In shibuya...
Neon lights flicker onto the night streets of Tokyo.
"Oh I think I'm here." Hanabi said looking over a address on her phone, I think so... I should find out from the music, but I don't hear anything... She thought, Is it in front of this building?
Okay... "I think, I already saw it. She looked up ahead from her phone, I don't know exactly is it that place or not, just where the hell, Mai and others are?"
"There is that the building?" She looked at the sign, Seems so, Club Aragon... Than her gaze goes at the Reze, leaning against a wall outside the club probably waiting for someone. "It's Reze senpai, should I go and say, Hi to her?" Wait... she thought. Who is she waiting for tho?
"Huh. Sen–kai, Yoshimura Senkai. "Why is he meeting with the senpai? And here late at night on top of it." Wait, wait I have to follow them to find out?"
I'm getting very nervous... She saw both of them going inside. Let's hide here... Huh, waittt are those two going in there too?" Hm.. She said, I didn't follow them I was just going to the same place as them."
She looked extremely interested. I'm not exactly following them, because I'm curious, she said to herself. it's just that... I'll happen to have a date at that same exact place too.
Following them she took a step ahead. "Oops, than she thought, they might see me so, it be better to go after a bit...!"
———
Few inches later...
"Inside the club's Private room."
Today I had a meetup with the friends. I came across two people from my club, I know they are having a secret meeting. She thought, and so it happens that those two are having the secret meeting right in the very next room. And what kind of relationship thay had between those two?
Than while putting her ear onto the walls of the room trying to listen what is happening in the other room. Mai shouted! "Heyyy, seriously what nonsense are you doing Hanabi! Haha... other friend of her chucked. "Don't mind, excuse her, sometimes she's just weird."
The group of boys laugh, "it's all right...
Than Hanabi continued. And today I will discover the truth, of this bastard junior of mine, Senkai Yoshimura...
———
"Inside the other room."
The room was pretty luxurious, quiet, the sound proof walls, a tv, and low couch against the side dimmer lights. "... Senkai sat at a couch, Reading around the room, conspicuously. His eyes went left to right of the room. "Hey..! why the hell did you sit so far away from me!?" She said.
"I can't see anyone else?" He said.
She coughed slightly than while rearranging her hair's strands back, and nervously playing with them in a low voice she continued."Okay. I'm sorry, I lied to you, when I message you that the rest were also coming to eat..."
"..."I, ...I just felt lonely, she said than her voice back to normal her sweet tone. "So... You hate me just because I wanted to see the face of my dear junior? And you quickly left in the morning, so I just thought."
His face unreadable again, he stared at her for a second. "if you wanted me to come, he said. You just had to tell me, why lie to me that there were other people coming?" Her ear went red back of her head. "I just thought that. You wouldn't come."
He frowned, Eh?" She said, fine... "I just thought that, you wouldn't come if I said to meet just the two of us! That's why I lied to you! Happy." He said, "I see you are being very honest!
"Good. He nodded, I like it , ... And how did you know I wouldn't be coming?"
Switched in Chinese, "Cuz I knew from the way you were acting in the morning, she muttered annoyingly. "Since we are here why not start ordering, since I took you time order what ever you like," she said back into Japanese while taking a sip of her beer.
"Did you just get angry? Because I laughed?" He asked. "Aruhh! By scaring to hit him by the beer bottle she said. "Should I show you, what's it is to be angry." He raised his hands in defense. Ok, okay, I get it, forgive me!"
She put the beer glass down at the table, and scoffed, Hump. "Come and sit down here at my side," she said, while pointing her eyes at the empty space. "Yes... He said, getting up than sitting beside her. "So, for you to come by my side, I needed to use violence, She muttered.
"Heyy, by the way, ...do you know why I told you come here?" He looked at her, "Huh. I have no idea, why would I know what's going in your head."
A pause maybe a silence in the room.
Hm.. she continued. "You why do you look so calm as if nothing had happened?" In front of the women you confessed to and had sex with?"
She studied him carefully, "You're being cold."
He didn't react immediately. Just tilted his head slightly. "I am?" she short back, "Yes." He said, calmly. "No, I'm being especially normal, I've believe." And that irritated her more than she expected.
She gets closer. "Last night," she said quietly, "You weren't normal." He held her gaze, "Neither were you." The air shifted. She closed in stopped at an arm's length away from him. Close enough to test. But not touching.
"You left quickly after class, she continued, without looking at me." He said, "That's what people do after an class ends. She short back, "You didn't answer my question? He replied back, "You didn't ask one."
Her eyes sharpened, and He was deflecting it. Not avoiding. Not flustered, but controlled. She leaned in closer still. "You think I'm playing with you." No. He replied evenly, "I think you like controlling the pace,"
A small silence.
She reached up close slowly meeting his gaze and closes in to his neck as she said. adjusting the collar of his shirt as if something invisible bothered her, fingers brushing fabric, then his skin.
He didn't move. But his breathing changed, "Does this feel like control?" she asked softly. Her voice lowered, Intentional, Measured as always.
He watched her. "You're testing something." And? she said. "And I don't like being an damn experiment," He said. Than for the first time, something flickered across her face.
Maybe Annoyance? Or a surprise?
She moved even closer, their proximity was now impossible to ignore. "You kissed me," she reminded him. "You were the one who seduce me and leaned in first," He said. "You told me to walk toward you," she short back. "And somewhere you did, he replied back evenly, Your being is here is the prove of it."
Silence thickened between them.
She leaned back a bit and sighed heavily.
Then she said it— "You don't actually like me Senaki.
"His expression hardened slightly. What? she continued calmly, "You're just attracted to me, and that's different." He said, "and that's your conclusion?"
"Yes." She stepped back half a step as she now sat at the other corner of the couch. picking her drink up again while sipping it she continued. You don't want me emotionally senkai, but you just want the idea of me."
"You might just want me as a thing maybe to show off to your friends, or just to ease your introvertness, or loneliness. Cuz most people's who wanted me are like that, they just don't understand it, they misstook it for the feelings, I just don't want you to do that Senkai."
He stood up slowly now, and "You talk like you're certain." She said, cuz I am. He continued, "and what if it's not like that, I'm not like that?" what if I just don't want you because of something like that, but just to love you."
Love? She held his gaze, "Just what is love? Huh. Tell me Senkai." He paused for a moment. "Don't know." He said as he sat back, "But I believe it's something that you might even be willing and ready to do the impossible for."
A near silence...
Hm.. "Then prove it," she said.
A challenge, always a challenge.
She puts the empty glass down at the table than move toward him, and she said, crossing one leg over the other. "Ready to do impossible for. You said. Fine than, If you're still confused about your feelings," she said lightly, "we can make it simple, let's be a sex partners for a while.
He didn't like the direction this was going. "You think this is just physical?" No. she said, "but treat it as physical." He frowned faintly. "What are you suggesting?"
She met his eyes directly, simple, "No emotions. No drama. No pretending." Her tone stayed smooth. "We figure it out without pretending that if it's a love or not."
The implication hung in the room. His jaw tightened. "And you think that's clarity?"
She short back, "I think that's more honest."
Senkai let out a quiet breath through his nose. "You're running away Reze," he said meeting her eyes. "From what?" Her eyes narrowed. He said. "From the possibility that it is not just physical and that you like me enough to seduce me twice by now."
That somewhere hit but she masked it quickly. "You're overestimating yourself, She said. "And you're underestimating your own feelings, he said slightly lowering his eyes. I believe."
A sharp silence stood in the room.
She again, leaned toward him again, stopping inches away from his lips. "If I kiss you right now, she said softly, would you stop me?" He looked down at her, the tension between them was undeniable but he didn't lean in. "I wouldn't stop you if you did," he said honest.
A flicker of victory sparked in her eyes. "—but I wouldn't respond either." and that extinguished it. The rejection wasn't loud, It was steady, and Grounded, and that unsettled her more than if he had pushed her away that moment. "You... think you're above this?" she asked quietly.
"No," he said, "I just don't want something that's half ass." Her lips parted slightly. "If you're confused about your feelings, that's fine. But don't reduce it to something convenient like that."
She laughed once — but there was no humor in it. "You're naïve." He said, "Maybe, but least I'm not uncaring."
That word landed. "Uncaring."
She searched his face for something impulsive. Something reckless, But he was steady. "I'm not cold," he said more quietly. "I'm just careful about this thing we have, about you and everything we went through."
The room felt smaller suddenly for a moment just for a moment, A beat in her heart.
She looked away, she hadn't expected him to reject the offer, but she had expected him to show desire, she had expected him to lose control. But Instead he—
He chose distance, and that bruised her pride more than she anticipated. "You're scared," she said finally. "Of what?" he said. "Of wanting me." He leaned back slightly. "No," he said calmly, I'm just scared of wanting something real from someone who treats it like a rehearsal."
The words of his silenced her completely.
The words weren't cruel. But they were honest, and honesty—she had asked for that, hadn't she? The glass on the room reflected them sitting beside each other now. "Not touching, "Not acting. But just two people sitting in a room that was meant for pretending.
He got up, grabbed his bag. "We should have dinner some next time. When we're not arguing about the things we both won't admit." He said than walked to the door, before opening it he paused.
Without turning back, He said. "I don't just lust after you, Reze or look at you like the other guys do." Then he left, the door clicked shut, and for the first time in a long while—
Reze sat alone in a Club room… thinking, about his words, "Love. she said?"
She realized something sitting alone drinking, thinking that night, that she had lost control of this narrative relating to Yoshimura Senkai ages ago...
———
Saturday...
"In college canteen."
Hanabi sat with the dark circles in the eyes. Yui asked, "What happened to you senpai?" Hanabi said, "Nothing, I was just trying to... A quiet sight left her lips. Forget it," she muttered.
Rina continued. "Remember the newbie and the president." Hm.. Asuza said, What about them. She continued quietly. "I heard Rya and Reze senpai talking... In the club room alone about the Reze senpai's new one night it's seems to be a junior this time."
Hanabi shouted, getting up quick. "What?" She looked around as if to make sure no one else is listening. "They seems to have a one night after the freshmen welcome party," Rina said. "What? Hanabi muttered without thinking, this is why they were meeting alone at night if i am not wrong."
Than Oops... Hanabi said, putting hand at her mouth. Asuza said nudging her. "Hanabi what do you know tell us." Hanabi muttered. "Nothing much... I just saw the senkai and Reze senpai meeting together last night..."
"I'll was curious so, I was waiting last night to caught them, but at last Reze senpai came out alone." Hm... Asuza said, seems like Reze senpai has got the new target." Senna asked. "Target?"
Yui her face didn't seem right but she didn't said much either. "Oh you don't know, Asuza said, Ah right you are a fresh man too, I forgot. Just don't tell anyone one else outside of the club."
If you don't want your life turn to ashs and ruin, but Reze Senpai is dangerous, there are rumors about her that she toys with the Hearts of the innocent boys of our college right. Yui."
Hm... Yui nodded. Senna suddenly remembers her back than, after the play of orientation day. How she called it even with the bag of a luxury clothes. "she is mean, she muttered, don't know but she seems to hate me."
"I'm mean we don't know what goes in and out of her head, Rina said. But let's not talk about our senior like this behind her back girl's..." Asuza shouted! "Hey did you forget. You were one who started it." Rina said putting a hand at her mouth. "Oh.. did I...
Yui says "I need to go, see ya... senpai's. Senna."
———
"Architecture department."
After the college, corridor was a lot quieter now. Students drifted away in small groups, laughter fading down the stairs. "Senkai turned, Yui stood near the window, one hand resting on her bag strap, her expression wasn't sharp. But It wasn't defensive either, but It was steady.
"You got a minute there?" she asked.
Senkai nodded, than he excused himself form the seniors and walked close to her. "Remember I said, I have something to told you before, she said. "Hm... Yeah, He said. "I believe I should tell that to you now as fast as I could," She said.
"Sure. He said, If it's really that important." They moved a little aside, out of the main flow of the people's. Than stood at a quiet corner. She didn't rush her words, carefully, "See... I'm not here to gossip," she said first. "And nor do I have some personal Jealously through wards Reze Senpai."
"What you say?" He said. "I know. I might sound like, I hate her or something, she continued. but I want to be clear." Her tone was calm almost practical. "You're getting closer to the Reze Senapi, Right?"
He didn't confirm it. Didn't deny it either. Instead "So?" He said. Yui exhaled softly, "Then I'm going to say this as your friend." He waited. "You can't handle a women like her. You're not built for the messy attachments."
That made him glance at her properly. "What does that mean?" She said, "I know you are not like that, even though you show, you don't care, you help people's out, you are nice, you don't have that wide of a circle,"
"You don't ask anything in return. You don't jump between people's either. Than her voice slower now. And, when you give someone your attention, it's whole hearted, and deliberate. If you attach to someone. it won't be halfass. I know that." He didn't argue back.
"You don't let people in easily either," she added. So, I know, when you do… it matters a lot." Her words weren't dramatic, but they were very observant. He said quietly, "I used to think I am the one who unusually read the room, but all this while... seems like you were the one who was observing me."
Than glanced at her. "And?" she said, "and Reze is not halfass either, Senkai." Her voice quieter and lower now. "She had someone before, do you know that," Yui said after a pause. "Lemon, Lemon kanawa. He is our fifth year business department senior."
The name settled quietly between them. "I know he said, she had told me once." Yui frowned. "You shouldn't get too close to Reze Senpai," she said finally.
He sighed lightly, "You too?" She short back, "No this isn't like that." He asked, "Like what?"
"I know him. He was her boyfriend, they were serious, at least she was. I know that much for sure." There was no accusation in her tone now, but Just concern. "And? He asked. "He rejected her," Yui added, and it messed her up more than the people think."
Senkai listened quietly, His expression remained neutral. "It hit her harder than people think," Yui said, she doesn't show it, but after that… she had changed. She wasn't always like this," Yui continued. "she used to be more softer, gentler, and more open, but after that.
"People change," he said. "Yes, she agreed, but not always in nicest and healthier ways." she leaned back against the wall. He was looking out the window. "After Lemon senpai, she stopped trusting. She gets close to guys, but it's never serious."
She has started controlling everything around herself. As If whenever she feels like it's getting real, or them getting attached, she pulls away, than she turns it into something lighter, or colder."
She looked out the window for a second before continuing. "She's not a villain, Yui clarified, but she's unresolved." And he understood that more than he let on. "And in your case, Yui continued, that's dangerous."
"Why me specifically?" he said. "Because you're not built for the casual damage," she said. Her words were blunt, but gentle. He tilted his head slightly. "Unresolved how?"
"She doesn't fully let go of him. Yui continued, Not emotionally." He didn't interrupt. "There are rumors," she admitted. "Rumors," he repeated. Which kind?" He asked. That she toys with the people's hearts, hook them up, uses them, than she drops them.
"I'm not saying every story is true, but patterns exist for a reason. plus sometimes she uses the attention to prove something to herself, Yui added. And the guys who get involved they just think they're special. Then they realize they were just a part of the distraction."
He said. "And you think I'll be one of them. she hesitated. "I think you'll fall even harder, the honesty in her voice was disarming. "And you don't want that for me," he said. "No, she said quickly.
He asked "Why?" She stared at him for a second, "Because you're my friend. It wasn't dramatic, It wasn't romantic, but it was simple. You don't let people in easily," she continued. "If you let her in and what if she walks away? You'll close up even more I know that."
He looked down briefly cuz he knew she wasn't entirely wrong. "But you're assuming that she will," he said calmly. she short back. "I'm just assuming based on patterns."
He leaned against a opposite wall. Lemon might be her past, he thought. And if I want her in my future, I can't pretend she didn't have one. Yui frowned slightly. "You look too calm about this."
He said, "I'm thinking." she said softly. "That's what worries me more, when you decide on something, you don't back out just like back than in the highschool."
He didn't deny it. "You're not curious?" she asked. "About what?" He continued. "About what he did to her? That why she'd changed so much?" Her eyes shifted slightly. "I am," but...
Than her eyes gone at his face and she thought. Ah... There it was... senkai and his damn stupid, curiosity, no jealousy, nor anger but Just a quiet interest...
———
"I don't want you getting involved with someone like her." I warned you, she said. "Lemon," he muttered. "Yes, Yui said. "She still loves him? He asked. Yui admitted honestly. "I don't know, but I know she hasn't got over him, or erased him."
That honesty mattered. Instead, "Why tell me this now?" He asked. "because I'm worried. I'm not trying to control your choices," she added. "But I just don't want you walking into something blind."
"And her she is dangerous stay away from her... Your curiosity is fine and all, but make sure not to fall for her," Yui said. But little did she knew he had already confessed to her and got short down.
He leaned lightly against the wall. "And if I'm not blind?" She studied him. "Are you?"
He thought about Reze's guarded tone. Her need to define everything as physical. The crack in her composure when he didn't chase. "I'm really curious," he admitted. "Curious about her?" She asked. "Yes, He said.
"Or about her and Lemon?" She asked just to confirm her doubt. That made him glance at her again. "Both." he said, she nodded slowly. "If you want to know her and his story she said.
"Then understand what you're signing up for. He didn't flinch at that phrasing. What does that mean? He asked. "Get ready for a punch from the lemon senpai in your face."
"What? He frowned. Where did that come from?" She continued. "You don't know he hit very hard, Watchout." She said. Than he thought, she was different before Lemon, huh... more open, less guarded.
I now really wish to see how reze was before, not the gray her, but the colourful her.
He slipped his hands into his pockets. If I want her, he said calmly in his head, than I have to accept that she loved someone else first. I don't have to replace Lemon, he said quietly. I want to understand what happened first.
Yui says "I just don't want you breaking over someone who doesn't know how to stay yet," He gave a faint, thoughtful smile and thought. Than maybe she'll learn, and if she doesn't? Then I'll accept that too and stay with her myself.
She studied him for a long second. "You always decide things quietly, she said. And? just what are you thinking?" But she didn't knew once he had decided something he don't half-ass, stuff.
"Thanks, for the warning." He said.
"For what?" She blinked slightly. He looked toward the theatre building in the distance. If Lemon was part of her, then so be it. I wasn't interested in a version of Reze that erased her scars.
If he wanted her to be his — He would have to accept every chapter before him. Not to rewrite them. But so he could open the chapters where he never was there, so he could continue writing his story with her from there, a fresh new start.
And this time—
He meant it.
He knew he had to do impossible for her make her fall in love with him.
———
To be continue...
———