I had been in the village for less than an hour, and I'd already caused three minor disasters, two fainting incidents, one structural loss of a public well, and an emotional breakdown in Yue.
A good start, in my opinion.
To further immerse myself in "mortal life," I decided, I should learn the most common human work.
Yue followed behind me nervously, her long white hair swaying like a distressed cloud. "Master, please… be careful. Mortals are fragile. Very, very fragile."
"I know," I replied. "That's why I'm practicing. Today, I will complete just one normal human task without destroying anything."
Yue made a face like she didn't believe that was physically possible.
When I stepped back into the village square, the villagers attempted to look busy but their trembling hands and widened eyes betrayed them.
A baker approached first, sweating. "S-sir… uh… Lin… Xuan… perhaps you would like to help knead dough?"
A blacksmith ran up immediately after. "NO! No kneading! He might crush the entire table help me at the forge instead!"
A farmer pushed past both. "Forge?! Are you mad?! He'll melt the whole village! Sir, y-you can help me water the crops! Very safe! Very harmless!"
I turned to Yue. "They seem eager for my assistance."
"They're trying to keep you somewhere they can watch you!" she hissed. "Preferably somewhere you can't blow up."
"I don't explode things that often," I muttered.
Her stare said otherwise.
A group of farmers escorted me to their field as if leading a dragon into a glass shop.
One handed me a wooden bucket. "Please… just pour. Gently. Very gently."
I inspected the bucket. It was flimsy. Mortals truly lived on the brink of disaster.
I dipped the bucket into the well and poured it over the soil.
A single drop fell.
The rest of the water evaporated instantly from the heat of my aura.
The farmers stared.
I tried again. More carefully. Much slower.
One drop.
Evaporated again.
Finally, I crouched, touched the soil with a fingertip, and channeled the smallest amount of divine energy I could muster.
The entire field burst into vibrant green life, plants sprouting, growing, blooming, and completing an entire harvest cycle in one second.
The farmers collapsed to their knees. "A-a miracle!"
Yue's face turned pale. "MASTER! THEY ONLY NEEDED WATER!"
I dusted my hands. "Done. Efficient."
Next, the blacksmith insisted I try something in his forge.
"Here! Just hold this metal piece steady while I hammer it."
Simple enough.
He raised the hammer… swung… and
CLANG.
The hammer shattered.
The metal bar remained unbothered.
"My hammer!" he shrieked.
"I did nothing," I said calmly. "It broke on its own."
"I didn't even move" he cried. "That was my best hammer!"
Yue sighed. "Master… maybe don't touch anything."
...
The baker was desperate. "Just knead it lightly! Please! My business depends on this!"
I placed a single finger on the dough.
One gentle press.
The dough shot across the room like a fired cannonball, splattering against the ceiling and sticking there like a monstrous, expanding bread parasite.
A child screamed.
The baker screamed louder.
Yue covered her face. "Why… why are we like this, Master?"
Eventually, all the villagers gathered in the square. An emergency meeting.
Someone whispered, "If he tries to sweep the floor, the entire house might collapse!"
Another said, "If he cooks, we'll lose the kitchen!"
A old man said, "If he breathes, something might explode!"
I cleared my throat, and all went silent.
"I see," I said. "You do not want me to work?"
They shook their heads so hard I feared they'd snap their own necks.
Yue stepped forward, bowing apologetically. "My master is… still adjusting. Please be patient."
"Patient?" cried the blacksmith. "My hammer has trauma!"
The baker raised a trembling hand. "My ceiling has dough!"
The farmer sobbed. "My crops reached enlightenment!"
I nodded, accepting their complaints with grace. "Very well. I shall refrain from working."
The villagers all collapsed with relief.
As I prepared to leave, the small girl from earlier approached again, tugging on my sleeve.
"Sir Lin… what do you truly seek?"
Her eyes were too innocent. Too honest.
I paused.
"Human Emotion…Because I have lived too long," I said. "So long that my human emotions have faded… gone quiet. I need to feel human again. In my life within the Immortal Realm, what you mortals call the Divine Realm my emotions were slowly consumed by my own power and existence. And instead of feeling anything… I was consumed by boredom itself."
"I want to understand something simple. Something…like excitement."
She tilted her head and smiled. "Then I'm rooting for you."
I stared at her.
Yue stared at her.
The villagers stared at her.
"…Huh," I said slowly. "Interesting."
The girl smiled proudly, as if she had just enlightened an immortal being.
Perhaps she had.
I stretched my arms. "Very well. If I cannot work… then perhaps I shall seek excitement instead of a boring life."
Yue blinked. "Master… that sounds… surprisingly reasonable."
"Yes," I agreed.
Then a house behind me quietly collapsed, probably from leftover divine pressure.
Yue screamed. The villagers wailed.
I sighed. "This may take longer than expected."
Still, for the first time in a long, long time…
I didn't mind.