Chapter 65: Catch the Hemorrhoids [3] "Ugh..."
These days, Kanghyeok was staying at Ryu Seong-ryong's house.
Not only in Geoncheon-dong, but even after looking all around the nearby area, it would have been hard to find a better house than this.
It was to the point that it did not even deserve comparison with the house the Busa had readily lent him.
His back was warm, and his belly was full every day.
"Ugh..."
But his heart was anything but comfortable.
The reason was the groans that kept coming one after another.
"Urgh."
There was no need to search for where they were coming from.
"Daegam, are you all right?"
"I'm dying, absolutely dying. This really is getting better, isn't it?"
After the surgery, bowel movements had become an outright war.
That was only natural, since he had cut into the very place where the hemorrhoidal masses had already been protruding.
Seong-ryong complained of excruciating pain every single day.
The first time he passed bloody stool, Kanghyeok did not even want to think about it again.
—This wretch dares humiliate a chief state councillor!
If Sun-sin had not stopped them, he might really have been torn apart and killed on the spot.
Even now, the looks in some of the servants' eyes when they looked at Kanghyeok were still extremely fierce.
"Yes, it is improving. It's already far better than it was on the first day, isn't it?"
"That may be so, but..."
The fortunate thing was that his recovery was progressing rather quickly.
Every morning, whenever he looked at Seong-ryong's anus, a feeling of satisfaction welled up in him.
Even if a colorectal specialist had crossed over here, he probably would not have managed it this well.
"Now then, a sitz bath..."
"Ugh."
Seong-ryong obediently followed Kanghyeok's instructions.
If nothing else, the sitz bath alone had quite a significant effect.
Moreover, Kanghyeok's treatment had something about it that went beyond ordinary physicians.
"Does it feel good?"
"It does. Hah. There's much less blood too."
Seong-ryong muttered as he looked at the blood diffusing into the basin.
At first, it had turned bright red the moment it touched the water, but now it only spread gradually after quite some time had passed.
"All right, now please lie down."
"Ah, mm. Fine."
At first, it had truly been nothing but humiliating.
To think that a scholar-official had to entrust his buttocks to another man's hands every single day.
But Kanghyeok's touch was so careful and attentive that by now he had become fairly used to it.
"This looks very good."
"Does it? Thank you."
"I'll apply some ointment now."
"All right."
At Kanghyeok's gesture, Dolseok, who had been standing some distance away, came running over.
In his hand was a small porcelain jar.
In the meantime, Kanghyeok put on gloves.
No matter who he was, he had no intention of touching another man's buttocks with his bare hands.
"Here it is."
"Good. There's enough of this, right?"
"Of course. We've already made more than ten jars of it."
"Well done."
The ways to make use of Dorikkae and the rest of the bandit gang were truly endless.
Even now, at the house the Busa had lent him, they were busily decocting medicinal herbs.
Most of them were the sort that could be stored and used for a long time, like the one Kanghyeok was holding now.
Was it called Jawoongo?
It was made by boiling down purple gromwell root, angelica root, and the like. The process was demanding, but the effect was fairly good.
Its moisturizing effect was especially impressive.
Kanghyeok even used it himself in place of lotion.
It would've been best if I had steroid ointment.
But where in the world was he supposed to get something like that?
As the saying went, when there were no teeth, the gums had to do. He was grateful to have even this kind of ointment.
"It'll feel a little cold."
"Mm."
"The colder it is, the better, so please bear with it just a little."
"I will."
Kanghyeok carefully applied the Jawoongo around Seong-ryong's anus.
The sutured area had already more or less joined, so the risk of infection was low.
Even so, that did not mean medicine could be skipped.
Whew. That stinks.
No matter how much of a sitz bath he had taken, he had just produced something, after all.
If it smelled pleasant, that would have been the strange part.
It was not as though they had soap.
Kanghyeok quickly stripped off his gloves and threw them aside.
The cleanup was always Dolseok's responsibility.
"Ah, you took them off and tossed them aside again."
"Come on. Just throw them away properly."
"Yes, yes. Burn them, right?"
"Mm."
If left alone, they probably would disappear anyway.
Objects not attached to the human body always seemed to do that.
Still, where would I even keep something like that?
Even if it had touched the anus of a famous chief state councillor.
What use would there be in keeping it?
"Burn them. And empty that basin too."
"Yes, yes. Still, the redness has gone down a lot now."
While the two whispered to each other, Seong-ryong pulled his trousers back up.
Since Kanghyeok had specially modified them, the buttocks area was left completely exposed.
"You should take your medicine now."
"Ah, right. The medicine you give me is a bit bland, but it works very well."
"That's good to hear."
Kanghyeok handed him the antibiotics, anti-inflammatory painkillers, and antacids that had already been portioned out.
With practiced ease, Seong-ryong tossed the medicine into his mouth, then asked Kanghyeok,
"When do you think I'll be completely better?"
"It will still take at least another ten days."
"Hah. That's serious. It's already been quite a while since I've gone to the palace."
"Won't they understand? I heard that before, when you collapsed, you were laid up for more than a month."
To be bedridden for a month because of hemorrhoids.
To Kanghyeok, that was almost unbelievable.
Then again, it's not entirely impossible.
He thought it was probably because the prolapsed tissue had not gone back in properly.
And there was no chance he had received appropriate treatment.
"At that time, I truly thought I was going to die."
He had even gone so far as to write a letter resigning from office.
If Ryu Seong-ryong had actually resigned then, Sun-sin probably would not have had such a chance to distinguish himself either.
It would not have been an exaggeration to say that Joseon's fate had swayed back and forth over a single case of hemorrhoids.
"That won't happen now."
"I hope so."
"Ah, breakfast is coming."
With a face that did not look very pleased, Seong-ryong pointed at the maidservant.
Once he ate, sooner or later he would have to defecate again.
It truly felt like eating pain itself.
To make matters worse, the side dishes set before him were pitiful beyond words.
"So it's nothing but greens again."
At Seong-ryong's complaint, the maidservant lowered her head.
She did not forget to offer an excuse either.
"Scholar Baek instructed that it should be so."
"Yes, yes. If it's good for the body, what can I do? You may withdraw."
Even while staring at the meal table, Seong-ryong could not raise his spoon for quite some time.
"Well now. Never in my life did I think I was a man who craved meat. But after only a few days without it, is it really this hard?"
"You still have to endure it. If you eat meat, it will hurt much more when you move your bowels."
"If you say so, then that must be the case."
In truth, it would not have been an exaggeration to say that hemorrhoids were caused by constipation.
For hemorrhoids in Joseon, anal hygiene was also a very major factor.
But that did not make dietary habits any less important.
Dietary fiber was something one could only benefit from eating more of.
Of course, even doctors did not always follow every principle themselves.
"My appetite is excellent."
"It would be, for you."
Seong-ryong's face was full of dissatisfaction.
That was because Kanghyeok's meal table was very different from his.
It was laden with finely shredded roasted chicken, salted oysters sent as tribute from Jeolla-do, and dried octopus a friend had sent a few days earlier.
"Haha. I feel rather guilty for no reason."
"You say eating like me is best, yet why do you eat like that yourself?"
"I've practically spent my whole life taking sitz baths, so it doesn't matter for me. Daegam, you'll be able to eat like I do soon enough."
"I hope so."
Seong-ryong's wish did not go unanswered.
On the exact tenth day Kanghyeok had promised, he was finally able to beam.
"Haha."
He had actually reached the point where he did not even lose his smile while moving his bowels.
Of course, it was not because he had gone mad.
The pain that had tormented him for decades had vanished as though washed away.
"Hahaha."
Had not that Anseong blood-stool passer also become an entirely different person once his hemorrhoids were cured?
Since Seong-ryong had already been admirable even while ill, after recovering he was practically a sage.
"Hahahaha."
Once he finished with the sitz bath as well, he felt even better.
Anyone who had tried it would know. Soaking that place in warm water gave an indescribable feeling.
"My good fellow, Kanghyeok."
"Yes, daegam."
"I don't know if this is the right way to put it."
Seong-ryong went on while gazing at the bright full moon.
Deep regret and reflection could be seen in his eyes.
He wore the expression of a man tracing back through the years gone by.
"It feels as if I've been born again."
"Haha. The honor is mine."
"No, truly, thank you. I never thought a day like this would come."
"Even so, you still need to watch what you eat and keep up the sitz baths."
"I know, I know. From now on, I'll listen to everything you say. But tomorrow, surely it'll be all right if I drink a little?"
Tomorrow was the day Sun-sin was finally leaving for Hamgyeong-do.
No matter how much of a doctor Kanghyeok was, he had no intention of acting stingy on a day like that.
What's a little extra sitz bathing?
How could he possibly stand in the way when two great men wanted to share their feelings over a drink?
Kanghyeok nodded readily.
"Of course."
"That's the best thing I've heard all day."
"But you must eat more vegetables instead."
"All right, all right."
The fact that Seong-ryong had fully recovered quickly spread among the servants as well.
Hemorrhoids.
Was that not the disease that had tormented the master they revered as though he were the heavens?
Everyone remembered how every remedy had failed, and how countless physicians had left in defeat after tasting bitterness.
"He really is something."
"I looked down on him a bit since he came from Suwon, but I guess I was wrong."
"Just look at daegam's expression these days. It makes me feel alive myself."
"That's exactly what I mean."
And such talk was not confined only to the servants.
As befitted Seong-ryong's power, an enormous number of people went in and out of his house.
Naturally, fellow Easterners such as Kim Seong-il, Kim Yungil, and Yi San-hae came by constantly.
Not only them, but he also frequently associated with men whose political views did not align with his, such as Jeong Cheol, the leader of the Westerners.
Relatively younger figures such as Yi Hang-bok and Yi Deok-hyeong also visited quite often.
And would such people come alone?
Naturally, they would bring attendants with them.
"I'm telling you. You know how our daegam used to suffer, right?"
"Of course, of course."
"Well, it's all been cured completely."
"Really? Hah, can something like that actually happen?"
Back then, people did not have many things to be astonished by.
When they gathered, gossiping was about all there was to do.
And once people chatted with all their heart, the story naturally began traveling upward.
Most simply found it curious.
"Really? Daegam's illness was cured completely? That's an interesting story."
Like that.
Of course, there were also people who took an interest.
"I ought to visit him one of these days."
"Did you say his name is Baek Kanghyeok?"
Mostly, they were people who had some ache or ailment of their own.
Among them, the person who showed the greatest interest was a rather unexpected figure.
"So there really is such a miraculous physician?"
It was none other than Yi Hang-bok, who had passed through such important posts as Jeojak, Baksa, Jeongeon, and Suchan, and was now serving as Yejo Jeongnang of Senior Fifth Rank.
He had long ago married General Kwon Yul's daughter, and their relationship was fairly harmonious.
But that did not mean he had no dissatisfaction at all.
Because his wife was the very image of General Kwon Yul, her face was not particularly pretty.
And was he not himself one of the Three Great Handsome Men of Hanyang, together with Yi Deok-hyeong and Ryu Seong-ryong?
How could he possibly be entirely satisfied with a plain-looking wife?
"Do you think he might even be able to fix a face?"
He voiced a very unconventional question for the time, aided in no small part by his naturally playful temperament.
"Pardon?"
At his steward's dumbfounded question, Hang-bok asked in return,
"Now that he has fully recovered, I should pay him a visit, should I not?"
"Ah... yes. As it happens, I hear that tomorrow he is having a drinking gathering with a man named Yi Sun-sin."
"Really? Excellent. I happen to have some fine liquor, so let's go there tomorrow."
"Ah, yes. I'll inform them."
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