You can read more ahead at.
Eldritch Horror? No, I'm A Doctor
Read up to 10-12 chapters ahead
Access exclusive character portraits
Q&A
Dimensional Librarian Available now on Patron!!!
Your support means the world to me and will help me keep creating this story. If you enjoy the ride so far, please consider joining every bit of support helps! ❤️
Link
https://patreon.com/Thanarit?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLink
"Hello, Henry."
"Hey, Nox. Good morning or afternoon, Guild Master."
Ren and Lu Changcheng walked into the private hospital room at Dao Guild's medical wing. The room smelled of antiseptic and clean linens, with afternoon sunlight streaming through the large windows. Medical equipment hummed quietly in the background.
Henry lay propped up in the hospital bed, both arms missing from the shoulders down. White bandages wrapped around his torso and the stumps where his arms used to be. Dark circles under his eyes showed he hadn't been sleeping well. Hans sat in a chair beside the bed, his leg elevated and wrapped in bandages. Irene occupied another chair near the window, her head still wrapped but her eyes alert.
"Just call me Ren, Henry. There's no point hiding my face and name from comrades who lost their arms trying to protect me. That's the least I can do." Ren pulled off his mask and tucked it into his coat pocket.
Vrzzz. Vrzzz.
CPR floated beside Ren in his puppy form, chainsaw head tilting curiously at the injured hunters.
Henry squinted at Ren's face, then nodded slowly. "Okay, so that's your name, huh? Fitting."
"But may I ask a question?" Henry shifted uncomfortably on the bed, trying to find a better position without the use of his arms.
"Sure."
"Ren, what the fuck is that?" Henry stared at CPR with wide eyes.
"His name is CPR and he's gonna help assist me in getting your arms back."
"Huh, that's possible?" Henry's eyebrows shot up in surprise.
Hans leaned forward in his chair. "But Ren, last time you told us that you couldn't regenerate limbs yet."
"Did you gain a new skill?" Irene chimed in from her spot by the window.
"Well, something like that." Ren rubbed the back of his neck.
Hans's expression became serious. "But Ren, please don't scare us like that again when you transform into that thing. We thought we lost you."
Ren's face fell with genuine remorse. "Sorry. I literally almost died, you know. Like, decapitation."
"And please keep what happened that day a secret."
"Of course. We already spoke about this with the Guild Master." Hans gestured toward Lu Changcheng.
"Then are you ready, Henry?"
Henry visibly shivered, his shoulders tensing. "Is there no other way? Like prosthetic limbs or something?"
Lu Changcheng chuckled, crossing his arms. "We can certainly give you that, but those things won't be as good as the real ones. You may have to drop a few ranks."
"Fuck, I'd rather die."
"Then how about we begin?"
Henry's shoulders dropped in defeat. "Fine. Please be quick."
Ren turned toward the others. "Well, everyone please go out and wait."
"Unless you want to be traumatized."
"Sure."
"Sure."
"Sure."
Everyone said in unison. Having witnessed Ren's healing in action before, they knew exactly what to expect. Hans pushed himself up from his chair with a grunt, favoring his injured leg. Irene stood more smoothly but still moved carefully. Lu Changcheng held the door open for them.
"Now, Henry."
As soon as the door clicked shut, Ren's transformation began. His head split open like a blooming flower, revealing ten black tentacles that emerged with wet, slithering sounds. Each tentacle held a surgical instrument that looked like it had been forged in the depths of cosmic horror. Scalpels with too many edges, clamps with teeth, needles that seemed to bend reality around them.
"Shall we begin?"
VRZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!
CPR transformed with a mechanical roar that shook the windows. The rusty, blood-stained chainsaw materialized in the air, its blade spinning with terrifying enthusiasm. Four more tentacles erupted from Ren's back with tearing sounds, immediately wrapping around CPR's handle.
Henry's eyes went wide with terror. "Can you at least knock me out, Ren?" His voice trembled as he watched the nightmare medical equipment arrange itself around his bed.
"Of course I can, but that won't be fun." One of Ren's tentacles produced a syringe filled with green liquid that seemed to glow with its own inner light.
"Wait, what do you mean it won't be—"
The tentacle struck like a snake, plunging the needle into Henry's neck before he could finish protesting. The green liquid spread through his system instantly.
"What the hell did you just inject me with?" Henry tried to move his arms, then remembered he didn't have any. But something was wrong. His body felt completely numb, like his entire nervous system had been wrapped in cotton.
"Awakened anesthetic. You'll be completely numb and immune to pain, but unfortunately, you'll remain fully conscious and aware of everything." Ren's voice carried a note of cheerful malice.
"Curse youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!" Henry shouted as realization dawned. His body went completely limp, but his eyes remained wide and alert. "NONONONONONONO, fuck no, Nox!"
"Let the surgery begin."
What happened next would have driven lesser minds to madness.
Ren's tentacles moved with surgical precision, but the methods were pure cosmic horror. One tentacle produced what looked like a bone drill made of crystallized screams. Another held a clamp that seemed to exist in more dimensions than the room could contain. The chainsaw's roar filled the air as CPR spun with mechanical joy.
The anesthetic kept Henry from feeling any physical pain, but it couldn't protect his mind from the visual horror of watching his own reconstruction. He could see everything with perfect clarity while being completely unable to move or look away.
"AHHHHHHHHHH! I CAN SEE YOU PULLING THINGS OUT OF MY SHOULDER SOCKET!" Henry's voice cracked with psychological terror as tentacles probed the stumps of his arms.
Ren's surgical technique defied all conventional medicine. Instead of simply growing new arms, he was apparently rebuilding Henry's entire shoulder structure from the inside out. Tentacles disappeared into wounds that opened like flowers, manipulating bone and muscle in ways that shouldn't be possible.
The chainsaw sound wasn't just noise. Each revolution of CPR's blade seemed to encourage new growth. Where the mechanical roar touched, flesh began to sprout like fast-forwarded plant growth. Bones extended from his shoulder stumps, growing in spirals that followed patterns Henry's mind couldn't comprehend.
"STOP! PLEASE! I CAN SEE MY BONES GROWING LIKE VINES!" Henry's screams echoed off the hospital room walls.
Outside in the hallway, Hans, Irene, and Lu Changcheng stood in a tight group, all three unconsciously huddled together for comfort.
"AHHHHHHHHHHH! MY SHOULDER BLADE IS OPENING LIKE A FLOWER!"
Hans winced and covered his ears. "Is it just me, or are the screams getting more creative?"
"They're definitely getting more descriptive." Irene nodded sympathetically. "Poor Henry."
Lu Changcheng checked his watch with practiced calm. "He's been screaming for about three minutes now. Last time with the brain fried victim, it took five minutes total."
"REN! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! OH GOD, I CAN SEE INDIVIDUAL MUSCLE FIBERS WEAVING THEMSELVES TOGETHER!"
"Should we..." Hans gestured vaguely toward the door.
"Absolutely not." Lu Changcheng shook his head firmly. "I don't want to see whatever going on in that room"
"WHAT IS THAT SPINNING SOUND! WHY IS MY NEW ARM GROWING TO THE RHYTHM OF THE CHAINSAW!"
Irene sat down on a bench in the hallway, her face pale. "I'm starting to feel bad for Henry."
"We all feel bad for Henry." Hans limped over to sit beside her. "But we also want him to have his arms back."
"THE TENTACLES ARE BRAIDING MY NERVES TOGETHER! THIS ISN'T MEDICAL! THIS IS HELL!"
A nurse walked by carrying a tray of medical supplies. She paused, looked at the door where the screaming was coming from, then looked at the three hunters sitting outside.
"Routine procedure," Lu Changcheng explained with a straight face.
The nurse nodded knowingly and continued on her way, apparently don't want to get involve in any of this.
"I CAN SEE MY ELBOW FORMING! IT'S GROWING BACKWARDS FIRST THEN FLIPPING AROUND!"
"Did he just say his elbow is growing backwards?" Hans asked with morbid curiosity.
"Don't think about it too hard," Irene advised. "I made that mistake last time and had nightmares for a days"
"MY HAND IS STARTING! I CAN SEE THE FINGER BONES SPROUTING LIKE TREE BRANCHES!"
Lu Changcheng started pacing back and forth in the hallway.
"The good news is that Henry's describing everything in great detail, which means the procedure is working perfectly."
"THE CHAINSAW IS SINGING TO MY NEW MUSCLES! THEY'RE SINGING BACK!"
"Okay, that's definitely not normal surgery," Hans muttered.
"Nothing about Ren is normal surgery," Lu Changcheng replied. "But it works."
"I CAN WIGGLE MY NEW FINGERS! BUT I CAN ALSO SEE THE TENDONS BEING INSTALLED LIKE PUPPET STRINGS!"
Irene buried her face in her hands. "I can't decide if that's fascinating or horrifying."
"Both," Hans and Lu Changcheng said simultaneously.
"THE SECOND ARM IS STARTING! OH GOD, THE SECOND ARM IS STARTING! I'M NOT READY TO WATCH THIS TWICE!"
"None of us are ever ready," Lu Changcheng said philosophically.
The screaming continued for another two minutes, with Henry providing a running commentary of his own reconstruction that was somehow worse than silent horror would have been.
"MY LEFT HAND IS WAVING AT MY RIGHT HAND! THEY'RE INTRODUCING THEMSELVES!"
Then, suddenly, the screaming stopped.
The silence was almost worse than the screaming.
"Is he dead?" Hans whispered.
"Ren doesn't let patients die," Lu Changcheng said confidently.
"They might wish they were dead during the procedure, but they don't actually die."
The door opened, and Ren emerged, his appearance completely normal except for some blood splatter on his coat. He was smiling pleasantly as if he'd just finished a pleasant conversation rather than cosmic horror surgery.
"Henry's ready to see visitors now." Ren wiped his hands on a surgical towel that immediately burst into flames and disappeared.
They filed back into the room to find Henry sitting up in bed, staring in amazement at his two perfectly functional arms. He was flexing his fingers and rotating his wrists, testing the new limbs with wonder. The anesthetic had apparently worn off, because he was moving them freely.
"They work," Henry said in amazement. "They actually work perfectly."
"Of course they work." Ren looked slightly offended. "I'm a professional."
"But the screaming..." Hans started.
"Oh, that." Ren waved dismissively. "The awakened anesthetic keeps you from feeling pain but leaves you fully conscious and aware. It's necessary for precision work, but it does make the experience rather... memorable."
Henry stared at Ren with a mixture of gratitude and horror. "You could have warned me that I'd be awake to watch my own arms being grown like plants."
"Where's the fun in that?" Ren grinned.
Vrzzz. CPR, back in puppy form, wagged his tail proudly.
"Never again," Henry said firmly, still flexing his new fingers. "If I ever lose a limb again, I'm keeping the prosthetic."
"Your loss." Ren shrugged. "Cosmic horror surgery has a one hundred percent success rate."
"And a one hundred percent psychological trauma rate," Hans added.
"That's what makes it memorable," Ren replied cheerfully.
Henry tested his grip strength by making fists. "At least I can punch you properly now when I get my revenge."
"Looking forward to it," Ren said with genuine enthusiasm.
"But Ren why do look so pale"
" Well… I have to go to the bathroom for a bit"