Dan
She dragged me down the side hallway, around the corner to the dead-end by the vending machines where nobody ever went. Pushed me back against the wall, hands on my chest, eyes searching mine like she was looking for the old Dan under the new happy one.
"You're scaring me," she said. "You look like you actually believe this can work."
"It can," I whispered.
She shook her head. "No. It can't." Then she grabbed my face, pulled me down, kissed me hard, urgently, like she was trying to drag me back to who we used to be.
I froze for half a heartbeat. Then kissed back. Old habit. Muscle memory. Her mouth was familiar, tasted like black coffee and the same lipstick she'd worn for years as we worked together. Her hand slid down my chest, over my belt, palmed me rough through my jeans like we'd done a hundred times after bad cases or long nights.
I groaned deeply , involuntary and rocked into her hand.
She kissed harder, tongue sliding in, reminding me without words that she'd been there when my ex left me bleeding on the floor, that she'd stitched me back together, that she knew every scar.
Then I moaned.
Not her name.
"Sky."
One word. But it echoed like a gunshot.
Lena went rigid. Hand still on me, but everything else locked.
I pulled back fast, horrified. "Fuck. Lena, I didn'tmmm"
She shoved me hard back slamming the wall again. Her face twisted shock, hurt, fury all crashing together.
"Don't," she hissed. "Don't you fucking say my name when you're thinking about him."
"Lena…. "
"Get out." The voice broke on the last word. She turned away, arms wrapped tight around herself like she was holding pieces in. "Just get the hell out."
I stood there, chest heaving, guilt so thick it choked me.
Then I left.
Walked past Jax who looked up once, saw my face, looked away again grabbed my shit, and got out of there before anyone else could see.
Rain started the second I hit the parking lot. Not drizzle. Full-on downpour. Hammering the roads, turning the world gray and loud. I got in the car, door slamming too hard, sat there with the engine off, hands locked on the wheel until my knuckles screamed.
Then I broke.
Forehead to the steering wheel. Tears rolling down my eyes, breath hitching so bad I thought I'd throw up. Rain pounded the roof like it was trying to bury me.
Because I was falling in love with him.
In love with Sky so much it hurt to breathe without him next to me.
And I'd just kissed Lena kissed her like it was still 2020 and she was the only thing keeping me sane and moaned his name like he was the center of my fucking universe.
That was the proof. The smoking gun. I was gone. Too gone. Too deep. Too stupid. Same mistake, different face. And if I kept going I'd drag him down with me case compromised, safety blown, him shipped off somewhere I couldn't reach, or worse. What if he was the traitor as they said.
I cried until my throat was raw, until my eyes swelled shut, until the sobs turned to these pathetic wheezing gasps that made me hate the sound of my own voice.
Then I started the engine.
Drove slowly through the sheets of rain, wipers slapping uselessly, headlights cutting weak yellow tunnels.
Pulled over twice more because the crying came back fresh fists hitting the dash, curses as u yelled at the windshield, "fuck fuck fuck" over and over until my voice cracked.
Because yesterday I'd had him.
His laugh in my kitchen. His body under mine. His trust when he let me knot him raw and call him baby. The way he'd looked at me in the park like I hung the moon.
And tonight I had to take it away.
No contact. Separate detail. No more mornings. No more notes. No more "love you" that I'd actually meant.
I sat in the car outside my building for twenty minutes. Rain easing to a steady drum. Face wiped on my sleeve until it was soaked. Eyes burning. Chest hollow.
Finally got out.
I Walked up the stairs slowly, like every step weighed a thousand pounds.
Key in the lock.
The door opened.
Lights on because he'd left them for me.
And there he was curled on the couch in my hoodie, necklace glinting, phone clutched like he'd been waiting.
He looked up.
Saw my face.
And the smile that started died before it formed.
"Dan?"
I shut the door behind me.
Leaned against it.
Took a breath that felt like swallowing glass.
And started the conversation that would end us.