Today is almost as refreshing than any other given day, and I couldn't be more grateful for that.
My last day of freedom until I go back to work, the kids have been enjoying themselves lately and am glad for that, especially Linda and Damian those poor kids deserve that time away, when I heard about what happened my mind went straight into action for those babies, no kids deserve to witness such of horrific events, till this moment I truly can't comprehend what John has done, because his not that type of person at all, maybe I didn't know him well as I thought.
Mike have been calling him none stop, even before Sammy got here he still haven't call us back, to be honest I am that close from allowing Mike to track his ass and fuck him up, because what the fuck, who the hell cheat on there wife and play the victim card, like you own her family that much.
The poor soul look so broken and miserable, I feel so sorry for her, Sammy is a sweethearts when me and Mike first started dating she was our number one supporter, she was there through our all ups and downs, so it breaks my heart to see someone as beautiful as her suffered so terribly.
But as day goes by I feel like her heart are building more walls than ever, I don't want to lose a friend let alone a sister, I can't watch her break down unto someone she isn't, so that why am doing everything I can to bring her back from the deep end she's letting herself into.
So as we watching the kids play together in the park, I decided to bring us some Ice cream, I won't push her to tell me anything but I want us to at least have some type of conversation towards were her heart is leading her, I own that to my husband at least, I want us to feel at ease when we can't be close to her for the next weeks or months that coming up, she be watching the kids play with a smile on her face, so am hoping we can at least have some kind of interaction.
Thank you Jaz for today, she said, I really needed, I know what you want to ask, so i wont hold you, she laughed my brother is pestering you, and I know you worrying yourself a lot, but to put it all together am feeling fine not better but fine enough to bring some sort of closure for my kids and my family, am heartbroken but I can't bring this emotions towards my babies it just unfair to them, plus I can't keep on letting my emotions run me over, you, grandma and Mike need a break from it all, so I need to get my head out off my ass, she laughed looking towards her kids.
Life is like a movie, you never know when things might happen, if you would have told me two months earlier that this is where we will be I would have laughed, but marriage is not a fairy tales it a reality, it an emotion, and every time you thought you know your heart, something always change, who would have thought that John the man that was making us laugh with is speech in his wedding anniversary, was about that action I wouldn't believe it, they marriage wasn't perfect but it wasn't let me go and cheat on my partner type of situation.
When you finally thought you were getting the idea of marriage, you see something like that it really started to get you wondering a lot more than you think.
I have so much fate in them, and still now I still do, maybe it was the conversation lacking, maybe it sex, am not defending John but the way he look at her with so much emotion and adoration, it have to be something that his holding him back, because John loves his kids, something have to be wrong and I truly believe it, my heart never fails me and am hoping she doesn't still.
It getting late kids it time to go back, um mommy can we stay a little bit longer, Ethan, fine fine let go guys, man I love those kids but sometimes they get on my nerves, you been in this parks for nearly five hours but yet it not enough, I turn next to Sammy helping her picking up our bags we brought, it was a hot day, and we needed as much snacks and drinks we can bring.
Holding our kids hand we decided to take the long walk home, it was a refreshing ride and we make as much talk we can, Sammy and the kids was enjoying themselves, and I couldn't be more glad, we walk for a good hours until we arrived on our block, I started walking a head to open the door because on our way home we brought some food and Sammy and the kids were very handfuls, so I decided to go up front to get the door, right in front of my mother in law front yard John sitting down head down like a broken glass.
John I call out to him, he look up at me standing up, he look behind me and he turn his head to the side his eyes couldn't even look at me, what are you doing here, we be calling you none stop and you barely answer and now you here, please tell me what the fuck is going on, he turn his head towards me and stared straight ahead, and that when I realized Sammy and the kids are here, standing behind me. John, Sammy Whispered.
Daddy, Linda screamed running toward her father, you here, I miss you so much papa, John bend down and pick her up, holding her as if he let her go she might disappear, I miss you to pumpkin, she hold his face, kissing her dad cheeks, you here now, Damian and mommy was crying a lot, but you here so no more crying anymore.
Oh poor soul, if only she knows.No I wasn't Damian scream, I turn around staring at them, Sammy look like she lost, her eyes fixed toward her husband and daughter, while Damian looked angry with tears in his eyes, I don't miss him anymore, you left papa, you left, John walk towards his wife and son, bent down with Linda, her little hand wrapped around his neck, holding him as if she doesn't want to let him go, am sorry kiddo, he pulled Damian towards him, am so sorry, Damian started to punch him everywhere, I hate you, I hate you , you bad daddy, you bad, you hurt mommy, you hurt her, you hurt me, John hold him even closer letting him give all his pain, I don't know what to do, all I can do is telling my kids to go inside, the bags that both Sammy and her kids was holding was on the floor, I quickly grab them and hand over to my kids, tell them to stay inside, Ethan knows how to handle the door.
When John finally calm Damian down he pick up both of his kids, and look at his wife, I think for a quick second, she was about to slap him but all she did is walk around him and walk inside, John look at me, I just shake my head and tell him to follow me inside.
There a lot of shit that about to happen and to be honest I feel like John purposely want to get killed, because be here at Sammy family house is the most dangerous move any person can make.
Today is really about to be a fucking nightmare.