Naruto blinked as she left the gates of Suna after successfully delivering her client. The mission had been uneventful, aside from the usual quirks, but something odd lingered. Her chest tickled. It was an unfamiliar sensation, one that made her tilt her head in mild confusion.
"Naruto feels happy for some reason," she murmured to herself, her voice as flat as ever despite the peculiar warmth bubbling within her. Shrugging it off, she reached for the white kunai tucked into her dress, twirling it absentmindedly before activating the Flying Thunder God technique.
The world spun for an instant, and in the next, she was back in Konoha—though not quite where she'd intended.
Inside the Hokage office, Tsunade reclined in her chair, the last rays of the day streaming through the window. A satisfied sigh escaped her as she sipped on her sake, her feet propped up on the desk, eyes closed in bliss. Beside her was a precariously tall stack of sake bottles, the result of a day's worth of indulgence.
Then came the crash.
The tower of bottles toppled, shattering into an explosion of glass and the unmistakable pungent scent of spilled alcohol. Something—or someone—had landed right on top of it.
"Dattebayo?"
Tsunade's eyes snapped open, her blood pressure skyrocketing as she took in the chaotic scene. There, in the middle of the wreckage, stood Naruto Uzumaki. Her pristine white hair glistened under the flickering light, her frilly black dress now drenched in sake. She blinked innocently at Tsunade, completely unfazed by the mess around her.
"Naruto!" Tsunade roared, her voice echoing through the office as she slammed her fists on the desk, cracking it slightly. "What in the name of—why are you teleporting into my office?! Look at this mess!"
Naruto tilted her head, her expression unchanging. "Naruto wanted to report the mission. Dattebayo."
"Report the—!" Tsunade groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. She could feel the beginnings of a migraine creeping in. "You couldn't just use the door like a normal shinobi? You had to ruin my sake stash?" Tsunade's eyes twitched violently as the last precious bottle of her imported sake rolled across the floor, its contents gleaming mockingly under the office's dim lighting. Her desk was now a battlefield, drenched in alcohol, with several toppled bottles lying in defeat. And at the center of this destruction stood Naruto, her pristine frilly black dress now reeking of the prized beverage.
"Naruto!" Tsunade roared, slamming her palms on the desk. "Do you have any idea what you just did?! That sake cost more than your annual mission payouts!"
Naruto, soaked and slightly sticky, blinked innocently, tilting her head like a confused bird. "Naruto just thought she'd surprise Granny with her quick mission completion. Dattebayo."
Tsunade groaned, rubbing her temples as if to physically push away the impending migraine. "A surprise? A surprise? Dropping out of nowhere like a drunken angel on my sake stash is your idea of a surprise?!"
"Yes," Naruto said simply, nodding with the confidence of someone who had solved a profound mystery. "Naruto thought Granny would be happy."
"Happy?" Tsunade repeated, her voice dangerously low. Her fists trembled, the desk creaking under her grip as she fought the urge to throttle the girl right then and there. "You've ruined the only thing keeping me sane this week, and you think I should be happy?"
Naruto's brows furrowed ever so slightly, a rare expression of emotion crossing her usually stoic face. To Tsunade's astonishment, the girl actually pouted.
"Naruto thought granny would be happy with her completing the mission," she said, her voice softer, almost... hurt?
Tsunade froze mid-rant, momentarily caught off guard. Her frustration warred with guilt for a brief second before she shook her head furiously. "I am happy, but—ugh, never mind!" Reaching over the ruined bottles, she snatched the mission report from Naruto's outstretched hand. "Fine. Mission complete, got it. Now, for the love of everything holy, get out of my office!"
Naruto, now slightly pouting, crossed her arms in a stiff, robotic manner. "But Naruto finished the mission, dattebayo. On time. With no complaints from the client. Doesn't that deserve a little praise, Granny?"
For a moment, Tsunade could only stare at her. Then she let out a long, guttural sigh, the kind that came from a place of deep, existential exhaustion. "...Fiiine. You did a great job. Give me the report before I do something we'll both regret."
"Dattebayo!" Naruto said brightly, her hands clasped in front of her as though expecting a gold star. Naruto obediently handed over the mission scroll, still slightly sticky from the sake. Tsunade grimaced but took it anyway, skimming through the details with a practiced eye. Her mood soured further as the faint scent of sake wafted up from the paper.
"But," Tsunade added, her tone sharp enough to cut steel, "you're still banned from teleporting into this office unless it's a life-or-death emergency. Got it?"
Naruto blinked, her head tilting again. "Naruto understands."
"Good," Tsunade grumbled, tossing the scroll onto her ruined desk. "Now get out before I make you clean this mess."
Naruto gave her a polite bow—stiff, awkward, and somehow entirely too formal—before turning to leave. The alcohol squelched faintly beneath her boots as she walked away, leaving a sticky trail in her wake.
Tsunade groaned again, sinking into her chair and burying her face in her hands. "That girl is going to be the death of me..." she muttered, already reaching for the one untouched bottle of sake hidden in the corner of her desk drawer.