Chapter 22: Preparation "There's still some time before the practical, but I want you to get to know your teammates and start your preliminary preparations. Group members, gather and begin your meeting."
At Derek's calm command, the students who had drawn numbers began to congregate.
Since I was already standing near the Comedy Duo, I didn't have to move; the two of them shuffled over to me.
Chika, who had been staring blankly into space for a long while, gritted her teeth and approached once she noticed Derek watching her.
"Well then, shall we start the meeting?"
Wow—look at this atmosphere.
I tried to take the lead with a bright smile, but the Comedy Duo remained silent, and Chika just glared at me with her head tilted at a crooked angle.
Ah~ I'm so happy~ A whole week of a 'happy-happy' Deserted Island Exam life with these members.
If it were any other girl, the Comedy Duo might have opened up after adjusting a bit, but with a mad dog who's intimidating as hell and bites anything she doesn't like standing right there, they just turned into background characters.
Chika stared blankly at Akito, who was busy welcoming his new harem, and then muttered as if she had given up on life.
"Sigh… what kind of sin did I commit in my past life?"
"Probably a big one? Like, selling out an entire country at the very least?"
"Dammit… I want to die."
"Then could you hurry up and kick the bucket? We need to swap members."
"… …"
When I continued to 'kindly' respond to her monologues, Chika glared at me as if she wanted to murder me.
What, you brat? You think I'm going to coddle you when you're ruining the mood the moment we meet?
However, feeling Derek's gaze on us, I maintained my bright expression and spoke.
"We might not like each other, but let's do our best for the next week~"
"Dumbass."
I swear, if it weren't for this exam, I would've given you a flick to the forehead.
I need to get a good grade to unlock part-time jobs and take on higher-tier requests, so I have to put my life on the line here.
I'm not like you guys who attend as a hobby and got in through your parents' money.
I already knew the details from playing the game, but I read through the materials Derek handed out to make sure my teammates understood the rules.
Even though it was called survival on a deserted island, it didn't actually have much to do with survival in the way people usually think.
Actually, wait. With this team, it might.
The exam evaluated things that were hard to quantify, like mental fortitude, logic, and cooperation. Various minigames and missions would be given periodically, and as long as you maintained a certain rank, supplies like food and tents would be provided.
And if you failed? Then you'd have to spend your time running around the island catching snakes to skin them and searching for clean water.
For the record, in the game's story, Group 4—the one I was in—failed spectacularly and spent the whole time begging other groups for help.
In the midst of that, Akito only looked after Chika, leaving the Comedy Duo (who were a trio in the game) to be nothing but pitiful.
Should I start learning survival skills now?
Cooperation is key, but I can already see the future: Chika doing whatever she wants while the Comedy Duo follows her around in a state of pure terror.
I'll just take comfort in the fact that, like the entrance ceremony test, this is taking place in a virtual space.
The meeting ended without any real progress.
*
"Leave the survival to me."
"Could you maybe say stuff like that during the meeting?"
"But… she's so scary…"
Masayoshi trailed off, glancing at Chika, who was currently clinging to Akito's arm and squealing.
I really don't see a solution to this.
Well, we were divided into groups, but it's an individual evaluation anyway, so maybe it doesn't matter.
I half-gave up as well and headed straight to a massage shop for an interview as soon as classes were over.
"Hired."
"…I haven't even said anything yet?"
The boss, who looked like a toad but was actually a kind man rather than a pervert, hired me the moment he saw me.
"Yeon-woo. What do you think is the essence of a massage?"
"Um—feeling refreshed?"
"No, it's satisfaction."
Isn't that the same thing?
"The moment a customer lies down on the bed, they want healing. They pay money for a satisfying time."
"So I just need to be good at massaging, right?"
"Exactly. In that sense, Yeon-woo, you are already nearly complete."
"…I don't know the first thing about massages, though?"
The toad… I mean, the Boss, crossed his arms, tapped his finger, and then pointed at me.
"You're handsome."
Oh—is this guy crazy? Wasn't he supposed to be a legendary massager?
Seeing the distrust in my eyes, the Toad quickly continued.
"I used to be called the God Hand."
"Wow. How. Im.pressive."
"But I've never been able to satisfy a female customer. Do you know why?"
"Because you're ugly?"
"…That's true, but hearing it said so bluntly hurts. Anyway, yes. I haven't massaged a female customer since my 20s. Actually, I barely did it even then. I only ever touched women when I was teaching my disciples or staff."
I leaned back and looked around the shop.
Is this called Baroque style? I wasn't sure, but the interior—decorated with high-end wood accents and a pastel mint color scheme—was clearly targeted toward women.
It wasn't strictly women-only, but since they also did skin care, there were bound to be more female customers than male.
"It seems like you'd have a lot of female customers."
"I do. But I only handle the male customers."
"Aren't you the best at massaging, Boss?"
"But they scream in horror when I walk in…"
I patted the dejected Boss on the shoulder.
"To get back to the point, the other staff have learned my techniques to some extent. However, it's difficult for a woman to master them perfectly. It requires a lot of grip strength."
"So you're going to teach me."
"No, you don't really need to learn. You'll pick up the basics from the other staff."
Then what the hell do you want from me, man?
Just as I was wondering if I'd come to the wrong place, the Boss continued.
"I told you, it's about satisfaction. With that face, even if you just give a mediocre massage, the female customers will be immensely satisfied."
"Is this a shady establishment?"
"No! It's a wholesome place! But I want you to know that your appearance is just that valuable."
He was strangely persuasive, yet he sounded like a swindler.
When I saw him in the game, he looked like a pervert but was actually a kind man with a strong sense of craftsmanship. Why did he change now that I'm here?
"The customers who come for massages are all people exhausted by daily life. It is our mission as massagers to heal their weary hearts and bodies. I want everyone who comes to our shop to leave with a level of satisfaction they can't find anywhere else. You can do it."
Craftsmanship… I guess it is a form of craftsmanship? Maybe.
Anyway, that's how I ended up working at the massage shop.
However, since the exam was right around the corner, I decided to start working officially after it was over.
For now, I had to prepare for the test.
*
"Master, please teach me some magic that would be helpful."
"Do you think I'm a vending machine?"
"But I'm seriously at a loss. My teammates are all trash-tier."
"Have you considered that you might be trash-tier too?"
"No way. I'm handsome. Isn't my face enough?"
"Right, if everyone is trash-tier, at least it's fair."
Frey nodded, seemingly convinced by her own logic, then thought for a moment before asking.
"Since it's the first-year midterm, is it the deserted island?"
"Oh? You know about it. You're not from Yggdrasil."
"I have a friend who is."
"Oh, you have a friend. Is she pretty?"
I shouldn't have asked. I ended up doing another set of training before collapsing on the floor.
Frey tossed a towel onto my face and sat down next to my sprawled-out body.
"If everyone is trash-tier, I have a spell that can make you sleep like the dead for a week."
"No. Please don't tell me to give up."
Why is she giving me a way to give up comfortably right from the start?
It was strangely tempting, but it was the devil's whisper. I absolutely had to rank in the top tier.
To be honest, I'd searched the internet to see if I could find anything helpful, but it was as if Yggdrasil controlled the media—not a single detail about the exam was online.
Since there were many missions done individually or in pairs, there were likely many different types.
I only knew the missions Akito participated in. I had no idea about the rest.
And what I'd experienced was a game; I hadn't actually lived on a deserted island for a week.
I pulled the towel down halfway to give her a desperate look. Frey frowned and shrugged.
"You have to look at the long term and think about how to utilize limited resources. Think of it as a marathon, not a sprint."
"So, what's a good spell for a marathon?"
"I'm telling you! Haven't I always told you to be more serious?"
"… …"
I made a zipping motion over my mouth above the towel covering my lower face. Frey glared at me before continuing.
"Since we don't have much time, you won't be able to learn anything complex."
"You underestimate your disciple's tal—never mind. Please continue."
"One is a spell called Turtle Breathing Technique."
Now that the game had become reality, there were so many fascinating spells I'd never heard of.
The Turtle Breathing Technique was apparently used often by spies and assassins.
Interestingly, it wasn't a spell used for infiltration, but for waiting after infiltrating.
It erases your presence and drops your metabolism and body temperature, making it perfect for staying hidden for days.
"Your physical abilities drop, but if you don't have to move, you barely need water or food, which is great for survival situations. You preserve your strength like that and then release it when necessary."
"Camping, huh? It's a spell for the ultimate pathetic losers."
"…So you're not going to learn it?"
"I have to learn it."
The next spell I learned after the Turtle Breathing Technique was the Eye of Yullat.
I especially liked it because you had to flick your thumb like you were flipping a coin to cast it—it looked incredibly cool.
When you flick your thumb, a small mass of mana shoots into the sky. It shares its vision with you, allowing you to look down from above.
I could already see the picture.
The moment I arrive on the deserted island, I flick my thumb! I scout the terrain and then coolly say, 'Found it. Follow me.' Man, that would be sick.
Teaching me a cool spell right after a pathetic loser spell—Frey really knows how to sell it.
"What did I say is the first thing you do when you step onto a battlefield?"
"Assess the surroundings."
"Right. Environment, terrain, buildings, hazards—input everything that could affect the battle into your head."
The members of Greyhound looked like mountain bandits, so I expected their combat style to be rough, but they actually fought like special forces.
Since they were all trained by Frey, her influence must have been deep.
Frey got excited while explaining the Eye of Yullat and poured out a massive amount of knowledge—how to use terrain strategically, rules of engagement for hills, the sea, and forests, and how to utilize the environment.
I'm full, Grandma. I can't eat anymore.
After cramming more knowledge into my head than I could possibly remember, Frey looked satisfied and took a sip of her coffee.
"You said you made a weapon, right? Pull it out."
Mages here basically carried small sticks that stored the weapons they used for combat.
Or was it a transformation? I'd learned too much in a short time, so I was confused.
Anyway, they usually carried them in the form of a small, light stick that was easy to use for magic, and then transformed them into weapons when a battle broke out.
Akito used a flashy sword that looked like a holy blade, Chika used gauntlets the size of her thighs, the Samurai obviously used a katana, and Shiori used a long staff.
"I spent a lot of money on this. It's custom-made. Custom-made."
"I heard you the first time. Stop bragging and pull it out."
She really doesn't understand the excitement of getting a new product.
In response to Frey's cold reaction, I pulled out the stick and transformed it into a weapon.
It wasn't a character that appeared in the game, but I'd placed a special order with a craftsman who was quite famous in this world.
"… … You're not joking, are you?"
"It was expensive."
"What kind of mage uses a baseball bat as a weapon?"
"It's not a baseball bat. It's a club that infuses etiquette."
Frey sighed and pressed her hand to her forehead.
But the bat looked cool.
And the design was really sleek.
It had a shiny black body like a brand-new aluminum bat, and a giant nut was fitted onto the top, making it perfect for smashing heads.
Resting it on my shoulder with a smirk would look badass.
"For the record, its name is the Etiquette Infuser."
"I didn't ask. You're really desperate to stand out, aren't you?"
"With this face, it's impossible for me to be ordinary."
"Fine. I'll infuse some etiquette into you so you can swing that thing properly."
I don't know what she didn't like, but Frey gritted her teeth and worked me harder than usual.
Well, higher training intensity is a good thing… right?
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