Chapter 4
Flashback
"Give it back!" I yelled at him, tears welled up in my eyes, threatening to fall at any second.
"Are you going to cry?" he taunted, dangling my hello kitty bag over my head.
I wondered what he saw in me that made me such an easy target and why I was like that.
Every single day he found a way to taunt me, every single day since the first day of high school and always made me feel shit, and today was no different.
My counsellor always tells me
that bullies always have a reason for picking on people, that they have something they are insecure about, that they hate about themselves but looking at him from down here it didn't seem like that was the case.
I mean what could be possibly be insecure about.
It kind of looked like I was the one with the insecurities and he was trying to make me stand up for myself.
Maybe if I screamed a little louder, he would stop and give me my bag back.
"Give it back, Matthew!" I tried, but it came out more as a whimper of a scared and helpless little girl sick and tired of people picking on her.
"Okay, I'll give it back," he said, his hand outstretched toward me.
"Sike!" he said pouring the contents of my bag on the ground stepping on them my books, pens, glass case as he walked away, leaving me there.
"See you tomorrow."
Present
My eyes widened in shock as she uttered that name. The last time I spoke of him was in my diaries I had in high school, and I locked it up with the rest of the junk from that period of my life in a suitcase at the top of my wardrobe.
"Why would you do that?" I asked my knuckles turning white from how hard I was gripping the table.
"Well, since you asked nicely," she said batting her eyelashes innocently.
"He's rich, and his mum asked me if I knew anyone that would want to go on a date with him." she said, grinning, so proud of herself.
"And I immediately thought about my recently divorced daughter, that was still hiding away at my house, eating my food, sleeping under my roof"
She gestured to the house, exaggerating more than needed, as if I was costing her a million for every day that I stayed here.
"One would think you would atleast be grateful." she said.
"So let me get this straight," I turned to give her my full attention my anger bubbling now.
"You signed your daughter up to audition for the role of his girlfriend?" I said looking at her in disbelief.
"If you are saying I set you up on a date with a with a rich man, then– yes," she said.
It all made sense now, she never actually cared about me she only cared about what I could get her. The perfect opportunity presented itself and she thought of getting rid of me, not only that but to a man that bullied me in school.
"I'm not going." I said firmly not giving into her manipulation any longer.
"Of course you are," she insisted like she could somehow convince me to do it.
"I just got out of a divorce, for God's sake, Mother." I said trying as much as possible to maintain a normal tone and not to raise my voice at her.
The table rattled, the flower vase almost toppling over the table, making me jump in my seat "You're going on that date!" she slammed her hands on the table.
"I'll think about it." I said as I cleared my plates.
"It's been three months, Andrea," she said loudly. "You can't keep living here," she added as she wiped her hands against her napkin, dabbing the crumbs from her mouth.
"I've been here for three fucking months, Mum!" I screamed at her
"You need to get back on your feet, and he could help you do that," she tried to reason with me.
"Fuck you. You just want me out of your life, like you've always wanted," I said, inching closer and closer to her face.
"Thank you so much for looking out for your daughter by pimping her out to the next available man out there," I said as I pushed the door open and slammed it with anger.
With shaky hands I immediately pulled out my phone from my pocket.
Wiping my tear stained eyes as I scrolled through my contacts list looking for Darius's number.
I hated doing this.
Calling him anytime something shitty happened. Maybe she was right and I was always pulling the people around into my problems. Maybe I did need to get back on my feet and stop depending so much on people.
He picked up after the first ring.
"Hi Rea, what's up?" he said, his voice barely audible, the music in the background drowning him out.
My voice shaky, I croaked out barely holding my tears in.
"Could you come pick me up."