"So… she would grow anxious, suspicious—ugly, even hysterical.
Why are her eyes always on other people?Why is she still chatting with others when she's with me?Am I just a source of entertainment to her—just a small, insignificant part of her life?
Does she even really like me?"
Matsueda Azusa continued calmly:
"On one hand, I sincerely wished for her happiness. I wanted her to shine, and I would feel proud of her.
But on the other hand… I was afraid.
Afraid she would become so outstanding that I could never catch up.Afraid she would eventually leave me behind.
That kind of twisted insecurity… that jealousy… is probably unavoidable."
He paused briefly.
"If I'm the only one carrying all these complicated emotions… then how do I prove that she feels the same way about me?
That 'forever' we promised—was it just a childish joke?"
Matsueda shrugged.
"At that time… neither she nor I truly understood anything.
It was like the evening sky outside the window—you can't tell whether it's day or night.
Just when you think you understand it… it changes again."
"Maybe… at the moment she made that promise… she didn't think she was lying."
"But—"
His voice hardened slightly.
"If you claim to like someone, yet you can't accept the way they love you… doesn't that mean what you loved wasn't the real 'me' at all?"
"Just an illusion… something you imagined, given my name."
"Falling for an illusion.Entering a relationship carelessly.Making promises lightly.And then walking away just as easily…"
"I can never forgive that."
He exhaled slowly.
"…But after the anger fades… you realize something."
"Even I'm not free from that mistake."
"So in the end—"
"Love itself is a mistake."
"And immature love… is a mistake among mistakes."
Matsueda concluded:
"If you already know it will end one day…then instead of chasing what you'll gain—"
"You should think about what you'll lose."
"Sometimes… what you lose matters far more."
"That's why I created this club."
"The couples I break up—wouldn't have lasted anyway."
"And even if they stayed together… they wouldn't be happy."
"As for the ones I can't break up…"
"I wish them well."
Hikigaya Hachiman was stunned.
Matsueda Azusa… did you just try to save everyone?
You're… way too soft.
Even though their experiences were completely different—
The emotions felt strangely similar.
That quiet sense of resonance.
Maybe real growth only comes after being hurt.
After carrying pain you can't forget.
After learning, the hard way, not to repeat the same mistake.
People only grow after being hurt… humiliated… broken.
—Wait.
Don't just start relating on your own, idiot.
Hikigaya clenched his fists.
People can't truly understand each other.
"Bang!"
Hachinami Anna slammed her bottle onto the table.
"Matsueda—you're totally a yandere!"
"Pfft—!"
Onimizu Kazuhiko choked on his drink.
"No, seriously, this is peak yandere behavior!"
Anna doubled down.
"I mean, I get the feeling, but your breakup basically happened because you didn't know how to love properly, right, President?"
…That confidence from someone with zero experience.
Impressive.
Matsueda glanced at her.
"Love doesn't need to be learned."
"It's instinct."
"It's tied directly to human nature."
"What does need to be learned—"
"Is how to suppress it.How to dull it.How to turn love into something else."
"That's what people call 'loving properly.'"
"Possessiveness is the most honest form of love."
He adjusted a pair of plain glasses he had just taken out.
"Let me give you a simple example."
He pointed at Anna.
"When Hatada Kōsuke is with Himegami Karen… you feel pain, right?"
"…Because you like him."
Anna froze.
"…Y-yeah."
"Then what about the reverse?"
"If you were with another guy… would he react?"
—Wait.
Hikigaya's instincts kicked in.
This is a trap.
But Anna had already taken the bait.
"…Probably…?"
"Then that means he likes you too."
Matsueda said flatly.
"And yet—he still chose Karen."
"So what does that make him?"
"A complete scumbag."
"…That's just logic."
He spread his hands.
"Or—"
"Maybe he knows you won't leave him.But Karen might."
"So he prioritizes Karen."
"And keeps you as a backup."
"Playing both sides."
"Hatada Kōsuke is NOT like that!"
Anna slammed the table.
"Alright."
Matsueda nodded.
"Then let's assume he isn't."
"In that case—"
"Even if you date someone else, he wouldn't care."
"…Which means—"
"He doesn't like you at all."
"…Huh?"
Anna froze.
Her anger vanished instantly.
"…He… doesn't like me…?"
"Face reality."
Matsueda held up two fingers.
"There are only two possibilities."
"Either—he likes you, and he's a scumbag."
"Or—he's not a scumbag, and he doesn't like you."
"…Pick one."
Hikigaya watched with sympathy.
Stop bullying her, President…
But he wasn't going to interfere.
Not his problem.
Normies should just explode.
Anna struggled internally.
Then—
"No. Neither!"
She stood up firmly.
"It's not Kōsuke's fault!"
"He must've been bewitched by that big-chested demon!"
"It's all her fault!"
"President—you're right!"
"This kind of love is wrong!"
"I have to correct it!"
"…6."
Truly.
Simp logic was undefeated.
Matsueda gave a thumbs-up.
"Then we act immediately."
"We save Hatada Kōsuke."
Anna grabbed Kazuhiko.
"No time to waste! Onimizu—club duties, now!"
"???"
Kazuhiko blinked.
How did we get back to this…?
Wait—
Wasn't Matsueda supposed to explain his past?
Why did the topic shift again?
Am I the only one who noticed?!
The sunset spread across the sky like burning embers.
The city softened under the warm glow.
After nearly an hour on the train—
Matsueda Azusa arrived in Ikebukuro.
Evening slowly deepened.
At the entrance of RING, a familiar figure appeared.
Long brown hair swayed gently in the breeze.
Blue-green eyes locked onto him.
Nagasaki Soyo.
Matsueda didn't stop walking.
He waved casually.
"Yo, Soyo. What a coincidence."
"Here to support my CRYCHIC's first live performance?"
He emphasized my.
He was in a good mood today.
Soyo's smile stiffened for a moment.
But she quickly recovered.
"CRYCHIC… doesn't belong to you alone, Azusa."
"It belongs to everyone, right?"
Matsueda's smile faded.
"…Everyone?"
He stopped.
"Who exactly are you talking about?"
"The ones who abandoned everything without hesitation?"
"It's not like that!"
Soyo clenched her arm.
"Sakiko must have had her reasons!"
"And besides… you're also partly responsible, aren't you?"
"If you apologized—maybe… no, definitely…"
"CRYCHIC could—"
"Is she your parent or something?"
Matsueda cut her off coldly.
"You're defending her pretty hard."
He glanced at his watch.
"Let's get one thing straight."
"She dumped me."
"I didn't dump her."
"If she left because of me…"
"Then she should've made me leave."
"Not disappear on her own."
Soyo tried to speak—
But he didn't let her.
"I know I made mistakes."
"I was ready to take responsibility and leave the band."
He pushed the door open.
"But you know this, Soyo."
"If she had stayed…"
"Even without me—CRYCHIC would never have fallen apart like that."
"She chose to leave."
"Without hesitation."
Soyo rushed forward and grabbed his arm.
"Don't you feel anything for CRYCHIC anymore?!"
"Don't you care about what we had?!"
Matsueda frowned.
"If I didn't care—"
"Why would I still continue it?"
"Even if none of you are here…"
"I'll carry it to the end."
He pulled his arm away.
"After Toyokawa left—"
"You were the one who insisted on bringing everyone back."
"And now you're the one who gave up—because she didn't return."
"I didn't!"
Soyo shouted.
"Then you should've been on stage today."
"That was your place."
"You gave it up."
"…!"
She couldn't respond.
Sakiko had disappeared.
She couldn't even contact her.
How could she focus on performing?
"…Back then…"
Soyo whispered.
"We were all so united…"
"United?"
Matsueda laughed.
"Really?"
"Who was trying their hardest?Who was falling apart?Who wasn't even working as a team?"
"…Can't you see it?"
Silence.
Then—
"Azusa… you'll regret this."
"Soyo."
Matsueda raised his hand—
And flipped her off.
"I'm the leader now."
"Bang!"
A door burst open.
Shiina Rikki rushed out, nearly colliding with him.
"Drummer? What happened?"
Matsueda caught her.
"Did something go wrong?"
Rikki sighed in relief.
"It's you."
"Why are you so late?! We're almost up!"
"Sorry, sorry."
Matsueda smiled sheepishly.
"I got delayed by a troublesome person."
"But don't worry."
"Even if I got hit by a car, I'd crawl here."
"It's our first live after reforming."
"This song… is everything we've worked for."
"Don't say things like that!"
Rikki punched his shoulder lightly.
"If you're hurt, go to the hospital properly!"
"…What happened, anyway? Should we call the police?"
Matsueda scratched his cheek.
He glanced back—
Soyo was already gone.
…She slipped away fast.
Maybe she's secretly a ninja.
Probably for the best.
If she and Rikki had met—
Things definitely wouldn't have ended peacefully.