Xu Rang held me up, his eyes filled with worry. "Number Two, are you okay?"
I smiled and shook my head. "I'm fine. I'm too young and acted rashly. Big Brother was just disciplining me, teaching me how things should be done!"
Xu Rang looked at my high, swollen cheek, his face full of indignation.
"Motherfucker, it was clearly that bastard Song Jiawen who started trouble. What right does Big Brother have to hit you? I'm going to ask Big Brother if he's scared of Xu Feilin."
After saying that, he charged toward the courtyard. I hurriedly grabbed him around the waist, and Yang Huzi pulled on his arm.
"Xu Rang, believe it or not, if you dare go in there and ask Big Brother a single thing today, Number Two is going to get handled tomorrow!"
That one sentence quieted both Xu Rang and me.
I was thinking that Chen Qiang already found me unpleasant; if Xu Rang went in and said a few words, he'd despise me even more.
But surely it hadn't reached the point where if Xu Rang spoke up today, Chen Qiang would handle me tomorrow!
Xu Rang stood frozen in place. At that moment, Xu Dawei walked over, his injured arm in a sling.
He patted Xu Rang and me on the shoulders. "Aiyah, it's a bullshit little thing, stop thinking about it."
"Number Two, the car is parked at the alley entrance, and the guns are in the trunk. If you're really not happy about Song Jiawen, I'll go with you right now. Two shots to kill him."
"Then we'll go straight to Yangcheng. I don't believe his balls are bigger than the sky, or that he can find us once we're in Yangcheng."
Before I could speak, Yang Huzi's face had turned as ugly as it could get.
He let go of Xu Rang's hand and walked toward Chen Qiang's courtyard.
Just as he was about to enter the gate, he turned his head, staring at me with a gaze as cold as ice.
"Chu Lao Er, you need to know your place. Sometimes, if you put yourself in the wrong spot, the fall will kill you."
I had been slapped three times by Chen Qiang for no reason, so my resentment was already heavier than a ghost's.
Now, seeing Yang Huzi acting high and mighty, posturing to lecture me, I instantly flew into a rage.
I let go of Xu Rang's waist, closed the distance in three steps, and grabbed Yang Huzi by the collar.
I lifted him up, gritting my teeth. "Yang Huzi, I call you Brother Huzi usually, and now you really think you're a Big Brother?"
"What kind of prick do you think you are? It's one thing for Big Brother to discipline me, but now you want to lecture me too? Are you worthy?"
Yang Huzi's expression didn't change. He gently patted my hand.
"Number Two, let go."
I didn't let go. Instead, I gripped harder, lifting his feet off the ground.
"So what if I don't let go? Try lecturing me one more time."
Yang Huzi wasn't as tall as me, nor as strong, so he simply gave up struggling.
"Number Two, let's put aside whether I, Yang Huzi, am a Big Brother or not. But you definitely aren't the Big Brother."
"If you want to live past eighteen, behave yourself and stay steady. Don't let it get to the point where we can't even be brothers anymore."
Xu Rang squeezed forward then, mediating, "Aiyah, we're all brothers of the same sect. Why fall out like this over that prick outsider Song Jiawen?"
"Number Two, let go first. Brother Huzi has his reasons too."
I looked into Yang Huzi's eyes. It was strange; I didn't see fear or anger in them.
Instead, it was pity.
A look like he was feeling sorry for me.
My body shuddered, and my hand unconsciously released his collar.
Yang Huzi straightened his clothes and looked at me, Xu Rang, and Xu Dawei.
"Don't think I'm sticking green onions in a pig's nose—pretending to be an elephant."
"I am saving Chu Lao Er's life. Dawei, Xu Rang, if you really consider Chu Lao Er a brother, stay far away from him from now on."
Then, Yang Huzi stepped closer and whispered in my ear, "Number Two, this is the second time. I still won't tell Big Brother that Xu Rang and Dawei were ready to do whatever for you."
"But remember this: my brotherhood with you only goes this far. Behave yourself from now on, or I really will handle you."
I clenched my teeth tight, my brain turning into a confused paste. In the end, I still couldn't figure out why Chen Qiang and Yang Huzi had changed their tunes so fast.
They both had thoughts of handling me.
Where exactly had things gone wrong?
Yang Huzi walked into Chen Qiang's courtyard, leaving me, Xu Rang, and Xu Dawei behind.
The three of us looked at each other. None of us could figure out what mistake had been made to make Chen Qiang this furious.
No matter how good the relationship between Xu Feilin and Chen Qiang was, I hadn't actually done any permanent damage to Song Jiawen.
Xu Rang patted my shoulder. "Number Two, don't overthink it. Maybe things aren't going smoothly with the bus station business lately, so Big Brother has a fire in his heart."
Xu Dawei also hooked his arm around my shoulder. "I say the same. It'll be fine in a few days. Let's ignore all that for now. Come to my house; I'll have your sister-in-law stir-fry a few dishes, and we'll drink until we're happy."
Xu Dawei was almost thirty, with a wife and kid.
I wasn't in the mood to go home either. My house and Chen Qiang's house were only separated by a courtyard wall; my mother must have heard what happened over here.
Going back with a swollen face right now would just make her heart ache even more.
Feeling agitated, I nodded. But just as the three of us were about to go drink, Yang Huzi came out from inside.
"Dawei, Xu Rang, Big Brother is calling you inside."
Chen Qiang called for Xu Rang and Xu Dawei, but he didn't call for me.
With this, not only me, but even those two thick-nerves realized that Chen Qiang's attitude toward me was wrong.
Xu Rang stared at me fixedly. "Number Two, tell me the truth. Did you do something behind Big Brother's back?"
I smiled bitterly and spread my hands. "No, really no. I don't know anything."
Yang Huzi stood inside the courtyard gate, holding it open, waiting for the two of them.
Xu Rang looked at me, then at Chen Qiang's gate. Finally, he gritted his teeth. "Number Two, go wait for me at the slot machine parlor. I'll go in and see what Big Brother has to say."
I forced a smile and nodded. "Go ahead. It's fine. I was just going to go check on the fish farm anyway."
I turned and left, going the opposite direction from Chen Qiang's house.
It seemed that Heaven was already hinting at this moment that my path and the group led by this underworld Big Brother, Chen Qiang, were destined to diverge.
I straddled my motorcycle and sped like the wind to the fish farm. Lin Changzai, along with Changlin and the Chen brothers, had whipped up some food and were eating.
Seeing me arrive, Lin Changzai immediately dropped his chopsticks, ran up to me, and timidly called out, "Second Brother."
His face was full of guilt; he probably knew that I hadn't been able to celebrate New Year's Eve.
I was irritable inside, and seeing his cowardly look made me even angrier.
"Every day you say you want to follow me, want to follow me. But when I actually tell you to follow, when the knife is handed to you, you don't dare to strike. What use are you to me?"
"What happened to 'touching me means touching you first,' and 'if you don't fall, I won't die'? Cut the bullshit bragging from now on."
Lin Changzai buried his head at my scolding, missing my swollen cheek.
But Changlin saw it.
"Second Brother, what happened to your face? Did that bastard named Song hit you?"
I waved my hand. "Go eat your food. Why are little kids worrying about this stuff?"
The Chen brothers stood up and walked over to me. "Second Brother, we heard everything. That guy named Song is the brother-in-law of a Big Brother in the county seat. Is Brother Qiang not helping you?"
Changlin put down his bowl. He was the youngest, but his words gave me the biggest chills. "Big Brother? Big Brother my ass. Stab our way in twice and whoever deserves to die will die. Second Brother, give me the motorcycle. I'll go to the county seat tonight and stab him."
I walked over and slapped him on the head. "Enough, enough. Let me have some peace. Eat your food."
Seeing that I was genuinely getting angry, the three of them didn't dare to contradict me further. They all lowered their heads and started eating.
After all, they were just kids.
I couldn't be bothered to manage them anymore. I sat by the fish pond and lit a cigarette.
Just as the cigarette was lit, Lin Changzai came up to me with red eyes and extended his hand.
"Second Brother, give me the car keys. I'll go to the county seat tonight and kill that bastard Song Jiawen."
Looking at his eyes red from crying just pissed me off. I kicked him in the ass.
"Get the fuck over there and eat! Don't add to my troubles right now! When the guy was here, I told you to chop him and you didn't. Now that he's gone, you're here acting like a big bad wolf."
Lin Changzai wanted to say something more.
But I really wasn't in the mood to talk to him. "Lin Changzai, I'll tell you straight. In my heart, you're just a gutless coward without balls, the kind who doesn't dare to cut someone even when the knife is handed to you."
"But I don't blame you, and I don't despise you. Just consider it me owing you, alright? Don't annoy me right now."
"Roll over there and eat your food."
Lin Changzai stared at me blankly for a long while before walking over to eat without a word.
In my fit of anger, I never imagined that those casual words would stay in Lin Changzai's heart for the rest of his life.
Even though his life would be very short.
...
Late winter, 1999. Lin Changzai's last words before he died were: "Second Brother, you don't owe me anything, and I'm not a gutless coward!"
Oh, Lin Changzai. You never owed your Second Brother anything. It is this Second Brother, two years your junior, who owes you.
If there really is a next life, Second Brother will be an ox or a horse for you to pay you back. If one life isn't enough, then two. If two aren't enough, then life after life.