Julia sat at home and decided to keep herself busy. The babies were asleep and both her mom and sister were out. The house was unusually quiet. So she sat on the bed and began folding her clothes slowly, her hands moving on their own while her mind wandered. As she reached the bottom of the pile, her hands touched something familiar, she pulled it out.
A uniform.
St. Monica college.
Her chest tightened
She hadn't planned to think about it but memories don't give permission. St. Monica came to her in pieces-the early morning cold, the punishment by seniors, stealing of food and clothes and the way she always tried to be invisible.
Behind these thoughts, there was a more bigger one.
There was him.
*** she met him during her first year at that school. At first, their paths didn't cross but when it crossed, his mocking eyes always found her. They were like enemies, constantly clashing, constantly avoiding each other.
Then somehow, things changed.
Years passed and they became close. Too close. They met several times outside school, walked together, talked, laughed, spoke about family, said their experiences and hugged each other almost not wanting to let go. When they texted, it felt like only the both of them existed in the world. He called her sweet names gave her listening ears and was always there.
Somehow, that was enough to make her feel special.
When they met, she didn't tell anyone about it.
It felt like something fragile-like something which might break if spoken aloud.
But there were signs.
Signs she chose to ignore.
The way he always ignored her when he was with his friends.
The way he only hugged her when no one he knew was around.
The way his sweet texts didn't seem real.
Still, she stayed.
Because somehow to her it felt real.
she felt loved.
she felt seen and heard.
And when someone makes you feel that way, you hold on to them.
So she did.
Even when it started to hurt.
T.B.C