Yu Xian was instantly startled. A cold shiver crawled up his spine — something was terribly wrong. He turned his gaze back toward Qingque's face.
It was deathly pale.
Qingque looked as though she were enduring some kind of cruel, invisible torment. Though she tried to appear calm — the same carefree diviner who always pretended nothing bothered her — the effort was futile. The pain and fear radiating from her eyes were impossible to hide.
Her delicate features had lost all color. Her lips trembled, slightly parted as if she wanted to speak but could not. And in those gentle, jade-like eyes, there was a sorrow so deep it could break the hardest heart.
"Ah… ahhhh… aaaaaa…"
Qingque's voice was cracked and hoarse. She stared blankly at Yu Xian, struggling to form words that never came. The only thing that escaped her lips were broken, incoherent syllables — as though her lungs had been ripped apart and her voice lost forever.
Meanwhile, the small hand holding Yu Xian's tightened. Her grip grew stronger and stronger — far beyond what should have been possible. The power of Abundance surged through her body uncontrollably, twisting her strength into something fierce and desperate. Yu Xian winced as pain shot through his arm. He tried to pull away, but her trembling hand refused to let go.
Yet it was clear that Qingque was the one suffering more.
To her, holding his hand seemed like grasping a red-hot iron brand. The longer she clung to him, the more violently her body shook, and the more her expression twisted in agony. The once-lively girl now looked utterly pitiful — drenched in tears, her face contorted, her spirit on the verge of collapse.
Yu Xian's chest tightened. He wanted to speak — to calm her, to say anything that might soothe the storm inside her heart — but before he could, tears began to fall.
They came suddenly, like a dam breaking.
Though Yu Xian had seen signs of her breaking down, the moment it happened still struck him like a blade to the heart.
Qingque completely lost control. Her tears streamed down like rain, falling onto the cold tiles below with soft, wet taps. In seconds, her cheeks were soaked, her breath trembling with the sound of muffled sobs.
Choked gasps. Weeping. Silent, shaking cries.
Even as tears blurred her vision, Qingque stubbornly kept her eyes open, still looking at Yu Xian as though afraid he would vanish again. Her lips quivered, but no sound emerged — only that fragile, heartbreaking silence.
Then, at last, a voice broke through.
"Uh… uhh…" Qingque's eyes were bloodshot, her voice so faint it barely carried. "Yu Xian…"
Her trembling lips formed his name. She rose on her toes, inching closer — almost as if she wanted to kiss him — but the moment their eyes met, she froze.
Something inside her shattered.
Her body went limp, the strength draining from her completely. She began to fall backward.
This was a dream — Yu Xian knew she wouldn't feel pain even if she hit the ground — but his instincts overrode all logic. He caught her before she could fall, holding her tightly in his arms.
And in that instant, Qingque melted into his embrace.
Just a moment ago, she'd clung to him as though his touch burned her. Now she buried herself in his chest, trembling, clutching at him like a child afraid of the dark. It was as though he were her only source of warmth in a freezing, desolate world.
Qingque sniffled softly, her nose red from crying. She held onto him desperately, breathing in his warmth, refusing to let go.
"…I'm sorry."
Her voice was barely a whisper, fragile as falling snow. If Yu Xian hadn't been watching her so closely, he might've thought she was talking in her sleep — which, in a way, she was.
"It's all my fault… If I hadn't…"
No.
Yu Xian wanted to tell her she was wrong — that none of this was her fault. She wasn't a fighter. If she'd recklessly joined the battle, things might have been even worse. He wanted to say it, to ease her guilt…
But he couldn't.
The words caught in his throat, just like hers had. After a long pause, Yu Xian simply sighed and chose silence. Instead, he gently stroked her back, his hand moving slowly and carefully — the only comfort he could still offer.
"…Forget about all that," he murmured softly. "Come on, let's go play a few rounds of tiles."
"Play until you're smiling again. Just like before."
It was clumsy — an awkward attempt to cheer her up — but he had no better words. He tousled her soft hair and shifted the dream's scenery. The desolate streets dissolved into the warm, familiar atmosphere of a tile parlor.
"So? Not bad, right?" Yu Xian smiled gently. "Last time we were here, you kept losing and still wouldn't stop laughing. I liked that look on you."
Qingque sat down quietly, her eyes vacant.
Yu Xian forced a lighter tone and began setting up the tiles. He even created a few dream figures to fill the empty seats, their voices blending naturally into the background.
He thought maybe — just maybe — if he let her win, she'd feel a little better.
"Alright," he thought, glancing at her. "Let her win a few rounds. That'll cheer her up."
They played slowly. The atmosphere was strange, the laughter forced, the silence heavy. The dream NPCs tried to joke with Qingque, but she didn't respond. Her eyes were fixed on the tiles before her, her mind clearly far away.
That's fine, Yu Xian told himself. She just needs time.
As the game went on, victory began to lean in Qingque's favor. Yu Xian made sure of it — guiding her every draw, every move.
Yes… just like that. Let her win. Let her smile again.
Soon, the match reached its final round. Qingque only needed to play one more tile to win.
Yu Xian smiled softly. "Go ahead, Qingque… finish it."
Click.
A sharp sound cut through the quiet room. But it wasn't the sound of a tile being placed.
Yu Xian froze.
He looked up — and saw that Qingque's face was streaked with tears once more.
Her lips moved weakly.
"Don't…"
Yu Xian blinked. "What?"
"Don't… no…" Qingque's voice trembled, each word shaking like fragile glass. Her shoulders quivered. "I don't want to…"
Her trembling hand hovered over the table — then curled into a fist, her knuckles turning white.
Yu Xian stared, heart pounding.
He didn't understand yet.
But in Qingque's tear-filled eyes, he could already see it — that same crushing fear from before.
The fear of losing him again.
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A/n: Hey over on my patreon there are currently two for the time being exclusive books which are
Life Simulator: Starting in Genshin Impact!
Zenless Zone Zero: Loving Daily Life Starting in New Eridu
patreon.com/deadlygoober