The silence following the "Ice Cream Incident" was louder than the moans had ever been. Every time Jude's muffled voice rumbled through the cedar planks from the room next door, Se-ah would flinch so hard I thought she'd snap a tendon. The air was thick with the scent of cheap pine, damp sheets, and the agonizingly awkward realization that the "Golden Boy" was currently engaging in some very un-holy extracurricular activities.
"I can't... I can't stay in this 'flavor profile' anymore, Viktor," Se-ah whispered, her eyes fixed on a crack in the ceiling. Her face was still the color of a ripe beet. "Every time the bed creaks, I feel like I'm losing my sanity."
I looked at the wall. Jude was currently explaining something about "rhythmic mana flow" to the Instructor, and the wet, slapping sounds of their "training" were starting up again.
"System," I groaned, rubbing my temples. "I can't do this. My SP is tanking, and if I hear one more description of 'aggressive dairy consumption,' I'm going to interpret my own ears into non-existence. Fix the walls."
> **[System Message]**
> **[Oh, look who's begging for help again. The guy who sleeps to get abs now wants a quiet room. What's the matter, Viktor? Can't handle the 'Golden Boy's' stamina? You're a pathetic, sensitive little flower, aren't you?]**
"Just do it, you glitchy piece of shit," I hissed. "Interpretation. These aren't paper-thin cedar walls. They are **Five-Foot Thick, Sound-Proofed, Military-Grade Titanium Plates**."
**[Skill Activated: Interpretation (Rank E)]**
**[Target: Inn Walls]**
**[New Meaning: 'Acoustic-Dampened Titanium Armor']**
> **[System Message]**
> **[Interpretation Success. You lazy, deaf bastard. Enjoy the silence of your own insignificance. Fuck you.]**
The change was visceral. The wood grain under the peeling wallpaper shimmered for a split second, turning into a matte, cold grey surface that looked like the hull of a battleship.
The silence hit like a physical blow.
One second, we were being blasted by Jude's "expanded aura" grunts; the next, the room was as quiet as a vacuum in deep space. I couldn't even hear the wind whistling through the cracks in the window. It was glorious. It was the absolute, unadulterated peace of the void.
Se-ah blinked, her shoulders finally dropping from around her ears. "It... it stopped? Did they finish the... ice cream?"
"The walls finally decided to act like adults," I said, leaning back into my pillow. "Titanium tends to be very judgmental toward loud eaters. Now, let's get some sleep. We have a long day of being 'lucky idiots' tomorrow."
Se-ah let out a long, shaky breath, her silver hair finally settling. "Thank the gods. I thought I was going to have to assassinate my own hearing."
***
I drifted into a deep, dreamless sleep, the kind of sleep you only get when you've successfully gaslit your environment into total silence. I was dreaming about a world where systems were polite and 14-year-olds didn't have to deal with horny S-Rank rivals.
Then, I felt a faint vibration.
It wasn't the bed. It was the air itself. A strange, orange glow was beginning to pulse at the bottom of the door frame.
"System," I muttered groumpily, half-asleep. "Is the sun coming up already?"
> **[System Message]**
> **[Wake up, you absolute moron. While you were enjoying your 'Titanium Silence,' the rest of the inn has decided to become a giant bonfire. Your 'Ice Cream' neighbors knocked over a candle during their 'dessert,' and now the hallway is a literal hellscape.]**
My eyes flew open. I looked at the door. Through the thin gap at the bottom, thick, acrid black smoke was beginning to curl into the room like a snake. I looked at the titanium walls. They were cool to the touch, perfectly blocking out the sound of the screaming, the roaring flames, and the magical fire alarm that was undoubtedly shrieking its lungs out three inches away in the hallway.
"Se-ah! Get up!" I yelled, lunging for my boots.
Se-ah sat up, sniffing the air. Her spy instincts kicked in instantly. "Smoke? But... why didn't the alarm trigger? The Golden Griffon is supposed to have an enchanted siren!"
"The alarm is triggering, Se-ah," I said, grabbing the door handle and immediately hissing as the metal scorched my palm. "We just can't hear it because I interpreted the walls into noise-canceling armor. We're in a sound-proofed oven!"
> **[System Message]**
> **[LMAO. You literally 'Quiet-Quitted' your way into a furnace. You're going to die because you didn't want to hear Jude's 'Holy Moans'. This is the peak of comedy. I hope you like being medium-well, you stupid fuck.]**
I kicked the door. It didn't budge. The heat on the other side had warped the frame, sealing us in. The titanium walls were now doing their job *too* well—keeping the heat in and the rescue out.
"Interpretation!" I screamed at the ceiling. "The fire! It's not fire! It's... it's just **Aggressive Orange Lighting for a Rave!**"
> **[System Message]**
> **[DENIED. 0/5 Slots Available. Cooldown: 22 Hours.]**
> **[Notice: You spent your last slot on the 'Titanium' wall, remember? You're out of 'Logic juice,' Viktor. Better start praying, though I doubt anyone's listening to a glitch like you.]**
The orange glow intensified. The floorboards began to hiss.
"Viktor!" Se-ah grabbed my arm, her silver hair singed at the tips. She looked at the door, then at me. "The wall... if it's titanium... we can't break it! We're trapped!"
***