We arrived in São Paulo. The promise of autumn brought a cutting wind. Icy gusts howled over the city. Storms danced through shadows and steel. Yet the cold inside me was unlike any other.
We checked into Verdant Suites.
I threw myself onto the bed when we entered the room. Rested.
Then my Maiden turned her attention to the desperate urge for a bath. A truly comfortable bath. A feeling of serenity. Peace, free of listening for every sound or calculating escape routes. So simple. So unreachable. Could there be a worse moment for such vulnerability? The thought was definitely frightening. Argh. I shuddered just thinking about it.
I ran the bath, put my clothes in the expresswasher, and looked in the mirror. My reflection stared back. But was it me?
When I traced the scars on my neck, my skin tingled. A shiver climbed my spine, as though the pain were still there, throbbing beneath the surface.
Each mark was a story I wanted to forget. Yet remembered. I recalled every pain. A punch splitting my eyebrow. A knife tearing the skin of my arm. The largest: the enormous X on my back. A target. Were they really going to use me as a target? A sour taste flooded my mouth.
I only had glimpses of what happened. I had been unconscious most of the time. Imperfect memories, except that I felt everything happening as though I were still there. When they exposed my back. Denden swearing at them. Telling me to hold on.
Then the pain. The open wound. Cold metal warming against my skin. Iron striking my bones over the sound of screams muffled by exhaustion. The soldier pulled my hair, forcing me to face him. His cold eyes. Disinterested.
I could barely see. The knife slid over my skin before piercing it. The cold of the metal was the last thing I felt before pain devoured everything. Tearing. Passing through. My vision darkening with unbearable pain. I sighed.
A target.
My suffering mattered little. My desire to die with every passing minute meant nothing. All irrelevant. They had stopped seeing me as a living being. I was nothing.
A target. I closed my eyes. No. I had to face this. I would overcome it.
I moved closer to the mirror. Strands of hair concealed the scars on my head. I touched the two marks on my neck, running from my ears to my throat. My entire body…
Water overflowed onto the floor.
I got into the bath. Wrapped my arms around myself and closed my eyes. Steam danced in the air. I inhaled deeply. Held it. Exhaled slowly, as though trying to convince my body it was safe. Hot water mingled with the cold in my skin, reaching what had been etched into my bones.
I pushed the dark thoughts away. If I had endured everything I went through, it was because I had kept Maia in my thoughts.
I finished bathing and returned to the bedroom.
Kiara worked on a holoscreen. "Better?"
I nodded. Combed my hair into a braid. How did she feel? How difficult had it been for her when Maia…? The name caught in my throat. I wanted to ask… No. I wanted to think of something better.
Kiara stayed quiet. Only nodded faintly, as though she already knew the question I had asked only within my soul.
I wished her good night.
Slept.
S-2879 • L11 Irraluna • D19 Unabe
"Irraluna radiates light in a gentle curve. Unabe kindles an axis in clear descent.
The tide draws a route in living silver. The story carries on steadily, in a deep tone."
Light rain trickled from the sky, like a remnant still glowing.
"Few hours before we meet Saymon. Gonna take care of some things." Her voice sounded impatient. Kiara left quickly. Seemed to be running from an illusory clock.
I rested my arms on the windowsill. What could the surprise be? Ovulation stirred my imagination, but I turned the possibilities over and nothing made sense. Well, perhaps that was better. The unknown unsettled me. Truth was, I had already been inside it for eons.
I admired Tentro's bustling streets.
Hololights flashed in vibrant shades. Blue, purple, and red danced in harmony. Reflected in the glass like shimmering specters. Ghosts of a world spinning too fast to reach.
Merchants' shouts mingled with the hiss of adware. Among it all, the mercenaries' heavy presence intimidated. They carried more weapons than clothing. Powerful animals accompanied them.
One, a tiger with nanoimplants in his paws, moved with a machine's precision. His eyes were pure instinct. Such charming animals. Majestic. I wished I could pet one. Would he let me?
My gaze swept over couples holding hands. Amid the city's bustle, they found each other with a simple glance, as though the rest of the world disappeared.
I breathed warm air through my nose against the glass, fogging it. With cold fingers, I drew circles in the fleeting mist.
The memory of that day seeped in, trickling like the rain outside.