has been helping."
"That is good to 'ear." It was very easy to see the sincerity and relief on the young woman's face.
"Thank you. The Healer told me that your assistance was instrumental to my being as healed as I am. I came over today because I could really use your advice on something and you were the best person I could think of to help me with this." admitted Hermione, with a slight shrug. She then looked around, "Bill isn't here, is he?"
"Non, William is not 'ere. 'e is at work. Are you okay? What is it that you need?" asked Fleur, leading Hermione to the comfortable sitting room, gesturing for her to sit down.
"I… well, I realized something about myself the other day and that only led to more questions and so I need some advice so that I know how best to proceed with things." Hermione's voice shook only a little when she said that. This was making her nervous and she knew that she was only talking in vagaries.
Fleur raised one eyebrow in question and her eyes widened happily. She smiled at the bushy haired girl, "So you 'ave realized it then? That is wonderful. I am 'appy for you."
"Wait, what? You knew?" Hermione was a bit stunned and she sort of fell back into the seat, eyes wide. How could Fleur have figured this out when she hadn't been able to?
"What, that you had feelings for women? Oui. I 'ave known about that since we met at 'ogwarts. Part Veela, remember. I could tell that there was an attraction from you to me. It was not a great draw as it was with some of the males but it was there and I could feel it."
Hermione blushed, looking down at the floor. Fleur had been able to notice her interest that far back? Did that mean that she might have been into Ginny far longer than she was aware? Eyes even wider, her mouth opened and she said softly, "Oh."
"Non, non, do not be embarrassed by this. 'ermione, you are a beautiful woman and that you are attracted to women is no great thing. There are some in the wizarding world who would be upset by this but not all, not even most. Witches 'ave 'ad power for themselves for a very long time and that 'as included who they could be with. There is a reason that 'ogwarts 'as two women founders. This might throw some but do not worry about them." Fleur moved over and hugged Hermione, pulling the girl closer to her.
"Thank you Fleur." Her voice shook a little as these revelations were a bit of a surprise. She had not really been aware of these sorts of aspects of wizarding society because no one really talked about them and there really was no class to educate the muggle born in the ways of their new world. It was completely sink or swim. Maybe she should talk to Professor McGonnagall about that.
"Now, 'as someone captured your eye or your 'eart?" Fleur asked playfully, her voice nice and light.
The blush on Hermione's face deepened and spread down her neck and up into her ears. She could not bring herself to meet Fleur's dark blue eyes. Fleur laughed happily, quite delighted with this, clapping a little, "Oh la la, someone 'as. Oh 'ermione, you must tell me who it is."
"I… you see… its… uhm… I…" stammered Hermione, at a total loss for words. She had no idea how to say this in such a way that would not get her into any sort of trouble. It was a known fact that Weasley's stuck together and Fleur had certainly integrated herself into that family. What would she say if she knew? Fleur had figured out the first thing but saying this part, it was almost impossible for her. She knew that the consequences could be dire but if she wanted the help in dealing with this she had to try.
Fleur looked at Hermione worriedly, almost as if she could read the progression of thoughts, "Really 'ermione, is it that bad? This girl that you 'ave feelings for… who is it? The only way I could think it could be that bad in your mind would be if the person you were attracted to were me or Ginny."
Hermione made a slight strangled noise and looked down at the floor, wishing she could disappear into it. This conversation was really not going like she had thought it would. Fleur was figuring things out and she was not really saying much of anything.
"It is Ginny? Really?" Fleur leaned in and hugged Hermione again. "It is okay 'ermione. Do not fear. I will tell no one about this, not even William. It is your secret to keep."
"Thank you." Some of the stress she had been feeling went out and she relaxed.
"D'accord. You are my friend 'ermione and I know this must not be easy for you. I will 'elp as I can." Fleur rested a hand on Hermione's forearm in a comforting gesture. It really did help her calm down some more.
"I… I have feelings for her, deep feelings, as I smelled her in Amortentia, and I have no idea how to let her know I am interested in her or even if she is interested in me. I… I am so confused Fleur." Hermione lowered her face into her hands and groaned.
"What kind of advice do you want?"
Hermione bit her bottom lip and looked up at the ceiling. She was so nervous and part of her saw this as so hopeless that there was no point in even trying. It was terrifying and she did not know what to do. She closed her eyes and sighed before looking back down at Fleur. "I… I want to be with her Fleur but I'm afraid. I don't want to lose her and I think that if I say anything about this I will lose her. I couldn't stand that. She means too much to me."
"Do you really think that she will deny you, that she will keep you out of 'er life forever? 'ermione, you are 'er best friend, even if it all goes poorly when you confess your 'earts love she will still be there for you. You two 'ave been through so much that I cannot see any way that this will break your friendship. And in terms of 'ow she will treat your 'eart when you 'and it to 'er… you must trust to love." Fleur held Hermione's hands and looked the girl in the eyes as she said this to drive this point home.
"So what do I do? I don't know anything about this and I don't want to be as bumbling as Ron. I have never really been in a relationship like this before or ever had to tell someone how I felt. I have no idea what to do. Any suggestions?" Hermione looked at her a bit desperately.
"Non, but think about Ginny. You know 'er better than anyone else. That alone should make it easy for you to figure out how to approach 'er. What method do you think would actually work? You are very smart 'ermione, figure it out." Fleur tightened her grip and then let Hermione's hands go, patting them before she withdrew them.
Hermione snorted. "I think, you just want to be able to honestly say that you had nothing to do with that part of things if asked."
Fleur laughed a light happy sound. "Oui, there is a little of that, but this is your conquest 'ermione. When one has a conquest like this, especially when it is their 'earts desire on the line they can get advice but they must be the ones to plan things out. It makes the victory all the sweeter."
Raising an eyebrow, Hermione stared at her, trying to read what the blond was not saying. There were a few things in the woman's face that she could sort of read. She slightly cocked her head and asked, "You honestly think I can do this?"
"I think that if you listen to your 'eart and trust in your feelings, using that brain of yours that you can do a great many things. Victory is in your 'ands." Fleur smiled and it did little to assure her.
"So you think I should tell her but do it in such a way that it works to draw her in?" mused Hermione aloud, working out what she was hearing.
"I did not say that."
"No, but that was what you were implying. It does give me something to work with, though it will be a challenge." Hermione gave her a smile that was a bit more sure and confident. Sitting up straighter, she was starting to believe that she could do this.
"And we all know 'ow our 'ermione loves 'er challenges." Fleur giggled after she said that, amused.
Hermione rolled her eyes, shaking her head. "Yes, yes we all know that I do love a challenge and that this will be a pretty tough one as I am scared about it. And I still have to figure out a way to tell my parents about this."
Fleur pursed her lips in thought, "I remember Molly saying that you were going back to 'ogwarts?"
"Yes…" Hermione was unsure where this was leading.
"Then what if you spend the rest of the summer coming to accept this part of yourself, telling your parents a little before you leave about this, giving you time to deal with them before you leave. This lets you talk to Ginny either on the train or at the school, away from other distractions. You would be in a safe place with no other Weasley's to interfere." suggested the silvery blond witch.
Hermione was quiet as she pondered Fleur's suggestion. Was this whole thing really a good idea? If she wanted Ginny to stay over again later in the summer and they slept in the same bed it would be murder, it would be so difficult to restrain herself from caressing the girl she wanted. But if she waited for the train to tell her that she was attracted to girls would Ginny get upset over having slept with her in the same bed? But if she timed everything just right she might be able to actually do this right. It was going to kill her. With a sigh Hermione nodded, "That might work out. Thank you Fleur."
"My pleasure 'ermione. I am always 'appy to 'elp with issues of love." Fleur seemed pleased with how things were turning out.
With another breath to steel herself, Hermione stood, "Well, I should be going while I still have my nerve."
"Oh?"
"Yes. I plan on telling Harry at least about this. At least the part where I like girls. I am not sure Ron will understand but I am sure Harry will. Besides, as the last person to have been after Ginny I kind of feel that I owe him this. If he is good then I won't feel like I am cheating on my friend."
"'arry is a wonderful young man. I am sure 'e will understand after you explain everything to 'im. Thank you for coming over. I am glad that I was able to 'elp." The two young women embraced. They walked over to the fireplace and Hermione grabbed some of the Floo powder that was being stored in a flower pot just like at the Burrow. With a smile Hermione threw it into the fire, announced her destination and stepped into the green flames.
She stepped out of the fireplace at Grimmauld Place and brushed the bit of soot that always seemed to end up on her after a trip off. It wasn't much and she was grateful for that. Dirtier fireplaces left more soot. As she looked around she noticed that the room was quite a bit cleaner and a bit brighter than it had been before. That made her smile. That would surely be helping Harry deal with some of his issues. Kreacher came into the room and said, "Miss Granger, what can Kreacher do for you?"
"I am here to see Harry. Is he in?" asked Hermione politely.
"Master Harry is in the kitchen." His voice was still a bit hollow sounding.
She followed the old house elf deeper into the building. The house elfs attitude was far far better than it used to be. She was looking forward to seeing Harry again. It had been a few weeks since they had talked but she missed him. True, his party was only in a few days, but she wanted to do this away from other people. The fewer people who knew about this the better. Besides, she was still getting used to living without seeing him daily and that was taking some getting used to. It was pretty weird.
She heard voices up ahead and she raised an eyebrow. This was an interesting development. When she entered there was Harry, talking to Luna, and they were sitting fairly close. With a smile at them, she said, "Afternoon you two."
Harry jumped slightly, hand moving towards where his wand was stashed and then relaxed some, "Hermione hello."
"Hello Hermione. Nice to see you again. I should go Harry. It looks like she has something she wants to talk to you about and it is probably important. I will see you tomorrow." Luna rested her hand on Harry's for a long moment and then walked off, resting hand on Hermione's shoulder briefly as she passed. "Take care Hermione. It will be alright."
Hermione turned her head to look after Luna as Harry stood and moved over to the stove, "Want some tea?"
"Sure Harry." She said as she took a seat at the table. "How have you been?"
He poured a cup and set it before her, sitting back down where he had been. "Not bad. Thank you very much for your suggestion about talking to Luna, she really has been a big help."
"Not a problem Harry. I am glad that is working out for you. Luna is a really sweet girl and since talking with her helped me I was sure she could help you. I was really worried about you." said Hermione, reaching across the table to take hold of one of Harry's hands.
"Well the medication and talking to the Healer has been helping. I am still kind of shaky but a lot better than I was. If I remember to take my potions before the party I should be fine. And if I have Luna nearby she might be able to help talk me down if anything happens. I'll even have some potions with me just in case." admitted Harry, squeezing her hand tight and then letting it go.
Hermione raised an eyebrow and smiled slightly, "Growing close to her are you?"
Harry blushed and looked down at the table, trying to turn the conversation away from himself, "Uhm… er… so what's up with you?"
She looked at her cup and sighed, taking a sip, letting Harry change the topic. That he felt the need to do so was interesting and a bit of an admission right there. This was definitely a topic that would need to be pursued later. And the color of Harry's cheeks… oh yes, this topic would have to be revisited. But now it was time to get to the reason for her being here. Steeling her courage, thankful that she had seen signs of Harry being interested in someone else, she began, "Well, you know how I have been going through a lot lately, and changing?"
"Yes. That much has been pretty obvious. And I have to say, I really do like this new look of yours but the things I have seen you in would have been terrible for running from Death Eaters." Harry smirked and snickered some.
Hermione rolled her eyes, "Prat."
"Yeah, but that's why you love me." She reached over and shoved him, making the dark haired boy laugh. "So what is it?"
"Well, a lot of my changing has been because I have been thinking a lot and coming to some realizations. The Manor really made me look at things differently, shook me up and made me see that I was living my life for other people. And because I determined to live my life my way I have decided to follow up on my new realizations." Stated Hermione, staying vague, even though she knew it was not going to help Harry understand her.
"Okay." Harry stretched the word out, making it clear that he was following along but not entirely sure what she was saying.
"Well, the thing is… what I wanted to talk to you about is… well, you see Harry, I realized something a few days ago and honestly… it has shaken me up. I wanted to talk to you about this, because, well, it kind of changes my life a fairly good amount." Hermione kept talking around the topic, still unsure what to say.
"What is going to change your life?" She could tell that Harry was starting to get all protective, like he usually did. It was endearing but now was really not the time.
"You can't tell Ron this, as I know he wouldn't understand. I know I will tell him about this at some point but I have no idea what to say to him. You have to promise me Harry." Hermione was quite adamant.
"Alright, alright, I promise. Do you need a Wizard's Vow or something? You know, you actually haven't said anything to me yet." grumbled Harry.
"Sorry. I just had to get that out. This isn't really easy to say. I… uh… so, Harry… I just need to let you know that I'm… well… I'm… a lesbian." Hermione's voice grew quieter as she went along.
Harry blinked a few times as if he were trying to make sense of what Hermione had just said. He leaned forward and looked her in the eyes, his green eyes more intense. "Wait… did you just say that you were a…"
She just sighed and closed her eyes, rubbing her forehead in frustration. "Yes Harry I did."
"But you… Ron? I thought you two were going to…?" Harry was clearly confused, trying to process all of this.
"Now you see why I don't want you to tell him. He wouldn't understand and I bet he still thinks that we are going to get back together. If he found out that I liked girls he would get upset. I don't want to do that to him. We don't need to fight again and especially not over this." said Hermione, her eyes pleading with her best friend.
He held her gaze and then nodded, giving in to what she was asking. "Okay, so you are into girls. Wow… You know that is really going to take some getting used to."
Hermione shook her head and said lightly, "Think of it this way Harry, now we have something else in common."
With a groan Harry said, "Hermione that was terrible. That was almost as bad as something Ron would say. Why would you say something like that?"
Snickering, her grin huge, Hermione said, "Well I have been hanging around you two idiots for seven years, so I guess your sense of humor may have rubbed off a little bit."
"Thanks a lot. It's our fault… again. Great. So, what brought this about? Is there a girl you fancy?" asked Harry honestly, looking like he was honestly trying to accept and deal with this new development.
Hermione blushed a little as she thought about Ginny and how she kept appearing in her dreams. "Uhm…"
"So there is." chuckled Harry, enjoying the slight squirming that Hermione was doing. This was a change from the usually cool and collected girl he was far more used to seeing.
"I… uh… well you see… uh… yes." She was finding it a little difficult to look Harry in the eyes.
"So are you going to let me know who it is?" asked Harry casually.
"I… I'm not sure. Do you really want to know?" asked Hermione, pleading with her eyes that the answer would be no.
"Merlin Hermione, I was only teasing you, but if it is affecting you that much then it has to be someone we know. A stranger wouldn't get you this tangled up." Harry sat up a little straighter and peered at her closely as she fidgeted under his gaze. "I'm right, aren't I?"
Hermione looked up at him with a slight look of desperation on her face. She really didn't want to do this. "Harry… I haven't even told her yet Harry, don't you think that's a bit unfair?"
"Nope. I'm your best mate so I can help you get her. That's what best mates do for each other. You helped me so now I am helping you. I mean, how do I even know if she is good enough for you? Only the very best for my Hermione." said Harry, looking all proud and brotherly.
"Urgh…" Hermione lowered her face into her hands. How did she get into these messes? True she should have expected it with Harry as she kept forgetting that he really was quite smart and able to put pieces of things together rapidly when he was actually paying attention. It would make sense that he would be able to figure out some of this. Thankfully he was not able to figure out all of it, unlike Fleur. Should she tell him? Since he had been after Ginny for so long would he get upset? But he seemed to be currently interested in Luna if she was able to read things correctly, else he wouldn't have stammered so much and tried to have changed the topic. Should she take a chance? They were friends, the best of friends. Surely he would be able to see that despite what she was going to tell him. After all he seemed fine with things so far. After all they had been through after all these years he might get a little bit angry with her but he would never abandon her over this… right? "Fine, I'll tell you who it is but I want to state right now that I am telling you under duress. If it shocks you or freaks you out remember that you asked for this. Don't get mad at me for this Harry James Potter, it's not like I can control who I am attracted to."
"Oh man, now you really have me concerned. Who is it? Oh Merlin… it's not McGonnagall is it? Please tell me it's not McGonnagall!" Harry actually looked rather terrified that his guess could be true.
"Harry! She's a teacher!" Hermione was quite affronted at the suggestion that she would be in such a relationship. She wanted to smack him and barely restrained herself. "And she is older than my parents. It would be like dating my grandmother."
"Right, right, sorry, so I guess that means that Miss Pince is out as well. So who is it? I mean, I can't imagine you with any of the Slytherins and you have wanted to smack Cho forever, so it can't be her. There are a couple of cute Hufflepuffs but I just don't see it. No… I'm at a loss. Please you have me on pins and needles here Hermione. You have to tell me who it is." pleaded Harry looking a touch desperate, even if a touch of it was just an act.
She took a deep breath and looked at her left forearm "Fine… I'll tell you. It's… it's Ginny." said Hermione, looking down at her tea and then taking a drink to fill the sudden silence.
There was a long moment of silence that sat between them before Hermione looked up. Harry looked completely shocked by this admission. His eyes were wide and he looked a little like he had just been hit in the back of the head with a board. As the silence stretched out longer, Hermione began to get nervous and fidget some. This was not a good reaction. He blinked a few more times and then he asked in a voice filled with disbelief and confusion, "Ginny? Ginny Weasley?"
"Yes Harry, Ginny. Ginevra Molly Weasley. We don't know any other Ginny's. That is who I fancy. Oh Merlin, I am such a headcase." Hermione lowered her head to the table and groaned.
Out of all the response she had posited, she had not expected Harry to start laughing. These were not small titters or giggles, no these were the deep belly laughs of someone deeply amused. He was laughing as if he had been hit with a tickle jinx, and eventually fell off the bench and onto the floor. As he was laughing she could hear him gasping out as few words, "Headcase… fancy… Ginny…"
She banged her head on the table a few times, hoping that would give her some sort of relief. It didn't. She groaned in annoyance and complained, "Honestly Harry."
As he was trying to catch his breath and control himself, pulling himself to his feet, Harry said, "No, no, I'm good. Oh man… thank you. I needed that. You, Hermione bloody Granger, a headcase. That's rich. Oh man… so funny. And you know… thinking on it, I think I actually get you and Ginny, I really do. She kind of… you know… fits. She is more like you than Ron ever was, since she actually does her schoolwork without copying, but she still has that element of life and adventure that you seemed to like in our favorite prat that brought you out of your shell. No, I really can see it. And there is no question that she is good enough for you. She is too good for me, so at least the better woman can get her. No Hermione, you go get her. I approve."
"Harry, I haven't told her how I feel. She might… she might reject me." Hermione sort of pulled into herself as she shared one of her deepest fears. It made her fell so vulnerable and fragile when she said that and she hated feeling that way. The slightest thing could possibly break her when she was this exposed.
He scoffed and shook his head, waving his hand dismissively, clearly finding her fears groundless, "Someone reject Hermione Jean Granger, not going to happen. Look, if it weren't for the fact that you are practically my sister, I might even go after you."
Hermione came around the table and hugged Harry tight, resting her head into the crook of his neck, trying to fight back the tears that were fighting to rise up. "Thank you. That really means a lot to me. Do you really think she would be okay with this? With the idea of us?"
"I think so. I mean, she was team mates with Katie Bell who was really, really close to Leanne Spinks, who was in Hufflepuff, if you know what I mean. That particular relationship was kind of an open secret, at least amongst us players. Also she follows the Holyhead Harpies, which has a couple of players who happen to be lesbians. There are a couple of others in the league as well. So, this is probably not going to be something that really throws her. This is something she is aware of and knows. That part should be fine. As for the part where you fancy her… all I can say is you're on your own for that." said Harry, offering up some of his sage advice.
"Why are you such a git?" Hermione glared at him in mock anger.
"Well, according to Snape it is clearly genetics." His eyes went from playful to saddened.
Hermione hugged him again, remembering what they had learned about the former potions master earlier that year and how it had changed everything. She smiled softly, "Well, Snape would know from gits, wouldn't he?"
Harry snorted and replied somewhat fondly, looking off into nowhere. "Yeah, that he would."