Translator - Zofu
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"These days, our puppy doesn't listen to commands well, so the owner is a bit troubled."
Here we go again.
Han Ye-rin. This bitch always does this whenever I do something that rubs her the wrong way or makes even the slightest mistake.
"Who trained you so poorly that you look away when your owner is speaking?"
Ah, fuck.
I'd forgotten that my head had dropped while I was lost in thought.
"This won't do. Kneel down and stay like a dog."
I swallow the curse trying to escape my lips. Smiling, I kneel down and place my hands on the floor.
Like a four-legged beast. Shame floods through me, flushing my face red. Then, she rises from her chair and comes toward me.
"Stay still."
Human chair.
Her favorite punishment. At least she's light, so it's not a physical strain, but still, it feels fucking terrible. Does she do this often because she knows that?
"You'll stay like this until class starts. No complaints, right? After all, our puppy is the one at fault."
"Yes..."
"Good. Don't speak anymore."
I close my mouth. And stay still. It's a sign of acknowledgment.
Before long, people start gathering around.
"Whoa, she's doing it again?"
"Our puppy's having a hard time, huh? Aren't you hungry?"
"Want some bread? Or... since you eat it all the time, maybe you're sick of it?"
I let it flow in one ear and out the other. Right now, this is the best I can do.
Did you know?
That even in this dreamlike academy, there are students who drop out.
That people leave this place, which gives those without pedigree a start at honor, and those with pedigree a legacy of honor.
Most of them are people in situations like mine.
And most of these people are the 'have-nots.'
Ignored wherever they go, unable to fit in anywhere, always forced to be alone.
But still, I have to endure. Because I have her. Because at least outside the academy, she's waiting for me.
If it weren't for her, I would have left this place before I could even adapt. That's how important she is to me.
All I need to do is maintain my position as top student and graduate from the academy safely. That's it.
"Almost time."
As Han Ye-rin closes her mouth, the bell rings.
The moment it rings, she gets off my back.
"Good work. Don't let it happen again."
I nod my head.
She smiles at me.
Fucking bitch.
"Understood."
I brush off my knees and quickly sit back down at my desk.
And she... sits next to me.
"Let's study hard for the rest of the time."
"Of course."
She's the second rank.
* * *
Time passes quickly, and before I know it, it's the end-of-day bell, and the sky is dyed with sunset.
When it's time to go home, a familiar face approaches me.
"Are you okay?"
"Yes, I'm fine."
"If it gets too hard, tell me. I'll tell her to take it easy."
"That's not necessary."
Kim Seok-hyun.
The man who is Han Ye-rin's boyfriend.
One of the few people I trust and my only friend in the class.
Whether out of sympathy or pity, he finds me two or three times a week on my way home and keeps me company.
Probably, it's largely thanks to him that she doesn't bother me after school.
"Lately, I feel like my girlfriend's been doing this more often. Is it because the midterms are coming up?"
"Whatever, she's always like that."
"Can't argue with that."
A faint smile plays on his lips. The boyfriend is so level-headed, so why does the girlfriend act like she's missing a few screws?
"No matter what you do, you can't take the top spot."
"Can't argue with that either."
Is it because I'm just too fucking good? Probably. The owner can't out-study the puppy. It's a shame I can't say this to her face. If I did, I'd probably end up tied to a barrel and drowned at the bottom of the sea, with no rats or birds the wiser.
As we exchange words, Kim Seok-hyun's phone vibrates.
"Ah, my girlfriend's calling. Nice talking to you."
"Take care."
"I'll get going now. Have a good weekend."
"Yes."
Now it's time for me to go home too.
The time I've been waiting for, the time I've always waited for.
It's time to meet Yoo Seo-ha.
On the way back, she greets me.
But for some reason, her expression is a bit dark.
What could be wrong?
We ride the bus home together, but she doesn't say a single word to me.
A foreboding feeling slowly creeps up my spine.
Why... why is she acting like this? Did I do something wrong? What? What?
The bus stops. We arrive at our destination. My heart, which had been pounding with anxiety, starts beating like crazy, as if I've downed dozens of cups of coffee.
The two of us get off at the stop in front of our house and walk in silence.
Even after enduring all the humiliation from Han Ye-rin, this silence is hard to bear.
Is she... is she trying to break up with me?
A terrible thought sinks in. No, absolutely not. I need to pull it out. I need to pull out this thought. That can't be. That absolutely can't be.
Come to think of it, yesterday she had a similar expression too.
What did I do wrong? It's definitely something I did wrong. Otherwise, this silence doesn't make sense. I rack my brain, searching for my mistake.
When we ate together yesterday, did I eat too much meat? Fuck, I'm not a son of a bitch, I'm a son of a pig.
When we were lying in bed sleeping the day before, did I take too much of the blanket? I'm a selfish son of a bitch.
The day before that, when we went to pick out clothes, did I recommend something weird? I'm a fashion-ignorant cripple.
What... what did I do wrong?
As I'm lost in confusion, unable to say anything, she turns to face me.
The rims of her eyes are red.
My face turns pale beyond words. Because I don't know what I did, the feeling weighs twice as heavy.
First, let's kneel.
I'm good at kneeling.
"I was wrong-"
"I'm sorry..."
I stop mid-kneel. I barely catch myself from falling and look at Seo-ha with a flustered face.
"What?"
Why is she apologizing when I did nothing wrong? Today is a series of surprises. Why? Why?
As I rise from my spot, she looks at me with teary eyes.
"I... decided to go study abroad in America."
What?
I can't breathe. It's not like I'm underwater.
What did I just hear?
She's going to America? Leaving me behind?
"I... I tried to persuade them. You know how stubborn my dad is..."
I know. She comes from a well-off family. Of course, a daughter of a mid-sized company owner wouldn't want her hanging out with some baker's kid.
But still. Still...
My mother, who had been persuading her father knowing how much we loved each other, finally surrendered to his iron will. I can understand that.
Her father would prefer her to meet some rich guy in America and fall in love. I can understand that too. I'm lacking. I tried, but I'm lacking in everything else.
But... still...
My heart doesn't understand. Tears cloud my vision at the surging emotions.
Goddammit. Why is this happening to me?
My vision is so blurry. It's like I'm underwater. I can't see her clearly. And this might be the last time.
I sob, making sounds. She says she's sorry, so sorry, and embraces me with both arms. I want to feel her more. I want to feel her more.
"Tae-ho, you... you liked that we were pure before marriage, right..."
Then, my mind snaps clear. I stop crying and look at her with wide eyes.
"Right?"
Huh?
"I... I leave Korea tomorrow..."
Huh?
"That, um, that"
"I'm sorry... for not telling you sooner..."
"No."
"Today, my parents won't be home..."
"Ah."
My sanity cut off right there.
* * *
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