It started with a small piece of paper.
Phat didn't know when he had left it there.
She just saw it
in the morning,
placed on the bedside table,
neatly folded in half—
as if it was meant to be found,
yet not meant for anyone to see.
Her heart started beating faster,
even before she opened it.
Her hand reached out
slowly.
Just an ordinary piece of paper—
but heavier than it should be.
She unfolded it.
The handwriting was familiar.
Kan's.
"I don't know how I should say this.
Because every time I try,
you either go quiet
or choose to step back."
Phat pressed her lips together,
her eyes moving down line by line.
"But I still want to say it,
even if you don't want to hear it."
Her breathing slowed.
"I miss you.
Not just at night,
not just when we're together,
but all the time—
even when you're not in front of me."
Her heart tightened.
"I tried to act like it didn't matter,
like it was just something temporary,
but the more I tried,
the clearer it became."
She stayed silent.
"I remember everything.
From when we were kids,
when we stood there competing,
when you never really looked at me—
until now,
when you still don't."
Tears began to gather.
"But strangely,
I still want to stay here.
Even if it has no name,
no status,
and maybe no future."
Phat closed her eyes for a moment.
"Do you know
that every time I climb in,
it's not just because I want to see you,
but because I'm afraid
that if I don't,
I won't have any way to reach you at all."
A tear dropped onto the paper.
"I know it's wrong.
I know it's dangerous.
And I know it might make things harder for you."
"But I still choose you."
Her breath trembled.
"Even if you don't choose me."
Silence fell instantly.
"If one day you want me to disappear,
just tell me.
I'll go."
"But if you don't say anything,
I'll stay."
"Right here.
Where you let me stay."
—Kan
Phat lowered the paper,
her hand still trembling.
She didn't know how many times she had read it.
She only knew—
every word was too clear.
Too clear to ignore.
A soft sound came from the balcony.
She turned immediately.
A familiar figure
stood there.
Just like always.
Kan.
He didn't say anything.
He just stood there—
waiting.
As if letting her choose.
Phat tightened her grip on the paper.
Her heart pounded painfully.
For the first time,
she felt like the answer
was within reach.
And yet—
too dangerous
to hold.