"Wait! Prosecutor Sena! This is absolutely a false accusation!"
Kōichi shot to his feet and planted both hands on the table. His mind spun at full speed as he unleashed the strongest excuse-making ability of his entire life.
"The core's teleportation coordinates were completely random! We were all out of magic at the time, so how could we possibly guide it with enough precision to hit the lord's manor? This was clearly a mechanical failure caused by an ancient Mobile Fortress falling apart from age! We were forced to move it in order to protect the hundreds of thousands of people in Axel. That's called emergency necessity!"
"Right, right, right!" Kazuma nodded wildly as if clutching a lifeline, even squeezing out a few tears. "We don't even know which way the lord's manor gate faces! Prosecutor-san, think about it. If we wanted to subvert the state, why wouldn't we just teleport the bomb straight to the Royal Capital? The lord's manor just got unlucky and drew the grand prize of destruction. We're victims too!"
Sena let out a cold laugh, looking at them like two Slimes struggling in their final moments.
"Random? With all that wilderness outside Axel, it crossed more than half the town and landed with extreme precision right above Lord Alderp's most heavily guarded private underground vault? Do you think the Kingdom's Magic Investigation Corps is blind? Take them away!"
Several tall, imposing Knights immediately stepped forward, taking out heavy shackles that glowed with anti-magic light.
At that critical moment, Darkness suddenly rushed forward with a flushed face and hugged one of the Knights by the leg.
"Please wait! Prosecutor-sama! Actually... Actually, I planned all of this! I developed an indescribable sadistic desire toward the lord's obese body and greedy personality, so I ordered them to throw the bomb over there! Come, don't just arrest them. Arrest me too! Bind me with the thickest chains, drag me back to a dark, damp dungeon, and interrogate me mercilessly! Hah... hah..."
Sena and the Knight both sucked in a sharp breath and retreated two steps, as if they were looking at an extremely dangerous infectious disease.
"Exactly! What is one mere lord's manor worth?!" Megumin also leaped onto the table, raising her staff high as a dangerous gleam flashed in her red eyes. "I am Megumin! If we were going to subvert the state, how could we possibly use some broken bomb we picked up? I would personally walk to the gates of the Royal Capital and use my strongest Explosion Magic to blast the entire country flat! So this is absolutely not subversion of the state. At most, it was a minor mistake before my ultimate magic exercise!"
Sena's face had gone from livid to pale, and even the hand gripping her sword began to tremble.
What kind of terrorist group is this?
"Exactly! Are you people even reasonable?!" Aqua clung tightly to the full-length mirror with its pure gold frame and shouted in a rage. "Kōichi and the others are heroes who saved the town! Even if they blew up the lord's manor, the lord is rich, so he can just build another one! You can't arrest them! If you arrest them, who's going to pay off the loan for this mirror and those expensive red wines?! I bought these on credit using my hero privileges! If you dare touch my property, I'll bring down divine punishment and turn you all into frogs!"
"Enough!!!"
Sena had finally reached her limit.
She drew the longsword at her waist with a sharp clang and pointed its tip straight at the group of problem children. The pressure of a high-ranking professional instantly swept across the whole room.
"A perverted noble with severe masochistic tendencies! A terrorist threatening to blow up the Royal Capital! And a madwoman suspected of massive fraud!" Sena roared through gritted teeth, veins throbbing on her forehead. "Listen carefully! If any of you takes one more step forward or says anything dangerous again, I will arrest all of you as co-conspirators in subversion of the state! I will confiscate every bit of your personal property and throw you into an underground water dungeon that leaks year-round, is crawling with rats, and only serves moldy black bread every day!!!"
"..."
The air in the hall froze for a full second.
Whoosh.
The next second, Aqua, Megumin, and even Darkness, whose face still clearly said she wanted to go to the water dungeon, all took a huge step back in perfect unison, their movements smooth and precise.
Aqua hid the golden mirror behind her back, began whistling off-key, and looked up with intense focus at the chandelier pattern on the ceiling.
Megumin jumped down from the table, pulled out a cloth, and began wiping her staff with incredible seriousness, as if she had not heard a word of what had just been said.
Darkness was still struggling to lunge forward, but Aqua clamped a hand over her mouth, leaving her able to make only desperate muffled noises.
The expressions on all three of their faces were strangely identical.
We're just passing by. We don't know these two criminals at all.
At that moment, Kōichi and Kazuma reached a resonance deep in their souls.
It was the understanding unique to sadistic adventurers, known as "if we die, everyone dies together."
The two exchanged a look. There was no sadness in their eyes, only identical cunning.
"Wait! Sena-sama!" Kōichi suddenly pointed at the three hiding in the back and pretending to be dead, his voice booming as if he were proclaiming justice. "Since this is subversion of the state, it has to be a group crime! Aqua provided the magic, Megumin gave targeting advice, and Darkness was in charge of supervision! The two of us were just manual laborers moving the core! If you're arresting people, then no one in this room gets to run!"
"Exactly! Especially that blue-haired one!" Kazuma frantically backed him up, pointing at Aqua as he shrieked. "She was the one shouting, 'Let this core go where it belongs!' Isn't the lord's manor exactly where it belongs? This was definitely her idea! She's the mastermind! She's the leader of the terrorist organization!"
Sena's suspicious gaze shifted toward the three shrinking figures.
"Waaah! What are you talking about?!" Seeing that the golden mirror and red wine were about to be lost, Aqua instantly became a born actress. Tears poured from her eyes like fountains as she clutched her chest, looking heartbroken. "Sena-sama, don't listen to their slander! I was crying and shouting back then, even kneeling to beg Kōichi not to teleport something so dangerous to the lord's manor! I told him the beloved lord lived there and that we absolutely must not offend him. But Kōichi... he gave this sadistic smile and said he wanted to blow the whole place flat! I'm just a poor, weak girl who was forced by them and could only provide a tiny bit of magic!"
"You lying deadbeat Goddess!!"
Kazuma was so furious he almost broke free from the Knight's hold to rush over and strangle her.
"I-I'm the same..." Megumin hugged her staff, her eyes darting away, her voice so weak she sounded like she might stop breathing at any second. "After casting Explosion Magic, my mind was already completely blank... I vaguely remember trying to persuade them, saying that art should be pure and not used for political destruction, but they thought I was annoying and knocked me out... Yes, I was a victim of violent suppression."
"Mmph... Mm!" Darkness had her mouth covered by Aqua, but she finally managed to break free. Although her face still carried that suspicious flush, she struggled to speak in order to protect her family's honor. "I... I really did want to stop them. I even proposed using my body to block the teleportation beam, but they refused... Failing to stop them in time was indeed my failure as a Knight. Please, by all means... when you judge them, please give me a harsh verbal reprimand as well!"
Kōichi and Kazuma stared in utter disbelief.
This textbook example of shifting blame had completely redefined the lowest possible meaning of the word "partner" for both of them.
"Enough!!!" Sena let out a roar powerful enough to shatter glass. Looking at this shameless group biting at one another with no bottom line, she felt her professional career had suffered an insult unlike any before. "You people... are a disgrace to adventurers! No matter how you try to talk your way out of this, Lord Alderp specifically named Kōichi Hayashi and Kazuma Satou for arrest! As for the rest of you... since you claim you tried to stop them, stay in this mansion and reflect on your actions while awaiting summons at any time! If you dare run away, you'll be wanted throughout the entire city!"
Sena swung her hand down sharply.
"Take them away! Throw these two rotten schemers into the deepest dungeon! I will interrogate them myself!"
"Kōichi! Kazuma! Go with peace of mind!" Aqua waved a little handkerchief from behind them, wearing the radiant smile of someone who had narrowly escaped disaster. "I'll stay here in the mansion, drink the remaining red wine, and pray for you! Do your best, and try to last a few more days in prison!"
"Aqua!! I won't let you get away with this, even if I become a ghost!!"
Kazuma's miserable scream echoed through the hallway, then was completely cut off by the heavy slam of an iron door.
The two were hauled away by two Knights, dragged toward the dark, damp dungeon of the lord's manor.