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Chapter 131- It's Getting Away From Him.
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"I thought we were friends, Gilderoy," Sirius says, looking at me with betrayal in his eyes, but I see underneath the underneath. And while his eyes are full of betrayal, his sclera are vindictive and calculating. He said those words on purpose, to try and drag me down into the depths of badgering, nagging, torture hell.
"What the hell does he mean, Gilderoy?" Andromeda barks, and I sigh in frustration as the torture commences. I glare at Sirius, who smirks back at me with glee. "Don't trust the word of this fugitive, Andromeda. Remember, he just spent a good decade in Azkaban. No doubt his mind is in the drain." I respond with pettiness as I watch Sirius have genuine pain on his face, remembering his decade of suffering.
"Then, let's get him. If he resists and dies, then no one will care." Andromeda responds, lifting her wand in the air and readying herself to cast a spell, at which point I remember that this dude is actually innocent and my only male friend, even if we aren't that good friends and only went partying for one night. "Whoa, whoa, calm down, you psychotic woman. Don't go blowing up the place, the fucker is entirely at our mercy." I scream, readying myself to cast my own spells to keep this dirty fucker alive.
"He is a piece of shit! Do you know what I had to put up with because of him?" Andromeda shrieks, hysterical. "I was ostracised and hated by the pureblood society, with them on the lookout for any opportunity to hurt me, and then, because Sirius Black, the white sheep of the Blacks, turned out to be a madman and killer, I was no longer trusted by that light side either. I was in the middle with no one on my side and having to get by, by hiding at home and letting Ted go out into the world and providing for both of us." Andromeda starts waving her hands, putting me on edge since she is still holding her wand, but thankfully, she isn't slinging any spells.
"It was after twenty years- Twenty years! That finally I could come out and thankfully got a job working for this lovable idiot, and I was lucky, but here you are again, trying to ruin my life once more." Now that she actually explains it, I can understand her perspective. It was bad enough that she had struck out against her family by herself, but then she wasn't even trusted by those who might have done so, thanks to the actions of her cousin, whom they had already trusted and been burned by. Or so they believed they were.
"Gilderoy, let's be serious now," Sirius says, now no longer playing around and actually being serious, and you can tell by the fact he didn't say I am Sirius, as that would have meant he wasn't serious, but he is serious, so he doesn't do the Sirius joke... Wow, that was a lot of seriousness, but I think that all tracks. Sirius is definitely serious now, and I think we all know it... but just in case they don't...
"I think we can't all be serious, only you are Sirius." There is the sound of crickets in the air as no one reacts to that, and I feel a small, tiny part of myself shrivel up and die inside me as I just got stonewalled on a stupid joke that the situation definitely didn't call for, but I just couldn't control myself, and I had to do it. "Gilderoy, let's actually be. Now is not the time for games," Sirius says, being an adult for once, and I take that as the cue to walk over to him, my wand lowered to my side, and then stand beside him.
"Gilderoy, what are you doing? Get away from him!" Andromeda looks genuinely scared and worried for me, and I feel grateful and appreciative of her concern, however unneeded it may be. I go ahead and put my arm around Sirius and pull him in close to me, giving him a sidehug to show he is harmless. Though he definitely hurts my nose, it's too late to pull back now. "Okay, Andromeda, Sirius is innocent, and there is proof of it," I say, putting my hand on his head and ruffling his hair, causing the man to quickly shove me away and start combing his hair back into place, even though it is raggedy and stringy and nothing will fix it.
"W-What!? Don't joke the fuck around, Gilderoy. Be serious for once." Ah, damn, the cursed word made an appearance once more, and I so want to make another joke, but the anguish on Andromeda's face is real, and I do not want to prolong it. "I am being serious, Andromeda. He is truly innocent. I found out before I went on vacation, and Sirius here has been working to find that proof all this time and prove his innocence." Andromeda looks shocked.
"Trust me," I say, and I can see her start to come back to her senses. She then gets her game face on, becoming the rational, cold businesswoman I entrusted with all my operations, and stopping her emotions from overcoming her again. "...Okay, tell me everything, and don't leave anything out. Not a single piece of information, or I swear to Merlin I will castrate both of you and stick the chopped bits to the other's chin." We both shiver visibly at that, having mentally pictured it, and we both know that we can be nothing but forthcoming now.
Well, at least as forthcoming as I can possibly be on my end, I will never tell anyone of my otherworldly origins, as it just doesn't matter, and my previous life wasn't really important; it was just the base that was created, the foundation that was built for when I was thrust into this world. But the less I think about all that crap, the more sane and pleasant my current life will be. When you get bogged down by the whys and hows, then your life just becomes unending questions. It's better to just remain ignorant of the bigger things in life and enjoy your life in the pond. I'm not about to try and travel to other universes for no fucking reason, other than knowing that they exist.
"Well, I'm sure you can have a longer talk with your cousin at some point, but to cut a long story short. This guy thought it would be clever to tell everyone he was the secret keeper, but they actually made a guy whose animagus form is a literal rat, the secret keeper, and he ratted them out, and this idiot got blamed and has been wallowing in Azkaban ever since. Letting the real betrayer live scot free." I explain as succinctly as I can, and I'm pretty sure that I hit all of the major points.
"I didn't just let him live! He escaped after blowing himself up. I watched him slice off his own finger, and he blew up half the street. Muggles died, and I was disoriented when they scooped me up and stuck me in Azkaban. I was on that street, and then I was in Azkaban within the next ten minutes. No trial or anything, just straight to jail." Sirius tries to explain himself, while Andromeda figures the story out from context clues.
"Wait, Peter Pettigrew?" Andromeda questions.
"Okay, so you knew the guy was alive and you still just sat there in prison for a decade doing nothing but wasting away." I point out, and Sirius gets angry.
"I tried telling everyone, but no one would listen. I would scream for hours and hours, for who knows how long, but no one listened. And all of those scummy Death Eaters around me would just laugh and laugh the whole time. I didn't know where Pettigrew went. I would have thought he would have fled the country, and I would never see him again. Who would have thought he would be hiding as a pet at Hogwarts?" Sirius starts to wave his hands, emphasising his pain and anguish.
"Peter Pettigrew? He faked his death?" Andromeda asks again, only to be ignored.
"Still, you clearly had the ability to escape, but you still stayed there for a decade. You still chose to wallow there for no reason." I may have lost the point of this conversation and had it turned into an argument, but I am damned if I won't win it, or at least ragebait this stupid asshole.
"There was a reason! It's my fault they are dead! It was my idea to change the secret keeper!" It goes silent, and all we can hear is Sirius' deep breathing before he begins again, more calmly. "The only reason I chose to escape now is that I saw the rat was with the little Weasley, and I know all those Weasleys go to Gryffindor, and Harry will definitely be in Gryffindor, so I knew that the little rat bastard was in the same room where Harry sleeps. I know where the rat was, and I have to get him." Sirius sighs, wiping his sweaty forehead clean.
"...You are a stupid man." Andromeda says, and I nod my head in agreement, because Sirius something Black was defintely a stupid man. "Why the hell are you nodding, you are a bloody buffon as well." Andromeda shouts at me, and I recoil in shock, wondering what the hell did I do to get lambasted in with this mangy dog.
"I believe you, Sirius, because I believe this blonde-haired buffoon. My boss is an idiot sometimes, but he is generally on the right side of things, and he has a good heart. So if he trusts you, I trust you." Oh shit, I have a good heart? Since when? If she was talking physically, then yeah, I do, potions help with keeping a healthy body, and also I have some magical animal hearts as my property for potions and stuff, but she means spiritually, I have a good heart... I just don't know if that is actually true. I am a pretty unrepentant piece of shit generally.
"I appreciate that, cousin. Really, I do." Sirius wipes the sweat of his brow, sighs, and breathes a sigh of relief before smiling happily. "So do you think you could let me go now, and I can get back on with my mission to hunt the rat bastard down and separate him limb by limb before blowing him to smithereens?" He has a manic gleam in his eyes, and he fantasises about what he would do to Pettigrew, and Andromeda and I are visibly weirded out. But while I am content to just ignore it and let the man do whatever he wants since it's none of my business, Andomreda doesn't let it go.
"I think what you mean to say, Siri, is that you are going to hunt down Peter Pettigrew and capture him, alive, and reveal his crimes to the world. And then, with you now proven innocent, you are going to become that boy's guardian and look after him as much as you possibly can, like your best friend and his wife wanted you to." Yeah, you tell him, Andromeda. Tell him to get his broke ass off that fucking couch and start paying his child support and looking after his kid like a real godfather and not the waste of space unemployed fugitive he currently is.
Wait... no, I don't want that. That would completely fuck up the story and derail everything, and then I would have no idea what the fuck is going on and therefore be in constant danger as I wouldn't know what to avoid or how the story would turn out. Maybe if Sirius actually takes Harry in, then Voldemort will somehow win, or Sirius will fuck things up, and then the world is fucked, and all of us will die, and my perfect life will be over. I can't let that happen, no, I won't let that happen.
"Wait, you want this guy to look after Harry!?" I shout, surprise and shock coating my words in copious amounts. "This guy! This guy, who was so irresponsible and idiotic that he trusted a literal rat with the lives of his best friend, his best friend's wife and their one-year-old son? Do you want that kid to die too!?" I exclaim, making sure to get my point across in the harshest way possible to really make the lesson stick and make sure that Sirius black does not prove his innocence.
"Gilderoy! Stop!" Andromeda shouts at me, but it is too late; the words have been said, and they can't be taken back. Yes, I do feel bad about it, but it is for the greater good. This way things will stay on track, Sirius will continue to try and kill Pettigrew, which will end up with him getting Remus Lupin's help, and in the shrieking chack they will confront the rat. Then Harry will convince Sirius to capture him, and he will agree, and then, Peter, being the rat he is, will end up finding a way to escape, and then he will run to Voldemort, leading to the dark lord's resurrection and the events of the Triwizard tournament. Yes, for that Sirius will have to... Wait...
"He's right, Andromeda. I'm not good with a kid. I wasn't before Azkaban, and I sure as hell am not after it. I'll give the kids nightmares. It would be better for me to stay away from him and leave him alone to have a good life instead of dragging him down into the muck with me." Sirius says self-deprecatingly, and very much having taken my words to heart. Which I now realise is actually fucking bad. This guy is a fuck up; that is basically his whole character. If he wants to capture Pettigrew, then he will definitely get away, so I just fucked things up.
"No, don't say that, Sirius. I dind't mean it like that. I just meant, well... uh," I look towards Andromeda for help, but she just looks back at me with a cold look that makes it clear that she won't be helping me, and she is judging me. Well, I could do some motivational speeches, right? "Listen, you were in the middle of a war, so you made a mistake in the height of the moment, and some terrible things happened because of that. But it was war, you were seeing horrific things and watching people die and fighting for hours on end with barely any sleep. And you made a mistake and trusted someone that everybody else trusted too, and that includes James, Lily and Dumbledore. They all made the same mistake, they all did, and you have all paid for it in some way." Shit, where the hell am I going with this?
"And no, you've just spent a long ass time in a prison that's a massive fucking tower surrounded by water on all sides. And you've only had death eaters, criminally, floating masses of despair that are hungry for other people's despair and bad memories for companions." Wow, this guy's life has been depressing. Where was I going with this again? "So, basically what I am trying to say is that... you need a bit of help to become a functional person again and relax from all of those experiences. And then, once you are a normal, as close to normal as people like us can get, you can look after Harry." Whew, there, I think I covered all of my bases there, and that should get the story back on track. Now Sirius will go after Pettigrew to capture him, and Peter should escape, given the opportunity.
"Pick a lane, why don't you, Gilderoy?" Andromeda says, but when I look over at her for the cutting remark, she is actually smiling at me. Hm, it seems like I actually did the right thing then. And looking at Sirius, while he isn't quite as happy as Andromeda, he is definitely pensive and thinking about things. I'm not quite sure, but one conversation or interaction won't change much, and so things should still go the same way.
"Well, forget about all of that for now. The first thing we should be doing is contacting Professor Dumbledore and informing him of the situation , and seeing if there would be any way for him to aid us in capturing Pettigrew." Andromeda says, and I do my utmost to keep my poker face and not show how much I don't like any of what she just said. Not only does she want to get Dumbledore involved, but she herself is already invested in this. She is along for the long run, and she isn't going to stop for anything. I know her. It's why I like her, a nd it's also why she is such a massive pain in my ass sometimes.
"Well, I'm sure Sirius could have actually contacted Dumbledore if he could have. There must have been a reason why he hasn't done so. Right, Sirius?" I look towards the man, hopeful that he will have an explanation so we can keep things somewhat on track. "Uh, actually, I couldn't see a way to get a message to him without being caught. But you guys can solve that now." Sirius explains, ruining my every plan. I know things are off course now, and there is nothing I can do about it.
"Well then, I guess you have everything figured out. You two start making plans or whatever, meanwhile, I have a busty barmaid to go and pleasure. See ya." I say, no longer wanting to be here, and here the world stops going according to plan; instead, I am going to go and have angry sex with a blonde busty woman.
Yes, I could have mindwhgammied these guys and put things back on course, but Sirius is my only guy acquaintance, and Andromeda is...
I'm going to fuck the shit out of the horny lady who is waiting on me.
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Don't know if this chapter is good or not, but I picked a direction, and I'm sticking to it. Shit's changing whether he wants it or not.
Upcoming Chapters:
Free: Chapter 132- Have At Her!
Hero: Chapter 133- Remarkable.
Super: Chapter 135- Magical Manhunter.
Legendary: Chapter 137- Happy?
Galactic: Chapter 141 - Rat Pursuit
Mythic: Chapter 149 - The Place
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That is all for now. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. See you in the next one!
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