Kazuma's rigid posture instantly fell apart. He hurriedly tucked the check deeper into his clothes, his eyes sharpening with the wariness and hostility of one scumbag spotting another.
"Who the hell are you? Can't you see we're conducting a serious Hero Party interview here? If you're not lining up, then get to the back."
"Pfft. Hahahahaha! An interview? Serious?" Dust laughed like he'd just heard the greatest joke of his life, slapping his thigh before leaning in toward them. Lowering his voice, he spoke in the kind of tone only fellow trash could understand. "Oi, I got bored of this whole trick of milking Beldia's name for cash, free food, free drinks, and free fame three years ago. Just look at the eyes on you two... sheesh. That hunger for money, that disgust at anything troublesome, that constant readiness to bolt at any second. I could smell it from three streets away."
Then he turned to Kōichi and grinned.
"Especially you, Kōichi. That kick that sent the head flying was definitely cool, but what you were really thinking was just kicking that annoying ball as far away as possible so it wouldn't come back and bite you again, right? It just happened to turn into a hero-worthy finishing blow by pure luck. And now you're probably in your head counting up how to spend the bounty, aren't you?"
Kōichi looked at Dust's face, a face that practically screamed I'm trash and proud of it, and felt a slight jolt inside.
So this was the legendary scumbag radar.
This guy had seen straight through the glittering shell of heroism and into the pathetic, twisted mess underneath.
"Tch. So you figured it out." Kōichi gave up on pretending, leaned back in his chair, crossed one leg over the other, and flashed a grin just as warped as Dust's. "Since you've already seen through us, are you here to wreck our setup, or are you here to ask for a cut?"
In that instant, Kōichi and Satou Kazuma reached a level of mental synchronization that only top-tier scum could achieve.
No words were exchanged. All it took was one glance, and each of them read the same thing in the other's eyes.
Not one coin.
Faced with Dust's shameless expression, the kind of face that blatantly said if you saw it, you get a share, Kazuma made the first move.
The tension vanished from his face in an instant, replaced by a bright, shameless smile even flimsier and more spineless than Dust's. He even threw an arm around Dust's shoulder like they were old friends.
"Oh wow, brother, you really are an expert. Since you've already seen through us, there's no point hiding it anymore." As he spoke, Kazuma subtly flashed Kōichi a get-ready signal with his other hand. "A cut? Naturally, naturally. That would only be fair. But you can see how famous we are now. The bounty may be huge, but our expenses are insane too. Just the alcohol Aqua drank yesterday could've bought half a stable..."
Kōichi caught on immediately. He put on a miserable expression, let out a long, weary sigh, then pulled out a thick stack of... applicant resumes, meaning scrap paper, and slapped them hard into Dust's hands.
"Brother Dust, since you know the business this well, we won't treat you like an outsider." Kōichi clasped Dust's hand with deep sincerity, his eyes full of the relief of a man who had finally found someone to pass the burden to. "To be honest, that thirty-million bounty is actually a scorching hot potato. The Demon King's Army already has its eyes on us. See those hundred-plus weirdos behind us? They're actually all assassins sent by the Demon King's Army. Total bullshit, obviously. We were just worrying over who could help us shoulder this risk."
Dust froze for a second, then looked down at the stack in his hands, resumes filled with specialties like nostril flute performance and underwear infiltration.
"Huh? Assassins? This bunch?"
"Exactly. That's the Demon King's Army's most sinister tactic. They use idiots to grind down our mental strength." Kazuma said it with absolute conviction as he casually stuffed the wooden sign reading [Hero Party. Talent Interview Office] into Dust's arms. "So sure, we can talk about profit-sharing later, but first you'll need to help us deal with the remaining two hundred interviewees. We'll pay you... five Eris per applicant as a handling fee. How about it? This is a huge business opportunity."
"Hey! Five Eris can't even buy a bun! You two are even more twisted than I thought!"
Only then did Dust finally realize he was the one getting freeloaded off by these two kindred spirits.
Faced with Kōichi and Satou Kazuma's ironclad, miserly reverse exploitation, Dust stood there stunned for three full seconds. Then his thug-like face twisted into a bizarre expression that somehow mixed rage with admiration.
He hurled the resumes to the ground. Naturally, he was smart enough not to throw the wooden sign.
"That's enough, you bastards! I thought I was already shameless enough, but who knew Axel had given birth to two true trash gods like you!" Dust snarled through clenched teeth, his eyes filled with the despair of finally meeting his match. "Five Eris? Who are you trying to fool, a beggar? Listen up. Forget hush money. But tonight, you two are taking me to that Succubus shop. And we're getting the top-tier 'Pure-Type Succubus. Memories of First Love' package. You're paying, Kōichi, both of you. Otherwise I'm heading straight to the square and shouting, 'The great heroes Kōichi and Kazuma are actually complete and utter frauds!'"
The moment Kazuma heard the words Succubus shop, the hand clutching the check loosened on its own, and a deeply vulgar look of scheming desire crept into his eyes.
He leaned close to Kōichi's ear and muttered in a tiny voice full of longing,
"Big Bro Kōichi... as punchable as this guy is, his proposal... does have merit. Think about it. For millionaires like us, this kind of expense is nothing. And if he ends up owing us one, it'll make things a lot easier next time we want to get up to no good in Axel..."
After listening to Kazuma's whisper, a dangerously sinister smile curled onto Kōichi's lips. His eyes, normally still capable of passing for respectable, were now flickering with a dark gleam known only as twisted depravity.
Kōichi tilted his head slightly, covered his mouth with one hand, and let out a low, eerie chuckle only Kazuma could hear.
"Heh heh heh, Kazuma, you're still too soft." Kōichi lowered his voice, his tone carrying a chill-inducing calculation. "Treating him? Of course we are. Brother Dust has already put it this far out in the open. As great heroes, how could we possibly refuse such a tiny request from a comrade? But... did you forget how the Succubus shop works? The wish request form is filled out by the one paying for it."
Kazuma froze for a moment. Then his deadbeat face lit up like never before. He sucked in a sharp breath, then broke into a grin even more sinister than Kōichi's and smacked his thigh hard.
"Ohhh! Big Bro Kōichi! You're basically an interviewer sent by the devil! I get it now. I get it completely! Dust wants 'Pure-Type. Memories of First Love,' right? Then we'll help him polish it a little. For example... right at the crucial moment of confessing to his first love, the other person suddenly turns into a two-meter-tall, musclebound, heavily bearded macho guy?"