"As expected, bad guys always live long lives. Congratulations on being blacklisted by God, Tony! This is terrible news for me, though—I've been coveting the cars in your garage for ages."
It seemed like his tiny butterfly wings had managed to make Tony's palladium poisoning disappear earlier than expected. That was good, but he wondered if this change would still allow Rhode to get a suit of armor from Tony and become War Machine.
"You're a complete bastard. Sharing good news with you was a mistake. When are you guys coming back? Waiting for the hammer situation to wrap up?"
After bantering with Tony for a bit, Qin Xiao suddenly seemed to remember something. He moved to a secluded spot and said mysteriously, "I need to ask you something, Tony. Only you can help me!"
"Your sneaky behavior makes me think of a thief. Do you have some kind of man-disease? I can't help you with that, buddy! I'm perfectly healthy and strong in that department. You'd better ask Banner—I think he took some medical courses or something."
Tony looked at Qin Xiao's secretive demeanor with a look of disgust.
"Shut up, you damn pervert! My health is perfectly fine. My second son is so healthy he could smash through your armor. I just got back from Mexico, remember? I laundered a lot of money from those drug cartels and opened an account at the Swiss Bank."
"I opened it at one of the drug lords' homes. You know, Zurich has many banks. I want to ask which one is the safest. I want to transfer the money again!"
Qin Xiao glanced around to make sure no one was listening before whispering into his phone.
"That's it?" Tony's face fell, disappointed. He'd expected some grand secret.
"Watch your tone, Tony. I'm a billionaire now—a full three billion dollars! Three billion! My God, I don't even know what to buy. A mansion? A yacht? Any suggestions?"
Tony Stark, visible on the screen, looked down at Qin Xiao with a condescending gaze.
"I thought you'd done something major. Is three billion dollars worth all this? UBS—that's the merger of Union Bank of Switzerland and Swiss Bank Group. Any bank website with those three letters is reliable. Anything else?"
Though Tony hadn't said it aloud, Qin Xiao read the word "pauper" in his eyes.
"Tony, I admit you're incredibly wealthy, but three billion dollars isn't a small sum anywhere. I think you should show me a little respect. Do you even know what three billion dollars represents?"
Qin Xiao had just permanently solved his financial problems in this world. With such a massive fortune, he was filled with pride and confidence. How could he tolerate Tony's disdainful gaze?
"I'm not sure, my friend. Three billion dollars... that was the amount for a contract between Stark Industries and the Department of Defense once, or maybe a tiny fluctuation in the stock price. I don't really keep track. You know, I'm not particularly interested in the numbers in my bank account."
"Motherfucker!"
Qin Xiao angrily hung up the phone. That was the pinnacle of humblebragging.
Billionaires came in tiers. From now on, he'd be an idiot to mention money in front of Tony Stark.
"Excuse me, sorry to bother you. Are you alright?"
"Am I alright? What do you want?" Qin Xiao snapped, his tone automatically irritable.
He turned to see a disheveled old man—none other than the genius astrophysicist, Erik Selvig.
This guy made a surprisingly frequent appearances throughout the entire Avengers series.
Thor 1 and 2, The Avengers 1 and 2.
In The Avengers 1, he was precisely the one controlled by Loki, who developed a device and used the massive energy of Stark Tower to scientifically open a stable portal to the Cosmic Cube.
This allowed the Chitauri army to pour into New York in an endless stream.
Qin Xiao's attitude startled the old man, who whispered nervously, "I have a friend... his mind is a bit... you know, he went missing yesterday. I heard he came here, and I wanted to ask if you've captured him. If you're also one of their..."
Dr. Erik Selvig pointed to a sign above the greenhouse camp behind him.
"Department of Homeland Security's Strategic Defense, Attack, and Logistics Support! A bit of a mouthful, right? That's me. If your friend also shouts every day that he's Thor, the God of Thunder, son of Odin, and the All-Father, then that's him."
Erik Selvig nodded frantically in agreement. He had only come here to demand the man's release after Jane Foster's persistent begging—otherwise, who would willingly deal with such a secretive intelligence agency?
"Alright, your friend looks pretty sick. Don't forget to take him to the doctor when you get back. You there!"
Qin Xiao waved over a guard.
"Go inform Agent Coulson that the madman's friend is here to claim him. He'll understand what I mean."
He led Erik Selvig aside to wait and made small talk for a bit, but Qin Xiao quickly lost interest.
These brilliant scientists are often socially awkward, taking ages to respond to anything unless it's their area of expertise.
Someone as exceptionally gifted as Tony Stark, who was also so engaging, is truly a rare find.
Before long, Agent Coulson emerged with two guards, escorting Thor.
Ever since he failed to lift his hammer last night, the god of thunder had been like a lost soul, silent and dazed.
"Thor, are you alright? Jane sent me to bring you home."
Whether it was the familiar voice of Dr. Erik Selvig or the mention of Jane's name, Thor looked up, a flicker of life returning to his eyes.
"Dr. Selvig, are you here to take me away?"
"Yes, Jane is waiting for you outside. I'm here to take you home!"
Heeding Qin Xiao's warning, Agent Coulson let Dr. Erik Selvig and Thor pass without asking for any identification.
It was a complete waste of the fake documents they'd spent all night having someone make.
However, after Dr. Selvig and Thor had left, Coulson discreetly had an agent follow them.
Four chapters are complete! The next part of the story will jump back and forth between Thor and Iron Man 2. Hmm... I'm wondering if I should have Qin Xiao and Tony cause some trouble in Asgard!
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