Ding dong, bing bong!
"Good morningkuma..."
"Now there are only two of us left to say 'Good morningkuma'..."
"Monokubs? What's that?"
"Monotaro, your memory's bad, but come on! How do you forget even that!?"
"Monotaro? What's that supposed to be? Can you eat it?"
I woke up to the Monokubs' painfully unfunny comedy routine.
"...Jeez. What the hell do I do now?"
The second I got up, I let out a groan. Even after forming an alliance with Oma, I somehow had two more problems to worry about.
The new revelations, the 'ringleader selection system' and 'Momota is the Mastermind,' weren't things I could just brush aside.
'First off, this ringleader selection system... does that mean any one of us could become the Mastermind? Damn it... what is this, some kind of Among Us knockoff...?'
Considering that Shirogane and Hoshi had both been 'eliminated' from becoming the Mastermind... this killing game was obviously built on a system where anyone could be chosen.
And the method used to make that happen was probably [Memory Flash]. That thing was a complete scam of an item, capable of planting fake memories into someone's head and making them feel utterly real.
And the current victim of that fraudulent little nightmare was probably...
...
...
'...According to Monodam, Momota Kaito.'
It was already enough to drive me insane knowing anyone could become the Mastermind because of this ringleader selection system. But now Momota was the current imposter too? That was enough to make my skull split open.
If it came out that he was the ringleader, the kids' fragile cooperation would crack with a horrible dissonance. I'd only just managed to win Oma over. I couldn't let that alliance collapse for a reason like this.
'First, drag Momota somewhere secluded and subdue him... then ask Harukawa to use the honey trap?'
If anyone could somehow talk him down, it would be Harukawa, considering they had been lovers. And if that failed, well... I could always throw Ikusaba into the mix and force him to behave. It was worth trying.
Besides, he was already sick and in bad shape anyway...
'Wait. In bad shape?'
Something about that was wrong. Why was his body in such terrible condition?
If he was the ringleader, there was no reason for him to stay sick. That would only interfere with his role as the Mastermind.
'He definitely looked like he was struggling last night... and he coughs all the time, too.'
Putting all the pieces together, there was a very high chance Momota was genuinely ill right now. And if he was still carrying that illness despite being the ringleader, then...
'I don't know the details, but it means he must've had some kind of conflict with Monokuma's side.'
Looks like I'd found a way to persuade him after all.
.
.
.
.
.
"Hey, Iruma!! You in there!?"
"..."
"Iruma!!! Open the door!!!"
After leaving the dorms, I was now pounding furiously on the door to Iruma's research lab.
I needed to ask her to make a cure for Momota.
"..."
But something felt off. No matter how many times I called out, there was no response.
'...Wait. This has a really bad vibe. Don't tell me...!?'
Wasn't this exactly how body discoveries always started in Danganronpa? The protagonist would have this exact kind of internal monologue, open the door, and then find a corpse.
That thought sent a spike of dread through me. Praying she was safe, I hurriedly grabbed the doorknob and turned it.
"...Huh?"
Creeeak...
The knob turned far too smoothly, and then the door slowly slid open.
"...Iruma?"
"....."
"Iruma!!"
The moment I stepped inside, I nearly had a heart attack. Iruma Miu was sprawled unconscious on the floor of her lab.
In that instant, I understood exactly how every Danganronpa protagonist must have felt when they found a body. I grabbed her and shook her desperately.
"Wake up! Iruma! Wake the hell up!!"
But she stubbornly refused to stir, and in a panic, I started slapping her cheeks like a drowning man clutching at driftwood.
"Mmm...? What? Why am I here?"
Then, after a moment, the girl I'd been half-convinced was dead suddenly frowned and sat up.
"Huh? You weren't dead...? Oh, right. Yesterday she got hit with a sedative and collapsed on the floor..."
I was so distracted by the ringleader selection system and the whole Momota disaster that I'd completely forgotten what happened yesterday, and ended up punishing Iruma for no reason. At this rate, I was going to get branded a violent teacher.
"What... time is it?"
"Eight in the morning."
"Th-then... does that mean... you violated me all day long...? Is that it...?"
"...What?"
"D-did you do it inside? You did, didn't you!? There's no way there'd be a condom here... y-you..."
"Is she still high on drugs or something?"
"I-if this is how it is, then take responsibilityyy..."
My head started throbbing all over again at Iruma's obscene nonsense, and I grabbed her by the hair and hauled her upright.
"D-domestic abuse...!"
"Quit spewing crap and listen to me for a—"
"K, what exactly did I just hear?"
"...Mr. K, please tell me that's not true. Right now."
Hearing Ikusaba and Tojo behind me, I turned around and found both of them glaring at me with glacial expressions.
"N-no, I mean... this is..."
"H-he's a rapist!! I got raped!!"
"You won't do me, but you'll do her...?"
"...Shall I tie him up?"
I was seriously going to lose my mind.
.
.
.
.
.
"W-what...? Why isn't there any change...? Why...?"
"No, I mean... because I seriously didn't do anything..."
After protesting my innocence for a while, I remembered one of her inventions, the [Experience Count Measurement Sensor], and decided to use it to prove I was innocent.
"But... how does this thing even work? It works properly, right? Why are the digits..."
"A-after I first measured it, I thought the machine was broken too, so I checked it over a bunch of times... but there wasn't anything wrong with it..."
"....."
At those words, Ikusaba and Tojo started staring at me again, but this time with a very different kind of chill. Naturally, I had no idea why. The only memories I had left were of the killing game and the children I'd taught.
Was this what they meant by responsibility without pleasure?
"No matter how I think about it, this is weird... why isn't there any change? Why?"
"Give me that."
"Ahh!!"
As Iruma kept tilting her head in confusion, I finally snapped, snatched the sensor out of her hand, and pointed it at her instead.
"W-why are you pointing that at me!?"
[Experience Count: 0]
"Ah... uwaa! Uwaaa...!!"
"Can we stop this now?"
"Y-you're telling me a gorgeous girl like me was lying there and you didn't gobble me up? Are you impotent? No, wait, you can't be impotent. But then that's even weirder... if you're not impotent, then why the hell not!?"
"..."
I was just about ready to flick her in the forehead if she kept talking nonsense, but then I noticed the way her eyes were starting to shake, and a very good idea hit me.
'I'm going to need a lot of favors from Iruma going forward... If I make her feel indebted to me now, it'll be a lot easier to ask.'
"All I did was give you a sedative, and then you suddenly lost consciousness and collapsed. I got worried, so I stayed up all night taking care of you..."
"...What?"
"If that invention hadn't existed, I would've been branded a rapist. Man... that's kind of sad... haha..."
I put on the most pitiful expression I could manage as I said it, and Iruma answered in a flustered voice.
"Y-you really took care of me all night...? W-why would you...?"
For some reason, Iruma was watching me with frightened, uncertain eyes. It almost made me feel like the aggressor here, but no. I was the victim of a false accusation, so I decided to stand tall.
"If someone collapses... of course you take care of them, don't you?"
"I-I don't believe you...! Right! I can just ask her...!"
Iruma suddenly clapped her hands, then grabbed a remote from the desk and pressed a button.
"G-ghhrrk!!"
At once, Shirogane, who had been locked in a cage a short distance away, woke up screaming.
"Hey... were you... awake during the night...?"
"Y-yes! I was awake!"
"Then... you saw K taking care of me while I was passed out... right?"
"Y-yes... ?"
Shirogane started looking at me with a puzzled expression.
"Uh, well... ngh!"
Thinking this was about to go completely sideways, I quietly signaled to Ikusaba and Tojo, who were standing beside me. The two of them immediately turned their cold stares on Shirogane.
"...Yes! He took care of Ms. Iruma all night! He didn't take his eyes off Ms. Iruma's face for even a second!"
"T-that... that's true?"
"I told you it was! We even have a witness now... are you still not going to believe me!?"
When I raised my voice, Iruma visibly shriveled and started mumbling in a tiny, crawling whisper.
"B-but... you... you hated me enough to... to kill..."
"You... what?"
"Didn't... you hate me... enough to kill me...?"
"What kind of random nonsense is that? If I hated you, I wouldn't have even told you to quit the drugs."
"Th-then... do you like me...?"
".....I do care about you, but that's true for the other students too—"
"U-uuuuuh...!!!"
Iruma's face turned bright red at my answer, and beside us, Shirogane suddenly lit up and started firing words like a machine gun.
"C-come to think of it... after taking care of Ms. Iruma for a long time, Mr. K suddenly gazed at her so wistfully... and then, just like waking a sleeping Snow White, he moved in toward her lips...!"
"....."
"...S-sorryyy....."
I shot Shirogane a freezing glare, cutting off the deranged fantasy she was spinning with that disgusting little grin of hers, but...
"Huuuh... huuuhhh... huuuhhhhhhh....."
"...I think she's broken."
"I'm going insane..."
Thud!!
"...Oh, for the love of—"
Iruma, whose face had gone red enough to hit the absolute limit, finally collapsed again.
"...Ikusaba, fix her."
"For this kind of thing, if you beat her hard enough—"
"No, that came out wrong because I panicked. Tojo, fix her."
"...Shall I bring a whip?"
"...Forget it. I'll wake her up myself."
In the end, with dead eyes, I started slapping Iruma's cheeks again.
.
.
.
.
.
"..."
The moment she came to her senses again, Iruma was asked by K to develop a cure for an illness. After saying she'd need him to bring her someone who actually had the disease, she sent K and the others away and sank into thought.
"U-um... it's breakfast time... so if you could let me out..."
"....."
"I-Irumaaa...?"
"...Shut up."
"Ggghkikikikikik!!"
With an irritated expression, Iruma activated the electric shock device and knocked Shirogane unconscious again. Then she carefully pulled out a walkie-talkie with a recording function from a drawer and pressed the button.
"Right, now that I think about it, we were supposed to hold a strategy meeting about how we're going to kill Iruma from now on, weren't we?"
"Yeah! Thank goodness you didn't forget!"
"Ah, but I've already got plans tonight... if dawn works for you instead..."
Iruma closed her eyes and quietly listened to K and Oma's voices coming from the machine. Then, in a dejected voice, she muttered:
"Shit... no matter how you act, you can't fool the genius Iruma-sama... You're obviously doing this to lower my guard, right...?"
Muttering with a gloomy face, Iruma soon hardened her expression with resolve. She grabbed the things on her desk and sprang to her feet.
"So... before you kill me... I guess I have to strike first after all..."
Then, just as she was leaving the research lab with her belongings in hand, Iruma hesitated for a moment and muttered timidly:
"...But what if he meant it?"
And so, despite all the effort she'd put into dramatically leaping to her feet, Iruma ended up standing blankly in front of the entrance for quite a while, unable to move.