The hum of my burgeoning electronics business was growing louder, but the family drumbeat was about to reach a crescendo. My Total Recall was flashing a red light: Tonight was the night Mitchell and Cam were bringing the whole clan together to reveal their "new addition."
I was sitting in my "garage-office," finishing a delicate solder on a senior's logic board, when the front door chime echoed through the house.
[INTERVIEW - MASON]Mason is cleaning his tools with a microfiber cloth.Mason: "In the show, this is the pilot. The big reveal of Lily. The 'Circle of Life' moment. It's the spark that forces everyone back into each other's lives. But for me, it's also a networking opportunity. If I'm going to start investing properly, I need to look less like a 'miracle jock' and more like a 'legacy cornerstone.' First step: secure the family's trust. Second step: capitalize on the chaos."
The Dunphys arrived first. Phil was wearing a vest that looked far too adventurous for a Sunday evening, and Claire was already twitching from the effort of not correcting Haley's makeup.
"Mason! Buddy!" Phil called out, wandering into the garage. He peered at my workbench. "Whoa, look at this. It's like CSI: Pasadena. You got the flux, the iron... you know, I once tried to fix our toaster. Turns out, it wasn't broken, it just wasn't plugged in. But the explosion was still very scientific."
"Hey, Phil," I said, standing up. My Peak Athlete Physique meant I moved with a fluid grace that always seemed to startle him. "Ready for the big secret?"
"Big secret? Oh, right! Mitchell's 'surprise.' I bet it's a vintage wine club. Or a very dramatic new scarf."
We moved into the living room. Jay was already nursing a Scotch, looking like a man awaiting a dental procedure. Gloria was glowing, sensing the shift in the family's energy. Then, Mitchell and Cam entered.
Cam was vibrating with theatrical tension. He had a CD player tucked under one arm and was wearing a silk kimono that draped over him like a colorful tent.
"Everyone, please! If you could all gather around the center of the room," Cam announced, his voice reaching a pitch that only dogs and Gloria could hear.
"What is this, a seance?" Jay grumbled, but he stood up. "And why are you wearing a robe, Cam? Did we interrupt your bath?"
"It's a kimono, Jay," Mitchell whispered, his face already turning a shade of mortified pink. "It's about... culture. And ceremony."
"I have a ceremony for you," Claire muttered, leaning toward Phil. "It's called 'Please don't let this be a performance piece.' Last time Cam did a 'ceremony,' we had to watch him mime the history of the tractor for forty-five minutes."
"I enjoyed the tractor, Claire," Phil whispered back. "The engine failure sequence was very visceral."
[INTERVIEW - CLAIRE]Claire stares at the camera with wide, desperate eyes.Claire: "I just wanted a normal Sunday. A little wine, a little gossip, maybe judging my brother's shoes. But then Cam walks in looking like he's about to serve tea in Kyoto, and suddenly I'm the 'difficult' one because I don't want to hear a flute solo."
"We have some news," Mitchell began, his voice wavering. "For the last year, we've been... well, we've been through a process. And we'd like you to meet someone."
Cam hit the 'Play' button on the CD player. The opening chant of The Lion King's 'Circle of Life' blasted through the speakers. With a flourish that would have made Broadway proud, Cam hoisted a small, wrapped bundle into the air.
The room froze.
"Is that... is that a cat?" Luke asked, squinting. "Did you guys get a hairless cat?"
"It's a baby, Luke!" Alex hissed, though she looked just as confused by the presentation.
"This is Lily," Mitchell whispered, finally taking her from Cam as the music faded.
The reaction was immediate. Gloria screamed with delight, "Ay, una muñequita!" But Jay blinked, the Scotch suspended halfway to his mouth.
"So... you got a kid," Jay said, his voice flat. "An Asian kid. Did we... do we have to call someone? Is there a return policy if it doesn't work out?"
"Dad!" Mitchell yelled. "She's not a toaster!"
"I'm just saying!" Jay defended, throwing his hands up. "One minute you're talking about a new rug, the next you're Rafiki-ing a human being in my living room. Give a guy a heads-up!"
The air in the room curdled. Mitchell's face fell, the joy of the moment being sucked out by Jay's classic discomfort. I stepped forward. I didn't wait for the awkward silence to deepen. I walked right up to Mitchell and looked down at the tiny, sleeping face of Lily.
"She's perfect, Mitchell," I said. My voice was deep, calm, and carried an authority that cut through the tension. "And she's a Pritchett. Welcome to the family, Lily."
I looked at Jay, my gaze steady. "Right, Jay? Another generation to keep the dynasty going. We're gonna need more footballs."
Jay looked at me, then at Lily, then back at me. He saw the way I was framing it—not as a 'political' move or a 'lifestyle' choice, but as an expansion of the clan. A legacy move. Jay's shoulders relaxed.
"Yeah," Jay said, his voice softening. "More footballs. And maybe some smaller closets."
[INTERVIEW - JAY]Jay looks at the camera, a small smile playing on his lips.Jay: "Mason has a way of... simplifying things. I was ready to make a whole thing about it. But the kid just looks at you and makes it feel like it was the plan all along. He's got a good head on those big shoulders. Better than mine, sometimes."
As the family swarmed Lily, I slipped back toward the kitchen. I needed some water, but I also needed a moment to check my phone. A notification had just popped up.
Bank of America: Transfer of $1,200.00 confirmed.
That was the payout from the senior class president for the 'custom' tablets I'd rigged up. My seed money was now sitting at a cool five thousand.
"That was a nice thing you did," a voice said.
I turned. It was Alex. She wasn't holding a book for once. She was holding a soda, watching me with an intensity that made most people uncomfortable.
"What thing?" I asked.
"Defusing Jay," she said. "You knew exactly what to say to make him stop being... Jay. It was high-level psychological manipulation. I'm impressed. And terrified."
"I just like a quiet dinner, Alex," I lied.
"Right," she said, stepping closer. "So, the 'Fixer.' How much did you make on those tablets today? I'm good at math, Mason. I saw the handoffs in the quad."
I didn't blink. "Enough to start thinking about the future, Alex. You want in? I need someone who can handle the books without asking too many questions."
Alex looked at the crowd in the living room, then back at me. A slow, mischievous grin spread across her face.
"I have some questions," she said. "But for a fifteen percent consultant fee, I might forget them."
"Ten percent," I countered. "And I'll fix your laptop so it runs three times faster."
"Deal," she said.
The Pritchett dynasty wasn't just growing by one baby. It was growing an empire. And the architect was just getting started.
[Need Powerstone]