Jay's Pov
After he went I was still sitting on the couch and I wiped my tears and got ready because I had to leave for the office,
I got in the company car and went to the office and sat in my cabin next to Sara, she started speaking to me,
Sara: "So how was the date week?" She asked with a hint of teasing, then I turned my face and she actually saw my face, the dull one with red eyes with tears,
Sara: "Hey, What happened?"
I couldn't say anything, I just hugged her, she hugged me back,
Sara: "Is everything okay? Why are you crying?" She asked while patting my back
I couldn't speak anything, I was just crying and soon it felt like people were starting to look our way, before the everyone saw us, Sara took me towards the roof top, where no one was present,
Sara: "Ash, now please calm down and tell me what happened" she asked wiping my tears,
I took a breathe in before replying,
Jay: "I hurt him again" I say while crying,
Sara: "Why? What happened? you guys were spending time together right?"
Jay: "It was perfect the whole week felt like a dream, both of us were happy and today I ruined it"
she wiped my tears again before I continued to speak,
Jay: "He asked me to move in with him this morning"
Sara: "Okay that's a good thing what did you say?"
Jay: "I fell silent when he asked me the question and said I need time and space"
Sara: "But why? I know for a fact that both of you love spending time with each other"
Jay : "I haven't told him about that incident or my nightmares and midnight panics"
her expression changed when I said that,
Sara: "You haven't had nightmares when are with him?"
Jay: "Not yet"
Sara: "Does he knows anything about this?"
I nodded my head in no,
Sara: "Do you want to tell him?"
Jay: "I have to, he deserves to hear it"
Sara: "He will always be there for you no matter what"
Jay: "I know, but there is chance what I am about to say might change things and hurt him again "
Sara: "All that matters is you love him and he loves you"
I nodded my head and try to put up a smile,
that's when she received a text,
Sara: "Its time for our meeting"
Jay: "Let's go" I said calming myself down and wiping my tears,
she just gave me another hug before went downstairs for the meeting,
Everyone was settled in the meeting the waiting for Keifer, he walks in and gives everyone a nod before sitting down, but I know him he isn't normal, he doesn't give any side glances and strictly focused on the meeting, It was like he was not trying to look my way, because if he did he will loose it or is he just giving me space that I asked for, I know he must be overthinking the situation.
The meeting came to an end and he stood up and was about to leave without a glance and I wasn't ready for it but he did look at me unlike I said for split second before leaving, Everyone returned to their cabin and so did but I wasn't focused on my work because I couldn't, I felt anxious and nervous. I was looking at his cabin from time to time, but he didn't look at me, I understood he was busy but I was also scared if had hurt him too much, I couldn't shake the thought out of my mind.
The day finally came to an end,
Sara: "So, what are you going to do?"
Jay: "I have to talk to him"
Sara: "So go to him"
Jay: "Not here"
Sara: "Are you going to wait?"
Jay: "Yeah but you leave"
Sara: "Okay, call me immediately if you need anything and don't worry nothing is going to change between you guys"
I nod and barely give her a smile,
I wait for him but he still inside
he finally looks at me in the eye after the whole long day and its tired and also scared, he does not speak,
Jay: "We need to talk, but not here"
he nods his head and both of us move towards the elevator and get side, we are standing beside each other yet I don't know why it feels like we are far away, neither of us speak there is silence which feels heavy,
We get out and was about to get in the car and I speak again,
Jay: "I'll drive"
he just hands me the keys over without a word probably because he was too tired, I drive out of the city, I finally reach out of the city and I stop the car and there is no one around here, I get down and so does he,
I stand and start speaking looking at him,
Jay : "Keifer, I am sorry"
he opens his mouth to speak something but I interrupt him by saying,
Jay: "No, let me talk I have a lot of things to say and I don't know what is going to happen or how are you going to react so let finish talking" I take a deep breathe before speaking again,
Jay: "When you asked if wanted to move in with you, It is something that I would love to happen really but I hesitated because there are somethings I haven't told you yet, and this morning I did not have the courage to open up but I think I built up some of it,
Keifer you know how I came here after the incident but you don't know what happened, I came here I really struggled I had to find a job before I run out the money I had in hand and I tried really hard to finally found one and I thought maybe one problem came to an end but it wasn't, it was just the start"
I couldn't control my tears, it started pouring in the middle,
"I got a job in MNC after so much struggle and I wanted to prove myself, So I will do everything within my power to do my job perfectly, You know how I used to stay back here even after working after just so I could complete my work, I used to do that there too and it being my first job I was still scared What if do Some mistake and they will remove me, and just like one day I stayed back to complete my work, I did not realise when but I feel asleep and then my manager woke me up, he was also my mentor, I really thought he was good person,
I woke and stood he gave me a smile and I returned, then I tried to move he blocked my way and then I looked at his face,
He was smiling at me in creepy way and I got scared and,
J: "Sir, I have to leave"
S: "What's the rush dear? I will drop you"
He said and held my hand tightly,
I tried to remove his hold on my hand,
J: "Sir please leave me, Please" I started begging him but he moved closer tried to force himself on me, I tried so hard but he didn't move, he ripped off the sleeve of my dress, I shouted for help but no one came then with all my strength I pushed him and tried to run, but he caught and pulled me by my hair and pushed me to the floor, I sat on the floor
S: "You are trying run from me"
J: "Sir please leave me please"
He just laughed at me creepily and touched me, I felt like dying on that time itself, I tried to push him but he was strong, he was forcing himself on me and then before anything could happen, I saw a pen lying on the floor, I took it slowly without him noticing and poked him on the eye and ran immediately from there."
Before even I could finish the sentence Keifer tackled me in a hug and I was crying I wasn't able to control my emotions anymore,
Keifer: "I am sorry, Sorry , Sorry" he kept repeating continuously while both of us cried,
Jay: "You know what happened after that, I came out of the office and ran to my apartment, I was even scared to take any mode of transport and I came and went straight to the shower, I tried to sit under the shower as if trying to erase what happened to me, I did not feel safe and I did not have you by my side, I honestly wanted to die that day."
He closed my mouth with his hands and nodded a no while tears falling from my eyes.
He understood I needed to speak more, so he removed his hands from my mouth,
Jay: "I think stayed in shower for so many hours I don't remember, then I finally came out I fell sick and I started shivering and I laid in my bed and tried to sleep but I couldn't I keeps seeing the guy trying to force himself on me, I couldn't move from my place, I also did not anyone from this place since I was still new here, I met Sara only recently but since I did not have anyone I called her help to take me to the hospital and she did but I did not say the real reason, She helped while I was sick and took care of me, then one day I was still recovering and I was home alone and I slept for some time and I started having nightmares about it, when I woke up, I will all sweating and shivering,
I was starting to get panick attacks just thinking about and then I finally said Sara about it and she helped me and both of us changed companies and I was still recovering from the incident but the nightmare and panic attack keeps continuing, in the course of time I got used to it. But it is still there that fear,
You remember the day when you touched me when I was asleep and I shouted at you, I didn't shout at because I was angry at you, I shouted at because I started remember the awful incident that happened, That is why I said those words to you,
And this whole week when I was with you, I felt safe and I did not have the nightmare and panic attack which was miracle, or maybe because I know I am with you, I feel safe.
But I don't know when it will return and once we move in together you will eventually find out about it, I don't want to live together while having secrets,
I don't want to keep any secrets between us that could change anything between us,
I was scared to tell this to you because I don't know how you will react to this, I just.."
Author's Note
Longest chapter I have ever written, Please show some love🤍
Jay's horrible incident in the past🥲
What's Keifer going to do?
Jay doesn't want secrets between them but still Keifer has some🫣
What's going to happen next?
Comment your thoughts because it motivates me to write faster and I will upload soon💗✨
Hope you guys liked the chapter🤍