By the third day, Ren came to terms with an uncomfortable fact.
Sarcasm wasn't something he did anymore.
It was something he was.
He was currently kneeling in the outer courtyard, palms pressed to the cold stone, sweat dripping down his nose as Elder Zhou stalked between rows of disciples like a disappointed mountain.
"Hold," the elder barked.
Ren's arms trembled.
> Body Tempering Progress: 6%
Status: Actively regretting life choices
Ren's thoughts were calm, measured, and razor-sharp.
Ah yes, he mused, this must be the famous path to immortality. Step one: become a decorative statue. Step two: die slightly less.
Zhao Kun, kneeling two spots away, shot him a smug look. His posture was steady, his Qi circulating smoothly.
Ren glanced back and whispered, "Congrats. You're winning at kneeling. Truly inspirational."
Zhao Kun's concentration faltered for half a second.
> System Update:
Enemy Focus Disrupted
Psychological Damage: Minor but satisfying
Ren smiled faintly, immediately regretting it as his arms screamed in protest.
Elder Zhou stopped in front of him.
"Lin Fan."
Ren looked up. "Yes, Elder? If this is about my posture, I'd like to formally blame gravity."
A ripple of suppressed snickers spread through the disciples.
Elder Zhou's eyes narrowed—not in anger, but interest. "You speak too much for someone so weak."
Ren nodded seriously. "I agree. Unfortunately, silence has never improved my survival rate."
The elder studied him for a long moment, then snorted.
"Hmph. At least your spirit hasn't collapsed."
> System Notification:
Elder Zhou's Impression: Neutral → Observant
Ren blinked. Did I just earn respect for being annoying? Incredible.
When the punishment finally ended, Ren collapsed onto the ground like a discarded robe.
> Body Tempering Progress: 6% → 9%
Ren stared at the floating numbers. "So suffering is officially measurable now. Good to know."
As he staggered to his feet, a new panel appeared.
> Trait Unlocked:
Innate Sarcasm (Passive)
Effect:
• Increases mental resilience
• Slightly disrupts opponents' emotional balance
• High chance of irritating authority figures
Warning:
Cannot be disabled.
Ren read it twice.
Then laughed.
"Oh come on," he muttered. "I don't even get to toggle it off?"
> System Response:
Trait reflects host's core personality.
Removal not recommended.
Ren wiped sweat from his face. "Great. My soul comes with patch notes."
---
Later that evening, Ren was limping back toward his room when he noticed a familiar figure standing by the bamboo path.
Su Meilin.
She glanced at him, then at the way he walked.
"You're injured," she said.
Ren waved a hand dismissively. "Only emotionally."
She frowned. "Be serious."
"I am," Ren replied. "This is my serious walk."
She stared at him for a heartbeat—then sighed. "You should apply salve."
Ren nodded thoughtfully. "Ah yes. Healing. I'd forgotten that was an option."
She handed him a small jade vial.
"For your arms," she said. "Don't misunderstand."
Ren accepted it carefully. "Of course not. This is clearly a random act of medicinal generosity."
> System Update:
Target: Su Meilin
Favorability: 18% → 22%
Reason: Gratitude without impropriety + shared moment
Ren paused.
"Wait," he said. "Twenty-two percent? That's a big jump."
> System Clarification:
Kindness delivered during vulnerability has increased impact.
Ren looked at Su Meilin, who was already turning away.
"Hey," he called after her.
She paused.
"Thanks," he said, then added, "I promise not to ruin this moment with sarcasm."
She snorted despite herself.
> Micro-Reaction Detected
Favorability: 22% → 23%
Ren watched her leave, stunned.
"…So you're telling me," he whispered to the system, "that sarcasm is a debuff and a buff?"
> System Response:
Correct.
Host is paradoxical.
Ren smiled tiredly as he headed inside.
Weak body.
Low cultivation.
Mounting debts.
Enemies watching closely.
But now he had something Lin Fan never did.
A spine.
A mouth.
And a personality sharp enough to cut through scorn.
"Alright," Ren said to the empty room, applying the salve. "Let's see how far pure attitude can take me before the universe slaps me again."
Somewhere above the Azure Blossom Sect, fate paused…
then quietly rewrote a few expectations.