I got to school in no time and headed straight for his class without giving myself even a second to think.
At some point along the way, I had already realized something about myself, that whenever panic took hold of me, I stopped thinking properly and started acting on impulse.
I knew that was exactly what I was doing now, reckless and unplanned, but that awareness did nothing to slow me down. If anything, it made me push harder, like I was racing against something I could not see.
Because what exactly was I going to do when I got there?
The question hit me, but my body kept moving anyway. If I walked into his class and saw him sitting there, what then? Was I going to ask him to step outside so we could talk?
And what if he refused? What if he looked at me and decided he wanted nothing to do with me anymore? Was I going to walk right up to his seat and force the explanation out of my chest, whether he wanted to hear it or not?
I didn't know.
