The war was over. Peace had finally blanketed the land of Aleria like a warm, slightly itchy cloak.
The demon lord was long gone. The heroes? Either dead, retired, or dealing with adult stuff like taxes and public speeches.
So, naturally, the world moved on. People got boring. Villains became bankers. Dragons started therapy.
But not everyone wanted peace and quiet.
Some still believed the world needed heroes.
One of them was currently standing on a tavern table… waving a butter knife.
"I AM THE NEXT LEGENDARY HERO!" shouted Kirian Zennon, dramatically swooshing his "blade" through the air. "Born of noble blood! Trained in the arts of sword and sorcery! Savior of—ow!"
The butter knife slipped and hit him square in the forehead.
"Big brother," came a soft, slightly confused voice, "are you okay? Or is this part of your speech again?"
Liliana peered up from her seat, cheeks full of cake, and an umbrella resting across her lap like a sleepy kitten. She blinked slowly.
"You're bleeding."
Kirian grinned, flipping his dark hair out of his eyes with flair, and wiped away the small cut. "It's symbolic," he said proudly. "A hero must bleed for the people!"
"You bled for a sandwich earlier," Lili said, still chewing. "You tripped on a root."
"It was a cursed root!" he insisted.
"Mmhm."
Across the room, the tavern door slammed open, revealing a tall figure in a muddy cloak and boots that had clearly seen better centuries.
"Alright, lovebirds," Emilia Reis called out, grinning like a fox that just conned a chicken out of its feathers. "We've got a job."
Kirian jumped off the table—almost slipping again—and struck a pose beside her. "A quest for treasure? A mission to defeat darkness?"
"Sort of," Emilia said, flipping a map onto the table with a flourish. "We're hitting a mine."
"Oooh!" Lili's eyes lit up, mouth still full of cake. "Are there crystals?"
"Hopefully. And maybe some ancient artifacts we can accidentally sell."
Kirian leaned over the map. "This looks… suspiciously like a child's drawing."
"It isnt," Emilia said proudly. "Got it from a wise old man on the street."
"You mean you scammed him," Lili said through a mouthful of frosting.
"I convinced him to hand it over in exchange for a very valuable rock."
Kirian squinted. "You found that rock in the gutter."
"Exactly! A masterstroke of bargaining."
There was a long silence.
Lili poked her umbrella.
"Will there be cake?" she asked.
Later… Somewhere Near Trouble
The trio trudged along a dirt path toward the supposed mine, feet sinking slightly into the muddy earth. Birds chirped overhead. Something exploded in the distance. Emilia didn't even flinch.
"This mine better have actual treasure," Kirian huffed. "Not another bucket full of old spoons."
"I told you the spoons were cursed," Emilia shot back.
"No, you said we could sell them as cursed spoons."
"And we did! For three whole coins!"
"We spent it on jelly beans."
Lili hummed dreamily, staring at a shiny rock on the ground. "This one looks like a cat… if the cat was crushed under a cart."
Emilia stopped walking. "Right. This is the spot."
Kirian stared at the hill before them. "That's not a mine. That's a large dirt lump with a hole."
"Details," Emilia said, brushing past him. "Greatness doesn't care about appearances."
"You said that about the barrel we slept in last week," Kirian muttered.
Lili leaned into him, whispering softly, "At least this time there aren't raccoons. I think."
—-
One Loud Crack and a Loud Fall Later…
THUD. CRASH. THUMP.
"OW! My noble butt!" Kirian yelped from the bottom of the pit.
"I told you not to lean on the entrance!" Emilia's voice echoed down after him.
"You literally said 'lean harder,'" he groaned.
Lili slid down behind him, landing with an ooof. "This mine smells like bad bread."
Kirian winced, rubbing his back. "This is no way for a hero to begin his legend…"
Emilia dropped down after them with a loud thud, landing in a crouch like she practiced it in a mirror. She dusted off her cloak.
"And yet," she said with a grin, "here we are. In a forgotten mine. With zero adult supervision. And absolutely no clue what we're doing."
She raised her arms dramatically.
"This… is how legends begin."
Lili raised her hand. "I think I stepped on something soft. It made a squish."
They all looked down.
It squished again.