I should've left that morning.
Everything was ready, my clothes folded, my books packed, even the new room number written neatly on a slip in my hand.
But that note… that small, quiet note lying on my desk - "Goodbye, Aveer. I hope I won't bother you anymore."
It wasn't ink. It was ache pressed into paper.
I kept staring at it, fingers trembling. The words weren't loud, but they screamed in my head. I tried to pick up my bag, but my body refused. My throat tightened, breath caught halfway.
Someone knocked. My new roommate maybe, a stranger with kind eyes - peeked in.
"Ready to go?" he asked, smiling.
I opened my mouth to say yes, but the sound that came out wasn't mine.
"Not yet," I whispered.
He nodded and left, and suddenly, I couldn't hear anything, not the corridor noise, not the rain outside. Just the silence. The same silence I'd been running from for four years.
And then i found myself sitting on my bed late night.
I heard it.
A song.
That voice. That familiar, trembling voice.
Aarav.
He was singing that song - the one from the terrace in my village, the one that carried the sound of childhood promises and stars that never judged us.
My chest cracked open. Everything I'd built, the walls, the indifference, the carefully rehearsed calm, started falling apart like dust. I tried to stand, to walk out, to keep my distance one last time… but my legs refused to move.
And then I couldn't control myself.
The tears came without warning, spilling hot and heavy down my face. I hadn't cried like that in years. Not since the day everything ended, not since his silence tore through me worse than any insult ever could.
Aarav stopped singing.
"Aveer?" His voice softened. "Hey… what's wrong?"
I shook my head, but my heart was louder this time.
"Why didn't you believe me, Aarav?" The words came out raw, strangled. "Why didn't you shout at me if you thought I was wrong? Why did you stay silent? You know what that silence did to me?"
My voice broke mid-sentence, but the flood wouldn't stop.
"I waited for you. I waited for you to say something, anything. I was ready for punishment if you thought I was guilty, you chose silence, you just walked away. You left me there alone!
Why? Why, Aarav? Why!"
The sobs ripped out of me. My body was shaking uncontrollably now.
Years of anger, pain, guilt, everything I'd buried, came crashing out all at once.
Aarav didn't know what to do. His face twisted in guilt, confusion, heartbreak. Then, without hesitation, he reached for me , arms wrapping around my trembling shoulders, pulling me in like I was something fragile.
"Hey… stop," he whispered, his voice breaking too. "Please stop crying. I'm sorry, Aveer. I don't know what really happened that day between you and Vishesh. I just know what he told me. But I never wanted to hurt you. I swear."
I pressed my face against his shoulder, unable to breathe through the tears. He held me tighter. The sound of our breathing filled the dark room, uneven, desperate, too human to hide anymore.
Minutes passed. Maybe hours. Neither of us moved.
Finally, Aarav spoke again, quietly, almost like a confession.
"I don't know about the past," he said. "All I know is I can't live with the thought of you leaving again. I can't. I don't even understand why… but I can't."
I looked up, eyes wet, voice trembling.
"What do you mean you can't, Aarav? You think you're the only one breaking? You think I didn't try to leave? I couldn't. I just couldn't."
Our eyes met, all the distance between us shrinking into one unbearable silence. It was all there: the pain, the love they never dared to name, the years they lost to pride and misunderstanding.
It was evident that they had unsaid feelings for each other which was finally on their lips.
Aarav was drowning in guilt he couldn't quite name. The distance he had created between himself and Aveer was now tearing him apart. Without another word, he pulled Aveer into a tight embrace. The moment Aveer began to sob - like a child in pain - Aarav's heart broke. He had never seen him cry before.
It was as if the pain Aveer had been carrying for four long years had finally burst free. Aarav held him close, speechless, his own throat heavy with emotion. He didn't know what to say, perhaps there were no words left to say. All he could do was wipe away Aveer's tears and hold him tighter, as if to protect him from the storm within.
Neither of them asked questions. They didn't need to. The years of guilt, compassion, and unspoken love were now laid bare before them. Their emotions overflowed; Aarav began to cry too, trying to quiet Aveer so he wouldn't make himself sick from sobbing. But even Aarav had lost control - of his body, his heart, his pain.
"Aveer," he whispered shakily, "I don't know what the past was, or why I did what I did… but I can't live with the thought of losing you anymore. It's killing me."
The truth hung in the air between them- heavy, trembling, undeniable. There were feelings they had never voiced, but that now shimmered between their lips, fragile and real.
Aarav leaned in. For a moment, Aveer froze - confused, hesitant. He tried to push Aarav away, but he couldn't. He just couldn't. His heart wouldn't let him. Aarav's lips met his, soft and trembling with years of unspoken longing.
Realizing what he had done, Aarav pulled back abruptly, shame flickering across his face. But before he could turn away, Aveer caught him by the neck and drew him back in, his own breath breaking with need. This time, there was no hesitation. Their lips met again - hungry, desperate, alive. Every ounce of pain, love, and forgiveness poured into that one kiss.
For a heartbeat, time itself seemed to pause between them. The room was quiet except for the sound of their unsteady breathing. Aarav could feel Aveer's breath brush against his lips -
Hesitant at first, then desperate, as though the years apart had left them starved for this one touch. Aveer's breath caught in his throat; his fingers clutched at Aarav's shirt, feeling the wild rhythm of the heartbeat beneath it.
Their kiss deepened, growing fierce with emotion. Every breath they shared seemed to draw the past out of them ,the guilt, the silence, the pain, until there was nothing left but the raw pulse of now. Aarav's hand came up to cup Aveer's face, his thumb trembling against his cheek as their lips moved together again, again, until breathing itself felt like an afterthought.
They parted only for air, foreheads pressed together, breath mingling, shaky, uneven, alive. Aveer's heart thudded so close that Aarav could feel its rhythm against his chest, a steady echo of his own.
In that closeness, everything else disappeared. The years of distance, the mistakes, the unspoken words, all were drowned in the sound of shared breathing and the quiet truth of two hearts finally finding the same rhythm. For that moment, the world was gone.
There was only them, breathing, trembling, holding on, as if love itself was the only thing keeping them from falling apart.
They didn't care about the past anymore. Nothing mattered - only this moment, only each other. Aarav's lips clung to Aveer's, and Aveer held him close as if afraid he might disappear again.
When the storm inside finally quieted, exhaustion took over.
Neither of us spoke. Neither tried to explain what just happened. We just sat there - side by side, tears drying slowly, hearts still racing but lighter somehow.
At some point, we must've fallen asleep.
I remember the warmth - his head against my shoulder, my breath finally steady after what felt like years of suffocating.
Outside, the rain hit harder. Inside, it was silent, but not the kind that hurt anymore.
This silence was different. It was full.
For the first time in years, I didn't wake up afraid.
Sometimes you don't break down because you're weak.
You break because you've been strong for too long.
Morning*
The sunlight had crept in quietly, brushing against my eyelids like it wanted to wake me up gently. I shifted a little, and that's when I felt it, the faint, steady weight against my shoulder.
Aarav.
His head was resting right there, his breath slow, warm, brushing against my neck. For a moment, I forgot to breathe.
My first instinct should've been to move him away. To shove him off and remind myself that this, whatever this strange comfort was, shouldn't exist between us. But I didn't move. I just watched him sleep.
He looked... different. No smirk, no teasing grin, no arrogance. Just peaceful. The curve of his lips softened, his hair falling clumsily over his forehead. He looked almost human, maybe even beautiful and the thought itself irritated me.
I turned away quickly, whispering to myself, "Don't be stupid, Aveer."
Still, I smiled. Just a little.
I slipped out of bed, washed my face, and for reasons I can't explain, decided to bring breakfast. Maybe it was guilt. Maybe habit. Or maybe, deep down, I just wanted to see him smile again, but no, that was ridiculous.
When I came back with tea and parathas, he was in the washroom brushing his teeth, humming some random song like he owned the place.
"Breakfast," I said, placing everything on the table.
He peeked out instantly, foam still in his mouth. "Wait, what? You brought breakfast?"
His tone made me frown. "Why? Can't I?"
He grinned mischievously, stepping halfway out of the washroom. "You sure you're Aveer and not some kind-hearted alien who took his place overnight?"
I rolled my eyes. "What's wrong with you? Why are you looking at me like that?"
He leaned closer, his grin widening. "Admit it, you care for me."
I crossed my arms. "Who'd care for a dumbo like you?"
"You," he said, his voice full of teasing certainty.
Before I could even blink, Aarav leaned forward and pressed a quick, wet kiss on my cheek. The minty smell of toothpaste hit me before the shock did.
My eyes widened. "You absolute idiot!" I shouted, wiping my face.
Aarav laughed so hard he had to hold the doorframe for support. "You should've seen your face! I swear it's the highlight of my day!"
"Don't mess with me," I warned, trying to sound furious but failing miserably.
He smirked, brushing past me with his towel. "I'll mess with you forever."
I turned away to hide my face, but the smile betrayed me before I could stop it.
"Moron," I muttered under my breath, though my heart didn't mean it.
They didn't know what this new feeling was, or if it had a name but for now, it was enough.
The mess of emotions, the half-healed wounds, the unspoken apologies, everything seemed to blur under the softness of that morning light.
The morning rush outside the PG was louder than usual , the sound of rickshaw horns, chatter, rainwater dripping from half-broken pipes. I didn't want to walk today; my head was already too noisy from everything unsaid.
And then, like fate's cruel joke, Aarav stepped out at the same time.
We both stared for a second, awkward, silent, then looked away in perfect coordination.
"The same route," he muttered finally, adjusting his bag.
"Unfortunately," I said, trying not to sound nervous.
A shared auto stopped in front of us. Aarav gestured for me to go first. I wanted to refuse, to walk away, to not sit next to him , but there was no space elsewhere. So, I climbed in, and he followed.
And just like that, we were too close again.
The auto was small, cramped. My shoulder brushed against his, and it was impossible not to feel the warmth through his shirt. Every time the driver hit a bump, our arms touched again.
No one spoke.
I could hear him breathing. Calm, steady, like he was pretending this wasn't uncomfortable.
My heart was drumming too fast, and the worst part was, I knew he could probably hear it.
I wanted to look at him once. Just once. But I didn't. Last night was still hanging between us like a secret neither of us had the courage to unfold.
When the auto stopped in front of my coaching, I almost jumped out , more from relief than destination.
"Here," I said quickly, paying my share of the fare.
He looked up for a second, and our eyes met.
It wasn't anger this time. It wasn't even awkwardness. It was something else, something softer that neither of us was ready to name.
Before I could think of what to say, I heard a familiar voice behind me.
"Aveer!"
It was Shivi - cheerful as always, umbrella in hand. She smiled when she saw us. "Heading to coaching?"
"Yeah," I said, forcing a small smile. "You're late again."
But I knew it was. For both of us
She laughed and slipped into step beside me.
I turned once more, just for a second . Aarav was still watching from the auto. His expression was unreadable, a strange mix of calm and something I didn't understand.
I thought of saying something, a goodbye, or maybe a small explanation that wasn't really needed.
But what was there to explain?
So, I let it go.
The driver called out, and the auto rattled forward. I didn't look back again.
The road blurred behind them. Aarav sat in silence.
Maybe it was the silence Aveer left behind.
Maybe it was the strange ache that came with realizing he wanted him to stay a little longer.
But feelings like that didn't have names, not yet.
So he leaned back and told himself it didn't matter.
Later that evening, Aveer's phone buzzed with a message from Shivi:
Coffee at 6? I found a new place near the institute. You're coming, right?
He typed back quickly ; Sure. I'll be there.
And then, almost on instinct, he texted Aarav:
Don't keep a plate for me in the mess tonight. I'll eat outside.
He didn't think much of it. But somewhere across the city, in a crowded canteen full of chatter, Aarav stared at that message longer than he should have.
He didn't reply. He just locked his phone, exhaled, and felt something small and sharp twist inside his chest.
It wasn't jealousy - at least that's what he told himself.
It was just… strange.
The kind of strange you feel when someone who used to annoy you now affects you in ways you can't explain.
At Cafe*
Aveer tried to focus on the cup in front of him, but his mind was somewhere else or maybe with someone else.
"You're really bad at pretending you're listening," Shivi teased, stirring her coffee.
He blinked. "What?"
She chuckled, resting her chin on her hand. "You do that thing again, staring at your cup like it'll give you answers. I was asking what kind of music you like."
"Oh," he said softly. "Old songs mostly."
"Of course," she grinned. "You look like someone who'd listen to heartbreak songs and overthink every lyric."
Aveer smiled faintly, trying not to show how close to the truth she was.
Shivi leaned forward a little. "You know, you're hard to read. Sometimes you look like you hate talking, and sometimes like you're holding a thousand things back. Which one's real?"
"I don't know," Aveer admitted after a pause. "Maybe both."
Shivi reached out, touching his hand lightly. "You've got those quiet eyes, Aveer. I don't know why, but they look sad, like you're always carrying someone else's shadow."
He froze for a moment, unsure whether to pull back or stay still. His throat went dry, his body tense.
He didn't know if he wanted to move closer or walk away.
So he just smiled politely and said nothing.
It was somehow awkward for him.
Meanwhile, at the PG
Aarav sat on Arsh's bed, trying to pay attention to whatever Aman was saying about tomorrow's practical. His notebook was open, but his mind wasn't.
Every time Arsh laughed, every time Aman asked a question, a thought slipped in, uninvited.
He's with her right now.
Probably laughing the way he never does here.
Probably happy.
He clicked his pen repeatedly, jaw tightening.
"Dude, are you even listening?" Arsh finally said, snapping his fingers.
"Huh? Yeah, yeah, just tired," Aarav replied, forcing a small smile.
"You've been weird lately," Aman said, raising a brow. "You look like you lost a fight with your thoughts."
"Shut up," Aarav muttered.
Arsh smirked. "Or maybe you're jealous that your roomie found someone better to hang out with."
Aarav glared at him. "What nonsense.."
Before Arsh could tease more, a knock came on the door.
Aveer stood there, looking a little hesitant.
Arsh and Aman exchanged a quick look before stepping aside.
Aveer's voice was calm but distant. "I was just looking for Aarav."
Aarav stood up, irritation flickering in his eyes. "Why? I'm not your husband, Aveer. I don't have to stick around you all the time."
The words were sharp, thrown before he could stop them.
Aveer's face changed - not angry, but hurt.
He opened his mouth, then closed it again, finally saying quietly, "You're right. You're not my husband, nor anything close to that. Don't ever try to be."
He turned to leave, but Aarav's voice stopped him. "Yeah, just go to your precious Shivi. I'm sure she's waiting for you."
Aveer turned around, eyes narrowing. "At least she doesn't make everything a mess. She doesn't confuse me every time she opens her mouth."
"Oh, really?" Aarav said bitterly. "Then go. Date her, marry her, do whatever you want. I'll find the next girl next door too. Problem solved."
"Perfect," Aveer replied coldly, though his heart ached at every word. "Maybe you should start tonight."
Aarav's jaw clenched. "Maybe I will."
The air was thick with all the things they didn't mean but said anyway.
Aveer stormed out of the room, his footsteps echoing down the corridor.
He didn't know why those words hurt so much.
Later that night*
The PG was quiet. The storm that had been waiting outside for hours finally broke loose, thunder rolling far away.
Aarav sat on his bed, staring at the wall. The guilt crept in slowly, like rain seeping under a closed window.
He thought about the look on Aveer's face when he said those words.
He hadn't meant to hurt him but that's all he ever seemed to do.
Maybe he was right. Maybe they were better apart.
But then why did the thought of that feel so wrong?
On the other side of the room, Aveer lay awake, facing the wall, pretending to be asleep.
The rain outside sounded exactly like the noise inside his head - endless, restless, heavy.
He didn't know what Aarav was thinking.
He didn't even know what he was thinking.
All he knew was that every time he tried to distance himself, his heart found new ways to betray him.
And in the middle of that dark, silent room, two boys lay awake ;
both hurting for the same reason,
and both too stubborn to admit it.
To be continued...