It's been a couple of months since we were dragged here. "For safety measures," they said.
Ugh...
I never did anything wrong. I don't even have a criminal record.
I sat there on a bench, staring at the not so blue sky, my eyes felt so heavy, like im gonna pass out any second..
"Hey are you okay?"
A random stranger asked me with a worried expression
"Oh yeah.. uhm" i tried to look away embarrassed, "i.. just.. im tired.. really can't get over how they forced us all into this place."
The Stranger then sighed, as if he's already used to it.
"Me too kid, all we can do is survive yknow?"
I looked at him hopelessly, knowing this is my life now, Survive. This motivates me a little, even in a place like this? someone still dare to think it was a normal thing for them now.
"Yeah.. right.. right.."
As the stranger walks away into the crowd, i was left alone sitting in the rusty roadside bench,
"I should really go back to my apartment.."
My head hurts. I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to block out the unbearable truth of it all, but the reality was too loud.
ugh.. whatever.
My mom is probably waiting for me, i better hurry home now, I've been sitting for too long.
The walk home always sucks, the air in here always smells like dirty engines, and metallic rust, endless slums of gray buildings i eventually learned to hate
Even the crowd is so suffocating, hundreds of people in a single sidewalk. i can't breathe properly like this.
When i finally reached my apartment, the elevator was broken again
"God, what kinda electricans do they even hire?"
I groaned like this was already an everyday thing. i continued by walking up 5 floors on the damp, foul smelling, slippery stairs.
"Mom! im home, i got the groceries!"
I called out, as i pushed the door open
The apartment was silent. Too silent.
Usually mom would respond, TV would be humming, or I'd hear her shuffling in the kitchen. But the air in here felt heavy, still, and unnervingly cold. The groceries felt like lead in my arms as I stepped into the dim room. it was too cold.. the heater was off.
"Mom?"
Clink clink
I dropped the bag on a table near me, too exhausted to even think about the fridge.
I walked deeper into the dim room, my eyes starting to become heavier and heavier. I noticed the bathroom door was slightly open. A sliver of harsh, flickering fluorescent light spilled out, shining a white line across the dark floor.
I reached out, my finger's trembling from the cold. as i push open the white plastic door.
"Mom wh-"
My question was abruptly cut off by my own throat.
The first thing i saw was her shadow. stretched vertical shape across the floor, she didn't move.. Then, i saw her feet. wearing her favourite sandals dad gave her, before he passed away. dingaling six inches above the floor. swaying around slightly like wind is blowing.
Creak.. creak.. creak....
"Mom...?"
My mouth trembled, i sounded so pathetic, so weak.
She had used the scarf that i gave her last month, The one she said was pretty.. her head slumped, hair over her face. her face had turned a horrific shade of purple. her eyes staring into nothing.
i.. i can't even move.. i can't breath.. i was gonna tell her, im cooking tonight.. i..
I looked at the sink. there's a small piece of paper, no goodbye. no explanation. only 2 words "Im tired.". the feeling in my chest grows sharper.
" You're gonna.. miss dinner mom.."
I start to chuckle, before instantly turning into a deep sobbing. I wasn't a citizen, or a survivor anymore. I was just a kid in a gray room with a dead woman and a bag of food that didn't matter. The weight of the Red Zone finally settled on my shoulders, heavy and absolute, crushing the breath out of me until the only sound left was the ragged, rhythmic creaking of the pipe in the bathroom.
Creak.. creak.. creak...