Word of the Day: Equanimity
Meaning: Mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation.
Example: Despite the sudden collapse of the building, Seo's equanimity allowed him to calmly assess the safest exit route while others panicked.
Hang on, please, dear.
The announcement in the subway reverberates. Then, the crash.
Darkness. Screams.
'Where am I?'
I open my eyes. It is missing the conventional sterile lights of the morning commute.
It is a huge circular stone room. Torches are flickering on the walls.
We are around fifty in number.
"What's happening? We had only been going to the office....
Assistant Manager Park with his briefcase in his hands looks around and falls back.
I attempt to analyze the circumstances.
'A mass kidnapping? Unlikely. It was a matter of a moment. None of that unconsciousness of his.
A blue holographic screen comes into existence.
[Introduction to the Tutorial]. [The only goal is survival. Time remaining: 30 minutes.]
'A death game.'
In most cases, when such situations happen, people do not accept reality.
Is this a covert camera program?
"Hey! Get out of this place!
I don't shout. I am at the back of it, being lost in the shadows.
I have a fast heartbeat. My hands are a little bit sweaty.
'I am feeling afraid.'
I dwell on the bodily experience. I feel that my muscles are tight and my stomach is tight. This is self-awareness which is emotional, the realization of how the body is conveying a feeling.
The question I am asking myself is: 'What is the source of this feeling?
It is the fear to die. The apprehension of the unknown. I am aware of the fact that all significant emotional responses are driven by fear or desire.
I do not repress it. I acknowledge it. Then, I apply self-control.
I take a breath. To change my response, I would have to re-frame my self-talk.
Rather than allowing my first impression to cause me to panic, I remind myself, and say, this is a new environment with established rules. I only have to know the variables and have a rest to ensure that frustration does not deprive me of surviving.
My heartbeat slows. My mind clears.
'Good. Accurate self-assessment complete.'
I look around. The remaining forty-nine individuals are still at the panic stage.
"Seo."
I turn.
"Seo! Deputy Manager Lee! What is this? What's going on?"
I draw my eyes open. I made my shoulders do shake a little.
"I... I don't know, Park. I'm scared."
When I am not flustered, I will be a leader. When I grow to be a leader, I would be a target.
A leader must be a responsibility taker. A leader is supposed to take care of others.
I do not want to save these individuals. I want to use them.
The massive stone doors at the extreme end of the room squeal.
There is a low growling in the room.
It's a wolf. But it is the size of a small auto, and has matted black fur and coals for eyes.
The System panel is updated.
[Shadow Wolf (Lv. has moved into the tutorial.
"A-a monster..."
"Run!"
The crowd breaks. Panic is a contagion.
The wolf lunges. Its teeth are closed on the body of a man wearing a tailored suit.
Blood flies on the stone foundation. The man shouts, the gurgling, wet, scream, and then it becomes slack.
The smell of copper strikes the air.
The mob is simply inspired by the fear of suffering.
Like cockroaches they infest.
I step slowly, with a bunch of three frightened college students in between me and the wolf.
I need to observe. I should identify the appropriate tools.
Over there. A tall university varsity jacketed man. He is pale, but has fists clenched. He is carrying a heavy metal pipe which he picked out of a broken railing of the wall.
He is so scared, but his fight-or-flight mechanism has gone over to the fight side.
A meat shield.
And there there, beside the pillar. A young lady in a pair of round glasses wildly sweeping at the air.
She is communicating with the System. Testing the interface.'
A brain.
The wolf completes the first meal and glances up. Its burning eyes are fixed on Assistant Manager Park who has bumped into his briefcase and fallen face first in the ground.
"No! Help! Somebody help me!"
Park screams, crawling away like a crab.
The wolf walks up to him.
I could step in. It would most likely be distracted by me.
But why would I? Park is a coward who has no physical utility. The speed with which the wolf can cover a ten-meter distance is a useful measure of his death.
I watch.
The wolf pounces. Three seconds. Too quick to be caught by an ordinary human being.
The scream of Park is interrupted.
'Thirty-eight people left.'
The varsity jacket man screams, "Hey! You overgrown mutt!"
He goes on to chuck a rock at the monster.
'Stupid. But useful.'
The wolf turns. It is snarling, and flops down with the ruined body of Park.
The sports boy throws his metal pipe in the air when the wolf is lunging.
CLANG.
The beast is struck by the pipe on its head. The kinetic force tosses the man back, sliding on the stone floor. He spits a lot of blood, yet he is alive.
'He has high durability. Good.'
The wolf is dazed.
This is the moment.
I uttered a very well-pitched scream of fright and ran towards the athletic guy, faking to fall on the ground as I go.
"Ah!"
I collapse, skating next to him.
G-get up, says the fellow, and he attempts to pick his pipe once more.
"I... my ankle!" I cry, and hold on to his jacket. Do not go, please, leave me!
I am using empathy. Being emphatic enables you to be in the good graces of another individual and know what is driving his or her actions.
He threw this rock because he desires to become a hero. His desire is to rescue individuals.
I am only justifying his need to be liked by hanging on him.
Stay behind me! he yells and his face is flushed with terror and adrenaline.
'Perfect.'
The wolf wonders and turns his head and fixes his eyes on us.
It charges.
The man waves the pipe once more, but he is trembling with his arms. He's going to miss.
I cannot yet allow my meat shield to perish.
I am cowering behind him when, with my hand, I scoops a jagged bit of stone, which I picked up on the floor.
Just when the wolf is about to open its jaws I flick my wrist.
The stone flies out, hits the wolf directly on its burning right eye.