The guild hall was still buzzing from the earlier chaos of kai and erza's fight, when Erza Scarlet returned hair wet fresh mind and a new armour—walking through the doors like a scarlet storm with purpose burning in her eyes. Even the rowdiest members instinctively straightened up. You could practically feel the air shift.
Lucy blinked, feeling the seriousness settle. *So this is Erza when she's not fighting Kai…*
Erza didn't even acknowledge the broken tables still scattered around from her duel with Kai. That alone said how focused she was.
"Everyone," Erza said sharply, "a Dark Guild is moving towards oshibana train station. Their target is unknown but we can't be lenient who knows what they are planning specially since from what I heard they have a cursed artifact in their possession i can't tell you everything here but it's really important and we need to deal with this since master isn't here."
The room tensed. Even Mira paused mid-cleaning. Natsu and Gray turned grim but excited.
But one person reacted instantly.
Kai, lazily leaning backward on his chair (balancing on only two legs), suddenly let the chair slam down as he stood up straight.
"Artifact and cursed?" his golden eyes sharpened. "As in the cursed artificial demon crafts of zeref?" A grin crept across his face. "That's… interesting."
Lucy blinked. "You know what that is?"
Kai shrugged. "Cursed constructs. Souls embedded into metal. Ancient enchantments. One-of-a-kind engineering." His tone dropped into a low hum of excitement. "Of course I know it."
Of course he did. Lucy was starting to understand that Kai always seemed to know things he technically had no way of knowing , the glow is his face was same one he has when he stole her keys .
Erza's eye twitched the second she saw the excitement on his face.
"Kai," she warned, voice low and commanding, "You are not coming."
Kai blinked, then pointed at himself like, Who, me?
"Yes," Erza snapped. "You."
"Too bad," Kai said, already stepping forward. "I'm coming."
"No, you're not."
"Yes, I am."
"No, you're—"
"Yes."
"I said NO!"
"Yes, Red." He tapped her armored shoulder. "Don't stress. We'll discuss your delusional thoughts on my absence later."
Erza sucked in a breath like she was preparing to blast Kai through a wall.
"You are forbidden," she said, annunciating every syllable, "from touching, dismantling, analyzing, fiddling with, poking, prodding, unscrewing, un-enchanting, breathing near, or even thinking about whatever that thing is ."
Kai nodded." Did you say something red? If not I will see you Tommorow". Then walked straight past her.
As if she hadn't spoken at all.
Erza twitched violently. "I wasn't DONE TALKING!"
Kai kept walking.
Lucy whispered, "H-He just walked away from Erza…"
Gray shook his head. "Idiot's got a death wish…"
Natsu shrugged. "This is normal."
BOO
A demonic-looking mask slid into Mira's peripheral vision.
She screamed so loudly the windows shook, leaping up in reflex—her heel catching the edge of a table leg behind her.
Kai moved in a blur.
He caught her around the waist (slightly too low), stopping her fall, and grabbed the toppling beer jugs all in one smooth motion.
"Whoa there, White. Careful."
Mira blinked tears away. "K-Kai!! Don't scare me like that!"
Kai smirked."Where's the fun in that beside it was joke."
Mira just sighs looking at him thinking' he is just like always', before her attention went to where his hand was resting.
"Kai That's… not my waist," Mira said through clenched teeth.
Kai hummed. "Huh it isn't ?." He looks down before laughing ."Oh man and here I was thinking you got fat—good to know it's just your as—"
"STOP TALKING!". Mira shouts .
She swung at him, but he simply wasn't there anymore. Mira stumbled, flustered, as he walked away whistling.
"I hate you, Kai!" she cried.
"Love you too, White," he called back.
As he passed Erza, he added casually, "Red, learn something from White—wait, actually don't. Diversity is charming. Would be boring if I couldn't play with you this way."
Erza sputtered, face reddening for a very different reason.
Elfman came to help his sister locked between confusion and his duty to protect her but well kai was also friend and mira seems more lively even though she was embarrassed. He still asks."you ok mira ." Mira nods smiling." It's nothing elf you know how kai is."
Cana's voice came through."We all do he is asshole ." She smirks."but lovable."
"Good save cana i was just about to bite you." Cana not realising where the voice was coming from still lost in her drink just hummed." I would have liked that." But her smirk vanishes when Kai suddenly appears behind her causing her to panic and choke on her drink as kai laughs patting her back." Oh take it slow my semi nude alcoholic it will be shameful if our drinking queen died choking on alcohol."
Cana red faced form coughing glares at him."What the hell was that you idiot can't you speak before sitting behind someone."
Kai stares amused." That exactly what I did fart for brains actually I-." Cana looked at kai who had suddenly stopped speaking and asks confused."you what,hey you in there ?why are you staring at my face like that ?." Kai suddenly leaned forward raising a hand towards her face as he mutters."Nothing I was just staring at the most beautiful person in this world."
Cana flushes red as she stutters."eh-h what i-." She quickly turns away but kai grabs her chin gently turning her towards himself." Don't turn away cana how else will I look at my reflection if you close your eyes."
As his words settled down cana froze realising what happened as kai laughs loudly slamming the desk, macao , wakaba, laki, max and other members laugh as well saying."you fell for the same old joke again cana."while mira erza just sigh and lucy watches this amused and confused m
Cana face red turns towards kai angry."you damn ." But before she could kai had appeared behind her again as he wraps his arms around her neck laughing as she tries to hit him he just laughs saying."sorry cana i just thought you wouldn't like if I didn't greet you properly since I already greeted natsu, gray, erza and mira ." Cana now calm stops hitting him and sighs." I would have preferred if you didn't greet me rather than doing this."
The next second kai vanishes from behind cana who sighs before her eyes land on two bottles placed on her table it was the centuries old preserved alcohol only high status people could afford for fancy parties, she remembered telling kai to get them from her last time 'i hadn't thought he would actually take this seriously ' she just laughs what was i thinking."it's him obviously he would be so dramatic just so he doesn't seem mellow while giving me the gift."
Lucy whispered, "Is… this normal?"
Mira wiped her eyes. "He used to be worse."
Lucy was horrified.
Mira added softly, "But he's not actually mean. Just… I guess kai'sh, and speaking of kai why don't you join them in the mission it will a great experience."
Lucy somehow understood exactly what that meant.
**The Train Station Incident**
The next day when they all gathered at the station, Lucy nearly fell over, first because of natsu and gray clashing first things in the morning as she stood with happy watching them and second because of erza.
Erza stood there like a walking moving company—bags stacked higher than her head, swords strapped across multiples, shields, armor chests, crates…
"How long is this mission…" Lucy muttered.
Erza turned to her smiiing."we should be prepared for anything although I believe we never introduced ourselves you are a new member right."
Lucy nods a bit stiff." Yeah I am lucy and mira told me it would be a good example to learn in this mission with you guys."
Erza pats her shoulder causing her to wince." It's nice to meet you lucy i remember you now you are the one who beat the gorilla with one finger."
Lucy was dumbfounded staring at erza."I did?"
Behind her, Kai strolled over with nothing but his tiny pouch.
"Hey," Kai called lazily, "my walking junkyard finally arrived."
Erza's eyebrow twitched. "Call me that again and I'll requip into something you'll regret."
Kai leaned closer. "Red, everything you requip is something I regret."
Lucy slapped a hand over her mouth to hide her laugh.
Although natsu gray and happy weren't so lucky as they ended up laughing loudly only to end up punched in the head.
But as they were about to board natsu suddenly turns to erza challengingly with a smirk."Oi erza I will only come on one condition you and kai will fight me after we return I will defeat you and take revenge on kai for throwing that underwear in my mouth."
Erza also smiles back."I like your confidence natsu very well once we return from the mission I will have a proper spar with you."
Kai just sheugs walking away." Sure but if you lose you will put that same underwear in your mouth willingly if you agree then I am in or you can back out if you are scared."
Natsu was slightly hesitant at the condition but after kai told him to back out if he was scared he growls fire erupting in his eyes." You are on you freak ."
Happy just sighs." He fell for the bait as well."
While gray just growls." Why are you putting my clothes in your fight."
Inside the train, Erza unloaded half the armory onto the seats. Kai sat cross-legged beside her, leaning against the window as if the world had no weight.
Lucy turns to natsu before grimacing at his face already turning green and turns to gray on her other side and whispers."if erza hates him so much why is she sitting beside him." Gray just hums."probably to hit him faster when he does something to annoy her."
As Erza began outlining the Lullaby situation, Natsu started turning green more and more.
Lucy leaned in worried. "Natsu… are you okay?"
He groaned in answer, sliding down the seat."I am dying."
Erza sighed. "As usual… I'll just knock him out—"
"Wait," Kai said, raising a hand. "No violence yet, let me test something this is a good opportunity."
Kai reached into his pouch.
…and kept reaching.
…and kept reaching.
…and kept reaching.
Lucy's eyes widened. "How big is that thing?!"
Kai didn't look up. "Ask me that in bedroom, blondie."
Lucy choked. "I DIDN'T MEAN—THAT'S NOT—!"
Erza sighs red faced." Ignore him lucy he says stupid things when he doesn't know the answer."
Lucy stopped surprised."Really?"
Kai still didn't look up, rummaging deeper.
Metal clinks. Glass vials. Springs. Gears. Random spark noises. A duck squeaker. Something that hissed. Something that *mooed*.
"W-What is he doing…?" Lucy whispered.
Gray sighed. "Improvised gadget time."
Natsu, pale and trembling, shook his head. "No… no… I don't want… anything he built in 10 seconds… I refuse—!"
Kai mashed a glowing crystal, two screws, a wire, and something that looked suspiciously like a toy into his palm—where it fused together with flashes of blue light.
"Kai…" Lucy whispered, both horrified and amazed. "That shouldn't be possible."
Kai hummed. "Lots of things shouldn't be possible. I do them anyway."
He held the object over Natsu.
"No," Natsu whispered, backing up. "NO—GET IT AWAY—! I am fine-"
Erza simply grabbed Natsu's jaw, pried it open, and—
"Wai—mmph!! Erza donn do thiis"
Kai flicked the gadget into Natsu's mouth.
It glowed.
Natsu spasmed—
ZAP.
Then suddenly went calm.
"Oh," Erza blinked. "It works."
Natsu sat peacefully, eyes blank, steam lightly drifting from his ears.
Kai nodded. " It has a side effect: occasional paralyzing shock every few seconds. You can spit it out if you prefer the motion sickness."
ZAP.
Natsu twitched violently but better smirks."hell no this is far--- better than the sickness."
Kai shrugged. "Yeah you get little shocks every now and then but hey. No motion sickness."
Lucy stared at him like he was some kind of phenomenon.
"it actually worked?"
Kai stares at her." What were you expecting I made that although it can explode and paralyse him the chances are low."
Lucy stares horrified."It will explode inside his mouth ?."
"Probably," Kai admitted easily.
Another ZAP shot through Natsu, who twitched like a ragdoll.
Erza sighed."let's stop discussing this now we have bigger problems to deal with than natsu's motion sickness."
They all finally leaned in as gray natsu and lucy spoke ." Alright what is it erza you said you will tell us during the mission."
Kai also nods rubbing his hands together in excitement." Yeah for a change I agree with the idiots do tell what is that artifact or its name."
They all sighed clearly seeing that kai was more interested in artifact than stopping the dark guild.
Erza takes a deep breath."It's the demonic flute lullaby."