Sat, 16 March
12:21 AM
Dear Diary,
I read something today that hasn't left my mind.
"The worst kind of sad is not being able to explain why."
And I felt that.
Because if someone asked me what's wrong…
I wouldn't know where to start.
Nothing dramatic happened.
No big heartbreak.
No huge fight.
Just small things.
Small disappointments.
Small silences.
Small moments where I felt replaceable.
And they added up.
There's another line I saw once:
"You don't suddenly lose yourself. You lose yourself in pieces."
That's exactly how it feels.
Like I didn't change overnight.
I just adjusted.
Stayed quiet.
Lowered my expectations.
Stopped reacting.
And somewhere in between,
I became harder to reach.
Sometimes I think I'm okay.
But then nights like this happen.
And the truth gets louder.
"I'm not okay, but I don't want to be a burden."
That sentence lives in my head rent-free.
I don't want attention.
I don't want pity.
I just want someone to notice without me having to say it.
Is that selfish?
Or is that human?
I don't know.
All I know is…
I miss feeling understood without explaining myself.
And I miss the version of me
who didn't overthink every little change in someone's tone.
Maybe I'm not broken.
Maybe I'm just tired of being strong all the time.
And maybe…
just maybe…
that's okay.