I have been dying for a long time now....
Not the kind that happens all at once, but instead it is the one that goes slowly and quietly which eats you away alive from the inside and teaches you to smile through hell.
I am diagnosed by a deadly genetic disease. My father left me and my mother to rot to death. He wants us dead, if that's the last thing he wants.
My mother somehow kept me alive and fed me every twice a week, but it was only harder for her.
One day she just collapsed on the floor and blood started oozing from a unusual looking part of her arm.
I was taken aback seeing this. Intrigued, even.
But, you see, I am a no normal human being. People tend to cry and scream if something happens to their loved ones, but I didn't do any of that.
I bid her farewell as light diminished from her scarlet eyes and felt her whole body turning ice cold.
It must have been hard for her...
I still remember her gentle fragile fingers cupping my face and telling me to live a long and happy life...
Lies just don't end, huh?
But the stupidest thing is that even this wasn't the worst kind of pain.
It was pretending.
Pretending that I was fine.
Pretending I was happy and content with my current life.
Pretending that the people I always force myself to laugh around actually knew me.
It hurts....
EVERYTHING...
I knew I wasn't normal, and that's why only a fake knows it's a fake among reals..
And maybe that's why I noticed "her"
In a world where everything was dull and rehearsed, she felt....wrong. There was something about her that attracted me towards her.
Something faint. Even ethereal and out of this despicable world. Like a limpid light trying to hide itself. And for some reason, It felt familiar.
The first time I saw the girl was near a hospital. I could read her like an open book.
Trouble, brutality and Fear was already something I knew from birth, and she seemed to have been going through it too. Not that I was being sympathetic towards her and not that I was going to tell her lies like " everything would be fine. That everything can go back to normal", just to give the girl some closure. Not that I was in any place to lecture her...
But still I approached her..
It felt as an instinct...As if she were a part of me.
I walked towards her, taking quiet steps, so I don't frighten her. Also because I wasn't in the mood of being called creepy.
I remember seeing her long, brown hair reaching down to the length of her back, her honey-like skin glistening in the Sun, her lashes looking dark and fuller and her eyes the colour of Sun lowering itself at dusk . She had a precise figure and her gentle-looking face seemed to compete to that of a fallen angel.
I pitied myself for having such thoughts. I felt that there was some hope and beauty still hovering in this world.
The hospital...
There was something different about the hospital too. It always looked so sterile and cold. Much like a graveyard..
I was all too familiar about it.
It was like nothing was meant to survive there for long..
But it didn't feel that way when she was there.
I wonder why I felt like that,
again..