Sunny almost laughed at how dumb Alucard sounded at that moment almost like a little kid. It was strange picturing him that way, especially considering this same person had almost killed him effortlessly just a few hours ago.
Still, Sunny decided to play along with Alucard, hoping to extract some valuable information out of him since he seemed in a good mood.
"Sure. I guess if I ever become a master, I'll remember this… and I'll be sure to feel stupid."
Alucard rolled his eyes again. He didn't have to of course Sunny literally couldn't see him, since he was currently invisible—but somehow, Sunny knew he was being obnoxious. Alucard truly had a talent for being obnoxious.
Sunny started with a simple question testing the waters.
"So… you never told me what you'd do if you escaped?"
Sunny was trying to poke an answer out of him. One of the best ways to understand someone's motives was to know their goals.
Alucard didn't bother hiding his. He just shrugged.
"Simple, really. I just want to go back to my family and live a normal, peaceful life."
Sunny didn't believe him—not for a second. He knew Alucard well enough to know his kill count was in the triple digits, and that didn't even include the likely thousands of nightmare creatures that had fallen to him. Normal was not a word that applied to Alucard.
But why would he lie about this in particular? Was he being completely honest or just twisting his words? Sunny decided to pry further.
"Really? I never pictured you as the family-man type."
Alucard chuckled.
"Neither did I, really. But you'd be surprised what years without a family can do to someone and their values."
Sunny knew all too well what it felt like to chase after family — to want to return to them, to have someone you could trust, and above all, to have something normal in this bizarre world. But what did Alucard even consider a "normal" life?
"Well, it makes sense you'd want to get back to them, but… what do you even mean by 'normal'? Will you try to become a master—or even a saint—someday?"
Alucard shrugged.
"Maybe I'll become a master, just so I can sleep in the real world again. As for becoming a saint… I don't know if I'd want that."
That was… an odd reason to become a master. He could just sleep in the dream realm if he really wanted. Sunny was about to ask again, but Alucard kept talking.
"As for a normal life? Probably just enjoying the simple luxuries without worry. Maybe find a girlfriend and start a family, visit the dream realm now and then for a relaxing picnic."
Sunny thought having a picnic in the dream realm was far from normal.
And judging by the way Alucard spoke Sunny guessed he probably grew up rich.
"Ah… and what exactly do you consider the luxuries of life?"
Alucard tapped his chin, thinking.
"Well… a normal luxury might be going to a restaurant and drinking coffee. Another might be watching shows whenever I want, snacking while I watch."
Sunny chuckled. Those things were far from normal for anyone on the outskirts, himself included. He'd only drunk coffee twice in his life—once before entering his first nightmare, and once before entering the dream realm.
Both times it had tasted terrible. Somehow, it was fitting that someone like Alucard enjoyed it.
Sunny was about to ask more questions when Alucard turned the table.
"Hey Sunny… curious… do you have any siblings?"
That was an odd question. Sunny hesitated, thinking carefully about how to answer to protect Rain from whatever Alucard might plan. Knowing him, he might use her as leverage, threatening her to get Sunny to comply.
"Yes… I used to have a sister before… ugh."
He pretended to sound uncomfortable, leaving the rest unsaid. Technically, he'd told the truth—they had been separated—but Alucard didn't need to know she was still alive. He let it sound like she had died.
Alucard looked at Sunny for a few seconds, then patted his back and sighed.
"Yeah… that must be rough to talk about."
He could tell Sunny was hiding something, but he decided to respect it. After all, whoever Sunny's sister was didn't really matter… did it? Alucard considered asking if she had been adopted, since Sunny looked so much like Rain, but he didn't.
Everyone looked alike anyway. He'd even been mistaken for Morgan of Valor as a kid, and later for someone from the Song clan. Alucard tried not to dwell on always being mistaken for women growing up.
Anyway, he didn't have more questions he truly needed to ask. Which meant he was content answering Sunny's questions for now.
"So… you? Do you have any siblings?"
Alucard chuckled.
"Yeah… three siblings, actually." He sounded way too proud. "First, my younger brothers, Luca and Dante. They always tried to fight me when they were younger… well… I won most of the time."
Sunny imagined what kind of monsters could beat Alucard as kids.
They didn't really match the siblings at all.
Sunny wasn't the best at imagining children.
"Luca was always the smarter one, while Dante usually just bickered and stole my things."
Alucard rambled on about his brothers' accomplishments—stories Sunny found uninteresting and useless.
After the fourth repetition of Luca winning first place in a first-grade math contest, Sunny decided to ask about his final sibling.
"Okay… I get the brothers, but didn't you say you had three siblings?"
Alucard nodded.
"Oh, right! I forgot my sister."
Sunny raised an eyebrow.
"A sister? What's her name?"
Alucard smiled.
"She has a weird name… like you. Her name is Rain."
Sunny froze. He stared at Alucard for a long moment before finally regaining his composure.
"Ah… yes. Quite the unique name. If you don't mind, could you describe what this Rain girl looks like?"
Alucard thought for a moment.
"Well… she kinda looks like you, except younger and way prettier. Not even close… no offense."
Sunny took a deep breath. His mind raced. He had to confirm one thing without making it obvious to Alucard.
"And… how old is she?"
Alucard quickly did the math.
"She was ten when I entered my first nightmare, so… twelve now."
Sunny slumped. He didn't know how to feel. One thing was certain—Alucard's sister… was his sister.
Sunny was saved from spiraling too deeply into his thoughts when Nephis finally walked over to him.
Unfortunately for Alucard, she did not notice him.
Her boot came down squarely on his chest.
Hard.
Nephis immediately froze, then stepped back just as quickly, clearly realizing she had stepped on something that absolutely should not have been there. Alucard, meanwhile, slowly got up from the ground, brushing imaginary dust off himself even though he knew full well that no one here could actually see him properly.
"Well," Alucard said casually, rubbing his chest, "that was certainly a very… unique way of greeting someone. Unfortunately, I'm not really into that."
Nephis stared at him for a few seconds longer than strictly necessary.
Not reacting. Not speaking. Just staring.
After a long — and I mean loooong — silence with absolutely nobody talking, Alucard thought about breaking the definitely above average silence.
Though let's be real… the length of the silence doesn't actually matter.
It's how you use it that counts, as we all know.
Eventually, Alucard decided that if no one else was going to do it, then unfortunately the burden of speaking fell to him.
"Um," he started, then stopped, then started again. "Could we maybe go somewhere more private? I'd… like to talk about how we're going to handle the future of our… friendship."
The moment the word left his mouth, Alucard knew.
He had chosen the absolute worst wording possible.
And he had said it directly in front of Sunny Sunless.
Fantastic.
At the very least, Nephis wouldn't misunderstand him, right?
…Right?
Then why was she staring at him like that?
And why was her grip tightening on her sword?
"Woah—hey," Alucard said quickly, raising his hands in surrender. "I understand how that sounded, but I definitely did not mean it that way. At all. I promise."
Nephis and Sunny both relaxed slightly, though neither of them looked convinced. Suspicion still lingered in the air like an unpleasant smell no one wanted to acknowledge.
Unfortunately for Alucard, this sort of thing happened a lot.
He was a vampire.
No matter how carefully he spoke, no matter how innocent his intentions, it always somehow sounded like he was either threatening someone or trying to seduce them. Sometimes both at the same time.
A shiver ran down his spine at the thought of how much worse this would get once he obtained the lineage of Lust—assuming it worked the way he thought it would.
Gods help me, he thought grimly. I'm never opening my mouth again.
Gluttony, of course, chose that exact moment to whisper something deeply unhelpful in his head.
Alucard ignored him.
Deciding it was safer not to think too hard about anything at all, Alucard simply followed Nephis and Sunny as they headed toward what Sunny had casually referred to as their "planning room."
The moment Nephis and Sunny entered, the entire group turned to greet them.
Well.
Almost everyone.
Cassie, the blind girl, did not greet them.
Instead, she was very clearly giving Alucard a dirty look.
While no one was staring.
Which, of course, made absolutely no sense.
She was blind.
There was no possible way she could be doing that.
…Unless she was lying.
Alucard frowned slightly.
She's definitely lying, he thought. No one can convince me otherwise.
Unfortunately, he didn't have time to further develop this extremely important theory, because Nephis calmly announced to the group that he was here.
Fantastic.
There went several contingency plans.
Oh well.
Alucard pulled back his hood, finally allowing everyone to get a clear look at him, and opened his mouth to introduce himself.
"Hello—"
He didn't get to finish.
Everyone shouted.
Specifically Caster.
Caster, who very nearly leapt behind Effie for protection before realizing how that probably looked and awkwardly stepping back out a few seconds later to regain some semblance of dignity.
Alucard briefly reconsidered his earlier decision to let Caster live.
Briefly.
"So," Alucard asked after the noise died down, tilting his head with genuine curiosity, "do I really look that bad?"
Everyone answered at once.
"Yes."
Well.
Everyone except Caster, who wisely chose silence.
And Cassie.
Because she was blind.
Alucard sighed.
"This is going to be a long night," he muttered to himself.