Arkana's apartment. Three in the morning.
His bedroom was spacious and neat—like always. But tonight was different. The desk lamp was still on. The bed was still made, untouched. Arkana sat on the chair by the window, staring outside. The night city view stretched below him—tiny twinkling lights. But his eyes were empty.
Arkana couldn't sleep.
He'd tried for hours. Lying down. Closing his eyes. Counting numbers. But every time he closed his eyes, Rania's smile appeared. That smile. The same smile from when she got into that black car yesterday afternoon.
Tired. But his eyes were wide open. Dark circles were starting to form under his eyes. His hair was messy—rarely happened.
*Who is he? Boyfriend? Fiancé? Husband?*
The question spun in his head like a broken cassette.
He reached for his phone. Opened Rania's photo. An old photo—from when Rania was presenting, he'd secretly taken it from afar. Rania was smiling at the client. A professional smile. But still beautiful.
He let out a long sigh.
*If that's her boyfriend... I should stop.*
But his heart said otherwise.
Frustrated. His hand reached for his hair, making it even messier.
He stared at the ceiling. Thinking about what went wrong. What was lacking. What made him too late.
The wall clock showed 4 AM. Then 5. Then 6. The sun began to rise on the eastern horizon. Arkana hadn't slept a single second.
---
Friday morning. Seven-thirty.
The office building parking lot. The morning sun was warm, but not too hot. Employees were arriving, some carrying coffee, some still looking sleepy. The sound of cars and motorcycles could be heard from a distance.
Arkana arrived at the parking lot in his car. As soon as he got out, his eyes caught something.
A black car. Latest model. Luxurious. The same car as yesterday.
He immediately tensed up. His body froze beside his car.
The black car door opened. Rania got out. Her brown sling bag. Thin denim jacket. Shoulder-length hair left loose today. Beautiful. Always beautiful.
*Together again. This morning too.*
He swallowed. His mind immediately jumped to the most painful conclusion: *Did they leave from the same house? Or does he actually pick her up every morning—that devoted?*
Then the driver's side door opened. That man got out.
Same as yesterday. Tall, neat, handsome. Black suit. Warm smile. He stood beside Rania, saying something.
Rania laughed. Tapped the man's arm—like they were joking around. The man responded by ruffling Rania's hair.
Arkana's jaw tightened. His fists clenched at his sides. But he couldn't look away.
*This is the second time. And it doesn't feel any better than the first. It hurts more.*
Rania waved at the man. The man waved back, then got into the car. The black car drove away.
Rania turned around, ready to enter the building. Then her eyes met Arkana's.
Startled, then immediately smiled. That bright morning smile.
"Mr. Arkana! Morning!"
Rania waved cheerfully as she walked closer.
Panic in silence. He wasn't ready. Not yet.
"Mo... morning."
His voice was hoarse. The voice of someone who hadn't slept all night.
Rania stopped a few steps in front of him. Her eyes scanned Arkana from head to toe.
Confused. Then worried.
"Sir, are you okay? You look... really pale?"
Arkana looked away. "I'm fine."
"Did you sleep last night?" Rania asked, her tone starting to sound like a worried mother.
"Yes."
"Really?"
Arkana was silent. His silence was an admission.
Rania's eyes narrowed. She knew Arkana was lying.
"Sir... your eyes are so dark. That's called Panda eyes. And your hair..."
Rania pointed at Arkana's hair—usually perfectly styled, now messy with stray strands sticking out in odd directions.
"...Did you have a fight with your comb, sir?"
A small smile. Not mocking, more like amused. But Arkana couldn't read that.
Arkana touched his hair. A mess. He hadn't looked in the mirror this morning.
"And your tie, sir..."
Rania pointed at Arkana's tie—the knot was crooked, not centered. One side longer than the other.
Arkana looked down. Saw his tie. Crooked. Messy. Like its owner.
Embarrassed. But trying not to show it.
"Let me fix it, sir."
Sincere. Light. Like this was normal.
Before Arkana could protest, Rania was already standing in front of him. Very close.
Morning at the parking lot. Other employees passed by, some glanced, but didn't really care. The morning sun shone on them. A gentle breeze carried the smell of coffee from the café across the street.
Rania reached out both hands. Reached for Arkana's tie.
Her hands—warm—touched Arkana's neck as she undid the messy knot.
Frozen. His body stiff as a statue. His heart pounded wildly. He didn't dare breathe.
*Don't stop. Keep going. Touch me again.*
But his silence remained.
Rania focused on the tie. Her hands moved skillfully, undoing, straightening, then tying it neatly again. Occasionally her fingertips touched Arkana's shirt collar, straightening it.
Focused. Her lips slightly pursed. Her face only inches from Arkana's chest.
"There, all neat."
Rania patted the tie with slight satisfaction. Then stepped back. Smiled.
Still frozen. His face was red—whether from embarrassment or pounding heart. His ears were red. His neck—touched by Rania's fingers—felt hot.
"Sir? Are you okay? You look even paler?" Rania tilted her head.
Arkana swallowed. Hard.
"I'm... I'm fine."
Rania still stared at him, confused. "Are you sure, sir? Because you look really weak."
Arkana thought fast.
This was his chance.
He slightly hunched over. Made his face look more tired than it actually was (though he really was tired). His hand touched his forehead.
"Ugh... a little dizzy."
Pretending to be weak. But his eyes peeked at Rania's reaction.
Rania immediately panicked. "Oh no, sir! Don't faint here! I—I'll help you upstairs, come on!"
Worried. Anxious. Her hand grabbed Arkana's arm, supporting him.
Inside, Arkana smiled with satisfaction. But outside, he kept his weak expression.
"Thanks, Rania."
He made his voice sound weak. Rania didn't suspect a thing.
Tired, but there was a small smile appearing—though his heart was still anxious.
They walked toward the elevator. Rania held Arkana's arm the whole way. Arkana could feel the warmth of her hand. Could smell Rania's perfume—something sweet, like vanilla.
*This is enough. For today, this is enough. Even if she goes home with that man again.*
---
Office, 28th floor. The clock showed 12 noon.
Rania had just finished some documents. Her stomach growled. She glanced at the clock—lunch time.
Arkana's door opened. He came out. His face was still pale, but slightly better than this morning. His hair was neat now—he'd checked himself in the restroom.
Still cold, but there was a little nervousness.
Rania looked up. "Sir, feeling better?"
Arkana nodded. "A little."
"Have you eaten?"
Arkana shook his head.
Rania sighed. "Sir, you have to eat. You'll get weaker."
"Yeah. I'm going to the cafeteria."
Rania nodded. "Me too. I'm hungry."
His heart pounded. *This is it.*
"Then... want to eat together?"
Trying to sound casual. But his eyes—his eyes were full of hope.
Rania stared at Arkana for a moment. Then smiled.
"Sure, sir. But please don't faint in the cafeteria, okay?"
Joking. Casual. No suspicion.
Inside, Arkana breathed a sigh of relief.
"No promises."
Rania laughed softly. "Let's go, sir. I'll accompany you."
---
Office cafeteria, lunch time.
Rania and Arkana sat across from each other. Their table was full of fried rice and iced tea. The atmosphere was busy, but Arkana only focused on one person.
Rania was about to take a bite when her phone buzzed. She put down her spoon, picked up her phone, read the incoming message.
Reading, then pouting slightly.
"Huh?"
Arkana looked at her. "What's wrong?"
"Oh, nothing, sir. It's just..." Rania sighed. "The person who usually picks me up just texted. He said he has to work late, so he can't pick me up. I have to go home by public transport."
Slightly disappointed, but okay.
Arkana's face stayed flat. But inside his chest, something leaped. **HAPPY.**
"Oh... I see."
He tried to sound normal. But his hands—which had been clenched under the table—slowly relaxed. His heart, which had been pounding from nervousness, now pounded for a different reason.
*She's going home alone.*
*No that man.*
*No black car.*
*Just her.*
Rania didn't notice. She went back to eating enthusiastically. But Arkana... Arkana was planning something.
Still cold. But his eyes sparkled. A sparkle he couldn't hide.
Lunch time felt fast. Too fast. Arkana wanted time to stop. But he also couldn't wait for the evening.
---
Late afternoon. 5:50 PM.
Rania had just finished tidying her desk. The report was done. She stretched her arms, ready to go home.
The clock showed ten to six. Rania packed her bag—put in her favorite pen, organized documents, turned off her monitor.
She walked to Arkana's room. Knocked as usual. Knock knock knock.
"Come in."
Rania opened the door. "Sir, I'm going home now."
Arkana looked up. His face was cold. But his eyes... his eyes were different. There was something there. Something Rania couldn't read.
"Rania."
"Yes, sir?"
Arkana stood up. Straightened his jacket. Walked closer. One step. Two steps. Now he stood right in front of Rania—not as close as this morning when Rania fixed his tie, but close enough to make Rania slightly tense.
Confused. Her eyes blinked rapidly.
"S... sir?"
Arkana took a breath. Like gathering courage.
"You said earlier... you're going home alone?"
Rania nodded. "Yes, sir. The one who picks me up is working late."
Trying to sound casual. But his heart was about to explode. *This is it. This is the moment.*
"Then..."
Arkana paused for a moment. Looked into Rania's eyes.
"...I'll take you home."
Shocked. Eyes perfectly round. Her mouth slightly open.
"Huh? Sir, you don't have to—"
"I'm going home too. Coincidentally." Arkana spoke quickly, like he was afraid if he stopped, his courage would disappear. "Might as well, since it's on the way."
Rania was confused. This was the first time Arkana had offered something like this. Her cold, quiet, rarely-speaking boss—suddenly offering to take her home?
Awkward. But she also didn't know how to refuse.
"But, sir—"
"Come on." Arkana had already grabbed his car keys. He tried to sound firm, but he was actually trembling. "It's late. You'll be out too long."
Rania stared at Arkana for a long time. Looking for something in that face. But Arkana's face—as usual—was hard to read.
Finally, she nodded slowly.
"O-okay, sir. Thank you."
Inside his heart, Arkana smiled wide. He was screaming. He was dancing. *This is my chance.* Thirty minutes in the car. Just the two of them. No that man. No one else.
They walked to the elevator. The elevator door opened. Got in. The door closed.
Inside the elevator, just the two of them. Dim elevator lights. The sound of the motor humming softly. Arkana stood beside Rania. Silent. But his heart pounded wildly. He could spend 30 minutes in the car with Rania. Just the two of them.
Rania was silent. She stared at the changing floor numbers. 20... 19... 18...
Arkana was silent. He stared at Rania's reflection on the shiny elevator wall. Beautiful. Always beautiful.
*30 minutes. 30 minutes. What should I talk about? Maybe traffic, so it'll take longer?*
The elevator kept going down. 15... 14... 13...
And at that moment, Rania's phone buzzed.
Rania took it from her bag. Read the incoming message.
Her expression changed. From neutral, to slightly surprised. Then happy. **That smile.**
"Huh?"
Arkana turned. "Hm?"
Rania stared at her phone screen. Read the message again. Then smiled even wider.
That smile.
The same smile.
The smile that shattered Arkana's heart yesterday afternoon.
His chest suddenly felt cold. He didn't know why yet. But he was scared. Scared to death.
"Sir..."
Rania turned to Arkana. That smile was still there. Maybe it would always be there. But not for Arkana.
"The person who picks me up... he said he can make it."
Frozen. His world stopped spinning.
"He can?"
"Yeah. His overtime got canceled. So he can pick me up."
**He.**
Not "friend." Not "relative." Not "someone."
**He.**
That word was like a knife. Arkana could feel its tip stabbing his chest.
"He said he's already in the parking lot. Waiting for me."
The elevator stopped. Ground floor. The door opened.
Rania stepped out. Looked back at Arkana, who was still frozen inside the elevator. Not moving. Like a statue. Like someone who just lost something they never even had.
"Thank you for offering, sir. I'll go ahead!"
Rania gave a small wave. That smile was still there.
Then she turned around. Walked quickly. Jogged toward the parking lot. Toward that car. Toward **him**.
The elevator door slowly closed. Arkana still stood in the same spot. Not moving. Not blinking. Not breathing.
The door closed tightly, locking him in silence.
Arkana was alone. The elevator that had brought him down with so much hope, now slowly rose again—taking him back to bitter reality. He'd even forgotten to press a button. Or maybe, deep down, he really didn't want to go home yet. Because going home meant admitting that hope was truly dead.
His eyes were empty. He stared at his own reflection on the shiny metal elevator wall. His face was still cold as ice, but behind that mask, something was shattering into pieces. He could feel it. One by one.
The elevator kept going up. 5... 10... 15... 20... 28.
The door opened. 28th floor. Empty. Dark. Only emergency lights were on. Rania's desk was empty. His own room was dark.
Arkana stepped out. Went back to his desk. Went back to his room. Went back to where he started this day—only now, he was more tired. More empty.
He sat in his chair. Stared at the pitch-black monitor.
*Thirty minutes.*
*Thirty minutes he would never have.*
*That person.*
*The person who picks her up. The person who makes Rania smile like that. Them. Not me.*
His hand reached for the desk drawer. Took out that small notebook. Opened a new, clean page. Empty. Like his heart right now.
He took a pen, then wrote one short sentence:
*"Today: Almost."*
Arkana stared at that sentence for a long time, before finally adding one more line below it:
*"Tomorrow: Maybe never."*
Outside, city lights began to turn on. Tall buildings twinkled. Down below, thousands of cars moved. One of them carried Rania. Carried her home. Carried her away.
Arkana closed the notebook. Put it back in the drawer. Closed the drawer slowly. Like closing a hope.
He stayed there. In the dark room. Alone. Staring out the window, toward millions of city lights, wondering among which light Rania was now.
And who **he** was—the one who made Rania smile like that.
--- To be continued ---