Jay's POV..
🎵Hearts beat fast..Colours and promises, How to be brave?How can I love when, I am afraid to Fall..But watching you stand alone..All of My doubt suddenly goes away somehow ..🎵
Hospitals were strange.
No matter how many people walked around you, no matter how many voices echoed through the hallways, everything still felt painfully empty.
Especially when the person you wanted to hear the most stayed silent.
I sat beside Keifer's bed for hours without moving properly.
Nobody forced me to leave anymore.
Maybe because they already knew I wouldn't.
Or maybe because they were scared to leave me alone with my thoughts.
I didn't know.
And honestly…
I didn't care.
My fingers stayed wrapped around his hand the entire time as if holding it tightly enough would somehow stop him from slipping away from me.
But he still didn't wake up.
Not even once.
The machines beside him kept making soft sounds that were slowly driving me insane.
Every beep made me anxious.
Every small movement made me look up immediately hoping..
Praying...
That he would finally open his eyes.
But nothing happened.
Nothing.
And that silence was killing me slowly.
I looked at his face again, trying to find something familiar in it.
Something that looked like my Keifer.
But it hurt seeing him like this.
Too still.
Too quiet.
I hated it.
"You know…" I whispered softly, my voice already tired from crying, "you're really annoying."
No response.
A weak smile appeared on my lips for barely a second before disappearing again.
"You always act like nobody can touch you." I looked down at our hands. "Like you're invincible or something."
My throat tightened painfully.
"And now look at you…"
A tear slipped down my cheek silently.
I quickly wiped it away angrily.
I was so tired of crying.
But no matter how much I tried stopping myself, the tears just kept coming back.
Because every time I looked at him..
Reality hit me all over again.
This was real.
This was actually happening..
"I told you not to go to London," I whispered shakily. "I literally told you…"
The memory replayed inside my head painfully.
Me asking him not to leave.
Him smirking softly while brushing my hair away from my face.
"You overthink too much, Jay jay."
A broken laugh escaped my lips.
"Yeah?" I muttered weakly. "Then why does it feel like my overthinking was right this time?"
Silence.
I looked at him again desperately.
"Say something…"
Nothing.
I slowly rested my forehead against our joined hands, squeezing his fingers tighter.
"You promised me you'd come back."
My voice cracked completely on the last word.
And suddenly all the emotions I had been trying to hold back since yesterday completely broke apart.
"I hate you right now," I cried softly. "Do you even know what you did to me?"
Tears kept falling one after another uncontrollably now.
"I was sitting there waiting for your call like an idiot while you were here fighting for your life…"
My breathing became uneven again.
"Do you know how scared I was?" I whispered painfully. "I thought maybe you were ignoring me… maybe you were busy…"
A sob escaped my chest.
"But this?" I shook my head weakly. "This is worse."
"You know right?? On Island you were begging for me to forgive you and then what about those Watcher and caretaker of yours"
I lifted my head slowly to look at him again.
Even unconscious, he still looked unreal to me.
Like if I blinked enough times, he would suddenly sit up and complain about how dramatic I was being.
I wanted that so badly.
I wanted his voice.
His teasing.
His stupid smirk.
Anything.
Just not this silence.
The door behind me opened softly, but I didn't bother turning around.
I already knew it was Percyand Aries .
He had been checking on me every few hours without saying much.
For once, even they didn't know what to say.
That scared me too.
"You should rest for a little while," percy spoke quietly.
"I'm not leaving."
"Jay.."Aries said.
"I said I'm not leaving."
My voice came out sharper than intended.
But didn't argue.
He just sighed quietly before walking closer.
"He wouldn't want you exhausting yourself like this."
I laughed bitterly through my tears.
"Well he should've thought about that before getting himself shot."
The room went silent again after that.
And immediately guilt hit me.
I closed my eyes tightly before whispering softly...
"I didn't mean that…"
Percy placed his hand gently on my shoulder.
"He knows."
That only made me cry harder.
Because what if he didn't?
What if these were the last things I ever said to him?
No.
No no no.
I quickly shook my head violently.
I couldn't think like that.
I refused to.
Keifer wasn't leaving me.
He couldn't.
Not after everything.
Not after all our plans.
Our engagement.
Our future.
He promised me forever.
And Keifer never broke promises.
…right?
The thought alone made my stomach twist painfully.
I looked back at him again and carefully brushed a few strands of hair away from his forehead.
"You better wake up soon," I whispered shakily. "Because I swear, when you wake up I'm actually going to kill you myself."
Another tear slipped down my face.
"I'm serious this time."
Still nothing.
That silence was becoming unbearable now.
And then suddenly...
The machine beside him made a strange sound.
My head snapped up immediately.
The beeping changed rapidly.
Fast.
Uneven.
Wrong.
Fear shot through my entire body instantly.
"Keifer…?"
More sounds.
Louder now.
Panic rose inside my chest.
"Keifer!"
The door burst open immediately as doctors and nurses rushed inside quickly.
Everything happened too fast after that.
People moving.
Machines sounding loudly.
Voices overlapping.
And suddenly someone was pulling me away from him.
"No...wait!" I cried out immediately, trying to reach him again. "KEIFER!"
"Miss, please step outside!"
"No! Let me go!"
I struggled desperately as tears blurred my vision completely now.
"Keifer!" I screamed again, my voice breaking painfully. "Keifer please!"
But he still didn't answer me.
And somehow...
That terrified me more than anything ever had before..
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