Kōichi took a deep breath, his face settling into a solemn expression that was almost martyr-like.
He crossed his arms, gave a small nod, and spoke with the righteous air of a man declaring that if someone had to descend into hell, it might as well be him.
"Chris, I understand. As an upright Wizard, looking directly at a girl while she performs such a shameful act goes against my principles. But to save you from this curse, I am willing to shoulder this heavy mental burden. Please don't feel pressured. Think of me as an emotionless stone statue, and begin your performance!"
That said, Kōichi's eyes, wider than usual by several degrees, and the grin tugging stubbornly at the corners of his mouth had already betrayed every last one of his true thoughts.
"K-Kōichi! You pervert! You're obviously looking forward to this! You absolutely are!!"
Chris let out a wail. Her cheeks were so red from sheer embarrassment that they looked ready to start steaming.
Unfortunately, the Chatterbox Ring had no intention of showing mercy just because she resisted. The ruby on the ring flashed faster and faster, as though urging her on.
Chris's hands trembled as if pulled by invisible strings, rising to either side of her head. Her index and middle fingers bent slightly, forming a pair of vivid, even somewhat playful, cat ears.
"Ugh... I-It's starting..."
Chris squeezed her eyes shut, her long lashes trembling. Those hands, usually decisive and deadly when gripping daggers, were now making a cutesy pose that would put even Axel's most popular Succubus shop to shame.
"M-Meow... meow-woo... meow meow... I-I'm Master's most obedient little kitten..."
Her voice shook badly, thick with the sound of someone on the verge of tears. The sheer contrast between the normally gallant young Thief and the soft, adorable creature before him made Kōichi feel the last thread of reason in his mind begin to snap.
The ring's light grew even brighter, as if warning her that she still wasn't being sincere enough.
Chris threw everything away. She snapped her eyes open, her gaze damp and tinged with desperate resignation.
She wiggled her hips at Kōichi, shaped her hands into a heart in front of her chest, and cried out in a voice sweet enough to make any man's bones melt.
"M-Moe-moe-chu! ❤ Master, I was secretly thinking about you just now... For that, please give me the most, most intense punishment, meow!!!"
Ding!
With a crisp sound, the ring that had tortured Chris for so long seemed to lose all its magic. It slipped from her sweaty finger, dropped into the dirt of the mine with a soft clatter, and turned back into an ordinary, battered copper ring.
Deathly silence fell over the mine once more. Only Kōichi's slightly heavy breathing and Chris's heartbeat, pounding as if it might burst from her chest, remained.
Chris stayed frozen in that adorable pose for a full three seconds.
Then she let out a scream loud enough to pierce the entire mine and curled up in the corner like a frightened rabbit. She wrapped her cloak tightly around herself, leaving only a pair of eyes, almost blazing with fire, glaring at Kōichi.
"Kill me! Kōichi! Blast me to pieces with your magic right now! If this memory remains in the world, I'm going to suffer a divine essence collapse from shame!!!"
Kōichi silently picked up the now-dull ring from the ground and sighed.
"No, Chris. I'll treasure that scene as a lifelong keepsake, hidden in the deepest part of my memory. And by the way, that little 'meow' at the end was a stroke of genius."
"You really are a pervert!!!"
Seeing Chris huddled in the corner of the mine like a little quail drenched by rain, the flame of bad taste known as the spirit of Kazuma Satou instantly flared up into a raging wildfire deep inside Kōichi's heart.
A goddess who was normally so gallant, one who even looked down upon all beings from Heaven, though she was currently a young Thief, had shown him a bashful pose worthy of being recorded in the darkest pages of Axel's history. Not taking the chance to tease her a little more would be a betrayal of himself.
Kōichi deliberately let out a long, meaningful sigh, then slowly approached the silver-haired figure currently shutting down in the corner.
"Oh, Chris, why are you hiding from me? I saw that Moe-moe-chu pose perfectly clearly. Especially that little twist of your waist at the end. It was simply filled with... hmm, divine allure. Honestly, the sound of you calling me Master is still echoing in my head. I can't get it out at all."
As he spoke, Kōichi crouched in front of Chris. With no shortage of malice, he even reached out a finger and gently poked her shoulder, which was tightly wrapped in her cloak and still trembling faintly.
"Don't touch me! You perverted Wizard! Stay away from me, meow! Ah... no! Not meow! That was the curse! The curse was talking, not me!!"
Chris jerked her head up. Her pretty face was red enough to bleed, and tears of shame and anger clung to the corners of her eyes. She looked like a kitten whose tail had been stepped on but was too weak to fight back.
"Oh? Is that so?"
Kōichi showed his signature wicked smile, brimming with perverted intent. He leaned close to Chris's ear and whispered in a voice only the two of them could hear.
"But as I recall, the ring only makes you say your true feelings out loud. It never said it would make up lies, did it? Which means... that desire to be intensely punished by me just now was actually your deepest, truest wish, right?"
"Uwaaah! No! Absolutely not! That's a misunderstanding! A huge misunderstanding!"
Chris was so embarrassed she nearly fainted. She instinctively swung a small fist at Kōichi's chest, but because her whole body had gone weak, the motion looked more like she was acting spoiled.
"Kōichi, you awful jerk! And here I thought you were a reliable partner. How could you... how could you bully me like this! I'm going to complain to Goddess Eris! I'll have her deduct all the luck from your next life!"
"Go ahead. Goddess Eris is so gentle that after hearing my request, she might even descend personally and perform Moe-moe-chu for me as compensation."
Kōichi laughed even more happily. Teasing a goddess felt even better than earning a hundred million Eris.
Seeing Chris so angry and embarrassed, wanting to run away but unable to move because her legs had gone weak, left his mischievous heart deeply satisfied.
He even started wondering whether using Steal on Chris right now might get him something even more interesting. For example... underwear with cat ears on it?
"All right, I'll stop teasing you." Seeing that Chris was genuinely about to cry, Kōichi finally restrained himself a little. He reached out, his tone still a bit flippant but gentler now. "Come on, Master... ahem, I mean, let me carry you back. In your current state, I doubt you can even make it out of the mine entrance. Consider this free manual transport as the price of admission for that spectacular performance just now."
"Who asked you to carry me?! You opportunistic bastard!"
Chris said that, but when Kōichi's arms slipped under her knees and around her back to lift her in a princess carry, she only struggled symbolically a couple of times. Then she buried her burning face in the crook of his neck and let out a tiny whimper, as faint as a mosquito's buzz.
"...Promise me, okay? You absolutely, absolutely cannot tell Kazuma what happened just now, and you can't tell Aqua-senpai either... Otherwise, I'll really die in front of you, meow."
"Yes, yes, my little cat-eared assistant."
Holding the soft, limp embodiment of a Goddess in his arms, Kōichi stepped into the glow of the setting sun and left the mine, thoroughly satisfied.