A ruin where footsteps have ceased. The streets are filled with debris from shattered buildings, and with every inhale, air mixed with dust and soil penetrates the lungs. It's murky. Like a thick wad of garbage stuck in the esophagus and trachea. But even that was lighter than the fog clouding the mind.
*Hoo*, Kenji exhaled a breath into the air. Black smoke rose toward the sky before scattering. He stared expressionlessly at the remnants of the fear, then closed his eyes and assumed a stance. Fist at his side, left foot back, gaze straight ahead.
And a single point.
*KWA-BOOOOM!*
With a tremendous roar, the building in front of Kenji collapsed. A gust of wind swept through along with dust. Kenji frowned and shook off the fear residue clinging to his fist. After the dust settled, the scenery visible was nothing but rubble too shameful to even call a building anymore.
At that sight, Kenji let out a snorting laugh.
Because it was fun? No, because it was idiotic.
The act he's doing now has no meaning. He didn't channel anything into his fist, nor did he empty his mind seeking enlightenment. It's just venting. Feeling like he'd go insane if he didn't break something visible, he's swinging his fist meaninglessly.
Perhaps because he recklessly unleashed it without control, his insides were jolted by the recoil, but Kenji paid no mind. Instead, he looked up at the hazy sky and plopped down on the spot. His head hurt. Surely it wasn't just from unleashing fear without a plan.
'...Damn it.'
He recalled Mika's face from their reunion after so long. Already two days had passed, but that tear-stained face refused to be forgotten, digging its roots deep into one side of his mind. Thanks to that, he couldn't erase it even if he wanted to, and it popped up even when he didn't want to remember.
"...Fuck."
Kenji spat out a curse and splashed water on his face. Beyond his faintly visible field of view, the hands covering his face were trembling. Fear, anger, hatred, resentment, guilt, and remorse—emotions all mixed together were impossible to define anymore. He bit his lip and hung his head.
If there is a God.
At the very least, those children should have been happy. What sin did they commit to suffer? One sinner was enough, and the resulting sin didn't need to be shared; bearing it alone should have sufficed. There's absolutely no reason for them to suffer together.
But then.
"..."
When he closes his eyes, Mika's face appears. When he opens them, his pitifully trembling hands are visible. Either way was hard to face directly.
Would gouging his eyes out make it better? Kenji let out a weak laugh, *huh*, and bit his lip hard. Blood burst from his torn lower lip. Blood droplets fell along his jawline. *Plip, plop*, only such sounds echoed through the space.
The ashen sky sang silence. Sunlight was blocked by clouds, unable to reach the ground, and with not a single breeze blowing, it painted the world in stillness. It was a loneliness he had grown accustomed to by now. Kenji contorted his expression and removed the hands covering his face.
At the same time. In the corner of his vision, a mint-haired girl was making an uneasy expression, fidgeting restlessly. At the unexpected face that suddenly appeared, Kenji slightly frowned and called her name.
"...Hiyori?"
"Ah, um...! Ah, hello... Hehe."
Hiyori laughed like that and awkwardly moved a little closer to Kenji.
"...Why did you come suddenly? Training is canceled today."
"W-well... The leader told me to come check on you..."
"Saori?"
"Yes, yes...! W-was I a bother? You seemed to be worrying about something.... Gasp! Could it be that's it?! I'm sorry! I'll disappear!"
"...I don't know what you imagined, but that's probably not it."
Kenji smiled bitterly and gestured toward Hiyori. It meant to come closer. Hiyori flinched for a moment, then cautiously approached and carefully sat beside him. Then, *whoosh*, her unique hyacinth scent filled his nasal passages. Kenji gazed intently at Hiyori's profile for a moment, then turned his head with a bitter smile.
Saori told her to come check. To the point she'd say such a thing herself, his condition must have looked serious to others. Sitting here feeling sorry for himself, it was only natural. Kenji sneered slightly and spat out the blood that had entered his mouth. *Ptui.*
"Did you read the magazine well?"
Kenji asked with a smile. Hiyori, who had been fidgeting, nodded her head and answered.
"Yes, yes. Maybe because it was the latest issue, the design was different from the ones I had before, but still, it was good..."
"If you need anything in the future, tell me. Whenever I go out, I'll try to buy it for you."
"R-really?! Th-then... while you're shopping, could you buy some ice cream for me too?"
Hiyori spat out with an awkward laugh. Kenji stared at her for a moment, then chuckled and patted her head.
"I'll buy enough to make you sick from eating."
"Wow, wow! Buy a lot of vanilla flavor, please!"
"Sure, sure."
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Kenji smiled faintly and rubbed the corner of his mouth. The flowing blood stained the back of his hand red. Hiyori flinched, but Kenji roughly wiped the back of his hand on his clothes, then let out a long breath toward the sky.
"U, um... Teacher."
Then, Hiyori suddenly called Kenji. She calls me Teacher too, like Saori. Kenji chuckled and looked back at Hiyori.
"Hmm?"
"Um... If, if it's okay... would you like to use... a lap?"
"...?"
A puzzled light filled Kenji's eyes. Suddenly saying to use a lap, what kind of nonsense is that? At the sentence with all context cut off, Kenji blinked and tilted his head. Hiyori frantically flailed both hands before his misunderstanding deepened.
"No, I mean! You look tired! I thought maybe getting some shut-eye would help..."
"...So, you're telling me to lean on your lap and sleep?"
"Yes!"
"...Why?"
"B-because it said in a magazine that it's better that way...?"
"..."
Kenji let out a short, hollow laugh, then cleared his throat as if embarrassed. *Ahem.*
Perhaps because he heard unnecessary words, his gaze kept drifting toward Hiyori's pure white thighs. Certainly, lying against them would probably be comfortable. The room he stayed in at Arius was a stone floor without even a bed, and his pillow was a tissue, so lying there would probably make him feel comfortable for the first time in a while.
...Thinking that, a very small, really tiny bit of desire welled up. It was an emotion closer to sleep-desire than sexual desire. Honestly, since coming to Arius, he hadn't had proper sleep. Moreover, just a few days ago, because of the unintended reunion, he stayed up all night. Kenji couldn't help but desperately need sleep right now.
"...Is it really okay?"
Kenji asked with a look containing a hint of apology and desire. At that gaze, Hiyori nodded her head.
"Yes, yes! Would you like to lie down?"
"...Then, just for a bit. I'll lie down for about 10 minutes."
"Got it!"
Hiyori spat that out, then leaned her upper body back slightly so Kenji could lie down. Kenji, feeling awkward for no reason, gave a fake cough and lay down, resting his head on Hiyori's thighs. As expected, her legs were as plush as any decent pillow. He unconsciously let out a sigh.
"I-Is it uncomfortable?"
"Hmm... It's nice."
"Ehehe... I'm just following what I read in a magazine. I really wanted to try it once!"
"That's... really... fortunate..."
Kenji couldn't finish his last sentence. Because his spirit, pushed to its limit, his exhausted body, and the onslaught of sleep-demons all harmonized in a triple beat, instantly snuffing out his consciousness. His breathing became even, and his frowning face relaxed comfortably.
"...Ehehe."
Hiyori laughed softly and stroked Kenji's hair. Then, she carefully caressed his eyelids.
"Sleep well."
*
Just as the emotion felt one second ago and the emotion felt one second later can differ, human emotions were noisy. That was the case now. A tangled mass of emotions mixed together like a ball of yarn. Defining it precisely might be possible, but she was too embarrassed to bother defining it.
Hiyori listened to the sound of her own pounding heartbeat and looked down at Kenji's face resting on her lap.
Honestly, the first meeting isn't well remembered. Probably because of the hunger that had driven her to the limit. The memories from that time are only of holding Saori's hand and going up to the Trinity autonomous district and shoving a piece of bread teeming with maggots and mold into her mouth.
That's probably why she didn't recognize him during their second meeting. A faint memory remained, but she couldn't recall his exact face. Honestly, she wasn't embarrassed. Whatever, it's a natural reaction to scream when a stranger suddenly appears!
...Still, she felt sorry. Even though he was someone who helped them like that, she was anxious whether she had been rude. But he didn't seem to hold onto the discourtesy from that time. If he had, he wouldn't be able to sleep with such a peaceful expression now. Hiyori smiled faintly and pinched Kenji's cheek.
It didn't feel that good to touch, so she let go quickly.
The third meeting happened right after the second. Along with shocking news, he, who became the new executive in charge, showed a different appearance from the executives met so far. A daily life composed of laughter, kindness, and tolerance instead of punches, kicks, insults, and criticism was bizarre and simultaneously frightening. Because an anxiety that such kindness might twist at any moment loomed.
But such anxiety quickly subsided. Just as giving money to someone without it easily gains favor, giving tasty food to the hungry was an act that lowered wariness. Hiyori was the party involved. On Kenji's first day as an executive, she still hasn't forgotten the taste of the crunchy carrot sticks and vegetable porridge. Instead, she forgot her wariness toward Kenji. In Hiyori's heart, Kenji instantly rose in status to a good person.
Of course, if he had acted kindly only on the first day and been harsh on other days, her evaluation of him would have plummeted. But he consistently showed the same appearance. He was a bit scary during training, but normally, he laughed well and even played pranks.
Is there any reason to dislike such a person?
Hiyori's gaze had been following Kenji for some time now, and when she saw him during training, she often stared blankly through her scope.
It was strange, but not an unpleasant feeling.
Suddenly, a word she read in a magazine during childhood came to mind. It was... 'quick to fall in love', I think. It was written in a pretty old magazine, so I don't know if it's used nowadays, but anyway, it was such a word. The meaning was a person who falls in love quickly, and at first, she wondered if such people existed. But who would have known that person would be herself?
But so what if I'm quick to fall? Teacher isn't a bad person! There's no reason to dislike him, but reasons to like him are overflowing. Hiyori thought so and spilled a foolish smile.
"Ehehe."
She fiddled with various parts of Kenji's face. Stroking his eyelids, touching his nose, pinching his earlobes between her thumb and index finger and kneading them. And finally, the lips. Hiyori drooled and brushed his lips with her thumb. Then she rubbed her own lips frantically with that finger.
An indirect kiss! Oh my, such skinship already! Isn't this too fast, even for being quick? Her head thought so, but her body followed desire. Hiyori's mouth corners trembled as she moved her hand as if trying to memorize the shape of Kenji's lips.
Then, Kenji's face slightly frowned. Hiyori jumped in surprise and froze her body like ice. But seeing that Kenji didn't wake up, she smiled again. She continued like that for a while, then blushed and pouted her lips like a duck.
"Ki, ki-ki, kishu..."
"What are you doing?"
"Eek!"
At the voice that suddenly reached her, Hiyori screamed and waved her arms wildly. Watching that scene, the owner of the voice, Atsuko, held a small smile.
"What were you trying to do?"
"Nothing at all! M-more importantly, why did you come suddenly?!"
"Saori told me to check because you were gone too long. But... did I interrupt?"
"Yes!"
It was an immediate answer. Atsuko smiled slightly and approached the two.
"He's sleeping well. Like a baby."
"...Ugh. If only Princess hadn't come... Life is truly suffering..."
"Sorry for interrupting. But I think we should go soon. It's almost dinner time, right?"
"Huh, is it that late already?"
"Yes. Azusa is in charge of cooking today."
"...She won't bring something with vinegar sprinkled on combat rations and call it cooking again, will she?"
Hiyori said in a gloomy voice.
It was a sight hard to see before. Complaining about food? Just a month ago, she would have devoured it hungrily, saying even Azusa's cooking was good.
Well, it probably means her quality of life has improved enough for her to say such things. And all of that is thanks to this sleepy prince. Atsuko giggled and poked Kenji's cheek with her finger.
"Let's wake Teacher too. The prince should go with the princess."
"Yes..."
Hiyori spat out in a voice dripping with regret.
Just as she was about to get up. A sudden sense of incongruity made her look back at Atsuko.
"...U, um, Princess."
"Hmm?"
At Hiyori's call, Atsuko tilted her head. That gesture, the finger still poking Kenji's cheek. And the earlier statement.
"Wh-what did you mean by what you said earlier?"
"Which one?"
"'Th-the prince should go with the princess'... D-does it have some meaning...?"
Hiyori trailed off as if anxious. Atsuko, who had been silently staring at her, grinned and answered.
"It does"
"H-huh?"
"Meaning. It has one."
Atsuko said only that much and tapped Kenji's shoulder to wake him. But Hiyori couldn't react at all. She just stood there with her mouth agape, staring blankly at Atsuko.
While thinking.
Ah.
This is terrible!